What have you done that you will never tell anyone irl

I fucked some bitch with a knife in little rock. No harm came to her, but she wasn't ok with it. But what was she going to do? Say no? I had a knife.

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>>673200365
Mein Negro

i go on 4chan, and have, in my darkest and most boring hours tried to troll people.

>>673200525
I kinda miss her tbh fam. Love you alexis!

I get sexual pleasure from shitting my pants.

I posted pasta and liked it.

When ever I go to a females house or a house with a female living in it I always steal a pair of panties. Swiped a couple dildos and vibrators too.

>>673200783
Made skills.

Hope they were soiled panties.

I listen to AMSR before I go to sleep. Chicks kissing ears or whispers in your ear. Porn would be no problem, I don't care about that but this is straight up loneliness

>>673200853
Some are some arnt.

>>673200783
They know.

I got really drunk and pissed on peoples cars. I also took a dump in the middle of a park.

>>673201017
hahahahahahahahaha

Classic

I got drunk one night and jerked off in my friends little sisters bed.

>>673200033
Kieran Lee?

fucked a couple of shemales, and fucked a couple of guys/got fucked

I guess im Bi, but only on the physical level, i dont develop feelings for guys/shemales

>>673201148
How old was the sister?

Basically, when I was 13-ish, I discovered matrubation. I decided to show that to my cousin. Tldr, downloaded porn on my phone, went to my place, he stayed the night. We masturbated while lying on a bed and watching porn on my phone. No gay shit tho. There was no contact.

Posted a girl on /b/. Someone recognized her. Spread like wildfire. Fucked things up for her.

I used to physically abuse my ex when we were together. She is the only girl that I ever got so angry with that I started hitting. She is Asian BTW

I'm not that type of guy so I'm not ever telling anyone about this dirty part of my life

rented this milf's house for a week while her and her family were away

jerked off with all of her panties every day

>>673201148
Hot

>>673201277
She was probably 13-14. She wasn't there, and I wasn't thinking of her, but it was an empty bed and my penor needed touched.

>>673201292

Let me guess, the person that recognized her was all like

>I know her, she goes to my school

I liked a girl and i kissed it

>>673201497

Good ol Senor Penor, always looking for touched

I sucked a dudes dick in high school.

I'm not gay though. I like women.

>>673201293
>not that kind of guy

You are what your actions say you are anon.

No amount of denial will change the fact that you are in fact "that kind of guy."

>>673200033
one time I entered Disney.com without my parents permission

>>673201497
What a waste of a good loli bed.

>>673201620
XD hahahahahahaha perverts!

There should be a law against having that much fun.

>>673201572
>it

When I first descovered fapping, I used to rub it against the side of my thigh cuz it was too small to jerk off
> inb4 cuming.

Kek

>>not gay tho

sure

>>673201621

I stuck my wiener in my sisters vagina. She was 3 and I was 4 and she doesn't remember.

>>673201629
Taking the bait

>>673201621
its like riding a bike and saying that its a tank.
You are fag deal with it

>>673201621
Totally not gay.

>>673200033
Pretended I was 15 on /b/ to troll people.
I got banned

>>673202004
Loooooool epic troll bro X D

>>673201506
Coworker saw. He told everyone including her and she (rightly) blamed me

>>673200365
>I fucked some bitch with a knife in little rock
>The bitch in little rock, whom I fucked, had a knife
Or
>By means of knife, I fucked a bitch in little rock.
Tbqh fam, ur grammar needs work.

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>>673200033

Every time my wife leaves the house I fantasize about how my life would be if she died in a car wreck.

>>673201972
trust me she remember and gonna use it if she need something from you.

I had similar situation, but I told her that breaking leg or arm is not that hard, and she should know what she should remember and what not

>>673201268
Don't reformat and call fbi

>>673202179
>2016
>thinking your nudes won't go anywhere
bitches are sofa king we tod did.

Used to feel up my cousin when she would sleep over. She was a real heavy sleeper.

>>673201881

So if a gay guy has sex with one woman, and doesn't like it, is he still straight?

Obviously not you inbred fuckwit. It's about what you enjoy

>>673201621
>im not gay

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>be me
>27
>grave digger
>rainy day so they send other guys home
>ask me to help around inside the office
>say yes bc lots of hot girls work in office
>be cleaning bathroom
>9/10 thick milf needs to use the bathroom
>come out so she can go in
>she comes out minute or so later
>I go in and see 3 or 4 droplets of piss remnants on the seat
>close door and proceed to slurp it off
>jackoff afterwards

It was a great work day

Sucked a dick

>>673202189
>implying I give a fuck.
And what fun have you had with life?

My family thinks I'm the "innocent" youngest one. They don't know I'm drunk about 80% of the time, including at work, that I do drugs, and that I pick up girls on tinder to slap them around in bed and call them whores and sluts. Kinda goes hand in hand with them not knowing I have horrible depression and bipolar tendencies.

>green
>text
>your
>fucking
>stories
>shit

I once pissed my pants in primary school, right at the end of day. A girl saw me. Next day she asked if I pissed myself, I played it off and said it was someone else.

>>673200033
>>673200033
I've never taken a life but I have saved many.

>>673202349
you mean put that in hidden folder in his PC in case he would fire you and you need to take that fag out(by calling fbi and sending from this pc mails with that images from 10min mail)?

>>673202497
i threw up a little

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I let my older cousin pump my pussy full of cum on the regular..

>>673202497
Nectar of the Gods!

>>673200033
I was horny once so I tried putting my dick in my cats mouth.holding her down and jacking off

>>673202692
Sure if he's the blackmailing type

>>673202735
Titsorgtfo

Saved up my cum for a week came in a shot glass and invited a female friend over for some drinks shit was so cash

>>673202735
green text now please

>>673202428

what the fuck are you trying to say?

>>So if a gay guy has sex with one woman, and doesn't like it, is he still straight?

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>partying in town
>had to take a shit
>toilets on bar is gross
>went to sis appartment (she lived 5 minutes away, had her key, she wasn't home)
>was in front of her appartment building
>appartment is on 4th floor, couldnt hold poop no more
>rush to the public bassment room (public washing machine etc)
>took world largest dump in the middle of the floor
>mfwactuallyproud.jpg thats one large pile of poop
>laundry rack with clean clothes beside me
>takes the white Hilfiger polo
>wipe my ass
>hilfigerpolonotwhineanymore.gif
>giggled and went back to party

Once night I was partying in town and I had to take a huge fucking dump. All the toilets in the bars are gross and my sister lived 5 minutes from town so I wanted to go to her place and take the dump (she wasn't home and I got key). When I was at her appa

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>>673202892
Tits

>>673203127
lol forgot to delete the non greentext sry

>>673203138
Alrightalrightalright... Touché anon, touché guess i lost this one :(

>>673203138
timestamp mfw your thick n hot

>>673202497
I hide in women's toilets and film them on he toilet. Afterwards I always pay a visit to lick up the piss drops or swear on the back of the seat rim.

Additionally if it's a number two I like to taste it by sweeping it of the toilet with my finger. As I'm smelling it I thumb my ass

>>673202655
Hey guys, found the E.M.T.

>>673201875
I did that too!

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>Be me 16
>Best Friend get a GF
>Told me that she is Suicidal
>Told him that she is just a Attention Whore
>Got her Number to Text her
>She was a pretty nice Person
>She texted me, that she is Suicidal
>Told her that she has to Prove it
>She send me pics about her Knives and stuff
>Texted her that she is just a Attention whore and that she should fuck off
>She Got Angry and said that she would kill herself now.
>Didnt even respond in this
>Days later, my Friend was Sad and he said that his GF killed herself
>Ohhshiit.jpg

She killed herself to prove me that she is Suicidal.

>>673202655
I too post about how awesome Trump is on /pol/

>>673201398
>good one

>>673203057
Then how would you blackmail?

>>673203823
>retarded capital letters
are you German?

>>673202575
Are you me?

fisted my best friend's gf , she was drunk af

>>673203964
Kek

>>673202964
Not much to greentext unfortunately. I just have a thing for wincest. Mfw /b/ did this to me.

I came on my sister once. She was sleeping.

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>>673201268

Me and I cousin made out in her room when we were 10-11

Ive derailed several threads on /b/ by way of spiderman memes

>>673202024
>its like riding a bike and saying that its a tank.
its like riding a tank and saying that its a bike.

>>673202371
She sent them to everyone too.

>>673204221
have u fucked any other family members or just cousin ive fucked my stepads sister

i've let a midget suck my cock! And was fuckin great

>>673204465
You are one of the only remaining good things about 4chan, love you anon

>>673204590
Two of my cousins. Brothers none the less

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>>673203127
top kek

I cheated on my wife with 3 seperate times because she's frigid and I'm a closet polyamorous pansexual. No I don't feel guilty. No I don't think monogamy is for everyone.

>>673204817
i want to fap over you, can i get a pussy pic please, i find it hot that youve done it aswell, <3

>>673200365
You fucked her, and you had a knife, or you actually stuck the knife in her pussy?

>>673201874
>not getting the katy perry twist

>>673200365
I shot a man in Reno just to watch him die.

>>673204984
Maybe lemme see what i can do here. Im currently in bed w my stupid ex husband, and i really dont want him to see me whoring for /b/

>>673204936
$5 says she's got a dick

>>673202712
lmao

>>673204028
The worst is that they all think I'm weird as fuck for my views on relationships and being kinda /r9k/ mode when it comes to pessimism about that kind of shit. Every time they bring it up they mention how weird it is that a "virgin" is so opposed to dating. I don't know why I continue to lie about it. At 25 it just seems kinda silly but it's like I don't want them seeing inside me.

>>673204676

Why WOULDN'T you go around telling people that? I'd tell everyone I knew!

>>673205176
I was once a man in Reno who was shot. I was shot just to watch him shoot me.

>>673205113
I stuck the knife in her pussy.

>>673205226
okay babe, il be on this thread till it goes down, see what u can do, im hard already, or if u wanna do it private we can exchange pics via kik, let me know your username or summit, x

>>673201293
Well, sometimes bitches don't listen.

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Im the person that created this.

>>673202735
vids

>>673203127
underrated post

>>673205616
is that a fucking leg?

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>>673204984

>>673200033
I touched my pp

>>673205566
Take it to /soc/ doubledubsfag

>>673200033
I jaywalked.

>>673201268
FBI fagglord

>>673200033
masturbated to childporn

>>673203057
how the fuck can't it be illegal to own cp stuff in your country?

>>673201629
I beat my ex-wife a couple of times. I have had ten to twenty relationships, depending on how you're counting, and she was the only one. I have never once regretted beating her. Not only did she richly deserve it, she pushed me to the point that she should have known what had to happen. She got re-married, and committed suicide right after she had a baby because, well, she just did fucked-up things all the time.

>>673205770
ohhh fuck! one more alittle more our so i can see the whole lot clearly to wank over mmmmm if you can ofc xxx

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>>673201286
Your tl,dr was longer than your first sentence....

>>673205820
idk what kind of "hip" that is but you need to reconsider this whole posting int /b thing.

>>673205904
stfu u absoloute edgelord

>>673202329
The fuck is she going to do? He was 4 at the time. lol

>>673201749
>13,14
>loli
Are you retarded? 13 and 14 year olds have tits and ass already you dumb faggot.

I pooped and peed my diaper in a coffee shop. Then I sat there and let people breath in my stench while I finished my coffee then left. I've used my diaper in public on many occasions actually. Ordering food at McDonald's, Buying stuff at Wal Mart, at the local fair. More than I can count

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Good try fbi

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I had consensual sex in the missionary position for the sole purpose of procreation. With the lights out.

1)tortured a small cat by putting a bag on its head and raping it with a metal thingy.
2)fingered a girl who was black out drunk in bed and there was people in the room, pretended to be drunk to get in the bed too.

prolly some other stuff but I forget.

>>673206169
>mfw newfag thinks edgelord is very effective
>it wasn't very effective
Also rule 14, fys ty

>>673205616
Bro...

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>>673206308
>for personal use

When I was like twelve or thirteen, I used to get in these big crowds at Mardi Gras, where everyone is brushing up against one another. With all that contact, women can't tell if you're feeling their asses or just getting pushed up against them. I'd spot a hot woman, work my way over there, and start feeling her ass. I only got caught once. Woman wheeled around on me, and I looked at her like, "What?" She was almost old enough to be my mother.

>>673206474
Why would you do that to a cat? Where did the intention to do so come from?

>>673202179
Did you confess it was you?

>>673202179
"HEY I FOUND THESE RANDUM NUDE PICTURES OF ANONENTE"

yeah i dont think anyone with a job would do that

>>673206627
dunno tbh, it was a dark time of my life where i had extremely destructive behaviour, towards myself and other.
I regret it.

>>673205770

I fucked and sucked off one of my cousins, too. Loved it.

>not a girl

>>673204984
I like the taboo personally. Also i dont have kik, not really even sure what kik is.

>>673202735
Pic of you in your panties!

>>673205486
I prefer to use my dick. There are more nerve endings in it.

>>673206598
you're a fucking savage

>>673206845
Nuthin better than taking a hot load from a loved one.

>>673206077
Serves her right bro
Faggots saying women never deserve to be beaten should be beaten themselves Fucking white knights
There are 100 reasons to hit a woman

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>>673206353
>diaper
This a necessary thing or some sexual degeneracy?

>>673205226

Why are you in bed with your ex husband?

>>673201293
ever thought about suicide?

>>673206994

Hell yes, I loved swallowing it. Made me belly feel warm for hours. And I loved it dripping out of my ass, too.

>>673207010
Sexual thing. I get off on this shit

>>673206904
I did. I fucked her multiple times before and after this

At friends house, friends gf being bitch. Dog did poo on couch I partially hid poo. Outside drinking beers. Friends gf lays on couch. Gets shit all over her. Starts argument with my friend. Me out back smiling watching it all

>>673206077
>pushed me to beat her
>Not breaking up with her before she got you to hate her that much
>20 relationships
>relationships

You insecure faggots afraid to be alone. I hate losers like you. Stop being a bitch.

>>673200033
i had an homossexual sexual experience when i was about 12 and i've been repressing the memory ever since.
it's so repressed that i can't say it actually happened or if it was just a dream.
still, it's the only thing that haunts my existence.
no, i wasn't abused.

>>673207109
Long story. Helped him move and then got drunk n ate a bunch of shrooms.

>>673201293
Mind if I ask what her name was? did you ever go to jail for it?

>>673201263
Same man... I feels.

>>673207208
You a Thot

>>673207299

Diapers are hot.

>>673200365
LR arkansas?
Shit fam, 501 what's up

>>673207374
sounds like you were abused and you made up a story about it being consensual.
Wanna talk about it?

>>673207344
Subtle dude

>>673207475

A what?

>>673207400

Well, there's your problem. Don't get drunk and eat shrooms with your ex. Whore for /b instead. We love you and your cousin-fucking self. Would totally eat your pussy out after you fuck your cousin.

>>673207374
>homosexual sexual
Kek

I beat off with a condomed tool handle up my ass. I have never explored it, but I could be a practicing bisexual. It just doesn't fit my personality too well. One thing that fucks me up is that whatever I would get off on with a guy, I always want to do with my female lover. Like if I would cum hard getting fucked in the ass, I am totally into fucking her in the ass. If I would be happy with a dick in my mouth, I want to stick my dick in her mouth. Is there a name for this besides just being a general half-a-fag?

>>673207646
<3

>>673201286
>13
>had a smartphone
>underage b&

>>673207646
A thot. It's slang for a slutty chick or a hoe.

>>673207366
I'm not afraid to be alone. I love being alone. Bitches just get real motivated to be with me, and I'm weak about sex.

>>673200033
Ate my own shit while psychotic in a mental ward.

>>673202319
Get a divorce.

>>673205616
lol savage
moar pls
vola link?

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>>673202497

>>673207646
http://lmgtfy.com/?q=Thot

>>673207839

>mfw not a chick

>>673207735

Just saying, I love the cousin-cum filled pussy.

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>>673202578
>I have a short attention span
>Please im illiterate and dislike reading anything over 300 characters

Kill yourself

>>673206800
You reminded me of a dark time where I was super hostile towards my friends. Holy shit was I a dick. One of my friends was really depressed and needed almost constant support. I got tired of that position where she relies on me for happiness. Got really pissed and told her to fuck off. Right to her face. I shut her down for the rest of the week, and she didn't talk to anybody. At the time, I didn't feel bad and just tried to ignore what I did. I feel like a cunt now.

>>673207516
What's good nigga, north lr reporting

>>673206025
did you only do it once, and in that case how did it makes you feel?

>>673205770
i fucked my cousins a lot as a kid, the older one mostly though. Lots of fun :) too be shes ugly now

>>673200971
this tbh

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>at magfest
>friend working security
>his stickler brother is security also
>rail some blow in our room
>stickler bro is DARE fag.
>know hell report.
>put some coke inside his duffle
>DARE fag comes back
>sees me railing coke
>threatens to report me
>ask him why he has coke all inside his duffle
>outplayed.jpg
>buried a nut deep in his girl later that day too
>she's prego now
>probably mine
>noshame.

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>>673208006
Me too

I used to do lots graffiti in the toilets at work and in the meetings I would offer solutions to stop it.

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I.... I forgot about Dre :'(

>>673202189
It was the knive's idea.

>In HS got drunk with a friend
>mutual blowjobs
>learned two things
>not my thing
>my dick was bigger than his
>he even commented (foind out it wasn't his first rodeo)

first and only time I did it, but the ego boost sorta made it worth it.

>>673208103
Hey ugly girls need love too. Why not give her the ol' in out in out, you know, for old times sake?

>>673207521
as i said, i can't remember it fully. or at least i dont want to. but i'm pretty sure it was consensual. it happened more than once i think.
my mind immediately forces these thoughts to disappear when i think of them.
i literally spam my head with "it didn't happen, it was a dream" every time i remember it

>>673208196

I've also sucked off a dog. Tried to get him to mount me, but that's difficult to do solo.

>>673208190
this

>>673201621
Only gay if you swallowed

>>673206090
>being this much of a desperate, pussyslave, beta fuckboy.

>>673201263
>on all levels except physical I am straight
>[sucks cock]

>>673208558
child abuse confirmed.

You done got raped, son.

>>673208716
From what i understand, dogs cum buckets but its more watery than human jizz..is this true?

>>673208806
>careface
>gimp
>gocryifugotissues

>>673207699
bisexual switch, maybe

>>673208882
he was one year older than me. we never talked about anything of this kind. so i think it's a dream that my mind exaggerated.

>>673208914

Yes, very true. Tasty, though. At least, I enjoyed it. Not quite the same as human cum, easier to swallow.

Put several eggs inside of a toilet cistern and wrote abusive messages on them. Waiting for someone to find them one day.

>>673202575
you've just profiled the majority of /b/ m8

>>673208815
Fuckin kek

>>673208914
>from what i understand
you know you fucked a dog and know first hand how his cum was

>be 7
>spending the day with uncle
>he asks if I wanna go out
>we go out to a place where they sell toys
>as we're leaving he tells me we need to stop by his friends house
>be at his friends house
>uncle asks me if I like my new toy
>I say YES!
>he says I get to keep him but first I gotta do something for his friend
>he calls me to the bedroom
>tells me to pull my pants down
>I see his friend behind me
>uncle says it's ok and it's safe
>I do as I'm told
>his friend spreads my legs and starts prodding my ass with his dick
>I feel in shock because somehow I know I'm not supposed to be doing this
>uncle shows me my toy and says it will be worth it and I might even like it if I let myself enjoy it
>as he's saying that I feel like I'm taking a shit
>it was his friend entering my ass
>after a while he starts to thrust faster and faster until I feel him grip my hips and squeeze
>he slowly moves away and I feel my ass aching and feel something coming out
>I feel worried cause I thought I shit myself
>uncle says it's not poo and cleans my ass and shows me white liquid
>I'm about to pull my pants on but he says to leave them down
>Uncle comes behind me and puts me on the edge of the bed with my ass still out
>tells me to put my face on the bed and to push my butt up more
>I feel his fingers go from my balls to my ass and circling my hole
>I hear his zipper and next thing I know he slides in
>I hear him talking to his friend while he starts to thrust
>pulls out, tells me to turn around
>notice that my dick is hard for the first time
>I ask him if that's normal
>he says yes, it happens when your "happy"
>I lay on my back and he takes my legs up on his shoulders as best as he can
>Starts thrusting that way, fast and hard
>I start cumming without touching
>feeling worried but good
>I feel him cumming right after I do
>he runs a bath for me
>I clean up
>gives me my toy and tells me we need to talk
>gives me the sex talk
>we go home

>>673201712
Sick fuck

I did some stuff over in Afghan that I won't ever tell about. It feels like someone else did it, but it was me. I did two longer tours in Iraq, and nothing I did there came even close.
I trawl the rekt threads looking for something to disgust me, to make me feel human again and normal, but I've got nothing. Got a discharge from the RM, because they say I have a personality disorder now.
I'll never tell what I got up to even on here.

This guy I know always brings up my dick size whenever shit comes up, i'm actually just a bit above average but thick and I'm a pretty short guy so it looks way bigger on someone my size. (He knows because used to play football together in HS so had showered plenty of times). Anyways, I see no reason to correct him cause why would I? Its been like 6 years since then and he still brings it up.

>His Wife asked if I was really big
>I just laugh it off
>She says she has to know
>Fuck his wife
>Start getting facebook messages from random girls I dont know
>She apparently told some of her friends
>I am now fucking like 4 woman, 3 married, 1 engaged
>All cause this dude brings up my dick all the time
>lawl

>>673202319
Haha.....me too

I stole a soda once, 6 years ago

This fucking thread

>>673204269
I slept on my sister once she was cumming

my fiance insisted on no kids, demanded it, raved about it

our wedding night, I took off the condom, looked her right in the eyes and shot a load right in her pussy

she cried while I told her I would kill her if she got an abortion

a year and a half later, we're divorced and I am about to get full custody of our kid

ha ha dumb bitch

Fucked many animals.

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>>673209177

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>>673208382
confirmed faggoot

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>>673204936
> faggot using what ever the fuck nouns and adjectives he can come up with to describe his fucking fetishes

Kill yourself

>>673209286
hot!!

>>673202578
How?

>>673209400
say it, marine. you know you want to say it. it's been in you for years and you're looking for and opportunity to release it

>>673200033
I'm primal as fuck, i eat raw meat and drink blood, thrill of the hunt and all that shit
The thing i won't tell people is that I once caught a mouse and when it bit me I just bit it bottom half off, chewed it for a bit and then crushed his skull with my teeth. To this day I still feel the rush of that kill, small as it may be

>>673209533
You're happy that you got a kid?

>>673209286
Moar?

Drank my own piss. Kind of enjoyed it. Want to try it with someone else's, pretty sure I would enjoy it even more.

>>673209428
Here's to your Mr. Unknowing wingman friend. A true American her...

>>673209732
in a twisted way I do see it as hot now, but I lived with shame and weird fucking feelings about it my hole life. First time I talked about it was with my ex gf and she was the first to tell me it was hot and that I didn't need to feel bad about it. I don't think it was right, but I no longer feel bad that it happened.

Married a man and convinced him that I didn’t want kids.

On our wedding night he looked me t right in the eyes after taking off the condom and shit his load into me.

I turned on the tears as he tried to tell me he would kill me if I got an abortion.

At my bachelorette party I had sex with one of the black male strippers and paid him $1000 to fun inside me.

A year and a half later we’re divorced and my white ex-husband pays me $300 a month in child support and will for the next 17 years.

Stupid mother fucker.

have you guys ever told anyone irl that you browse 4chin?
I told one friend and made it look cool because he didn't know what it was.

>>673209092
Perhaps someday ill give it a try

>>673201621
My first sexual experience was with a guy, never did any other gay stuff and that was 15 years ago

Missionary position with the lights off

>>673203127
You're my hero

>>673210075
Rule 1 and 2 faggot

>>673210145
Same.

>>673210112

It's a lot of fun. I love the knot, personally. Having that knot in your ass while you get pumped full of cum is amazing.

i put 3 cucumbers in my butthole at the same time :^)

>>673210075
na tried to bring it up a few times, but never get any reciprocation so stopped saying kinda ashamed tho, b has made me think fucked up things and seen too,

>>673210284

That's impressive. Ever been fisted?

>>673210284
pic or it didn't happen

I occasionally post on Craigslist for older guys to fuck my ass. GF doesn't know, and no one would suspect I do this. I just like feeling submissive once in a while, and bring fucked well is an amazing feeling.

>>673209286
Do you still have contact with you uncle?

>>673210284
Like one after another or all stretching your asshole in a bundle?

>>673210280
Iv heard that before. But id be afraid of the dismount.

Voted for trump

>>673210459

Get your gf a strap-on?

Or suggest a threesome where you both get fucked?

>>673207516
AR is the worst state in the union. I hope North Korea bombs yall into vapor.

>>673201148
Caleb?

>>673210075
Like one or two people. I show my one bud funny shit from here pretty regularly, but play off all the fucked up shit as if I didn't come here for it- but we all know that we're here for that too. First rules are there for a reason... so much for Fight /b/ club.

>>673203964
kike detected

>>673202497
I'm just picturing a dripping wet grave digger creeping out the hot office girls, then as we would assume, he licks the toilet after one pisses.

Thanks.

>>673210599
Hard to explain. I'm not into the pegging thing, and not sure how to bring it up to the gf, although I know there are a lot of girls who are secretly turned on my male on male stuff.

>>673210858
Because you're a flaming queer, faggot.
>Hard to explain

I'm all about a girl that does strip tease. Her videos are hard to find now, not even on motherless anymore.

Lied about a car accident to my parents

>>673210639
Nope. But he sounds like a fun dude

>>673206077
Had same experience with my ex wife. She used to be violent with me all the time and I would just put up with it because I'm man, one night I just back handed her because she wouldn't leave me alone and literally broke down a bathroom door while I was trying to shit just so she could yell in my face about nothing. Went to jail, can't buy guns ever again. Have had about 6 relationships after her, never even came close to physical violence, she got ran over by her boyfriend during an argument, she wouldn't leave him alone and he was trying to leave got in his face and he reversed the car, she got pushed under the open door and her legs went under the tires. Dumb.

>>673209880
Not really. Nothing like that. I do have a few other stories but not like that. Here is one.

>be 7
>after the situation at my uncles friends house I didn't know how to masturbate so I would rub against things
>maybe karma but my uncle has 4 daughters
>one of them was my age
>we were playing one day and I rubbed against her and I realized I was getting that sensation
>I started to rub more and more against her
>she looked at me and asked why I was doing that
>I told her it felt good
>and as I was saying that I thought I pissed my pants
>rushed to the bathroom and realize that white liquid was all over my underwear
>clean it off and walk back out, keep playing
>days later I remember the sex talk
>she's over the house
>ask her if she wants to play doctor or house
>she says yes
>we "makeout"
>I start rubbing against her by instinct
>I tell her I want to rub against the middle
>have her on her back on the floor and I basically dry hump her
>I can't handle it anymore, don't know what I'm doing
>tell her to take her pants off
>I take mine off
>rub my underwear against hers
>still doesn't seem right even though it feels good
>I take my underwear down
>not sure why I didn't take hers off
>rub my bare dick against her crotch
>cum buckets
>even though I knew what it was I still freaked out a bit because I've never seen that much cum come out
>she acts like she's going to cry because she thinks I peed on her
>I somehow come her down and tell her I was just playing and that it was water
>she eventually gets over it and we continue to play

>>673210613
Whatever you say, you inbred piece of trash.

>>673209903
In a lot of ways I wish I could thank him but banging his wife and some of his friends wifes/gf likely wouldn't end well for me. I'm better in bed then in a street fight

>>673210498
Not as much honestly. He lives in another country now with his family. I talk to them more than I talk to him. But I do keep contact.

>>673200033
Once I was indiscreet and revealed my deepest, darkest secret on /b/ at the request of some faggot.

>>673202575
>>673202575
They know. They just dont want to get involved

>>673211068
Kek
Is it really so easy to be put in jail for hitting a woman?

I went to a bar in hopes of finding and fucking some chicks, but blacked out and I got hit on by a gay dude. Fair enough - I let him blow me. I was and still am kind of disturbed by that as I am straight and only find women attractive. I guess I was just curious and super drunk. FML

>>673200033
told some random faggot on /b/ something fucking personal

>>673211180
Send him a bottle of single malt on his birthday with a card that reads "Thanks for all the referrals", but no signature.

>>673203127
>>takes the white Hilfiger polo
>>wipe my ass

You're an awful human being, but the fact it was a white Hilfiger top means that whoever owned it was a WORSE human being, so... You did gods work, anon.

>>673211191
Ever talked to him about it?

>>673207699
Enjoying butt stuff doesn't mean gay.
>pegging

I taught my brother how to masturbate. Literally showing it in front of him. Now he's addicted to hentai.

>>673211369
She immediately called the cops and said 'my husband just best me' I took off from the house on foot, she followed and when the cops rolled up to the area, they yelled out the window 'hey' and she yelled back fuck you.... then I got arrested. Dumbest part is that she was violent with me all the fucking time and I never thought to call the cops, I just thought that since I'm a man I just have to deal with it.

>>673211468
haha, fuck I might do that although it feels more trolling then thankful, but damn that might just have to get done. I even know his birthday only because its exactly 14 days before my own.

>>673211103
Youre projecting. Seriously, what are the odds that every person Ive come across from Arkansas would be colossal fuck-ups with horrendous behavior? God dammit I fucking hate Arkansas.

>>673200033
Jerked off to so much childporn it'd make the vatican blush.

>>673206474
I strangled a certain cat several times. Not proud of it, would never tell anyone.

>>673211983
Beat me, not best me. Then got in a fight with a black dude while I was in jail for the night, guy wouldn't shut the fuck up and was continuously taunting and harassing this tubby college kid, after about an hour I told him to shut the fuck up, he stood up and puffed is chest out and gave me a 'what the fuck you say to me' shit, I'm not good at talking shit so I just hit him upside his head, cops came in and dragged him out and put him in a 3x3 cell for the night, wasn't suppossed to be a holding cell, just one of the tiny secure rooms you use to talk to your bail bond person or something

>>673207344
You're a gentleman and a scholar

>>673209950
>hole life

>>673201293
It's ok, Asians are used to this abuse. It's part of their culture.

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>>673200365
1. You fucked a bitch who had a knife
2. You fucked a bitch with the knife itself
3. You fucked a bitch while equipped with a knife

>>673212081
Trolling - Loch Dhu
Thankful - Ardberg

>>673207374
Same for me. I feel dirty even 20 yrs later

>>673201621
A little bit gay is OK anon.

>>673212746
All 3

>>673211668
No, it never comes up. I did end up talking to one of his daughters about it though. I guess his wife was snooping and looked at his phone and found pictures of him in drag, with a cigar in his ass. They were upset obviously and she kinda told me about it and I basically told her that that was nothing new, that he was always fucked up sexually, that he had some major issues and I told her the story and she was in shock and said she was sorry and all that.

>>673202575
I can relate to these feels anon.
>Feelbetterbuddy.jpg

>>673212671
lol on my phone and I'm not checking to see if the autocorrect is fucking up my shit.

>>673202575

So edgy.

>>673202422
Did you rest your benis across her face?

>>673205770
meh I'd hit

I secretly jerk off to shemale/trans porn, crossdressing porn, and some gay porn.

I'm not gay, i am just empty inside and feel no real emotion so it doesn't really bother me.

>>673200033
fuck trannys

>>673212746
#2 with the handle obviously.

>>673202189
this.

I thought he stabbed some girl in the pussy with a knife at first

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>>673213185
Ya but would you fuck it?

>>673205681
Moot?

>>673201712
Calling the police right now u sick fuck

starting when i was 8 i let my dog lick my pussy