This bird needs to be ready in 6 hours. Tell me how to make

>>7257489
thaw and cook it.

>>7257489
Pressure cooker. Spices. bit of chicken stock. Cook for 80 minutes or from frozen.Pull it for tacos. Not sure what else to tell you from frozen. Microwave to thaw will make it dry.

>>7257489
>freezerburnt chicken carcass
>delicious
not gonna happen

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I don't understand

>>7257531

They mean anything other than a battery-cage broiler. Free-range, that sort of thing.

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I broke its legs and neck to fit in my tiny roaster. Time to douse it with butter and spices and vegetables. Paprika is a good chicken spice, right? And how does a spice get called allspice when it clearly is not every spice moxed together?

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>>7257498
>Pressure cooker.
>80 minutes
You're a fucking idiot, son.

>>7257531
Most European chickens are higher welfare than American ones due to the more generous social security regimes in European nations.

that thing is freezer burnt to shit son, go buy a fresh one it's like $5

>>7257553
>allspice is the dried berry of the West Indian allspice tree.

>>7257564
How does a tree get named allspice?

>>7257571
That's a good question. Luckily, I have a link to the answer right here. It's from a fairly obscure website, so I can understand why you couldn't figure it out.

http://lmgtfy.com/?q=allspice+etymology

I mean, who ever heard of a Google?!

Oinion and carrots. Still on the fence spice wise

>>7257579
Jesus Christ you're a smug fuck, aren't you?

>frozen bird
>need it ready in 6 hours

too late for that shit, OP.

>>7257586
I'd rather be smug than unable to solve my own problems.

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>>7257585
>>7257585

Spice problems solved

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wiZJP_XLmrQ

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Ah yiss, let's try this shit on for size

>>7257592
That's a good start. Now throw some chicken stock, a little salt, pepper, and maybe a little garlic powder in there, apply heat for the appropriate amount of time and you'll be golden like the shower.

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>>7257591
touché

>>7257591
But your problem is smugness, which you're failing at solving right before our eyes!

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>>7257592
Now stick your wand in its poophole.
Your cream will give it a unique, lovely taste and your guests will surely love it.

>>7257634
I just hope there aren't giblets inside, because it is too frozen to check.

>>7257489
use a high pressure cooker you idiot.

>>7257609
Smugness isn't a problem as long as you're right. It's only when you try to be smug when you're in the wrong that you come off as a giant spastic.

Throw it away and go to Chik fil A.

>>7257710
I disagree. There is such a thing as a poor winner. The fact that you think you are entitled to be smug because you're on the right side of the argument is almost worse than being smug for being wrong.

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Internet implies a cooking time of approximately 2-1/2 hours. Well, shit, I got an hour to spare.

>>7257719
I can only assume that you lose more arguments than you win if you think that way.

>>7257749
>I'm running out of ways to defend smugness.
I think we're done here.

>>7257806
>the big boys treat me like a retard when I say something retarded

>>7257609
It's not a problem. You're the only one who has a problem with it.
>>7257719
No, if I were a poor winner I would have called you a stupid fucking faggot, which you are.
>>7257710
>>7257749
>>7257828
Thanks for the assist.

>>7257738
ngl senpai your guests are gonna be extremely disappointed

>>7257586
It's probably Flyover Guy.

Did you stick your dick in it?

>>7257971
>Flyover Guy
Who the fuck is that?

That poor thing gave his life for...... this.

>>7257938
lol

>>7257553
Holy shit bet the gizzards and residual hemoglobin are still in the cavity this is going to be good 7/10 OP, don't fail my expectations of you.

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1-1/2 hour update, putting in the potatoes

>>7258133

Are those potatoes raw

Come back OP :_:

>>7258352
They wre. I doused them in he leftover spice and canola oil. Tasted like chicken. No giblets neither.

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>>7258490

>>7257557
>socialistcockseverywhere.jpg

>>7258490
did you not parboil?

>>7258647
parboil...potatoes?

I only know one of those words.

>>7258492
https://vimeo.com/133441452

>duck's off

>>7258826

To partly cook the potato prior to roasting, either by steaming or boiling. Similar to cooking pasta extra al-dente prior to adding it to a hot sauce to finish the cook... or searing meat after cooking sous vide

After part-cooking the potatoes, try vigorously tossing them in olive oil and a good coarse salt or salt flakes. This should leave the outside of each potato with a coating of something close to mashed potato, which when roasted crisps up beautifully. Since the potatoes are already part-cooked, this can be done in a very short time at a high temperature.

>>7258931
>searing meat after cooking sous vide
Given the question posed by the op and the fact that he thinks you get roast potatoes by shoving raw potatoes in the oven I don't think he's quite fallen for the sous vide meme just yet

>>7258942
This is how i make oven potatoe wedges aswell. Toss them raw in oil and spices and put them in the oven. At the restaurant i used to work in we would do the same. Actually never tried parboiling potatoes before putting them in the oven.

>>7257554
care to explain why he's and idiot, or do you just not like his font type?