>claims to be /biz/ >still uses a mouse to navigate Excel

>>1035417
>Muh hotkeys
Enjoy being an excel monkey for the next 18 years.

>>1035417
>2016
>Using Excel

>>1035417
Jesus christ who the fuck cares? You will never make it with that nitpicking attitude.

>Claims to be /biz/
>Uses non-free, proprietary software

I only use libreoffice, fampai.

>>1035482
fucking linux... shake my fuckin head

I'm a manager and I'd personally never hire anyone that doesn't know how to use excel without mouse

>>1035417
Using excel and not r or python

>>1035417
shkreli had pretty good excel skills

pretty good getting arrested skills too

>>1036409

>TFW you're a manager but you still cannot get over your autistic l337 tendencies

File: 1449379874883.gif (2MB, 750x750px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 750x750px

>>1036409
>"you're autistic as fuck"
>ctrl + c
>ctrl + shift + dwnArrow + rightArrow
>ctrl +v
>"Here's that report you wanted, boss."

>mfw excel can't use enough memory to finish my report.

>>1035417
>claims to be /biz/
>uses excel

>not using a RDBMS
>not using constraints, foreign keys, (materialized) views, triggers
lel

>>1036490
>claims to be /biz/
>actually being a productive member of society

>>1035417
I use an intern for that

>>1035482
enjoy your macros and scripts that won't work for anyone else

>>1035417
Excel thread? Cool, I need to learn that fucker fast, I'm working towards an actuarial career. Any tips? I'm gonna have to pick up V Basic as well.

>>1036412

>not mentioning dat sweet PR skills and evading arrest playing chess and tinychatting all while sitting in your shitty apartment skills

>2016
>still using Excel and not creating your own applications and reports in Python

Have fun being replaced in 10 years.

>>1035417
touchscreen

>>1035452
>>1035482
>>1036413
>>1036490
>>1037354

Like it or not, Excel is the #1 thing needed in a business career. Fedora level in obscure thing no one in the room has heard of? Sorry we will pick the guy who got a certificate in Office from his local CC.

If you can not do a basic Vlookup or quick Pivot table in front of me, in less than 5 minutes, from a 20k line Excel file, we really have nothing left to talk about

Libre and Open do not convert properly to Excel. Any company worth 3 employees already has Volume Licensing from Microsoft. Learn Excel or be laughed at after we hire your much less qualified counterpart

>>1036409
Lol that can't possibly be true. no one who has ever worked in an office could think this could pass off as an actual manager

>>1035417

topman
at least that summer at BAML was good for something

>>1036483

that does nothing except input in your single-main highlighted cell

>>1036644
Knock yourself out.
https://exceljet.net/keyboard-shortcuts

>>1035417
>butthurt wage-slave in denial detected

>>1035417
>Claims to be /biz/
>Is entry level paper pusher

>claims to be /biz/
>still ranks so low on the totem pole that he requires spreadsheets for his job

>>1038617
Fucking hedge fund managers use excel on a daily basis you idiot.

>>1038637
Sure, but do they use a mouse?

>>1038637
>only being a hedge fund manager
Pretty pathetic desu

>>1038050
Excel monkey detected.

>still uses a mouse
Should have stopped there

>>1036495
>still using RDBMS that require 25k/year service contracts or licenses
>not using map reduce, cassandra, noSql.
kek kek

>>1039282
>doesn't know that you can dump data from an RDBMS DB into a NoSql DB for processing while still retaining data integrity
>doesn't know the value of referential integrity
>has no clue what ACID is or why it's important
>doesn't understand the difference between canonical and document DB

it's like you don't know what you're talking about

>>1036495
avoid triggers at all costs, my friend. I only use them if there's some anal/autistic auditing requirement

>>1039282
Mysql is free fukboi I use amazon rds u big pussy