What do you unironically order at a bar?

>>7360245
A long island iced tea. I think it's got the most alcohol, and I'm not paying all that money to not even get a buzz.

>>7360245
Your death

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>>7360245
A shot and a beer, faggot.

>>7360250
same

one bourbon, one scotch, one beer

Cider or a whiskey sour

Water

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A water

>>7360245
>What do you unironically order at a bar?

I neither unironically, nor ironically order anything at a bar.

>>7360247
Unless the bartender is a fucking moron a Long Island shouldn't be more than 2 oz of booze.

>a burger
>Many Yuenglings
>usually 1 or 2 of the craft beers my friends get
>maybe some Wild Turkey

Bloody mary with a grainbelt chaser

Gin & tonic usually. Gin is so fascinating

>>7360245

I order a delicious refreshing coke which I drink ironically, then order some fancy stupid 30 year old whiskey that tastes like burning unironically to look cool.

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Duke's and a sweet tea.

A glass of their top shelf bourbon with a teaspoon of water

>>7360283
This or a whiskey sour.
Old Fashioned if i'm feeling fancy.

>>7360271
more like 2.5 oz which should be about the same as the other stuff.

miller lite

>>7360271
In other words, you don't know what a long island ice tea is.

>>7360245
PBR and a Jameson

Typically a bourbon on rocks. My local bar has Buffalo Trace as their well, which I'm a huge fan of. Either BT or Pendleton. Rocks, if I want to mix it up with iced tea and lavender/honey simple syrup.

>>7360245
Natty Light. It's a dollar a can where I go.

Anywhere else, I tend to do crown and 7.

>>7360271
Where I go, a long island is a 6 shot well liquor drink with a splash of cola for color.

>>7360271

you're fucking retarded

>>7360245
Does that mean that you actually... ironically order certain drinks? People do that?

>>7360352
Unless you're getting charged up the ass no bar is going to let their bartenders pour out a shitload of booze like that, alternatively they could be seedy as fuck and be watering down the alcohols.

For a normal LIIT 2 oz is appropriate. 3 oz or beyond kills the drink, you know unless you actually enjoy just drinking a shitload of alcohol with a splash of SS and Coke.

>>7360380
this is incorrect

>>7360377
Yeah, I have friends who order shit like whiskey neat, old fashioned, and white russian because they think it makes them look classy.

>>7360380
Don't even get me started, I know that I'm retarded, but shouldn't tea be a part of Long Island iced tea?

>>7360380
http://www.liicetea.com/

Your sour, and the coke are the only non-alcoholic ingredients in a long island.

>>7360396
No

>>7360398
>robert butt
>rosebud

>crediblesource.net

>>7360396
>but shouldn't tea be a part of Long Island iced tea?

Nope. It's called that because the combination of liquors involved end up tasting like iced tea once the drink is completed.

>>7360392
Man, that kind of thinking sounds like they've seen too many liquor commercials.

Gin and Tonic.
Whiskey with ice.
Brandy.

Beer at home when in jaccuzi.

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>mfw all these mixed drinks

>>7360403
Look in any other drink guide then, aspie. I'm not going to sit here all day burning strawmen.

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martini
my friend gives me shit for "trying to be james bond", but ive had a thing for them since i played bubble bobble years ago.

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>>7360407
>mfw they drink a lot of dos equis and sam adams

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>>7360410
>e cig

Fag

High Life

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>>7360289
>I order a delicious refreshing coke
tfw student bar sells a pint of perfectly carbonated and sweetened coke for £1 but im at the age where i gotta start watching my sugar intake

>>7360408
maybe instead of a toothpick umbrella we can get you a little toothpick fedora.

Beer, gin & tonic, or martini

Don't get fancy or all frou-frou, you want to be able to feel the hooch

"Gin martini straight up with olives"

Before every dinner

>>7360361
>BT as well
Must be nice.
Old crow and an old German for 5 bucks is my usual since I'm poor as fuck and need a lot. Also bring a bottle from home for when I'm going between bars

whatever beer looks alright, draught if im thirsty, bottled if there's something exciting.

I buy one beer I haven't had before, the rest is the cheapest I can get. Fat Tire was okay.

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>>7360426
>tfw almost all of the smokers in my working class dive bar, with 1 dollar canned beer has switched to vaping because they can do it inside when it's cold as fuck here.

Hell, even I, a pack a day Camel Wides smoker, switched to a box mod. The whole bar looks like it's in a London fog.

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draft beer, V.O., couple few rocks

fucking sublime

fucking shit. ive been bartending for four years. a typical drink is between 1.25 and 1.5 oz liquor. Long islands are usually 2-2.5 oz. Just like restaurants have recipes for their food, they also have recipes for drinks, so every place is different.

>>7360398
That sounds like an awful Long Island and I would never serve that, I go by IBA standards which basically is:

1/2 oz each of Vodka, Gin, Rum, Tequila, and Triple Sec

Topped with more or less equal parts Sweet & Sour Mix and Coke.

Now look I guess there are bartenders who will give you a shot of each liquor which tastes like crap and put you in an instant stupor. I'd rather you drink one and get you buzzed nicely, two if you insist on getting drunk. Just keep in mind unless you're paying the money for Call liquor we'll be mixing you the cheap shit, and the cheap shit indeed sends you into a worse hangover the next day.

A Manhattan. Then I ask what I did to deserve such a flat and flavourless Manhattan.

>>7360460
>Now look I guess there are bartenders who will give you a shot of each liquor which tastes like crap and put you in an instant stupor.
If you drink it all in one gulp like it's some kind of big shot.
and yes, I ask for bottom shelf at my place. She charges me half price too.

>>7360247
Have you never been to a bar? The price of a cocktail increases in proportion to the amount of spirits in it.

>>7360472
Long Island is all well liquor so they're pretty cheap. The blacks order them all the time

>>7360461
At least they know what it is. I ordered one at the most recent bar I went to, and had to walk her through making it.

>>7360460
I'm >>7360398
It's a drink served at happy hour at dive bars around here. It's meant to get you fucked up fast. Off happy hour pricing at my dive is 6$ This is well liquor in a place that sells Natty and PBR cans for 1 dollar, and mixed middle shelf shots for 3.50.

It also helps that the almost everyone in the bar on most nights is a regular. It's damned near a club, and tehy pour strong for the regulars. The typical bartenders are both owners, so if they want to get us fucked up fast, who's going to complain. It's still a damned tasty drink at that strength. They pour a similar strength Fishbowl at the same price.

at bars I usually get a bourbon and sour or two followed by enough beers to keep me buzzed throughout the night. Depending on the bar I might get a single malt neat but that's usually my drink of choice at home.

>>7360245
Beer, gin and tonic, whisky, mixed drinks recommended by the bartender, the drink of the girl I'm talking to do I can talk to her about the drink, etc.

Beer usually.

I go for Blue Moon, Boulevard, or Grain Belt if it's on tap.

If I'm at a place with lots of different beer on tap I'll try something new.

Tito's vodka on the rocks.

Best part is I can switch over to water at any time and nobody will notice.

Cocktails are for people with immature palates. 90% of them are just ways of adding sugar to your booze.

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>>7360623

gawd what a stupid aspie post

>>7360623
here's your reply

>>7360245
monster energy drinks and anything over 80 proof.
accept no less.

>>7360410
A survey of hundreds of parents in the St. Louis area has found WHATT??!!!

>not being a regular who overtips and in return the bartenders makes your drinks strong as fuck and gives you free shots ever now and then

>>7360434
Student bar, as in, campus bar? Is it also a restaurant?

Here in clapistan I've never been to a bar that a tender wouldn't just pour you a coke for free and take the next order or go back to wiping down the bar. Bar/restaurant that serves burgers and fries and has a kids menu? Sure. Bar as in pub? Not once. Not never.

I think it's like a metaphorical head-nod to sober drivers that go there so they can at least blend in and sip on a virgin coke while staying sober & getting their friends home safe. It's a nice gesture, but the least they could do, considering how much the sober persons friends are spending on well drinks, and that person is making sure the repeat customers get home safe...

>>7360623
moron

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>>7360426
It's actually part of an /o/ meme brah

Vaping goes with the stance lifestyle

>>7360259
alright george

Grand castel rouge

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>>7360245
>going to a bar unironically

jesus christ what's wrong with you

>>7360623
Adding bitters is literally the opposite of adding sugar

>>7360723
>doing things you don't enjoy just for le irony
more like what's wrong with you

>>7360245
I'll usually look through the beer list. if they have something interesting that I haven't seen, or something I'm in the mood for I'll go for that.

If the beer list isn't good or I'm feeling uninspired, I'll get a well bourbon on the rocks.

>>7360769
I get enjoyment out of the irony. It's like how some people can enjoy watching B-movies. I don't mind doing something I would hate genuinely in an ironic sense if it gives me entertainment.

>>7360777
is that how you justify sucking dicks without admitting you're gay?

Beer and the occasional cider.

>>7360370
You'd be surprised how many places just mix rum and vodka together, fill the rest up with lemon iced tea, and call it a long island.

I haven't had a real long island in years.

>>7360292
Love dukes. 904 by any chance? I probably visit their brewery/bar once a month.

>>7360245
Schooner of beer. It's hard to get shots these days where I live (nanny state).

If I'm extra keen on getting fucked up, I'll get two cokes with two shots worth in them each.

>>7360777
Shove your dick in a blender then

Pitcher of molson

>>7360260
Where do you drink that stocks lemon juice? All the bars near me are dives that hate serving any cocktail more complicated than a Manhattan.

[spoiler]You'd better put an egg white in yours, faggot.[/spoiler]

>>7360245
Ice water. It's free so i can hangout for free bascially. I just say i'm the designated driver.

>>7360723
I like to try cocktails before I buy the ingredients to make them at home.

>>7360283
>>7360408
my niggas.

G&T or a whiskey ginger is my jam. sometimes the bartender im friends with will hook us up with some tasty shots. i especially like klondikes, which after googling ive noticed aren't actually a thing. maybe he just made up the recipe. guy worked in the virgin islands at a fancy bar for a while. tastes like mint ice cream

>>7360275
my friend

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>>7360343
What the fuck are you on about nigger.

A typical drink will have 1 - 1.5 fl oz of liquor in it, with maybe a quarter oz of discrepancy depending on the bartender.

Thats why a 1 - 1.5 oz shot of rail liquor typically has the same cost as a rail drink.

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I order Gin on the rocks.

Sometimes I order Tokyo Teas when Im at a party.

>>7360245
a jug of whatever is on tap

>current year
>having a regular order
>not living in a hipster city where every bar has a varied and high quality cocktail list

flyover af in here

>>7361064
I live in wisconsin, the guys poor my drink before I even sit down.

Gin and tonic.

I get weird looks for some reason. Shits good, man.

>>7361064
>flyover af in here

Thank God. Hopefully we'll run off you useless NYC and LA fucks soon.

>can I get a dark and stormy?
>what's that / I don't have what I need to make it
>r-rum and coke then

This happens to me far too much.

>>7361081
Im this
>>7361056


Gin is awesome.
Eventually you might get sick of the tonic flavor, just switch to club.

Eventually you will just hate everything but gin and become a cranky bastard who just drinks it straight.

A Manhattan

Bud light

:^)

>>7360472
No it's not, it's proportional to how expensive the liquor they use for it is and how long it takes for them to make it.

Like >>7360487 said, most places use well liquor for their long islands so they're gonna be pretty cheap

>>7360245
JaegerBombs. Otherwise I just drink the cheapest tap.

>>7361095
I don't actually care for tonic so it helps me drink slower for social gatherings when I'm not trying to get shit faced. If I'm drinking to get drunk I mix with club or cut to the chase and do car bombs.

>>7361094
Aren't the ingredients for a Dark and Stormy cheap enough to just make them at home?

>>7360245

Champagne

Gin & soda

Or tanqueray 10 with ice

or PBR or Miller Lite

or a taste of a local craft pint

>>7361094
what kind of bars are you going to that don't even have ginger beer

>>7361114
It's hard to find good ginger beer some places. The ginger beer usually costs more than the alcohol, since you can just get a $13 bottle of Cruzan Blackstrap but a 4 pack of good ginger beer is like $6

>>7360245
Hey bartender! I'll take a double reverse seared east congo chocolate lambaste green oregon barrel aged IPA.

A Gibson.

>>7361121
Goslings does the trick just fine.

I'll have a VB thanks.

>>7360392
>tfw Mad Men made me scared to order Old Fashioneds

>I'd like a beer
>Which beer?
>*runs away*

>>7361213
>Old Fashioneds

Seriously? Please do not embarrass your fellow Americans.

Depends on what's in my wallet, what kind of bar it is, and how drunk I want to be.

If I'm feeling good and I'm at a nice place I ask for a whiskey old-fashioned or a whiskey sour.

At a cheaper, cozier place I'll take a beer and a shot of bourbon.

>>7360445
Damn dude. With Buffalo being the well, it's $5 per. Pendleton is only $6 where I live. Plus, knowing the people that own it, they'll order me a bottle for their cost when I ask.

Also, any one else like Buillet? Their Rye and Bourbon are both amazing.

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>>7361154
My black acquaintance.

rum n coke for getting hammered
whiskey for shots with guys
fireball for shots with girls
yuengling for cheap beer
sierra nevada pale ale if they have it

>>7360245
a black and tan

>>7360380
I do a fast 3 count on all liquors except gin which gets a 2. 3 count on SnS and a splash of coke. Its $6.

>>7360250
same

>>7360701
found the pleb

Well whiskey and coke or well vodka and cranberry juice.

Beer
Jack Daniels and Lemonade
Tequila Sunrise

White Russian

Don't judge me, it's tasty as fuck

>>7360245
lager and chips

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>>7361587

*tips cardigan*

Tullamore Dew neat and then i take it like a shot

>>7361595
that's clearly a bathrobe

Just whatever the passable local lager is. Occasionally a double Wild Turkey neat if I'm drinking away my sorrows.

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>>7361277
>Their Rye and Bourbon are both amazing.
Their bourbon is good (especially the 10 yo), their rye is anemic, but a good starter rye.

I used to love the shit out of it, got my local liquor store to start carrying it. Don't know if I drank too much of it or what, but it pales in comparison to better ryes. Knob Creek makes a very good rye for the money.

Two cold vodkas and a lager beer, all of the cheapest alcohol-for-dollar variety available.

Depends where I am. My favorite good bar I will get whatever the craft special is. My favorite sitty bar I get Yuengling.

>>7361678
WTF is a "favorite good bar?"

Do you have a favorite bad bar?

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>pint of ____, mate
where ____ is probably coopers, little creatures, or a stout.

>>7360930
I go to a tiny independently owned cafe/bar/bakery so they always have lemon and lime juice on hand, and you better fuckin believe I get an egg white in it

Bar I want to work/make connections: Cocktails
Any other bar: Draft beer or Jameson
Home: Scotch, cognac, rye, gin etc

>>7360245

Shot of fernet, whatever beer they have thats bitter and cold.

Baring fernet because, you know, normal bar, four roses yellow.

>>7360245
Bulleit Old Fashoned or Makers 'n Soda

Or a dark beer

>>7361724
>Old Fashoned
Beat yourself about the face, groin, chest, neck and head.

Afterward, learn to spell simple words.

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>>7361121
>making a dark and stormy with anything other than Black Seal

>>7361726
>Missing an "I" keystroke = not knowing how to spell

Also there is literally nothing wrong with Old Fashioneds

>>7361624
Hows the speyburn? It can be had here for under 30€, Ive been eyefucking it lately.

Whatever's cheapest.

It's usually PBR. I long ago stopped giving a shit.

>>7360245
Hoegaarden

>>7360417
I've learned to not get the olive garnish in most bars. Last time I got three bad tasting olives. Towards the end the drink tasted like old olive brine.

>>7360245
>unironically
What? Why can't I just fucking order a drink? Why does this shit need a prefix?

Anyway, rum and coke

>>7360247
This.
If you are looking to get drunk, order a few of these. Every place makes them slightly different though, so make sure your bar of choice makes them nice and strong.

When I was in college, the cheapest and rowdiest bar in town was the bar in the Executive Lodge motel. We'd go every Thursday night, because it was karaoke night, and they had good drink specials. The girls who worked in the bar were all college girls, and they couldn't have given a shit about what they were doing, and the bartender was a middle aged woman who also didn't give a shit. I ordered a Long Island one night, and the girl came back with a pitcher with a bendy straw sticking out of it and said "Well, we didn't have the right glass for it, so she just put it in a pitcher. If it's not strong enough, I'll bring you a few shots." Of course I said it wasn't strong enough. That was a good night........

A shot of Jamison and a pint of blue buck

kraken

>>7360245
carlsberg because it's the cheapest beer in the pub, and I'm not there to enjoy fine ales

I was going to say that it's very uncommon for anyone to go to a bar and order something ironically, but the last handful of dozens of time I've gone out I made sure to get drunk first, so probably ended up ordering things ironically despite myself.

Only thing that comes to mind was a neon pink guava wheat something or other.

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Blue Moon for beer, Black Russian for mixed drink.

Double vodka water

Pub: Beer 90% of the time. Usually an ale I haven't tried before, if not something standard (Doombar/London Pride/Youngs Special/Ghost Ship). Sometimes a guiness or czech lager.

Bar: beer or G&T, or Vodka & Tonic.

>>7361731
>being a slave to foreign trademarks

I bet you make Moscow Mules in that stupid copper mug, too.

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Abortions

>>7362926
Blue moon?

Why not just get a wine cooler?

I disagree. My beard is longer, and my Fedora is a Guinness ball cap.

Guld Tuborg and fernet shots, it's alright with studentbar pricing.

Scotch and Soda
Mix of macro and microbrews
Whiskey Sour

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A beer or two on tap that I've never heard of, has an interesting name, and I double check isn't an IPA.

>>7361043
The standard long Island iced tea calls for five different liqours. By the IBA recipe you'll end up with about 2.5 FL Oz. If your bar is only giving you 1.5 in a mixed drink you're generally getting ripped off.

Who rye and ginger here?

depends what is on special. if nothing is really worth it then draft miller lite. sometimes ill get a few shots of fireball in between. i drink on a budget at the bar. between tips and the prices its not worth it to splurge to look cool.

How the fuck do you "unironically" order something?

straight dark rum

>>7360370
most places don't do it like this anymore (plus sour mix) because its basically illegal. the only place ive been to that makes them insanely strong anymore is the casinos in atlantic city.

>>7361683
>any year
>not having a favorite bad bar
But, seriously, there are different kinds of bars upscale and downscale, and sometimes one sounds good and sometimes another.

I order a coke.

After a while at least it looks like a dark ale.

I usually have a beer handed to me as I sit down. Typically go for browns and medium hop IPAs. When getting mixed drinks long islands or whatever they feel like making.

It's good to make friends with bartenders.

>>7363385
By doing it without a trace of irony.

>>7360283
This is a good choice because it's usually pretty cheap.

Getting drunk off liquor is so fucking expensive. I'll have one drink to be social, but usually I just drink beer if I plan on getting drunk while out, and then maybe a boilermaker or something for fun.

I usually make cocktails at the house.

What would yall recommend that's really lemony?

>>7363722
Lemon lime and bitters. Careful not too get hammered on them too quickly.

But, seriously, if you want to get tipsy as well just ask them to add a shot of vodka to it.

>>7361113
>car bombs
Literally this.

Black & Tan

Guinness or yuengling

I don't give a fuck

>>7363455
>It's illegal
The fuck are you on about? Every long island I've ever had has between 5 and 6 1.5 shots of alcohol in them.

>>7363738
How do you even get drunk off yuengling

>>7363744
Drink a lot of it.

Or you don't get drunk and just enjoy it because it tastes good.

>>7360642
>go to a bar with a bunch of friends and my ex
>my ex is a waitress and overtips on even shitty service
>shes tipping him 4 dollars on 5-6 dollar drinks
>gets 3 of them
>he gives her a free tall vodka soda
>wont shut up about that is why she tips so much
"but you paid for like 2 more drinks in tips, so it wasnt really "free""
>calls me a cheap asshole

>>7363747
I think your body processes yuengling faster than you can drink it.

>>7361121
Trader Joes has decent ginger beer 4$ for a 4pack.

A pint of best.

>>7363763
What is that anyway? I've only heard it on TV, never in real life. I'm guessing it's the most "premium" beer

Beer, soda, water or daikiri
Maybe vodka

>sober alcoholic (so no booze for me)
>fructose intolerance (no soft drinks either)
Just a mineral water for me, thanx.

>>7363781
>fructose intolerance
lol, are we pretending this is a real thing?

>>7363804
>LOOK AT HOW IGNORANT I AM
>LOOK AT ME AND LAUGH
gg

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>>7360245
Drinks; sometimes food

Whatever tap beer looks best

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I know a place that serves dozens of interesting beers but every time I go I always end up ordering the same 3

>>7363730
Is there anything with actual alcohol?

>>7364396
Lemon lime and bitters with vodka has alcohol. The alcohol is vodka (and also bitters, but that's not significant).

Or else go for a whiskey sour.

>>7364407
I mean, I got that, I kinda meant something that has alcohol in it by default. Sounds a bit weird to order basically a mocktail, with vodka.

>>7360245
irish coffee, tequila shots, or jamesons and coke

>>736038
Nigga, you dumb.

>>7364415
Tom Collins, faggot

or G+T with lemon

A beer. Usually a Modelo or PBR. In the summer I like to get a margarita on the rocks with salt. I don't drink liquor much, because I'm an alcoholic.

My favourite drink to order ironically is an AMF (adios, mother fucker). It's expensive, tastes like garbage and is hilariously trashy. I don't even drink it, I just leave it on a table outside and wait to see if someone will steal it.

Rye and diet

>>7363722
Champaign and lemoncello is pretty good.

Diet coke, no ice please bartender.

>>7360245
I'll have a beer, please.

>>7360245
The strongest drink you have, and a kamikaze.

>>7360245
A Zombie if they have the ingredients.

>>7360250
This tbqh. Leave the shot if I still plan to get shit done the morning after.

>>7360245
>vodka tonic, tall, double, shit ton of limes please
>well is fine.

>>7360245
Irish car bomb

Whatever the special is.

hot wings and a pitcher of the cheapest beer pls

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>>7360245
Whatever scotch I'm feeling on the rocks if the place doesn't suck. Also, rarely, the house mixers can be alright (tried a few at magianno's in chitown a few weekends ago they were great).

Whatever shit macro they have on tap (Coors and PBR are the go tos) if it does suck.

Moscow mules, old fashions, manhattans, and 7&7s if I'm feeling one of them and the bartender can actually make a fucking drink right

Shots of irish if I lose a bet (usually pool games)

Carbombs/tequila shots if I'm on in the rare mood to get devastated at the bar and can handle a $100+ tab.

Always pay cash and tip as you go people. Treat the bartender right and they will reciprocate if they know whats up.

>>7363743
there's such a thing as drink limits now. you can't serve people more than X amount of alcohol in a single drink. it's a smart move

>>7366254
Seasoned bartenders or ones that know you don't give a shit. At the local townie haunt I hit we got 3$ jack and cokes that are 80% jack.

>>7360642
>tipping extra money
>for free shots

I don't think you know what free means

>>7366280
cool

>>7366321
I'm just saying tip right and pay as you go, what goes on with your drink are between you the barkeep and the wall.

What a dumb law its completely unenforceable.

>>7366325
agreed. but I never said it was a law, just that it's basically illegal. I come from a college town maybe I'm influenced

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>>7366327
I do too, but don't hit the shitshow party bars full of fraggots. Go find those hole in the wall townie haunts where the bartenders will remember your face when you go there a few times a month.

Also, $5 glenfiddich 12 at the main one I go to. No idea how they stay in business.

>>7360275
Indubitably. Minnesota does have it perks.

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>>7360461
I see what you did there

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I think the lesson we can all take away from this thread is that townie bars rule.

>>7360354
PB&J my friend

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Jameson on the rocks into a couple of V.O.'s and 7 to get drunk, switch to smithwicks to maintain, Near closing time get BOD with rum and cokes.

I also drink too much.

>>7360245
angry balls

>>7360245
>" what do you have non alcoholic with lemon inside?"
>"ok, I'll take that, can I also have a lemon half crown-cut with it?"

I never get the lemon, or sometime just a slice. my friend thinks I'm joking but I'd really appreciate it. I mean, if I have to pay 10$ to buy some sprinkled lemon water I might get spoiled a bit as well, no?

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>>7366975
>ten dollars for a non acoholic drink.

Fuck where do you live nyc?

>>7360245
Op I want to smash you in the face with a bat

>>7366987
Rome (Italy), every fucking pub has overpriced drinks.

>>7363922
sounds about right... that all looks shitty.

I'm not even sure when the last time I drank was, it's been probably a couple of years. However, a Manhattan is my go-to for really hard stuff. A gin and tonic can be good; same with a whiskey sour. Rum and coke or whiskey and coke as a last resort.

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>>7360245
Gimme your top shelf

>>7360245
Late reply, but gin and ginger ale.

Magners, Guinness, or a Granville Island Winter Ale if its around
cocktails wise, Old Fashioned, Long Island, or really whatever specials on that doesnt look like shit

>>7360247
Best thing

Vodka and Coke on the rocks. I call it a "Cold War."

>can i just have a mineral water, please?
>barlady gives disapproving look to discourage non-drinkers because the profit is in the alcohol
>actually, scratch that. make it tap water instead (because fuck you)

>>7367619
i shouldnt be judging you for this, but vodka and coke? are you 14, and drinking for the first time?

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>>7367642
Actually I'm a T-totaller I just wanted to play along.

>>7367679
well, you get points in my book for the name

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Depends. I like cheap vodka, so usually shots of those. I like John Dalys, vodka & cranberries, whiskey sours, gin & orange juice. I'm not picky.

Depends on how much I'm drinking. If I'm just getting a few I'll get whatever beer looks good. If I'm really drinking I'll get a shot of cheap shit and whatever my mates are in the mood for.

Depends on what kinda night it is.

Regular night: Whatever ale sounds interesting
Bougie night: Scotch, wine, whatever foofy cocktail sounds neat
Poverty night: PBR, well whisky shots
Everything else: Gin and Tonic

>>7361213
>Mad Men
What? Why?

Whiskey sour?
Uhh.. wine, if it's the type of place to stock wines?
Fuck it, I order what I want.

>>7360271
Guess you've never bartended before, Skippy.

Tom Collins all day every day

>>7360245
rum and coke, and tequila sunrise.

>>7368107
this. fries too, if i'm hungry.

a full lap dance in a private room

$2 beers, Crown and Coke, Vodka tonic, Margaritas on the rocks.

Beer, whiskey, fried food.

Jesus, OP, unironically finger your own butt more.

>>7360245

Triple sec (I prefer cointreau) and lemonade, or even coke. Why? Because inevitably some chick I'm with (I often drink with extended friend groups) will ask what I'm drinking - One offer of a sip later and they're hooked (and usually impressed). Another example is any one of those honey bourbons + lemonade. The best part is both drinks genuinely taste nice if you have a sweet tooth.

You only need half a dozen drinks that are nice and aren't common to make your friends (and anyone you pick up) think you're some kind of connoisseur.

>>7361253

Not that I'm American (anglophone though) - Why would that be embarrassing?

They're rather delicious (and the perfect strength) drinks when done right.

>>7360272

You, sir, clearly know what's best in life.

>>7360272
PA master race

>>7368265
I see nothing about driving his foes before him, or hearing the lamentations of their women.

>>7360271

1.5 cl Tequila
1.5 cl Vodka
1.5 cl White rum
1.5 cl Triple sec
1.5 cl Gin
2.5 cl Lemon juice
3.0 cl Gomme Syrup
1 dash of Cola

Fernet & coke.

Yeah. Make fun of me. I deserve it.

>>7368344
It's delicious. Too bad a lot of bars I've been to don't stock Fernet.

>>7368346

I lived with an Argentine couple for a summer. They hooked me on it.

Apparently it's as normal in Argentina as a Cuba Libre is here.

>>7368362
From what I've read, the Argentine Fernet-Branca has a slightly different recipe than the stuff imported from Italy. Sweeter and less bitter IIRC. Once I got a taste for it, I've really started to like Fernet's bitterness.

>>7360245
gin tonic

>>7368344
Neh, overrated maybe but deserve it
Literally everyone here drink it in their life

>>7361130
Well, we don't make that.

Depends on how I'm feeling. If I want to chat with some friends, usually three or four pints of a lager, a lighter ABV porter or a hefe. If there's a restaurant and I get a some food then something heavier like maybe one or two pints of a heavier IPA/stout.

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>At the bar with my sister and her friends
>Im not drinking because driving
>"Can I have a lime and seltzer?"
>"I dont know what that is"
>"A lime and tonic?"
>"Sorry, I dont know what that is either."
>"Its the same drink"
>mfw I had to explain it to her as "Bubble water and lime juice"
>she added a jigger of grey goose

Why are bartenders retarded?

>>7368601
>her

theres your answer, idiot. is that even a question?
NEXT!

>>7368601
>tonic
>seltzer
>same thing
>le meemee

Did I get trolled?

Rye and coke.

>>7360245
Stout. Beamish usually. Guinness if they don't have it.
If they don't have that, then any cheap lager.

appletini

>>7360245
rusty nails
i fucking hate myself

>>7368272
reporting in

>we are

>>7369331
Besides that.

Depends what kinda bar and what they got.
If they have Chu-Hi and I'm looking to get drunk, that. If I'm looking for a sipping drink I'll get a single malt scotch, Speyside preferred. If I just want a beer, probably something Belgian. If I wanna drink all night, Cider.

>>7360245
A whore

>>7369897
Oh shut the fuck up

Yuengling

Or Red Bull + Vodka, or Gin + Tonic.

Seagram's 7 with 7-Up

Crown royal, knobbs creek or makers mark on the rocks maybe with dr.pepper or segrams ginger ale if I don't feel like drinking straight.

Depends. I enjoy a dirty vodka memetini, a gin & tonic, or a old fashioned, but I usually stick with the memetini becuase its the hardest to fuck up and I like the taste of the olive juice.

>>7360245
>tfw australia
>liquor is taxed at like 40%

and it is takes by alcohol percentage, so there is no "cheap liquor"; only exeption is half strength grape vodka that masquerades as fortified wine

I am a bartender, and I hate it because nobody orders cocktails because of the price

>>7360245
Strawberry daiquiri

Go ahead call me a faggot, I don't give a shit.

>>7360245
Rum and coke.
With a side of fries.

>a blue oyster
It's the password for letting me through to the poker game in the back room.
There's always a poker game in the back room.

Whiskey sour, Extra sour.

You guys seems to know your drinks. What's a good starter drink for a virgin to alcohol?

>>7370490
I'm a bartender and it's not really so straightforward

it depends on what you're really asking is "I don't drink alcohol, but I want to get drunk"
or
"I don't drink alcohol, but I would like to start enjoying it"
I won't judge, not everyone has to like liquor

if you are asking the first question, and just want alcohol that is pallet-able, cheap whiskey/ dark rum and coke, a "fruit tingle" , midori and lemonade, light rum and fruit juice are all good

if you want to enjoy liquor you will have to explore your personal taste
do you like the "malt" flavour of some beers, or the "bitters"
do you like wine? most people like white wine, but there are a plethora of distinct types
do you like flavored spirits like caracao, contreau, jaeermiester?
do you like neutral spirits like tequila, light rum, vodka etc

>>7361683
Are you kidding? Do you not have favorite dive bars?

>>7363314
Thank you! Every time I get this people say it's so weird.

>>7370490
I'd say beer but I feel like if you just started out drinking strong shit it'd make everything else cake. I'd start drinking at home first though to test your tolerance. you wouldn't want to go to a bar and get sloppy trying drinks

>>7370576
Actually my plan was to go to a strip club by myself and get totally fucking wasted.

>>7370552
this is the most reasonable alcohol-related post I have ever seen on a /ck/ alcohol thread, and I've been shitposting in these threads for almost 10 years. congratulations. although I disagree with "most people like white wine", a lot of people strongly prefer dry red wines when they start drinking. I think it's because dry reds are a little bit easier to not taste like ass on the cheaper side of things, white wine really doesn't become good until you start getting spendy.

>>7361683
well some bars are "good", everything is clean, people are well behaved, everything is expensive

then there are "bad" bars, where you go for loose women, cheap liquor and no risk of being banned if you stick your dick in the tip jar

>>7368179
you're such a fag and don't actually have friends

>>7370579
kek more power to you. there's been sadder men

Black and Tan with a shot of Jameson.

>>7370584
haha well I suspect that has to do with geography

I'm an Australian and our best white wines are sav blancs, probably our post popular after moscato
the savs we make have a very grassy smooth characteristic, even to a large extent in cheaper wines

maybe its just me, I'm not really a wine coniseur, but our reds tend to be unbearably fruity and chalky, very heavy and acidic, or dry, acidic and fruity

it was different overseas, and I suppose the culture is very very different as well

triple shot of black grouse. straight.

>>7370594
I feel the need to defend whoever you're replying to on this count

I don't like either drink, but Cointreau is very popular in asia and agrees on the whole with them much more than beer or wine

if he wants to impress asians, who cares, I picked up Chinese girls by the armful doing this

Whiskey sour, whiskey neat, whiskey on the rocks.

I like whiskey. And I'm not too picky about it, either. Gimme a scotch, gimme a bourbon, rye, doesn't matter, I'll drink it and I'll like it.

>>7360271
Are you fucking stupid?

oh man, and everyone having a go at the anon about the long island ice tea

the drink has 5 spirits, so it's either 5 ounces; or 2.5 ounces if you're making it with half shots

the reasons it ought to be made with half shots are as follows
for the drink to taste right, the volume of the drink has to stay relative to the coke, that amount is a SLASH of cola not a top up

if you top the drink up with cola, aside from ruining the taste by making it too cola heavy (in this bartenders opinion at least) you are increasing the volume of the drink
who cares? well it has to do with the ice ratio in the glass
what ends up happening is the drink gets warm too quickly, the gin and lemon become too prominent in the palate and the ice starts to water it down
all these things are bad.

but you think "none of that happens if I just drink it quickly"; as a bartender I can tell you that this is what people normally do.
what you have there is people drinking 5 ounces of liquor very quickly and not realizing

too often I have seen someone knock back two of them, or even worse finish their friends drinks (because often they are ordered as a round) and get smashed.
which as a bartender is the worst thing you can do, because they cause trouble, leave early, and embarrass themselves

better to make it with half ounces, serve it will less coke so people can actually taste it, serve in a regular sized glass with the right ice meaning the drink stays cold, and not cause yourself a headache by selling 5ounce drinks at all. doing it with half shots means you could also lower the price and get a better margin.

I feel the need to point this all out, because a bar manager who sells long island ice teas like fish bowls is a fool unless they want a wild party island environment at their bar

>>7370552
I leik scotch am i a pleb?

>>7370854
nothing wrong with scotch, it's one of if not the most popular drink worldwide

scotch has a lot of rubbish that's difficult to get your head around before you get into scotch, don't dwell on the science; you want a drink you like not to become a human whiskey encyclopedia

there is the age, region, distillation process etc
and a LOT of false pedigree and assertions

people most often drink scotch:
A. with coke
B. "on the rocks" meaning with ice
C. "neat" meaning plain room temperature in a glass by itself
D. with a splash of good soda (which is a thing and well worth the money)
E. with a splash of water, though I would not recommend this

you say "scotch", but that's only one branch of the whiskey family, there is irish whiskey, bourbon, and a dozen others; some of which a re very different
I would encourage you to try one or two of each because it's easy to see which direction you like your whiskey going in taste wise

the best bang for your buck are the most common, red label, Jameson's (irish whiskey), jim bean and makers mark (bourbon whiskeys) and jack daniels.

as you come to appreciate whiskey more I would encourage you to try more expensive brands, NOT premium ranges of common brands
they are undoubtedly solid whiskeys, but poor value on the whole.

other miscellaneous considerations:
if you like whiskey cold, but don't want it watered down buy whiskey stones
try a rusty nail, a simply mix of whiskey and Drambuie that really hits you where you live (don't be afraid to specify which whiskey you want, I use Jameson's)

>>7370883
A splash of water (maybe a barspoons worth) is actually amazing at making Scotch more floral and palatable. Especially so with most Islay Scotches.

Also I would recommend Elijah Craig as an awesome bourbon that is really well priced.

>>7370892
threre might be some truth in that, if so I havn't noticed myself

I speak as an observer of peoples drinking habits, not as a practitioner in the case of whiskey

>>7369963
just say a 7&7

grain belt