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/d/ humor
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You are currently reading a thread in /d/ - Hentai/Alternative

Thread replies: 337
Thread images: 186
File: Fap loss.png (109 KB, 1324x380) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
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I couldn't find one, so let's get a good /d/ humor thread going.
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>>5500946
unf
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>>5500953
This is the best thing to ever come from those threads.
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>>5500966
Huh, I have not tried to fap in taxi, and over shoulder. Gotta try that. I ain't gonna not fap for 30 days tho.

Otherwise I done them all.

Some I repeat every week.
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Extended

http://deviants-despository.booru.org/index.php?page=post&s=view&id=6596
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>>5500966
>Corruption
That reminds me: has anyone ever seen Rule 34 of Mr. Rogers?

This isn't a request, exactly, since I have no desire to see pornography of Mr. Rogers, I'm just curious if it exists. I'll take your word for it, but I'm not interested in speculation (e.g. "I'm sure you could find it" or "There's porn of everything, of course it exists").

I think he might be the exception.
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DID SOMEONE ORDER A HEEPING PILE OF THE STOIC ORC?
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>>5501553
Part two
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>>5501557
Part 3
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>>5501367
Wow all the typical fetishes of /d/ in one gif, I'm impressed.
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>>5501564
No is no longer the answer as indicated by the last panel.
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>>5501560
There are better translations of that, you know.
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>>5501564
is there more ?
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I swear this board has the funniest shit on the whole site.
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>>5501367
>Trap Rosalina
Excellent
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>>5501739
Isn't that artist the one who made that holes manga?
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>>5501564
>that last panel
the dick in my heart is erect
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Oh my, my favorite thread hath reappeared, looks like I better help out!
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>>5501487
rule 35
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>>5501564
>She completely loses it in the last panel
T-This isn't even a fetish now. It's...LOVE.

Wait fuck is there a love fetish?
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>>5501746
It is, Machino Henmaru.
>>
Found this in a thread yesterday. I saved it for the future's generations.
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>>5500942
Suace? I really wonder what this comic is about now
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>>5503336
'Fraid I don't have the source, found it on another humor thread.
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>>5500966
>same fap-cloth for one week

I've had mine for three years! Never once been washed!
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>>5503017
Yes
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>>5503453
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>>5501149
sauce on this?
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>>5503567
Pretty Face 9
Lrn2 Google
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This thread doesn't have enough action, let's kick it up a little!
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>>5500966
68 total achievements
hell, I'm fapping right now
>>
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>>
>>
greetings from /co/
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>>5503458
Well if you use a sock, only the smell can disturb you. I have a body smell fetish so...
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5K1RcKJVbHA
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cx28MlhY8zc

I found this on /c/ of all places!
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>>5503336

Manga is Maid in Japan. No idea if the quote is real, a joke-but-still-close translation, or just straight up humor though.
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>>5504349
http://www.mangatank.com/manga/maid-in-japan/v1/c5/10-3

Quite real. Google-foo is your friend...
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>>5502716
>filename
god help us
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uyNJZ-2Dod4
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Not relate to /d/ but this must be shared
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>>5501487
Yes. Look up animation "The Ultimate Orgy", a parody of "The Ultimate Showdown"
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>>5503897
I use towels. Not any specific towel, but literally all of them. They get washed and intermingle with the rest in the washroom that yet to be sullied by my wrath. The family still doesn't know. On my deathbed I will tell them out of spite
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oh god no
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See? If we all work together, we can truly enjoy our time on 4chan. Even non-/d/ things may gather here. So long as it is funny and perverted (in any sense of the word), then it is welcome in this thread. This thread is a home to the homeless, a life for the lifeless, and a fetish for the fetishless. Let us all rejoice, for we have found a small corner of the internet where, for once, all is fine.
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someone post that one that goes "in your imagination i can be anything you want"
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>>5500966
>behind seven proxies

That's my normal, because I don't live alone. That way if need be I can recoil my hand and nobody is any the wiser
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Some men just...blah blah blah...
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Requesting the cap of "I know that dick" please.
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>>5504967
Holy christ, I remember making that post a few months ago.
Nice to know that people still like it
Anyway have some polandball
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>>5505022
Holy christ? Really? Well, fine if it's bad puns you want...
>>5504967
Man, he sure is hung.
>>
You know women get $5,000 for donating an egg to science, men get, at the most, $50 for donating sperm. It seems terrible, but at least I can tell people I have a towel worth half a million dollars setting on my bedroom floor.
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>>5504967
That fourth post is obviously a Tumblrfag, ugh.
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>>5505086
Oh god I didn't even realize the christ thing when I posted it
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>>5502050
These are allowed in these threads?

(yes, I know the second and third posts are mixed up)
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>>5500966
Score: 28
How'd you do, /d/?
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>>5505679
49
Step it up, senpai
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>>5503858
Blue Beetle is the bees knees.
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>>5505679
>>5505897
Wow, you guys suck.
57, btw.
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>>5505897
87. yu rac diciprine.
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>>5503453
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>>5505016
You have good taste my friend~
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>>5505534
>Gardevoir has dick-sucking lips
>Gardevoir has no visible mouth
Ok.jpg
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>>5500966
Why isn't something along the lines of "Create something, fap to it" here?
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>>5500966
I've already got 20 of these.
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Keepin' it alive, come on people, keep the dream alive!
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>>5501581
Nah, she just misinterpreted the "Orc's appetite". Basically he asked her to cook more, she hears it as "I wanna pork you too".

Cue condom, since she promised that in the first part.
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>>5505679
>>5505897
>>5505944
>>5505987

column 1: 23
column 2: 25
column 3: 26
total: 74

20 years of faps
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>>5500966
46
I'm saddened they're mostly mundane.

>>5501564
Thank's guy. Never would have found out more of this gold was made.
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>>5500942
DESTINYYYY
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>>5500943
Thank god, I've been looking for this for a while. In return, I present this.
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>>5507180
MISSA THINK YOUSSA CANT CALL IT RAPE SINCE YOUSSA WHERE SO GENTLE!
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>>5505093
Well I mean it's because women can't re-

Oh. Oh I see.

You funny.
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>>5503897
I have fapped using other people's underwear such as panties and boxers.

Not for fetish reasons you understand but because I don't want to mess up mine.
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>>5502050

I always laugh my ass off at that one.
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>>5507020
I found it on the last /d/ humor thread I made.
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>>5505987
We're not worthy! We're not worthy!
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>>5500966
>Chris Benoit

Was this made before he went crazy?
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>>5505987
>Post number
>score
> mfw
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>>5504853
Sorry that I'm a bit late, it this the one you wanted?
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>>5507419
that's it, thanks
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>>5507463
I wish there were a futanari and newhalf/shemale version but I'm afraid the outcome would be disastrous.
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>>5507547
Go request that in one of the /d/rawthreads, you might get lucky.
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>>5507562
Good idea.
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>>5505679
25.

Trap Fap was not on purpose.
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>>5505022
>polandball
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>>5506313
Every fuckin' time.
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>>5507601
Fun fact
There's a subreddit about erotic polandball comics
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>>5500953
I saved this because I know I'd need it one day!
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>>5500935
I was on that day....it was good day
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>>5507418
I-Is that a fellow /k/ommando?
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>>5507686
...
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>>5500966
79. This is the part where I post Shinji's cum-soaked hand, complete with subtitles I suppose.
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>>5503017
Sure! That's the only reason why I acquired all my fetishes: love and holding hands

>>5507686
probably
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>>5508012
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>>5508018
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>>5508020
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>>5508024
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>>5508025
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>>5508026
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>>5508032
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>>5508035
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>>5506966
I don't understand how "satisfied" was translated in such a convoluted fashion
But I don't read Japanese, so it might have been that way
Which is even worse
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>>5508060
Never doubt the logic of the weird!
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>>5508068
Let us press on!
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>>5508072
After all, we must know how it ends!
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>>5508074
Some of you may know this one from an earlier thread.
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>>5500946
o/ She's a brick,Da na na na, House0 o/
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>>5508077
I think this one covers the logic of 4chan in spades, or at least the good part of 4chan...
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>>5508079
Anyone else hate captchas?
>>
>>5508081
Nothin' to say here...move along...
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>>5503470
...I don't think I get this one
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>>5508082
And thus we have reached the end of this sudden dumping.
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>>5507686
Could be
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>>5508087
I really want a calico
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>>5508084
The flash from her camera looks like the light on the Thing's head.
I had to look at it again just now to get it myself.
>>
>>5508084
Bless your heart.
>>
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>>5501367

You are the best person. Sauce on gif maker?
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>>5508109
Shit. Stupid ass me forgot to look down, disregard that I suck cocks.
>>
>>5508113
Those better be girl cocks, anon.
>>
>>5508087
>Various glocks
I /k/eked
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>>5508085
The artstyle in this somehow really reminded me of Death Note.
>>
>>5506933
>>5507415
>>
>>5506432
Well see, that just means that we can imagine any kind of lips we want, and thus it has the best dick-sucking lips.
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>>5508797
Well damn. Want to try screencap that, but the inline image expansion doesn't work for me.
>>
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>>5508797
>>5508803
Oh wait nevermind.
>>
>>5500966
82.

I feel horrible.

And lonely. All I do is fap.
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>>5508804
The plot thickens.
>>
>>5506313
>>5508852
7 years (minus a week), the legend rises anew.

>captcha
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>>5508852
I knew it would rise again...it was only a matter of time...
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>>5508804
>>5508852
>>5508861
>>5508916

History... is bound to repeats itself
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>>5508087
>WA-2000
>Slavshit
I don't get it, what's the premise of this /k/ joke?
>>
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>>5503315
That's glorious. The comedic spirit of /d/ is alive and well.
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>>5508945
I guess being dead fucking wrong?
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>>5500966
46. But mostly the tamest ones.
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>>5503849
I'm dying
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>>5508945
Bless your heart.
>>
>>5508087
Calling and AUG a FAMAS. FAmas being my country weapon i feel ofended. Srsly. I dont even like gun and is happy it's forbiden to own one in my country BUT FOR SHAME ANON ;_;
>>
>>5508999
Saving
>>
>>5509184
>offended on 4chan
>doesn't know /k/ joke
>waves white flag when attacked
Enjoy your w(h)ine and baguette faggot
>>
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>first time seeing futa.
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>>5509184
Bless your heart.
>>
>>5508092
>>5509078
>>5509201
Are you a middle-aged Southern woman, or did this somehow become a meme while I was out?
>>
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>>5508852
>>
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>>5509233
I love this artist. Shame about the censoring
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>>5509220
Bless your heart.
>>
does anyone have a screencap of the thread where someone posts a pic of a pregnant loli getting fucked, and then someone replies with Mother of God - and then someone says 'is that a request?'
>>
>>5505679
37
decent
>>
>>
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>>5508087
>calls an AUG a FAMAS
>can't identify based snipper riffle
>LOL MOIST NUGGETS
>LEL GLOCKNADES
>DEEEEGL BRAND DEEEEGLE
>AM I KOMMANDO YET
>>
>>5510811
Lighten up fagtron it's obviously a joke
>>
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>>5510811
>Not understanding /k/ memes
>Talking about /k/
>>
>>5504840
High Essence sex in Exalted.
>>
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This thread is going places.
Specifically, >>>/k/
>>
>>5500966
44. I think we could create a better list though, even if it was still just for masturbating; there's a lot of cross over and a few repeats, and a bunch of them are just stupid.

But, as a real deviant, I'd love to see at least a few actual sex acts on there. Trans partners, multiple partners, toys, BDSM, roleplay... there's plenty of options.
>>
I love this place so much...the people, the energy, the hentai...so lively...
>>
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>>5511163
>Lively
Heh
>>
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>>5511232
Well, okay it's not lively, but...I forgot what point I was trying to make...
>>
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>>5511301
It's like being in that sort of cozy relationship where you don't talk just for the sake of talking, but we still share smiles and winks?
>>
>>5511301
Now that is one damn fine piece of work. I think this cap is relevant for it.
>>
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>>5511304
I would like to think so, we don't need to speak to be understood, for we are all here for a common reason.
>>
>>5508085
That is one smooth motherfucker
>>
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>>5511372
One day, I wish to learn his secrets.
>>
>>5505679
74
>>
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My personal favourite
>>
>>5508026
Is that Freddie from Cromartie?
>>
>>5508852
The Saga Continues
>>
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There's an inordinate amount of jet porn I could post in response to all this talk of /k/, but jet porn is always deleted.

That makes me sad.

And the pic has nothing to do with these words.
>>
>>5507284
REMAINDER THREE...
>>
>>5510978
Why-
I-i...

Fuck it. I don't care anymore...
>>
>>5500966
I once fapped in the back trunk of the family car while my parents were driving, and my siblings were in the second row. Is there an achievement for that?
>>
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>>5500966
22 if my 3DS counts for Technology
>>
>>5511498
>In the trunk
What.
>>
>>5511454
You mean like this?
>>
>>5508025
Shin what are you doing. You can't crossdress.
>>
>>5509196
? Wha? U WOT M8? Srsly wtf. Am i being racist to your country? This a humor thread. Can i have fun?
>>
>>5507937
This from a VN or something?
>>
>>5511563
It's an edit, she doesn't have the dick.
>>
>>5511604
That said, it is actually a VN
>>
>>5511604
I'm legitimately disappointed that the dick is fake.
>>
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>>5511549
Oh come on, let's just have some fun, these threads never stick around long enough, so let's all enjoy it while we can.
>>
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>>5511610
My friend, that's why I only keep the edited version, it is way more fun.
>>
>>5511624
Do you have the edited version without the text?
>>
>>5511610
She will always have a dick in your memory.
>>
>>5511628
>futanari invading your memory with dicks
New fetish acquired.
>>
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>>5511634
>>
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>>5511627
Sorry, I'm afraid I don't, but if I find it, I'll post it for you. In the mean time, I'll keep posting other content if you'd like.
>>
>>5511640
That sounds fine. Thanks, anon.
>>
>>5511627
>>5511640
If somebody's willing to spend the effort, they could paste the dick back over into the original.
>>
>>5511646
Gonna fuck about with some layers in GIMP, I'll see what I can do.
>>
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>>5511634
Does this tickle your fancy then?
>>
>>5511634
For the past week, every time I post, someone gets a new fetish.
I think I might have super powers.
>>
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>>5511651
>GIMP
>layers
...I just went and did it in fucking PAINT.
>>
>>5511653

With great power comes great responsibility.
>>
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>>5511655
I'm using GNU/Linux, gimme a break.
>>
>>5511655
Thank you, I'm not all that good at that sort of thing (I know it's just paint, but I'm still not very good at it), so it would've taken me a while to find it for the anon who asked for it. So thanks again, you really helped me out.
>>
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>>5511658
And thank you too for helping out, even if it took you a little bit longer, you still made the effort, which is more than some people would bother doing.
>>
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Gonna post my favorite funny /d/ comic
>>
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>>
>>5511666
Thanks anon, if there's one thing that I wish to be quoted on once I die, it's:
>A man's porn is a man's pride.
Nice numbers, by the way.
>>
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>>
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>>
>>5511670
...I just have to roll the triple 6 when I'm being nice and thanking someone...
I didn't even notice that until you pointed it out...
Oh well, still a nice roll for what it's worth.
>>
>>
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>>
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>>
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>>
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>>
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>>
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She probably left that frosting undefended so she could have fun with these three master thieves.

all I have from this comic
>>
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>>
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>>
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>>
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>>
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>>
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Every time I watch cosmos, I think of this and chuckle.
>>
>>
>>5511731
>filename
i kek'd
>>
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>>5511717
>>
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>>5511731
That's way better than the filename I have that one saved under...oh well.
>>
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>>5511733
>>5511731

Song is now playing in my head, and Faye is on a solo journey to see where her cooch can take her.
>>
>>5507649
fun fact
fuck reddit
>>
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>>5500966
Well, I know what I'm going to be working on this summer.
>>
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>>5511731

Can someone add the NASA control room celebrating after the curiosity rover landing to the end of this?
>>
>>5511745
Holy shit.
>>
>>5511749
Oh please someone fulfill this wish, that would be a splendid addition to my collection of weird and funny hentai.
>>
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Elves, sheesh
>>5511738
Isn't that a Tyranitar giving the D? Roselia is only a foot tall, Tyranitar is 6
>>5511745
Oh god no, this is my biggest fear
>>
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>>
Gotta keep it rollin'
>>
>>5507686
Nice gold fgt
>>
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>>5511493
>>5510978
>>
>>5511764
Where's that from?
>>
>>5511745
I wish that was my mother
>>
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>>5511833

There was more to that? I remember saving it hearing it was a commission.

On that note...
>>
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Come across this one (NOT literally). Had to pick up my ass from the floor back then.
>>
>>5511996
I look forward to the day when the rape horse scene gets animated. Good stuff
>>
Also, there's this. Didn't want to post it originally, since it's not funny enough to make your jaw (or jaws? I mean... this is /d/ after all...) come off, but seeing as an anon classified it as positively humurous, I might as well post it here.
>>
>>5511950
That wasn't a commission, it was a /d/rawthread request that got twisted.

Speaking of commissioners

>>5511739
You reminded me that this thread
http://archive.foolz.us/co/thread/37922025/
happened.

Image very related.

I went to cap it, but I could only get the cap down to 4.14MB so I can't post it.
>>
>>5507981
>>
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>>5500966
50. This is what happens when I have long periods away from my SO.
>>
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>>5512083
Stop showing off your lovers, I've just started enjoying my loneliness
>>
I know scat isn't allowed, but GODDAMNIT! I need a new pair of sides now...
>>
>>5512031
I wonder how a metal slime feels.
Probably cool and hard, but still yielding.
Something like living mercury, all clean and shiny.
>>
>>5505944
59.
>>
>>5511745
Thats gold
>>
>>5507248
GET THE FUCK OUT
GET THE FUCK OUT JAR JAR
>>
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>>5512095
But anon-kun, real dicks are so much better than imaginary ones.
>>
>>5504791
I like you.
>>
>>
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>>5511301
>That's my kink but I'm not gay, she's got tits to it's okay
Holy shit this one, my sides.
>>
>>5511232
I have aspergers. This is me.
>>
>>5511764
>Pounding a brown-skinned elf in the ass
This is my new fetish.
>>
I just want to say, I frequent /b/ as well, and /d/ humor threads blow ylyl threads out of the water every time. Thank you, guys.
>>
>>5511745
I bet the guy who posted that was getting off on the humiliation that his mom knew he loved girls with cocks.
>>
>>5511769
I'm interested in finding the pictures posted in that thread.
>>
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Easily one of the best moments I have had on /int/.

"How do you remove Kebab? Become a shemale!"
>>
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>>
Does anyone have the image where there are monsters and they act like they're not going to rape a bunch of elves, but then totally do anyway?
>>
>>5511459
Ah the good ol days when we only had 5 digits.
>>
>>5512095
My boner and sides are in orbit
>>
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>>
>>5512096
Eh, don't worry about the rules, this thread is home, so go ahead and take off your shoes, sit down wherever you like, and enjoy yourself.
>>
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>>5512842
Now we are doing science bitch!
>>
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>>
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>>
>>5500966
29. I'm most proud of "The Good Student".
>>
>>5512519
Wait, that wasn't your fetish before?
>>
>>5512938
that actually pretty adorable
hope thats not cum tho
that would kind of ruin it for me
>>
>>5512942
Nono, it's totally porridge
>>
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>>5512713
>>
>>5511459
pleeeeeeeeeese post jet porn, love to see some new stuff
>>
>>5513075
Is this what you want?
>>
When cute meets cute, the struggle reaches a new dawn~
>>
>>5513200
Dat exhaust
>>
I have no idea what I'm doing, but who cares!?
>>
>>5508085
>>5508082
>>5508081
>>5508079
>>5508077
>>5508074
>>5508072
>>5508068

It's annoying at how logical this whole exchange is, and yet if anyone attempted this in real life they'd be hit with a sexual assault lawsuit or some shit.
>>
>>5510731
>>5510733
Man, I wish I could afford to be bored in a room full of a lesbian orgy. Like, it happens so often the magic is lost on me, like the landscape at work. Everyone who drives by is like "Wow that looks amazing" and I'm just all "Meh" because I see it eight hours a day.
>>
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>>
>>5511769
That sounds like a neat /d/ and /v/ crossover thread idea. Not that /v/ would ever go for it.
>>
>>5501367
No goo!

And no tentacles either!

What is this?!
>>
>>5512055
>I went to cap it, but I could only get the cap down to 4.14MB so I can't post it.
What are you saving it as? PNG is the best at doing screencaps due to being flat colours. If you are doing png and it's still too big, then maybe try uploading it to somewhere else, see if somebody has a better compressing soft?
>>
>>5503858
More? Please god above more.
>>
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>>5513075
Jet porn has been around for years, then it got big and mods deleted every thread about it.

http://youtu.be/Oi4Ty4XaWWM
>>
>>5514083
As a PNG it was 6.60mb, then I saved it as a JPEG and it became 4.14mb

Then scaling the JPEG down to 99% of it's original size got me this which I can actually post here.
>>
>>5514260
While it hurts the colors, .gif's that are just 1 frame also take fuckall space
>>
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>>5514263
I actually tried converting the PNG to a gif, but the size then ballooned to over 9mb.

>>5513075
Here's another cap from /k/ talking about jet porn, among other things.
>>
>>5514280
>furries

I puked a little in my mouth. /k/ truly is terrible.
>>
And so the thread reaches the twilight hours of its life, let us all take this time and think about the fun we had here. This is our thread, and no one can take that from us. This is a place for all boards to flock and fap to, whether you hail from /v/, /k/, /s4s/, /f/, /gif/, or even /b/, anyone from anywhere may attend and find a home in /d/'s humor thread. Humor is a what we all need in our lives, so let's do what we can to keep that piece of our lives intact. As long as we have things to post, this thread will return and rise again and, once it has lived, it shall die as we all must one day do. So enjoy yourselves everyone, because this shall soon come to a close.
>>
/d/: Where poets, pervs and jokers meet
>>5514523
This is beautiful.
>>
>>5514523
fag
>>
>>5512794
I hate this kind of humour.

>"nerds" can't do shit they love for fun, fuck no!
>everything you do must be attractive to girls!
>stupid "nerds" having fun in a different way than I do...
>>
>>5514536
>>5514552
See? This is the diversity I love to see! We can think whatever we want and our choices are entirely fine, because /d/ is not just about hentai, /d/ is freedom! You can hate me, love me, you can violate and corrupt, or you can spread joy and appreciate. We aren't just limited to this either, there is so much more we can do. Enjoy everyone, for I know I have~
>>
>>5514580
I am going to shitpost so much just to piss you off
>>
>>5514523
<Sniff!> <Sniff!> Oh Cedric! Hold me!

Germane, hand me a tissue!

Tito! Stop that fightin'!

<Waaaaah!>
>>
>>5514558
Actually, it's different for Nerds...

They get boners from playing with the technology and not from thinking about geek points with girls.

It's only later at the D&D convention when they get trapped by a fat chick who lets them impregnate her (so that she has a guaranteed life of luxury) that the real world starts to impinge...
>>
>>5514620
I am a "nerd" you twat. Also there's no such thing as a "D&D convention".
>>
don't you die on me
Thread replies: 337
Thread images: 186
Thread DB ID: 1804



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