>Unfortunately your application was unsuccessful on this occasion.

>this sets the tone for the rest of your life

Not everyone can win, OP.

>>1085513
I've gotten tons of those. Keep tryin op.

>>1085513
Buy ethereum

>interview with HR
>she's got the voice of a brick wall
>she's very somber and depressed sounding
Ah this sucks

>>1085513

Really hate that shit.

Man I wish we lived in a world without lies:

> Sorry but your resume sucked, it makes you look like a noob
> Sorry but you are too young, we need someone older
> Sorry but you are overqualfied for this job and we dont wanna pay you that much
> Sorry but we picked someone related to the owner
> Sorry but we had to hit a quota for black people

AT LEAST THEN YOU WOULD FUCKING KNOW WHAT TO CHANGE ON THE NEXT JOB APP


GRRRRRRRRRR

>we are an equal opportunity employer

>so we won't hire you cuz you're white

"Thank you very much for speaking with us, anon. We will let you know of our decision regarding your application in one or two weeks. Enjoy the rest of your day."
> when you hear this, you've been weeded out

"Thank you for speaking with us today, anon. We will forward your information to so-and-so, and you should hear from him within a week. Enjoy the rest of your day."
>when you hear this, you've passed the screening

>>1085731

> Equal

They should replace that word with "prejudiced"

>wanting a white colar job

Work for your money faggot

>>1085940

The point of 'working' for your money is to be able to stop working. It doesn't matter how you make it as long as it's legal.

File: 1425596662765.gif (654KB, 245x245px) Image search: [Google]

654KB, 245x245px

>>1085615

>>1085731
boo hoo

>>1085940
>the ground is too soft

>>1085513
Fuck, that armpit-pussy is god-tier

>>1085513
Hiring manager here. Biggest truth of a job interview? It is the *last* step in the hiring process. You have no idea how depressing it is when you go through 200 resumes that a shit recruiter forwards for a single entry level position and find that not a one has a goddamned idea what the actual job entails.

>>1086077
It's an entry level position, what do you expect?

>>1086133
For it to at least be in the ballpark. I manage the workforce operations team for a large MSO's sales centers. 1600 heads, plus another 500 or so vendors. If you've ever done call center work, you know what "workforce" means. The specific title is "workforce administrator."

I don't need the resumes of 50 secretaries. I don't need 50 resumes of people with no experience in administering a schedule. I sure as hell don't need drones who shotgun their resume out at every Monster.com listing in the world.

For me is, I always look for shift managers from fast food franchises. They know how to manage schedules, they know how to do basic payroll. They know how to communicate with HR and coordinate in busy times. They may not have done it to this scale, but they know the nuts and bolts of it, and often they're ready, whether they actually know it or not.

>>1086189
To clarify, I should have said "The specific title in this case is "workforce administrator.""

Others I've had to deal with? "Forecasting coordinator." What does that mean? I do NOT need 23 wedding and event planners (true story.) I sure as fuck don't need a meteorologist (even more fucked up true story.)

>Dear Anon

>Having reviewed your application for the position as Composite materials engineer, we regret to inform you that we have decided to continue the selection process with other candidates who, based on an overall assessment of professional and personal competences, we find to be a better match for the position.


Fugg

>mfw my boss got promoted and I applied for my boss' old role
>required 3-5 years experience, I had 4 but had only been at the company for 1
>end up making it through 3 rounds of interviews
>passed up by an outside hire with 20 years of experience
>20 years
>TWENTY YEARS
>tttttwwweeeennnntttyyyyy yyyeeeeaaarrrrsssss

I'm at peace with it now because it's not like it was his intention to cockblock my career like that, he's just trying to make it in this world too but COME THE FUCK ON

>>1086189
> entry level job
> "i don't need someone with no experience."
> expecting quality resumes from people who are applying to answer the phone for $10-15/hr.
> thinks people ought to know some hidden meaning of "workforce."

kill yourself. We spotted the retard and it's you.

>>1085513
>you didn't receive a reply at all

>almost all of my resume is fake
>I'm glib and charming and speak in the most glittering of generalities about my 'previous jobs' in interviews
>most of my interviewers love me and want to hire me right off the bat
>if any of them bother to call my references or try to verify employment, I've hired firms that will play along with me

I've been looking for a job for three months and I keep getting better and better at faking everything and, as a consequence, keep getting better and better job offers. Look into it.

Getting a job is like getting a gf. You have to have one to get one.

>Rejected by McDonalds
>Rejected by Supermarket
>Interviewed for many big ticket item sales jobs
>Fair few offers
>Still receiving calls 3 months after accepting a job

I hate sales though, what have I done?

>>1085513
Ok I left my pisspoor retail job on bad terms, do other retailers actually call your references?

>>1086620
Just don't get married

Then the party's over

File: 12112342563.png (3MB, 1920x1080px) Image search: [Google]

3MB, 1920x1080px

Dear Anon,

Thank you again for applying to Summer 2016 X Institute Program. We appreciated the opportunity to speak with you over Skype. While we were impressed with your qualifications, we are unable to move forward with your application at this time.

Nevertheless, we hope you will continue to take advantage of the many opportunities in whatever work you choose. That’s why we’re excited to introduce you to the X Foundation. The Foundation supports educational, professional, and volunteer resources at the X as well as other organizations and can help connect you with additional opportunities to get involved.

We invite you to share your interests and goals with the Foundation by completing this short questionnaire.

In an effort to make sure you get connected with the right resources, you will be asked to select your interest in other job, internship, and career development opportunities. Upon completion of the survey, a member of the Foundation’s student relations team will ensure that your information reaches representatives from relevant organizations who can guide you toward a variety of new and exciting next steps.


Sincerely,
X Foundation

>>1086617
Can you share some more specific tips?
Do you use Fakeyourjob or Careerexcuse?
Your wisdom would be greatly appreciated

>>1086599
My team *runs* call centers, we don't take calls. And our starting salary for an entry level applicant is $36-40k a year.

I don't need experience, I can teach the job. What I need are people who at least understand the general function of the position. When I say "administrator," again, I'm not looking for secretaries. Apparently you're too retarded to understand that "workforce administrator" is a clear-cut title. Workforce, a force of people who perform work. Administrator, a person who engages in administration. Workforce administrator, a person who administrates a workforce.

Then again, what do I expect from NEETs and bronies like yourself who can't be bothered to google shit.

>>1085723
The reason it's this way is because companies can get into a lot of trouble (legally) for discrimination by telling the truth. It really is a crappy world we live in.

>>1085723
>sorry someone found a friend and we didn't look at your resume.

>>1087806
Just stop with your fucking autism.

>backpedalling this hard

>>1086392
how can he not know that he's cockblocking your career when the job requires 3-5 years of experience and he has 20? he's a dipshit for applying to lower level jobs and fucking legitimate candidates over.

>>1086392
That's nothing. I applied for my boss'said job when he retired. I had 9 years of experience, knew the system inside out, had contacts with other agencies we worked with, and was looking long term. They brought in an outsider a couple of years away from retirement and could barely get into his e-mail.

After I left, they hired a DBA who couldn't do SQL, a paint sniffer, and an H1B that suddenly bailed 2 weeks in.

>>1086189

You're a retard, your workforce is probably shit because you hire based on your already establoshed prejudices.

Yes sifting through shit CVs is a lot of work but if you're too lazy and stupid to pick out ideal candidates that's your problem.

File: downhill.jpg (7KB, 215x249px) Image search: [Google]

7KB, 215x249px

>>1085513
FUCK MY LIFE THIS KEEPS HAPPENING TO ME

>>1085975
Kill yourself.

>>1085513
I always message them back and ask for specifics.

>>1086392
you got fluffed. the job was already his. they needed you to make it look real.

>>1087806
>administrator
>entry level job

Again, you're not going to find people with entry level administrative work... If they have it, they've already entered and moved up and will not be applying for your entry positition.

File: giphy.gif (485KB, 500x297px) Image search: [Google]

485KB, 500x297px

>>1087843
>tfw you're that friend

File: unrele10.jpg (42KB, 538x434px) Image search: [Google]

42KB, 538x434px

>>1087806
While we're pretending

ETH IS GOING THROUGH THE ROOF
/biz/ MADE MILLIONS. HUNDREDS OF SUICIDES PREVENTED.