Kawaii Slav-squat edition
>Bitch about Facebook groups and other online comms
>No singling people out
>Censor names in posts as much as possible
am I the only one who's noticed this.. thing in RC? there's someone with a male name and a catgirl profile pic who's signing all of his posts with a female name. not sure if troll, mental illness or a creep, it's giving me weird vibes
90% of my comm is inactive, meaning they never post, comment or come to meets.
Very few girls are experienced lolitas the rest aren't even beginners, just people who claim to be "interested in the fashion" but never make an effort to buy tgeir first piece. Its enfuriating. I wish we could kick those members out of the comm.
well it took them 2 weeks to accept me so I don't really know what's up
I took the liberty of doing a small profile lurk, oh god
yooo I think I saw this person commenting on stuff too, but I think I saw them in RC:U instead. He gives me a weird vibe too. I guess the only thing we can do is what >>8763222 said and just keep an eye on him...unless someone is ballsy enough to bring him to the mods just as a potential member to look out for or something.
I don't think it's that simple. I admit being one of these people, but with a small wardrobe that doesn't coincide with many themed meets. I feel that if the theme is strongly encouraged I shouldn't turn up and ruin what the organizer was going for. In a way, I suppose politeness may be causing some strain.
but rarely are themes that heavily enforced...they may be strongly encouraged but next to no comm is going to stop you from hanging out with them if you show up and you aren't in theme. I don't know your comm or the meet organizers but I don't understand why you don't just ask if it's okay if you attend even if you don't have a coord that matches the theme. My comm has had meets where themes are encouraged but no one cares if you don't follow it. Again, I don't know your comm but I seriously doubt they're gonna like rage on you and throw you out in an angry hellfire if you show up without following the theme.
>Comes from a 100% drama-free comm.
Maybe it's because my comm is so chill, I wonder what it'd be like to have some kind of drama - but then I remember I'm just an old salt and should be grateful for the eternal calm.
Topic was things you don't like in lolita. How can you not identify people based on their face?
I typically can't if I've only seen them once or twice before. It's odd when people come up and start talking and I have to ask if I know them.
Mainly if I'm not Facebook friends with them, I don't remember
wigs and such can kind of really change how a person looks actually, more than you would think. I'm generally good at remembering faces but for some people they just look so drastically different to me when they have a wig on for one meet but then come with their natural hair that looks totally different. it doesn't help either that some people may switch styles, flip between wearing glasses or contacts, etc.
I understand the frustration, but the thing about this fashion is you have so much possibility to create different looks! Recognize people by voice is another good way to go. If you're not familiar with them to the point when you know what they sound like, maybe it's not so big of a problem just to tell them that they look so different that you don't recognize them at first glance?
I was shocked by some of the posts on rufflechat by some different lolita mentor this past week. I always trusted their opinion, but they a little bit bullied the mod of another group for no reason...I think it makes them look badly.
My comm does "theme encouraged" meets. Not mandatory. Plenty of people rock up in outfits that don't fit the encouraged theme. And yet, our active member count is probably 40-50 out of 250 listed.
Even without taking wigs into account, people change their appearances pretty dramatically in lolita from one outfit to the next. Different make-up. False eyelashes. Glasses versus contacts. And so on and so forth. If you don't see these people on a regular basis, but only once or twice a month at meets, it's going to take longer for their face to become familiar.
And this is a special case, but I often have issues because our comm has a strange number of people who are siblings/relatives (four or five sibling pairs, at least one of which is identical twins; all of which are close enough in age and appearance that wigs and make-up can mix shit up. We also have a couple of girls whose cousins come to meets with them now and then, and they also have resemblances going on).
I often mix people up with their sisters if I have only run into them a couple of times. It doesn't help that these sibling pairs frequently twin with one another for events.
I'll bite, anon. I'm part of the CO comm. There's a really good amount of well-dressed Lolitas, and most of us are really nice. There's a few bad apples and annoying itas, but it seems to me like people improve quickly, and everyone is polite to each other. We meet up at least once a month-- there's a meetup happening this Saturday, actually.
However, right now we have a bunch of newbies shitting up the group page, and I'm personally a bit annoyed by that. But I'm just a salty bitch.
tl;dr CO is great, I love my comm.
I don't wear wigs often, but love them on other people. I'm also quite face-blind. I often worry about people thinking I don't like them because I've met them several times and still struggle to recognize them.
Making friends in cosplay/lolita is hard.
This is just so...wrong? Although knowing it's only a replica I care less. However she shouldn't be comparing because she doesn't own the real one. She's making people worry needlessly.
Also points for thread being started by everyone's favorite militant vegan and her mentioning it in the first 10 posts.
Yeah that was pretty cringe. Especially the one that basically said she wouldn't follow their rules because she didn't like them. Wtf?
We have identical twins in my comm as well and I get them confused every time. I thought it would be easier when they started wearing wigs, but it turned out that they switch them up. I can only tell after five minutes of staring if they stand next to each.
Of course, they alternate between finding it hilarious and twinning on purpose to throw people off, and getting faux-upset that people can't tell them apart as a result.
Conventions are the worst, though. Everyone posts a selfie of their outfit or whatever, so I know what to look for. As a result, I'll run up shouting one sister's name, she'll turn around, and it's the other one laughing at me. Just.
Has anyone else been getting dodgy "sponsorship" offers on Tumblr lately? I only have maybe 150 followers on my lolita url, so I'm far from efamous, but I've gotten three messages this week from two anons and one named accounts offering me free clothes in "cooperation with their stores".
>Hi dear, we show great interest in your blog and like to cooperate with you to promote our store(about clothes). In return, you would be paid by cash or free clothes. Have interest? If yes,please leave me your email so that we can provide you more details, thanks.
>Hi dear, after reading your tumblr, I appreciate it very much and want to cooperate with you to promote our women’s clothes. Are you interested? If yes, please let me know your email or other contact tools, thanks.
I had no intention of responding. Just was wondering if other people had been getting similar.
The virus part I doubt though. They didn't include a link, and the second message came through anonymous twice. More likely one of those scams where they have you pay a "safety deposit" on the "free" items, then never reimburse you.
I got one too. I'm only at 250 followers.
>Dear, we appreciate your blog a lot. We sincerely invite you to cooperate with us to promote our website(about clothes). You can get free clothes or cash in return. Interested? If yes, please leave me your email then we can send you more details. Thanks!
I understand where this person is coming from. I absolutely suck at memorizing faces, and especially attaching faces to names, it takes a while for me to remember someone's name and it's pretty impossible when their appearance changes dramatically every time I see them.
It's so fucking hard for me to tell white girls apart if they're all wearing wigs. All white people look the same to me, specially if they're fat/chub and loose all distinctive bone structure underneath the fat. My comm has about 6 plus sized girls and I get them confused all the godamn time.
Thankfully I remember faces but terrible at names, but I'll never forget a face. People dye and change their natural hair all the time. Some people just look better in wigs. Heaven forbid I wear my natural hair with lolita. I'd get shat on for having such fine, thin, limp hair despite doing everything in my power to style it. Wigs are my little ita protection hats.
Kek, what's gonna happen if that person wants to ask for bank transer?
I remember an anon posting that they got banned from fril for trying to use Tenso, it won't work.
I'm guessing the problem is not the wig, but wearing a different wig every time. Most people don't have a wildly different hair color and -style every time you see them.
ehh i think it was a fair question i dont think she saw it was a photo from a main post. i cant stand reading posts where the other girl is commenting in she shits up any conversation possible
I'm so tired of seeing all the, "What are your non - lolita hobbies?" and "What's something unpopular you hate?" posts in RC and RC:U.
I get it, promoting discussion, blah blah blah. But at the same time, I understand that you all want to be the true special fucking snowflake on the lolita comm pages.
"I work on cars! I go to punk shows! I have bjd's! I only watch invader Zim in my mom's basement!"
Like calm down, if your a functioning adult, I expect you to have one or two other things you enjoy besides lolita. No need to proclaim it to the world every week.
And every unpopular opinion post just winds up as a circle jerk on classic vs sweet, what's appropriate for lolita and what isn't, all spear headed by the wonderful black power duo(inb4 *racist* tell me another way to describe them and I will).
You aren't a real mod. Shut the fuck up or remove this person right now to prove it.
You aren't fooling anyone, the RC mods are lazy scum who don't bother reading ANY profiles let alone real members of genuine worth and appeal far greater than this creepy sissy loser.
Is anyone here a part of the Big Sisters of Lolita Fashion group? I was curious about it when their post came up on a RC post asking for more members, so I joined. They have an application process to become a "big sister". I looked it over briefly and thought it was a rather dumb set of questions that all revolved around "how to buy from X" or "where do you buy X" questions. As if knowing where or how to buy a Lolita item makes you qualified to tell someone how to dress? The only question that had any semblance of critical thinking was "What new item would you recommend a new Lolita buy first?"
Also, I find that having generic big sisters is kind of illogical. I am a Classic Lolita. I know the bare basics for Sweet, Gothic or any of the sub styles for Lolita. I am not qualified to school you on any of those styles, but it doesn't make me any less of a Lolita, and it doesn't make me unqualified to help newbies that are specifically trying for Classic, so why do I need to know everything to be helpful to the group?
Know where and how to buy Lolita? Be a buying specialist sister. Know Classic Lolita and their brands? Be a Classic Lolita sister. I think they'd have a lot more help if this were the case. Or is their intent to keep the big sister status small and special snowflake-y?
The Lolita Fashion Mentoring group seems a bit more organized, but I hate that you can't contribute to a post unless approved even if the post is the most generic question ever. Someone asked how to get armpit stains out of a white blouse. Like really? I have to be approved to help answer this question?
They both suck because a lot of the people who are approved to give advice have no idea what they're talking about, and you're not allowed to interject unless you apply. It just doesn't work. If the screening process was stricter but yielded capable mentors, it might work out, but you know.
Hello! I'm a mod for BSoLF. Are you sure you read the entire test? A lot of the questions on it are questions that pop up A LOT and that people often get wrong when they don't know what they are talking about so we wanted to make sure people really knew those questions. However, there is also a coordination test and you must provide pictures of yourself as well.
As far as answering something you don't know about or aren't experienced with, you don't HAVE to answer. You never are obligated to do anything. That's why we have multiple multiple people answering questions. We have no intention of limiting who can apply either.
If you have any other questions or comments I'd love to hear them!
Re: Begging on RC: We didn't need new members. The post was a way to attempt to curb "me" questions on RC by providing a better avenue.
Also please let me know if there is anything else you think we should add (or even remove) from the test to be more thurough. For those that aren't in the group to see them here are the test questions:
1.Of the following Japanese brands/stores which can you buy from directly? How can you purchase from those that don’t ship directly overseas? Which do you need to use a forwarding service for? List the purchase method for each shop (cart, email, forwarding service or shopping service)
a. Angelic Pretty
b. Moi Meme Moitie
c. Baby the Stars Shine Bright
f. H. Naoto
g. Atelier Boz
2. Name at least two (2) second hand shops and how to purchase from them (email, cart, forwarding/shopping service)
3. Name at least one shopping service you would recommend
4. What is Taobao? How do you order from Taobao? What language is Taobao? What currency does Taobao use?
5. List at least two (2) brands or resources you would recommend for “plus size” lolitas. List at least two (2) brands or resources you would recommend to “petite” lolitas.
6. What shops or resources would you recommend lolitas on a budget, young lolitas, or those who just want to “test drive” the fashion?
7. What item(s) would you recommend a new Lolita buy first?
8. Describe the appropriate type of lace used on a quality Lolita garment.
9. How would you discourage a new Lolita from purchasing a low quality item? (Milanoo (etc.), Replicas, “cosplay Lolita”). How would you steer them in a better direction?
10. What makes a wig appropriate for Lolita? What makes a wig inappropriate?
11. What is Yahoo Japan? How do you order from Yahoo Japan?
12. What is Mbok? How do you order from Mbok?
All but 5,7 (sort of),8, 9 (sort of) and 10 are about buying things. That's less than half.
I also don't think it's paramount to know how to order from h.Naoto in order to give someone advice on lolita, but that's just me.
DESU, your big sisters would sound a lot more credible if they could prove they knew more about fit/sizing, body shapes, and color theory as well as having some fabric/trim knowledge. Try including those kinds of questions too. There are way too many people who don't know how to dress for their body shapes.
If those "where/how to buy" questions come up a lot, they can be included, but it shouldn't be a prerequisite to be becoming a big sister. Try a "How much do you know about buying?" where someone can give you an open ended answer. A lot of the buying questions can be answered by simply Googling the question, or just by asking someone else for the answer. Doesn't mean the person answering the question knows what they are talking about. Also, some people hand make their Lolita stuff instead of buying, so where does it leave someone like that? You already have plenty of people on the big sister list that can answer those types of questions anyway. Again, having designated "specialists" that can answer specific questions in their field would probably work out better. Someone who dresses in Sweet shouldn't really be answering questions about Gothic Lolita if that's not their specialty.
I'd also like to note that just because you can dress yourself well and have been doing it for 8+ years, doesn't mean you can dress someone else equally as well. So I am inclined to think that big sisters and mentors should be more like personal shoppers. This includes knowing their customers taste and knowing how to coordinate for them (and not for yourself). People tend to to say "personally, I wouldn't wear X, but..." Leave the personal stuff out. You're not dressing you; you're helping someone dress themselves.
>However, there is also a coordination test and you must provide pictures of yourself as well.
Who judges the coord pictures? And what qualifies as a great coord vs a good, but simple/plain coord? It's all subjective.
Just to reiterate, there is a coordination part of the test where we give you some random ass hard to coordinate item off of Lolibrary and let you coord it. If it came back trashy we'd deny the person. Also, if the pictures they provide of themselves are terrible as well we deny them.
Most of the time we don't get questions that are super specific to a certain subset of the fashion. Unless you're talking about how to coord items? I think it's possible to build a good sweet coord for someone without wearing sweet for example. Most of the good handmade Lolitas would also be able to answer the buying questions properly, even if they had to google a few of them. Unfortunately the well dressed "handmade only" Lolitas are so few and very far between. I would like to see more of them!
I do give fit advice often if someone asks. (Ex. High waisted skirts really don't look good on round large busted girls) Unfortunatly those types of questions don't pop up often and when they do it's often "I bought this item and it doesn't look right on me how can I change/hide it?"
If someone just posts a main piece and asks how to coord it my first response is to ask things to try and figure out what direction they want to take it, what items they have already, and what color(s) they want to incorporate. I think that's pretty personal. I'm not sure what else I could do in that area.
Often the use of phrases like "I think" and "personally" are used to sound like you're not commanding someone to do something. I use those phrases especially for people I think will be really snowflaky and go the route of "waahh don't tell me what to do!"
Thanks for your input again!!
All of the mods judge. It takes a 2/3 vote to pass/fail someone. Simple/plain is fine and we welcome it! There are people that wear Lolita as regular clothing after all. Not everything needs to be OTT all the time. We look at color balance, overall aesthetic, and are all the basics there.
>where we give you some random ass hard to coordinate item off of Lolibrary and let you coord it. If it came back trashy we'd deny the person.
So if you gave me a hard to coord Gothic item and I am specifically Classic, aren't you setting me up for failure? I mean, yeah, I understand where you're getting at with this part of the test, but like how does this prove to you that I'm Lolita enough for your group?
>Also, if the pictures they provide of themselves are terrible as well we deny them.
So still subjective? I mean I've seen plenty of comments on CoF vs cgl where a lot of people like it and a lot of people hate it. How do you judge a look if it's not your cup of tea? What is trashy? Is Boring Lolita ok so long as it looks Lolita enough and not ita? How much advice can a boring Lolita give? If I gave you a picture of a full coord in an AP set with headbow, JSK, and socks all in the same matching print, would I pass? It's not hard to look Lolita like that.
>Unfortunately the well dressed "handmade only" Lolitas are so few and very far between. I would like to see more of them!
If that's the case, you should definitely include something about wanting/accepting handmade Lolitas to your group because I saw none of that, and thought you were only accepting brand Lolitas only, especially with all your buying questions.
>If someone just posts a main piece and asks how to coord it my first response is to ask things to try and figure out what direction they want to take it, what items they have already, and what color(s) they want to incorporate. I think that's pretty personal. I'm not sure what else I could do in that area.
Then try adding a "what if" scenario question to your test and see how a mock-up answer would come from the potential candidate. That would tell you a lot more about the person than asking if they know how to buy from a SS, wouldn't it?
I have this, actually. Thanks to some brain stuff I'm not able to remember faces (the whole world looks as samey as a group of Chinese to me) so I focus on things like hair and piercings.
All of this is reason enough why I left BSOLF and the other one (forgot its name) a while back. I don't feel like I should have to be approved by someone's subjective opinions on things.
Questions should be as simple as "How long have you been wearing the fashion?", showing example coords and general knowledge questions. A lot of these questions and ideas are based on opinion.
I agree with you. Though I don't mind the sample scenario test questions because you can see how someone will react/respond. If they are going to be highly opinionated/elitist, aggressive, or angry, I would not approve them as a helper.
I agree with this. It's pointless to make people list how to buy from every major brand, just put a couple of advice scenarios and some basic info (how long they have been wearing it, etc). I have a friend who has been in the fashion forever and is always well-dressed, but still doesn't know how to buy from brands directly.
>So if you gave me a hard to coord Gothic item and I am specifically Classic, aren't you setting me up for failure?
I'm another big sister for the group and I dress exclusively in sweet. I was given a classic piece to coordinate and I did fine, because I know what I'm doing with lolita in general. If you only know how to coordinate for one specific sub style, then you're not mod material. It's not hard to grasp the other styles, and not wearing those styles isn't an excuse for you not having at least some coordinating skills with it. It's not hard.
>So still subjective?
Ita is ita. If you can't dress yourself, then I'm not going to trust you with trying to dress others. Of course it's subjective, how can it not be? And even people who buy full brand sets still can't dress themselves, you know (let's not forget how bad Kate would mess up in regards to her...questionable hair and makeup).
>especially with all your buying questions
The buying questions are fine because a) most girls buy all of their lolita items and b) a lot of girls come into the group asking where to buy shit all the time.
> I have a friend who has been in the fashion forever and is always well-dressed, but still doesn't know how to buy from brands directly.
I'm really curious as to how she wouldn't know basic information like that. She's never even been curious and looked it up just in case something came up that she wanted...? I don't buy from a lot of the major brands directly either but I still know how their basic ordering systems work.
>I'm another big sister for the group and I dress exclusively in sweet. I was given a classic piece to coordinate and I did fine, because I know what I'm doing with lolita in general. If you only know how to coordinate for one specific sub style, then you're not mod material. It's not hard to grasp the other styles, and not wearing those styles isn't an excuse for you not having at least some coordinating skills with it. It's not hard.
I could do it if it really came down to coording in another style, but that isn't to say that I would do it well or with justice. I don't follow Gothic brands and am not as familiar with their pieces, so if I were to be given a Gothic item to coord, I could do it very boringly, but not ita. How impressive would that be? Is that even passable? It's not unusual for someone to be in a specific style and not expend the energy to learn about all the styles. I have no interest in Gothic; why would I learn it just for the sake of it? And honestly, I think Sweet and Classic are a lot closer in style than say Gothic, which is why I chose it as my example. If I were given a sweet coord to do , I'd be able to do it just fine given that the majority of US Lolitas like sweet, dress sweet, and blog about sweet. It's not hard to find more info about sweet stuff.
>Ita is ita. If you can't dress yourself, then I'm not going to trust you with trying to dress others. Of course it's subjective, how can it not be? And even people who buy full brand sets still can't dress themselves, you know (let's not forget how bad Kate would mess up in regards to her...questionable hair and makeup).
I disagree. Your definition of ita is already different than mine. I don't know much about Kate as I joined the community right when shit hit the fan and then she disappeared. The little of her that I know about are the pictures she posted on Instagram, and I always thought she looked fine. If people are hating on her about her personality, that's another thing. I never thought Kate looked ita. (Unless I missed something truly horrible.)
>The buying questions are fine because a) most girls buy all of their lolita items and b) a lot of girls come into the group asking where to buy shit all the time.
Then make it a buying group instead of a fashion help group. Your title is misleading.
And you are probably only getting girls who buy Lolita because you don't make an effort to include handmade Lolitas.
I'm not sure what you mean by "boring", honestly. I know some people that think that anything not OTT is "boring" for instance, which is entirely not true and not really something that the other big sisters in the group believe in either. And a "boring" coord doesn't mean it's a bad one necessarily. If it works within the aesthetic, has good item choices, and is cute, then to me it's passable. Simple as that.
>implying that you'd have to dive super deep into a sub style in order to slap together a decent coord
>implying that finding good goth coords for inspo is difficult just because it's not as popular as sweet or classic
>The little of her that I know about are the pictures she posted on Instagram, and I always thought she looked fine.
You missed out on her horrible wigs and makeup then; go search around. Kate wasn't ita for the most part, but her coord choices outside of just slapping all the brand she could onto herself were pretty bad.
>pic related, putting lip gloss in your wig is super kawaii
>invests all that money into wigs and can't even style them right
Anyway I'm getting side tracked.
>Then make it a buying group instead of a fashion help group. Your title is misleading.
No? I'm saying a lot of girls ask buying questions, not all of them. Many also ask for coord advise, too. Are you even in the group?
>And you are probably only getting girls who buy Lolita because you don't make an effort to include handmade Lolitas.
Handmade lolitas are welcome to join. We're getting a lot of girls that want to buy their lolita items in the group because the majority of people interested in the fashion in general want to buy it, not make it themselves. So logically and statistically, we're going to get more of those people come into a newbie help group. Also, handmade lolitas can always go to specific help groups for them like Pintucks and Lace as well. Christ, anon, this isn't hard to understand.
>I'm really curious as to how she wouldn't know basic information like that
Because she never needed to. Why would you look it up unless you want to buy something specific? She gets all her brand from closetchild or in-store when she travels to Japan.
I don't know what you're trying to do, your application process sucks and you're just sitting here defending it rather than seriously considering the suggestions that people give you.
>yet some how really pretty eye makeup??
sorry i had to ruin that for you too, anon.
You realize there are too different people here right? There is a big sister and a mod. She can't change things I can.
However I agree with everything she's said? I think it's fairly important to be well rounded in the information you know if you want to give advice to someone else. You (or someone else) mentioned personal shoppers as an example. They would need to know how to dress multiple body types, in multiple styles, with multiple budgets.
As far as handmade goes, I think we've literally had less than five posts in two years. All of them have been about pieces being appropriate or how to coord a finished piece. Everyone goes to Pintucks and Lace or other seeing groups that make much more sense for their question type. If I saw more of those questions being asked I would add them to the rest, but currently it encompasses questions that are similar to 99% of what we get asked.
If you don't want to or can't leave bothered to learn information you yourself may never personally use, that's fine. You can make yourself look good and you're happy? That's great! But you shouldn't be able to advise other people. Attitude is a huge part of it too.
My main problem is exactly that knowing how to buy from every brand doesn't reflect your attitude or your ability to help someone dress themselves. You mentioned that there was a coordinate test as well, but as another anon pointed out that's highly subjective. Even if this group is intended to be a "personal shopper helps you" style group (which is not what it advertises as), there's more to it than just knowing how to purchase things, not to mention that these are things that don't prove your experience, just your ability to use google.
But since all of the people who are involved with the group seem to think it's fine, whatever.
There is a lot of people who are not into buying direct. They either depend on 2ndhand stores or places like LM. I can see someone just not bothering because of the price tag of buying new if they do not care about trends.
The issue with this sentiment is that on paper someone like Kate should pass. She would be able to answer the questions. She has a lot of money to throw around so im sure that the questions about shopping she can answer. On paper she also is okay at styling, nitpicking is just that. We have the videos she did that show that close up her styling sucks but that is not anything you would have gotten in an application. If you didnt know her and she gave in shots of outfits she had, then at most you may pick up on her inability to style her wigs.
That's not really what I said. We aren't personal shoppers. Someone used that as an example and then either they or someone else then went on to say it's only necessary to be versed in one style.
Again those questions are there simply because they are 75% of every single question that gets posted. Do those specific buying questions gauge your overall experience? No, not really, but it lets me know you can help those 75%. The rest of the tests cover everything else.
We literally had a girl come in and say you needed a shopping service for Bodyline once. THOSE are the types that's intended to weed out. Just people that would spout incorrect information.
As for the coord photos and collage. We basically have a list of criteria and we go straight down the list with every person. We have not turned a single applicant away at this point based on their personal photographs. If someone submits photos of themselves wearing a JSK with no blouse, sneakers, no petti, etc. If someone submits a photo or collage where it is obvious they can't balance colors or don't understand what is and isn't appropriate for the fashion, THATS what we don't want. One of the girls who applied DID send us a coord where her main piece was handmade. Guess what? She got accepted.
I really don't know how else to explain it.
your test is way too long right now as-is, and is built on pretty specific knowledge that many might not know (ex. if I'm not sweet, I might not know AP/BTSSB's buying methods to the T). same with secondhand and brand. allow people to pick one or smth/make the first question into something like 'list 2 brands that make dresses of your substyle and how you can order from them'
same with plus-size and petite, I'm 'perfect measurements' for brand and really have no idea what someone plus-size could go for apart from shirring and F+F.
more questions about the actual fashion over how to buy it.
also, unpopular opinion, but if someone does well with the theory and your coording assignment they shouldn't need to provide pics of themselves wearing coords (but that goes into the whole 'how many pieces do you need to be a lolita' and I don't want to get into that here.)
except the big sister earlier literally called herself a mod...
basically, >>8773161. I guess I'll go and join LFM and see if they're any better.
no public callouts are allowed on 4chan.
Kind of agreeing with >>8773207 here. For question 1, I could understand asking about the major brands, but most people aren't going to know how to order from H.Naoto or Boz. If you just want people to be able to google the info, fine, I guess, but why even make that a question, then?
I think most of the questions are fine, but the test seems far too centered on shopping, especially shopping from stores. Why not have questions about the community's secondhand market (LM, EGL Sales, etc.) or basic good buying/selling practices? Or even questions about Hello Lace/Lolibrary?
>Handmade lolitas are welcome to join. We're getting a lot of girls that want to buy their lolita items in the group
Sorry, I was not saying that you should make an effort to recruit more handmade Lolitas into the group, but that you seem to exclude handmade Lolitas as being able to become a Big Sister in that your questions are all specifically about buying. Handmade Lolitas don't really buy Lolita (you know what I mean, please don't read too much into this). Like I always get the impression that handmade Lolitas aren't taken as serious Lolitas because they don't buy. Sure, the major of them make pretty bad stuff. But there are some that make really beautiful dresses and wear only handmade things (maybe buy their accessories like handbags/shoes, etc). So I was just suggesting that you make an effort to reach out to those who do hand make their own Lolita dresses (and do it well) and let them know they are Lolita enough to be Big Sisters too. Uh, does that make sense? I know I'm rambling...
>If someone submits photos of themselves wearing a JSK with no blouse, sneakers, no petti, etc. If someone submits a photo or collage where it is obvious they can't balance colors or don't understand what is and isn't appropriate for the fashion, THATS what we don't want.
This just makes it sound like you're weeding out newbies and itas, which isn't hard. I mean if that's all you're looking to reject, you've got some low standards. I was under the impression, that to be a Big Sister, you'd have to be a cut above the rest. After all, you're a Big Sister that a Little Sister is supposed to be able to look up to and admire. The majority of Lolitas, once out of the ita newbie phase, can dress decently even if it's basic/boring/full set coords. I never understood how Lolita could be hard to coord. It's not rocket science. And I suspect that people who can't coord in Lolita probably can't dress themselves normally either. They just don't have a good sense of fashion.
I have to admit I'm one of these people, I really just don't have the eye for colours and whatnot (I can understand shapes and shit though)
but that test looks like I could pass it with flying colours if I bothered to put in the extra research about buying off brandsites and mbok
The lack of ability to work with colors would probably show when we asked you to build a coord. Especially since it's a random piece you may never have even seen before!
And to everyone else I guess since I sound like a broken record this is the last time I'll say it: If you can't answer questions about something that doesn't pertain to you specifically or take the time to do so you are better suited for another group. For example a handmade Lolita that can't look up or doesn't know where to buy items or a gothic Lolita that couldn't tell someone you have to use Tenso for AP. That doesn't mean we don't want you to participate, really!, it just means you probably aren't suited to a mentoring type position.
I may have made this all sound too simple by trying to explain it. We really do make sure the people we let in are good matches. I do extra digging in other comms to make sure people can be appropriate and aren't just in it for power or attention. We really do make sure someone can dress themselves and others before we decide. If I could show the process somehow I would.
Thank you for your input again. I really do consider everything.
your problem is that you're trying to make everyone into jacks of all trades but you presumably already have a group of big sisters who can answer all the shopping questions well. why wouldn't you open it up to people who can give better advice in specific topics? you already have people who can handle the allround questions. you are looking for very specific people it seems, and that group of specific people will make the group's advice very limited.
>That doesn't mean we don't want you to participate,
What does this mean? Like how do you suggest someone participate in this group if they don't need help (little sister) and they aren't good enough to help answer questions (big sister). Does this mean that this group isn't for me? Also, do you have a big sister list? I can't seem to find one.
Your group is kind of a failure at being helpful to anything besides a really new Lolita. I'd rather have at least one person who's well versed in handmade, than a bunch of people who can tell me what I already know about buying brand. All the feedback in this thread is bouncing right off you though.
Save your fingers anon, the mods of that group are a lost cause. I honestly think the only reason they put the rules in place was so that they could feel like elitist special snowflakes
>waah why can't you change your rules just to let in the one handmade lolita who is incredible but also doesn't know what moitie is because she definitely exists and you're unfairly excluding her waah
everyone is complaining about LM always being down but what about lolibrary? been down for at least 20 hours now for me and isup.me agrees.
not really a comm but I figured this is better than the LM thread
People do complain, though. The main difference is that you can still access Lolibrary via google's cache function, so it's less of a hassle than when LM is down, since you need to access that in real time to actually use it.
the biggest dramaqueen in our comm started a 'nice lolita' group after she publicly left our comm two weeks ago. It's almost as if she want to start drama so she can feed her victim complex.
I will probably regret this to all hell but I couldn't sit and watch as another handmade ita is born..
My first dress was handmade and it turned out alright, but I had done tons of research before starting. It really is best for newbies to buy their first dress even if they want to make their own later so they can kinda get a feel for details and stuff.
With lolibrary they are always on top of it. They announce that they are having issues and are down, they will respond to questions, and are open to changes. LM is always a mystery about if things will change and get better.
Have you ever encountered someone so spectacularly, consistently stupid that you can't decide if they're a troll or not? A girl in a nearby comm is always posting/commenting on Facebook with the most idiotic replies, and at this point, I genuinely can't tell if she has a cinder block for a brain, or if she's just trying to rile people up.
I can't stand people like this desu
SJWs who go on about body freedom and shaming are worse, but newbies with the whole "lovelies" attitude really get to me too
Are there any bearable online comms?
It's not even the "lovelies" attitude. It's the extremes of the opinion that are ridiculous.
It's like there's nothing to wear in between lolita and tiny micro mini skirts.
Have these girls never gone clothes shopping before?
I don't get why people complain at all? You get a website FOR FREE with very useful information and / or great functions. Those websites do cost money but noone pays the servers except the owners who also spend a lot of time maintaining the website. So why compain?
because cgl is full of entitled ungrateful bitches. I'm honestly surprised lacemarket chan hasn't deleted the site at this point. Everyone treats her like shit even though she did everything for free
oh my god stop fucking saying that argument over and over again
4chan is fucking free but that doesn't stop people from bitching about the janitors and mods and moot when he was still here
find a new argument because it literally doesn't matter if it's free
if you're making something *for the community* then the people using it have every right to complain wtf
asking for a website that is functional really isn't asking for a lot, that's a given for any admin that starts up a website.
it would be one thing if alice was really trying her best and was just dealing with a shitty server or something but that's not the case. alice had the chance to hand the website over to other people who had more time, skills, energy, etc. to contribute to the website but for whatever retarded reason she refuses. i think it's pretty clear that the website has just gotten too much for her to handle. if she can't take care of it anymore fine, we all have lives, that's understandable, but if something isn't working then she literally needs to give it up like she was supposed to or just shut it the fuck down.
what's the point in keeping a website running if it isn't even functional more than half the time?
for fuck's sake, it says 'debate' in the goddamn name of the group. take your fugly bodyline dress and your newfag question to LFM or BSoLF or something. we're not going to diagnose your fucking dress colour.
>this is a very serious matter!!1!
(I'm being salty as shit, I know, unrelated causes but this shit ticked me off hard)
Can't even talk about hair colors and skin undertones without being a racist now smdh
>Wonderfinch posting in RC:U now
God damnit. I was hoping she would stick to RC so I wouldn't have to see her ridiculous opinions. She can fuck right off.
I feel like she has gotten worse ever since people left EGL en masse and she feels like she has nothing to do/no power so now she ruins facebook comms with comments like this
The OP is just talking about avoiding looking ganguro and they have to drag it like she meant it in general. She even says it wouldn't matter much unless you have the orange fake tan and make up meaning that she doesn't even really thinks a pale wig with a tanned person would make them look like ganguro in the first place.
The first girl already mentions in her first comment that people with a natural tan won't look like ganguro and you need the fake tan or white make-up even with a light wig. Yet wonderfinch claims she said the opposite. It's like she can't even read.
>I don't think you will end up looking like a ganguro that fast unless your skin is orange with white marks, it is a lot different from a natural tan
>When you say things like "A darker-skinned person who wears a pale wig with Lolita will look like ganguro even if they are not wearing ganguro makeup or clothing,"
wow. she's actually making shit up to try and prove her own points.
i really hope threads don't derail with race shit like they used to when that girl Emma was around. i've have enough of that shit
What a bitch. My skin is really really fair, almost and all my attempts in wearing dark-coloured wigs led in making me look like a zombie, also, so I wouldn't recommand to really light skinned people to wear black wigs either. Also, what the fuck? Did she never see the attempts of really dark skinned people to wear platinium-blond hair/wigs like Marylin Monroe or something? Did she never see how bad it looked? It's not about racism, it just doesn't work in way of colors, like someone with warm or cold undertone cannot wear the same wigs all the time.
I'm mixed German and Japanese and I have white as snow skin with a yellow undertone. Like so white that if I were to buy foundation from a US brand I have to mix white into the lightest shade white. I have always been encouraged to lighten my very dark brown hair because it washes me out even more. I've been hearing that since I was probably 7 or 8 too. "Oh do you want highlights? It'll look so much nicer!" So bitch if I've been hearing it for 15 years I'm willing to be lots of other pale girls get that shit too.
Yeah that's who I was talking about.
I've always hated this victim mentality. People like Wonderfuck would have me believe I've been made a victim because I'm not 100% European and probably the patriarchy shit too. I have a successful carrier in medicine and have never been told once in my life that I couldn't or shouldn't pursue my dreams. I had to work hard to get here but no white man ever held me back. People like her make my blood boil.
Also she's a massive ita despite her self-proclaimed expertise in the fashion and has improved exactly zero in however long she's been around. So Wonderfuck, YOU can go step on a Lego.
Ganguro are like reverse panda bears. I think it is pretty obvious advice to avoid stark contrast if you want to avoid that look. She even mentioned the still needing make-up part and that a natural tan doesn't make you ganguro. Why the hell does Wonderfinch have to create a race war out of an innocent comment like that is aggravating.
I hate the sewing comms sometimes
>some girl posts asking for advice on whether fandom fabrics are loliable
>3 people explain why it's not really a good idea
>random chick jumps in with a progress pic of a superhero jsk that uses ridiculously busy fabric
>OP who has been completely silent so far suddenly pops in with 'Love it!! :3'
>pls take me away sewing gods
not our fault when she gets posted into cringe/ita I guess
I love how Wondercunt is arguing so fucking hard with the other dark skinned girl in the thread. Bless the other girl for even bothering to try.
Tbh I am pretty sick of being told I can't wear X colour because it looks bad because of my skin colour when white girls are apparently a blank canvas on which everything looks good. I don't use Tumblr, I'm not an angry black woman SJW stereotype but I hate being outright told I can't wear pastels or should only wear colours you'd find on some African print.
Lolita's mostly seem to act like 'lovelies' because they're trying to either keep up the pure victorian doll image or avoid having their name dragged through the dirt on various dedicated avenues of the internet.
In black too. Never been told to wear African prints and not to wear pastels. Also white girls get told what colors they can and can't wear all the time, depending on their skin tone.
Also, read the whole thread. It wasn't about that. Wondercunt just made it about that out of nowhere.
You're not an idiot, like you said this question comes up all the time
When I first made the group it was called rufflechat uncensored, but one of the rufflechat mods asked me kindly to change the name because some dumbasses (not her words) might confuse it with rufflechat proper
I'm not sure how to make it more findeable
I'd assume because of the book. I've had people tag my posts with "tw: lolita mention" and "tw: abuse connotations" in the same reblog.
How the fuck a frilly dress laid out on the bed with the rest of my coordinate has "abuse connotations" is beyond me. Especially when the text is nothing but a rundown of the outfit itself.
Fucking tumblr asshats, man.
Nope. If someone reblogs and tags your post with "#ageplayer" or some shit, it'll be attached to your post from then on. Other people will only see it if they reblog from that person, or use Xkit's tag viewer, but it means that your post will show up in searches for 'ageplayer' from then on.
Tumblr only identifies the first five tags on a post, however. So if the tag is more than five tags in it only registers on the blog that used it (example: they tag it with "#lolita fashion, #lolita wardrobe, #innocent world, #angelic pretty, #coordinate, #ageplayer", tumblr will only register the first five and leave the #ageplayer tag out of searches). So there is that at least.
Oh. And the reason people tag things with trigger warning shit is because you can use a tag blocker. This means any post which has been tagged with that tag (or tagged in past reblogs with that tag) will be automatically filtered and hidden.
This can be really handy if you're aiming to avoid shit like spoilers, or certain fandoms, but if you genuinely need a trigger warning for the word "lolita" in a post, you probably need some high grade pharmaceuticals and less time on the internet.
Unless this is a recent change, as far as I know reblogs don't come up in searches, only original posts do. If someone reblogs your post and tags it as #ageplay or whatever, it only shows up on their blog as such.
Adding to this, I've had fetishists reblog almost every type of lolita I post. Sweet is obviously the most popular with ageplayers, but they're not the only ones looking to jerk off to us in frilly dresses. My classic stuff will sometimes get reblogged by a handful of interracial porn blogs too, I still can't figure that one out since I don't really post photos with other people.
Just did a quick test and looks like you're right. I guess it only works that way for tag blockers then.
I know that I've had stuff get blocked by my filter, even though the post itself wasn't tagged directly.
tumblr doesnt work like that any more, im pretty sure its all just one big search feature now. if you post a selfie and caption it as 'Wow, I love this lolita coord!" it will show up in both lolita and coord without even tagging
this isn't even true. so many white girls look like garbage in pastel wigs, gray wigs, and white wigs when black girls can look great in it.
TONS of people suggest pastel colors on black girls.
Not entirely sure if this is the right thread for this, but I don't want to kill a thread for what could be a dumb idea.
I know there's a lot of lone lolitas here who for whatever reason can't or won't participate in their comms who still want lolita friends. I personally don't participate in many facebook groups, and I know I'm not alone in that.
Would anyone be interested in creating something like a skype group for lone lolitas or just lolitas in general to socialize and whatnot?
I think it'd be nice to just have a group where we can meet other gulls, talk about new releases, share wishlists and whatever on a more personal level.
I'll leave my throwaway email so I don't shit up this thread.
Please email me if you're interested in this, or want to tell me how retarded it is.
I have two separate tumblrs - one for bondage and latex fetish, and one for jfashion. There's a shocking amount of crossover, which always freaks me out because I am terrified I will reblog something while logged into the wrong account. There are a couple accounts I had to unfollow because their posts were almost a 50/50 split between explicit fetish porn and coord reblogs and it made me uncomfortable to see the two things mashed together.