ITT: we share our biggest problems with women and others offer advice
I can't seem to maintain an erection unless I have a deep emotional connection with the girl I'm fucking
What kind of problems do the rest of you faggots have?
My girls don't talk much.
Post orgasm I get depressed, and sometimes cry, I guess because sex seemed like the solution to all my problems, but then after I cum, my problems are all still, except now I have a new problem with tits and ass lying there next to me.
Whenever I get into an argument with my SO, she starts calling me names, telling me I'm a coward, lowlife etc.
Insults basically. And that angers me more and turns the fight uglier and uglier
how come my hands get so fuckin sweaty when i talk to girls and how do i stop it
like actual full size drops of liquid in my hands not just moistness
Mahnigga.jpg what's up with this? Me too. I'm thinking of ending it with the side chick because of this. But she buys me all sorts of shit. I'm starting to think it's because with the main she holds back and doesn't always want to fuck and that turns me on? How did u first realize this was a problem?
Developing an emotional connection with someone takes time, 6 months isn't that long.
Also it depends a lot on love, and you can't love someone deeply if you don't love yourself.
Do you love yourself anon?
>>669150554I love my girlfriend. But really gorgeous looking girl can't seem to get enough of me. I don't know why. I'm not that ridiculous good looking. But I just can't help myself. I just have no self control and end up fucking these women. It's a real problen
I can't have a one night stand. I don't know why. Recently i got a 9/10 girl on a bed, just couldn't get an erection which was really pathentic. Not like i don't have erections at all. I don't know..
I can break ice easily but I can't stay afloat. I get anxious that I'll run out of things to say or she'll get bored or I'll have nothing to relate with her. I'm good at responding to what a girl says but I need her to drive the conversation, like I need her to ask the questions until there's something that can hook me and I can take it from there.
Main reason I don't approach girls though is because I'm always thinking that the girl gets approached all the time and I'll just be a waste of her time, like I really don't want to bother her. I'm constantly thinking that she's thinking "For fuck sake not another guy".
Any advice? Apart from just man the fuck up and ask her.
My women look better anyway.
I am totaly capable of bring this one into bed. It's not the problem. It's the thing that when we reach the point when we have to start with the real thing i kinda get shy.. or whatsoever and i just can't get an erection.
Sounds like you're in a slump. Get your shit back on track and suddenly you'll become interesting.
I get too attached. Then I regret the relationship because I want to put my dick into every skinny chick with a nice rack but feel bad about ditching the current girl.
Recently dumped my GF of nearly 5 years (somewhat out of nowhere from her perspective) for a sexy filipina that's a decade older than me (she's in her early 30's). Feel bad for breaking my ex's heart, again, but god damn does this new girl suck and fuck like no other. She even pays for everything, ranging from food to gas to coke. Still I'm seriously contemplating fucking this other dime who has been interested in me for a long time, especially since I'm technically not in a relationship with this new one.
what do b
I'm a very abusable person, but since I've only actually had girls talk to me for the last 9 months or so of my life I have no sort of desire to stop them in fear they'll just find someone else to talk to
I feel like I lack giving a fuck. I'm being legit, too.
I can easily talk to most females without the issues a lot of people are posting, like anxiety, its just that I don't feel compelled to put forth the effort, or even I don't know what to talk about, so I don't.
Might just be me not caring about women right now, idk. Interested in hearing your thoughts.
You never know what's around the corner anon you should maybe try changing your social circle?
You can take pills to "turn off" sexual drive other than that stop thinking with your dick
It's just not your thing that's why ( I think)
There are a ton of different women and billions of people in this world I doubt that you end up alone anon
You probably should see a doctor, or jerk off more
If you can't get her to be more loving and stop insulting you then you might wanna gtfo of there. Not joking. Sounds like straight up emotional abuse, super unhealthy relationship.
You're not the only one. My girlfriend I love is fat. But she's so fucking cool and turns me on like no other. The other ones just don't do nothing for me. I have to do doggystyle sometimes and beat my meat to get it hard lol. I've even spit on their back to fake cum.
I've only had sex twice, felt like killing myself after both times.
I even played for both teams to see if that was the problem, like I'm attracted to girls and love the idea of having sex but the act itself is literally the most depressed I've ever felt
It could be that just we are not meant to do this kind of stuff. Dunno. I hope it gets better in time. Sometimes i feel that my girlfriend keeps me only with sex. She is not the perfect, but somehow she manages to make me crazy horny and turn on.
I'm a very likable person but apparently awful at sex, since the last 4 or so girls seemed to have left me for that reason
Have you talked to a psychiatrist? I'm serious it's not just for loonies
If sex is the only pillar supporting your relationship I think there might be some things to fix
Because meeting other people is impossible?
Videos or guide on the Internet? Or maybe compensate with some God tier foreplay. You could ask your sexual partner what she likes in bed and what can you do to pleasure her more
Went to a psych for something completely unrelated in the past, I have a very bad impression of them because of that. As a student and full time worker sex shouldn't be a concern anyway i guess, hopefully time takes care of it
i really don't know how to approach girls.
been in relationships for the last 8 years and i totally lost my suavity.
i mean, once i get to talk with a girl, 90% of the girls show interest and i can easily take it from there, but i just don't know how to start talking without looking like a normie faggot.
When you break up, maybe it's not her that you miss. You just miss the idea of being with someone.
Find someone else to be with. I know there's someone that will respect you properly.
I get dumped by every girl because i choose not to commit
And i never handle the rejection by just deleting them
I always beg them to come back , insult them or spam their snapchat with selfies to remind them how hot i am
And when i think i wont text them, i get drunk and i litteraly dont give a fuck and i start messaging them
Then, if i have absolutelty no one to fuk, or cuddle ill sometimes get drunk and call a guy on grindr just so i can feel some affection
I do not enjoy blowjobs. The feeling is not satisfying at all. Basically, it kills my boner. Maybe I havent found the good ones...
Obviously the girl is not happy : "What's going on Anon ? Is something wrong ?" I have no answer... I cant enjoy it and that's it. Thats a shame, everyone seems to love blowjobs...
Also I would love to be the one sucking the dick... Maybe that's the problem.
I mean, I might be gay or something, but I'm still attracted to girls. The lovely curves, the boobs, the ass : this makes me horny... But when it comes to blowjobs... I juste cant handle it.
What's wrong with me guys ?
read my post >>669152590
It's easy for me to approach girls. Compliment their hair, eyes, clothing etc. When a girl makes an effort to look nice, they like it when someone notices their efforts.
I can't seem to have any lasting relationships, and it seems the more emotionally invested I get the worst it ends.
>last relationship was short lived
>I felt strongly for this girl
>towards the end of the relationship I was hit with a heavy depression that made contact with anyone pretty painful.
>lose job and gf because of this depression
>FF a month later, we catch up and she's pretty aggressive to me.
>try to be friends, but she seems increasingly distant.
>turns out she thinks I've been lying to her the entirety of our friendship and relationship
>she calls me manipulative and tells me not too talk to her.
Girl before her:
>was just meant to be a work fling
>she develops feelings for me
>a little later I do the same
>she literally tells me she can't be with me because she's afraid of becoming attached
>am 100% sure she was raped by someone that she trusted.
>offers to tell me everything.
>tells me she has work early and can't do it tonight
>disappears from the face of the earth.
>two girls I'm not emotionally invested in keep throwing themselves at me.
>fuck because free pussy
I don't think so, the women I've been with have all had high sex drives and dropping mine isn't a good idea if I want to keep them. Especially this filipina, I have a hard time keeping up with her appetite as is (she considers herself a nympho though, so I guess thats not normal). Fuck I really want to keep this one around too, first non-white woman I've ever dated and my god is it what I've always been looking for. Cooks, cleans, foreplay for her is sucking my dick, loves anal, has a low number and despises one night stands (no slutting around behind my back). Incredible charm and bubbly social personality is a front she uses to get people to do what she wants, everyone but me. Loyal is an understatement. I do not want to lose this one.
My bad for the list, I'm just a little excited about this one.
Deal with your problems and let sex be an escape. Don't associate women or sex with any kind of solution. Ever. You'll only set yourself up to fall. A relationship will not supplement what you feel you may lack in life. Even if the feeling is being alone. You have yo learn to be comfortable with yourself.
I was in a 3-4 year long relationship. For 2 years during the middle I had little to no sex drive. It wasn't until I took steps to overcome my depression, and thus learn to love myself, that I was capable of truly, deeply loving my gf. After that the sex was out of this fucking world.
Also every girl I've had sex with since then I haven't been able to stay hard because I'm just not that into THEM, as a person, and thus can't seem to enjoy sex with them. Like I WANT to have sex with girls but when it happens I don't enjoy it because it's not with someone I have an emotional connection to.
This is coming from a bisexual dude:
Girls can't give blowjobs. Like, at all. They fucking suck at them. Fucking girls is great, but their blowjobs suck. Guys on the other hand normally give amazing blowjobs cus they know what a dick is like. I think it's normal to not get off much from girls giving you bjs. They just have literally no clue wtf they are doing, especially if you are relatively young (and they are too). Girls under 30 can't give bjs for shit.
I think you unconscionally ( don't know if that's a word) what a committed and serious relationship ( you want someone to be there for you to cuddle, sex, share things etc but you rationalize it and decide not to
My little cousin keeps sitting in my lap and cuddling against me whenever she was over and able. It was cute at first but now I'm suspecting my parents think I'm a pedophile. I don't ask her or make her do things she does but when I tell her to leave me alone or not let her sit in my lap she gets sad and some times cries until I give in. She acts like a kid but she's already 12 and going through puberty so lap sitting and cuddling an older sibling stops being adorable and begins to be creepy. Does anyone have any way to stop her without hurting her? I can't take the suspicious eyes and painful erections anymore
1. Deprive yourself of porn or any sexually explicit media for awhile and see if it increases arousal during sex. Sometimes what's available online can desensitize you in a way that makes real sex uninteresting.
2. Watch some gay porn, be honest with yourself, and see if it does anything for you. If it does, cool, if not now you know for damn sure.
3. Alter your technique, possibly to go slower and draw out the feeling rather than pounding away or vice versa.
Here is the last girl who dumped me lol
Look how cringe i am
>used to have gf that climaxed within 30 seconds
>was cool tho because I'd typically only last a minute
>now with new girl
>needs a romantic evening
>a candlelit room
>half an hour of intense foreplay
>then 10 minutes of clit stimulation to climax
>20 minutes of vag pounding to orgasm
>and close to half a fucking hour of vigorous g-spot rubbing to cum
>I still only last a minute max
>usually masturbates for literally fucking ages to finish herself
>I've offered to finish the job, but learned my lesson when I got goddamn painful ass carpal tunnel frigging her off for an hour
she says it's all cool and it's not my fault that she's hard to please, but I can't help feeling like a prick whenever I blast in her and she's not even a tenth of the way there.
I've heard stories from past boyfriends, guys who last longer than episodes of the simpsons, and even those cunts couldn't make the bitch cum.
what the fuck do I do /b/?
I've tried vibrating cock rings, tingly lube, tying her up (which she likes)
I'm out of fucking ideas.
anyone else have a girl that they just can't fucking please no matter what?
Well the weight gain can also be reflected in your demure. It shows that you don't care about yourself enough to not eat in excess or exercise enough to offset it. It also shows a lack of self-respect and thereby lack of confidence and it's common knowledge that women pick up on confidence on a subconscious level. Pyschologically speaking it's very possible that you're subconsciously punishing yourself out of guilt for having committed an infidelity and those unresolved feelings are draining your motivation and effecting your metabolism, but that's just a thought. Or you could be a dick or off-putting and just be unaware of it.
well, since my problem is with breaking the ice, not staying afloat, this is my advice:
ask questions. not like interrogation style, but until you come to a theme you are interested in. i like to play the guessing game with girls. they love to hear how someone they don't know perceive them, especially if they are a bit interested.
bonus: they will be impressed when you guess some deep stuff about them and you're right.
i will, eventually.
i can only maintain an erection when this song is on.
yea it could be
anyways, i have a story to tell:
>be me, 23years anon, average looking
>be few months ago
>haven't been in an relationship for 2 years or so
>really like one girl
>she seems to like me back (dafuq, amirite?)
>we end up talking dirty and i find out that she's really really into me and wants me to fuck her
>once I went to her town (our cities are 100 miles apart)
>I go out with friends and arrange that I'll meet her after we get out of the club (she didn't want to go with us, don't ask why, I'ts complicated and completely different story)
>cca 4am, mildly drunk (4-5 beers and 10 shots of tequilla through the night)
>she's sleeping (she earlier told me something sweet like "if I'll be asleep you MUST wake me up and come ;) "
>I wake her up
>walk up to her apartment
>we immediately start making out
>she is really in the mood
>I am too
>we kiss, we lay on bed, we make out
>I get a proper boner, start going down
>I'm licking her
>I lose my fucking boner
>I can't get it up anymore
Can't even describe you how embarrassed I was...
When they take it somewhere ugly you don't engage, you shut it down. You assert yourself calmly and sternly and tell them that you will not be spoken to that way and if they can't respect that then kick them out. No grey area. Don't put up with women who degrade you outside of a pre-discussed scenario.
My problem is that every girl Im with is fucking depressed, they seem fine at the start but a month or so though they start crying all the time and saying they want to kill themselves. Hell one time this chick was sucking my dick and started crying half way though, sure I pretended not to notice and let her finish but that's still fucked. This has happened to me with at least 6 different girls. Are all chicks just mental?
Learn to enjoy casual relationships with no strings attached and use it as an opportunity to learn what you really want and what you aren't willing to tolerate or overlook. Being lonely is also a sign that you may not be comfortable with yourself and that may be worth taking a look at as well.
I thought the same, but because of these experiences I can't find love anywhere else.
I'm afraid to open up too anyone for various reasons, coupled with the fact that as a panromantic man I fall for these broken people,
Each one every last one has made me feel like shit, and now when a person who would be good for me shows up I panic and push them away sometimes violently.
It's scary being alone and after this last relationship I lost the only person I could confide in and get an actual response besides, "don't worry you're young" or "you seem happy sleeping around."
was with a girl i barely knew last week, man she was gorgeous, but nah, half hard on was the best i could do.
if not interested in a girl's personnality or knowing her some more, not much is going down.
>We are the ZOHAN
I hung out with a really hot asian girl the other day and i just couldnt find the spark to be entertaining
I litteraly just complained and lied about shit the whole time
I was drinking before
But the last 3 dates ive been in ive been acting just not like a fun person
Like im still thinking about previous relationships and i just kinda was an uptite douche/sad faggot
Then commit, you're coming back to them anyway. If you feel like the relationship isn't working out, start talking to a new girl. Break it off with the old one when you have a new one to focus your thoughts and emotions on.
Some girls suck ass at giving head. I didn't enjoy blowjobs much till my most recent girl, before I could only come if I hadn't came in a week and was high (weed), now this new girl can make me blow my load even when I'm pumped up on a ton of adderall.
If you know how to make a girl fall for you, hard, then you could just be having a streak of bad luck. Some women are fucked in the head, I dated a girl that came out at as a schizophrenic a long time into it and it became clear why no matter what I did or how much she loved me, she would always fuck the relationship up. Wouldn't even realize she was doing it, thought it was normal. Move on. There are much, much, much better women out there.
I'm jealous of the girl's role in sex.
Sometimes I'd like to be the one sucking the dick, getting fucked, being a bitch.
I think I'd want to be dominated, instead of being the one dominating.
I'm not gay. I might be bisexual tho. Not sure...
bro, go look up some porn, and I mean REAL porn, not that normie shit that 12 year olds jack to because they've just discovered their dicks feel good to touch.
go find yourself a kink and do that shit to death.
bondage, roleplay, edging, submission, domination, lingerie, tittyfucking, underwater sex, deepthroating, asshole play, teasing, footjobs, nipple play, fuck you could go on and on.
find something you like, and try it, if you're thinking something like "oh nah man I'm vanilla as" then you legit just haven't found your fetish yet.
the internet is your friend anon.
Yea I understand that, but I really wasn't that drunk. I remember clearly everything through the night and I didn't puke or even feel like puking, not once. Besides, I had a long walk from the club to her place so that woke me up even more..
Stop worrying what they may think and don't overanalyze. If you run out of things to say just give them a chance to talk about themselves. They'll take it from there, you just have to maintain focus and occasionally comment or ask a question that keeps them rolling so they don't suddenly feel like they're yammering. Make them feel like they just captivate you. They'll feel a sense of importance and need and keep talking to you.
Damn. I didnt even care that she was hot. I was sad
Am comfortable talking to women in general. Am uncomfortable talking to women I want to pursue a relationship with/have sex with. As in, can barely make eye contact much less talk to them. What do I do?
Koneko was great until they threw out her established personality and made her a cookie-cutter neko girl instead of continuing to develop her.
"I'm stoic and standoffish with occasional vulnerable or open moments that make my character compelling and interesting. Season 3? I guess I'm just a clingy cat girl now with no consistent personality."
no, i didnt say "dont fuck when youre shitfaced"
i said "dont fucking drink".
like at all. one beer is alright, 2 beer might be already influencing your sexuality.
shit sucks, but for some people drunk sex just doesnt work.
Now that you mention it, you're right! There's been times I've told a girl my perceptions of them and they all enjoyed that conversation. I've never really capitalized on that "technique" of conversation. I guess I've always overlooked it. Thanks /b/ro
Uh you are right that 12 is a bit old for that, I think giving in to her crying or pouting might only - like most other kids - make her think that's a good way to get her own way. Especially if you are much older and getting uncomfortable erections.... Cut it out. I think a hug or two is not that weird though.
Stop looking for love and depth and start looking for fun. Not relationships or fuck buddies, just people to have fun with and hang out with . Let it happen organically and it will eventually come to you. If you actively seek love you'll just end up settling.
>fallen in love with her
>she doesn't care - only wants gifts
>she is lazily dating some shittyturd
>out of jealousy I told her "he will dump you soon after fucking you"
>I was wrong
>she dated him again because she wanted to fuck that phimotic shitstained turdpoo
>and again, and again
>and I'm now here cringing
ha, if I were into cuck shit, then yeah sounds good.
but funnily enough, one of the ex's was a black guy packing 8 inches and even that didn't do it.
she's pretty nonchalant about it, she's just tells me to go for it and cum whenever the fuck I want and rollover whenever I'm done.
I seriously think she's given up getting pleased by cock.
pfft yeah sure, viagra and a few months at the gym maybe.
if I take V, then my dick lasts fine, but literally every muscle in my body aches by the time I've gotten her anywhere.
fuck maybe I'll get V so the dick can stay hard and an 8 ball of coke to keep my damn energy up.
if I did coke that is...
Respect yourself and those who respect you will stay. Women come and go. Don't be afraid of being alone, we're all alone quite a bit at the end of the day. It shouldn't be something you dread.
I think I have problems with not liking myself. I know I am attractive but I just don't talk to girls I don't know why. Im not an autist. I try to have many talents like drawing and music, I don't even talk about/shove them down people's throats. Am I just insanely lonely? Ive had a girlfriend last year but she dumped me after a few months and i havent tried after that
no problem man.
granted, smart girls are easier to talk with, because they give you better responses and you can generally charm your way through a conversation easier when they actually understand your weird/witty sense of humor.
with shallow girls the guessing game is fool proof. i mean think about it, a girl you find attractive approaches you and guesses your character. i would want that to happen to me, this would be so much fun.
its like you've evolved the perfect beta psychosocial behavior
have fun raising the kids bitch boi
trying to hookup with a younger/hotter girl, i know shes interested what's the best approach to even a one night stand at the very least. i know i can pull it off but i don't want to fuck up.
>Recently dumped my GF of nearly 5 years (somewhat out of nowhere from her perspective) for a sexy filipina that's a decade older than me (she's in her early 30's).
Sir, You've Won the Turd Award.
>falling in love with girls who don't care about you
>falling in love with girls who fuck other guys
you are literally a beta, cut that shit out or you'll forever be a whiny little asshole pining over a girl who prefers good dick and doesn't give a shit about the douchebag attached to it.
I'm just oblivious to first encounters, couple of months ago i was buying fireworks so i plce my ID on the counter
"Oh i thought you were going to give me your number, hehe"
pay and leave, what the actual fuck goes through my head when i talk to girls?
Too hideous to get a grill; no amount of miracles, surgery (not that I would go down that kind of route), "magic" or whatever will help me.
Fake it. Do acting tutorials on youtube to build some confidence behind your role if it helps, but learn to present yourself how you want to be seen, even if it's not how you feel. It will get easier, I promise.
there is one thing you should NEVER do, which is remarking people around negatively.
positivity is key and sometimes the best thing is to just say what you think.
like "i hate it when i talk to a girl and i have no idea how not to look like an idiot once i do it. what do you suggest me to do?"
"alright, i have no idea what i should talk to you about. how can we make this less awkward and super fun for both of us?"
don't forget to smile and be confident about it.
she feels awkward too.
It's not really odd to be single for (less than) a year. You are mentioning good things about yourself, you just don't sound outgoing, which is fine but means it will probably be harder for you to meet a girl without having something in common already (like a class or mutual friends). Also, things like drawing and playing instruments aren't necessarily enough after initial impressions, because they're pretty solitary; unless you play in a band or whatever, or they also enjoy it at the same time, then you can build a connection off it. Maybe find an art group or events to try to find similar people.
So I've been fucking this girl I'm not that into everyday for the last couple weeks. We fuck, go out to dinner, go to parties together, text a lot. It's nice having a girl to do whatever with but at the same time I feel like I'm missing out on a more romantic relationship like I've had in the past. Do I break it off now or wait for someone else to come along before jumping ship?
Where do you usually try to get girls?
Make sure to sell yourself, all of yourself, well. Some things you never thought could be a turn on for them could be their number one looked for quality. For instance, this filipina I've been talking about gets turned on by me talking about my engineering classes, math and physics concepts, and explaining in depth seemingly "simple" concepts with what I've learned (she never went to college).
I can confirm this, all the women before this filipina (she's 30+, they're all under 30) sucked ass at giving head, she gives phenomenal blow jays.
That's actually on the table, I just haven't pressed for it yet. Filipina wants to watch me fuck the shit out of another hot girl while she watches and fingers herself. I figure a threesome is only a step away after that.
Start looking for chicks in entirely new environments. Look for ones that real goals in their lives and aren't push overs. If they're easy then they're not worth anything more than a one night stand.
Address the issues behind your depressing bullshit. Or find a girl that has the same interests as you, to focus the conversation on (might not work if you can't keep your mind off the bullshit).
May be time to cut your losses and take a trip. Spend some time with yourself or a buddy and reconnect with who you are, what you want and it'll give you a fresh perspective. Don't try to polish stagnation, it just gets worse.
Stop watching porn, masturbate using your imagination and only think about vaginal sex. Use a condom when you masturbate a few times to get used to it for when you have sex. And do kegels. Yours is a solvable problem.
Thank you for reading. I do think I have a self esteem issue. I do try to be open. Like people do know of my hobbies but idk why I don't talk about them that much with people Idk well. Maybe I don't want to feel annoying
I had a similar encounter, but I HIGHLY doubt she was interested... she doesn't seem like the type to date a dude like me.
> Goes to sign up for next semester college program; hot blonde working at the desk
> "Anon, I need ID to verify you"
> Hands over ID
> She looks over for a good minute or so
> "OH WOW! We have the exact same birth-date, huehuehue"
> LE ME says nothing, I don't even bat an eye
> She gives a light-hearted cough and gets super embarrassed.
> Grab my ID and walk off like a ... moron??? IDK whatever.. lol
Loving yourself is so incredibly important. As I stated somewhere else in this thread, you can't really love someone else if you don't love yourself first and foremost.
Find yourself a copy of "The Six Pillars of Self Esteem" and give it a read.
Also make a conscious effort to realize that the negative way we often talk about ourselves in our heads is ridiculous. You would never talk that way to a friend you cared about, so why do you talk to yourself that way?
This is like me... but without the kiss and 5x uglier than this /b/ro.... I do appreciate the comment though.
If you describe your technique or lack thereof I can help. Some basic improvements can be alternating between deep and shallow strokes as well as speed change. Change in sensation is key for a better experience.
Depends how she sees it going as well. If there is a risk she gets the wrong impression about how you feel you should probably call it off and have fun with someone else. You might also find yourself a bit monopolized by this one girl if you're spending every day with her, won't give you much opportunity to find anyone you feel more for.
I get what you're getting at from here and you're probably right, I was studying for exams at the time and went to get the fireworks when i had lunch, i remember being nervous going up the her at the counter but after that i was just focused on studying again, I'm too invested in everything else?
got other stories too but maybe another time
Dubs of truth
I was raised super conservative and basically have a hang up on her wanting to sleep around despite knowing she wants to marry me. In her defense I got her in Jr. High school so she didn't experience anything
Your relationship with your gf is in serious danger. Chances are she's going to find out, so you have to be prepared for that eventuality.
In the meantime FEEL long and hard what life would be like if your gf walked out of your life. Think about how every little thing you love about her and every little thing she does for you will no longer be there. Her smile? Her laugh? Her eyes? Her hair? The way she brings you gifts randomly without you asking just because she loves you?
Try to project your feelings into the future and imagine the feeling of life without all of that, and remember that if you fuck it up then chances are you won't get a second chance. Then, every time you're in a position where you COULD cheat on your girlfriend, remember that feeling, and ask yourself if a little Sally on the side is really worth it.
I am in college right now but I am a commuter but I am in an odd situation with my school that I dont really wanna talk about. But being a commuter makes it hard because I do want to meet new people, but idk whats holding me back.
I will definitely look up a copy, thank you I hope this helps somewhat.
The way you put it makes sense, I will keep that in mind thank you man.
Not same guy, but how would I go about looking into becoming more comfortable with myself? I honestly don't know what I'm missing. I have a good job, good grades, good family, fun hobbies, a shit ton of good guy friends, but I still feel lonely all the time. Never had a gf.
fuck me anon, I know those feels.
met my girl in senior year of highschool and my highschool had a shitty pick of the slut litter so only fucked one other girl. (much regret over her)
now I've been with her for like 5 years and she's talking about marriage and kids, and I still want to stick my dick in other 20-somethings because I missed out.
it's supposed to be my goddamn golden years.
she got to fuck guys before me, why the fuck did I have to tie myself down so soon?
Practice by getting girls you're comfortable with to fuck you. Get hotter chicks till you reach the ones you want to date. Sounds like a confidence issue in general, go work out if you don't.
Thanks? I guess?
Move or re-invent yourself.
I kind of have the same problem, maybe not to that degree but you should basically be prepared for shit like this to happen out of the blue, any time. Have some lines memorized to use on the spot, doesn't have to be anything special just not fucking creepy.
Wait for someone else. Absolutely no reason to ditch if they know you're just fuck buddies.
My girlfriend trusts me and clearly is not betraying my trust but I can't seem to trust her? Every time she goes out I always get anxious or nervous she's going to betray my trust, even though I know she wouldn't. How do I stop this from happening? I can't just grind through it because it's rotting me from the inside.
APD/"psychopath" here. I'll add some insight from my point of view.
Throw out your feelings when you find yourself into a girl. Locate their insecurities and use them. If a girl does not open her mouth when she smiles, she's probably insecure about her teeth. Make her laugh with a joke or something, or wait till she slips up and shows her teeth, and comment on how straight and white they are. She'll be taken aback and stunned, and putty in your hands from then on.
Of course, there has to be some degree of interest to begin with. Our teeth girl here needs to be someone you can talk to. The lonely ones are who will talk once you crack open their shell with a good conversation. Appeal to her interests. If you don't have it in common, make it in common until she's yours.
Ask her to try handjobs or ask if she'd be willing to watch instructional videos to try different ways of doing it. If so it'll be a fun experience. If not then she's a lame duck and the problem is chemistry, not sex.
Fleshlight and occulus rift is your answer
Then spice it up man it's on you to improve your lifestyle
You're welcome ( is it your or you're?) and good luck
It's about the rhythm maybe? Try Fleshlight
Watch some of RSDTyler's stuff on youtube.
Couple things I learned from my own personal research:
1) Conversation threading (notice keywords when people are talking, i.e. things you can use to thread the conversation elsewhere)
"I went to the beach over spring break and had a great time. The weather was so nice and warm and sunny"
Keywords: beach / spring break / weather - warm - sunny / great time
"Ahhh, so summer must be your favorite season? I prefer fall myself."
"Vacations to the beach are so great. I always wonder if I would get bored of them if I lived close to one."
"That's awesome, what was it about your trip that made you have such a good time?"
2) It's okay to let them talk. It means they're investing in the conversation, which is a good thing. Learn to be ok/comfortable with silence/pauses. Emotional states are contagious. If you're comfortable and relaxed, chances are she's comfortable and relaxed.
3) Embrace awkwardness/failure. Learn to not give a fuck and literally smile and laugh at yourself when you spill the spaghetti. This has been one of the most powerful mentalities I've developed the last year. It's amazing.
Let things happen naturally and don't have expectations initially. Let things flow naturally and find a balance between actuvely shaping relationships and allowing them to develop on their own. It's a good amount of trial and error but I used to deal with the same thing and even thought there was some fundamental flaw in me that prevented anyone from holding interest for very long. It get's better. You just cant be afraid of risking a relationship. You have to learn what works.
its a thing that just happens. it doesnt have much do with time spent together, sometimes i instantly feel this connection. sometimes after months of relationship i still dont feel it. i guess my mind just knows whats up with a girls instatly
I have two problems...initiating (who do I talk to? What do I say? How do I say it?) And then finishing (asking on date, getting number, etc)
Like, last year on my soccer team was this cute girl. We talked a bunch but I was too intimidated to ask her out because if she said no it would be been awkward as hell
And people always say to meet girls at the library. If I'm at the library, the last thing I want is people talking to me. Idk
I'm a male model but completely autistic. I'm so shy.
Only times I'm around girls is at work, but I get too scared to ask them out. My main fear is that I'll have to work with them again and it will be awkward if things go wrong. Modelling is actually kinda a small world and that happens a lot.
I'm also 27 and a virgin, so I'm really afraid of telling a girl that.
Stop looking at anime porn
Learn how to sell yourself. If you're creative enough and confident you can make anyone look interesting, including yourself.
I just got out of a relationship like this, nearly 5 years as well. Get friendly with another girl and move on. If it's meant to be then you'll get back together later on. Don't get married while you regret not trying out your fair share of pussy.
They become your every half. It gets hard to think for yourself. Every iteration of your future has her in it. You always know exactly what the other is thinking. She tells you to jump, you say how high. She bites you and mutilates you during sex, forces you to fuck her, you forget which way is up vs down and your world degenerates into alcoholism and drug abuse.
You need to take a serious and objective look at the kind of women you pursue and feel drawn to. Learn to avoid emotional fixer-uppers. You don't want to be someones emotional foundation or replace a family figure for them. It's not healthy for either of you.
If you love her it shouldn't be such an issue; yes other people are attractive, there are 7bil of them, chances are you didn't pick the shiniest prize, but if you can't step back and remember your SO's good qualities and just admire other girls from afar then you're in trouble. Do you maybe need something more from your gf? Experimentation? The other guy is right though if you're fucking multiple other girls likely scenario is she is gonna work it out sooner or later, so if you want to keep her, decide now and gtfo of everyone else and work on improving what you've got so it's enough.
stop cumming in her emotions and just fuck the damn pussy.
double the condoms, try some desensitizing lube, Viagra to stay hard, get intoxicated or make your feet really cold before fucking.
try one, or a combination, see what happens.
Sounds like you have problems with monogamy. Maybe you need to be upfront with girls and tell them right from the start that unless she's okay being in an open relationship that it probably isn't going to work out.
Open relationships are becoming more and more common these days. The idea of sex being sacred and monogamy are taking a backseat to sexual exploration and the idea that "making love" is actually different from a "meaningless fuck".
After a victory like that, try not to be eager. Hold out the carrot and let her come to you. Always keep the carrot just out of reach and she'll always move towards it.
Intimacy is also key. After flirting, do the triangle stare. Move your eyes from her left eye, to her right eye, to her lips, back up to eyes repeatedly. Drives them crazy. They'll find themselves making the first physical move. There's many ways to control women.
but I like her.
like I seriously enjoy the idea of one day doing the missionary position for the sole purpose of procreation with her, and getting those matching golden finger stranglers.
I fucking love this girl.
I just fucking wish I'd met her a good 5 years later.
Don't waste time trying to draw affection from people who don't wan't to give it to you like water from a stone. You'll live a miserable life and always be let down. Someone who accepts your attention but never reciprocates is just using you emotionally like someone might use another sexually without emotion.
Thanks /b/ro. Will have a look at his stuff.
I didn't know it was called "conversation threading". That alone should help a lot.
It's when there's a silence I dont know how to revive the conversation. But looking back at this thread, I suppose one way would be to just "start again". comment on something else about them, essentially re-breaking the ice.
I think "not giving a fuck" is the main thing I'm getting from this thread lol. I think I give too many fucks which is the reason I hold back
Relationships like this are SO unhealthy anon.
My brother has gone through the exact same thing with his ex. In all honestly the chances of getting back together and maintaining a lasting relationship with someone after THE FIRST breakup are incredibly slim, I'd say 10% roughly. After the second one that number probably drops to 3%.
I agree with the others. I think you need to start looking at some of the other fish in the sea, and show your ex that if she's going to be emotionally abusive and break up/get back together with you over and over (essentially treating the idea of being in a relationship like a fucking joke) then you're going to find someone else who WON'T treat you like shit and will treat your relationship like it actually means something.
Well the shy boy personality gets girls to talk to me but I'm always too shy to ask them out. And I'm only around them during shoots so I'm always afraid of mixing work and dating. Like afraid if I screw up, etc. I'll have to work with them again and it'll be awkward... and that's how I make my living.
Also afraid about still being a virgin. Should I tell them? Or just fake it and say it has been a while?
Also never had a gf... won't that make me a weirdo?
At the library because you can see what's she's looking into and bring something up about it. Man initiation can be compliments, something that's happening or just a straight up hi
My gf doesn't like to show her emotions in public places. We also don't hold each others hands when we are with even one friend. That makes me uncomfortable sometimes. She has a really impulsive character too, it's really easy for her to blow a fuse. Shit gets annoying. Since a while, doesn't feel loved and important. Any tips how to get that shit together ?
well if this "emotionally connected" one you fuck wants you to last longer and is willing to see you do some weird shit to maybe make it better, I got a good idea for you.
put some socks in the freezer, let them get cold (but not stiff, you still need to put those fuckers on) and fuck her while wearing them.
fact check this if you don't want to follow the advice of some random anon on /b/ of all godforsaken places, but something about cold feet makes you not cum as fast.
it worked for me, so idk, results may vary.
Maybe a society or something that meets in the daytime that you can fit in? Or something on the weekends where you live? just look at the options around you, see if there's any groups you're into. It's nice 'cause you don't have to rely on forced introductions and it gives you a topic. It'll seem like there's a lot of pressure if you show up on your own the first time but remember there are no real expectations of you and you can be who you describe yourself as, even if it takes a while for your personal opinion of yourself to catch up. GL.
Talk to her about it or move on. Psychiatrist might help, never gone down that route before.
Great advice for a life of one night stands and fuck buddies. Sure fire way to kill every and any true relationship before it starts. Emotional investment is what makes a relationship , well, a relationship, if you're not secure enough to take the risk that comes with it then you should stick to the single life. Having someone who you can invest your self entirely into and trust 100% is one of the best joys you can get in life.
Too bad it comes with a lot of painful learning.
That would actually be pretty funny if you played it off well.
Fuck more women, or at least fuck around more.
>offered sex by multiple girls, not really caring for it because sluts don't interest me
>get my dick sucked a few times, sexual shit doesn't really do it for me when I'm not emotionally attached to someone
>think 98% of women are pure shit
>find a girl that I get along with more than anyone, both like each other
>stupid shit happens and we don't talk for ages, we both fucked up. haven't spoken in years now
>basically giving up on women because no one challenges me with wit, humour, smarts like she did
>not oneitis because i don't want to be back with her but not wanting to be with anyone else because if it can't work out with the person that I got along with the most who can it work out with
>not depressed or anything, other aspects in life are great, literally just dislike women because they have no use other than pussy and that doesn't interest me
I lack trust in woman because I have been hurt by so many of them. I'm a 24 yr old virgin with no end in sight because i have it in my head that sex is supposed the be a very intement thing with someone who you love and loves you back. Problem is I can't trust any woman enough to be able to fall in love. I also have it in my head that any woman with more than a handful of sexual partners is a whore, which causes my standards to be incredibly to high.
I know exactly what you mean man. Friday night I met a girl at the club that was actually SUPER fun/cool and weird (in a good way). We clicked REALLY well and I ended up going home with her that night.
Was fucking her in the bathroom (her best friend and one of my best friends were also there in her 1bedroom apartment) and couldn't stay hard long enough for either one of us to cum.
I don't think it's the fapping, I think it's the porn. Definitely agree that unrealistic expectations could be a serious contributing factor.