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The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
You are currently reading a thread in /b/ - Random

Thread replies: 86
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Green text story thread
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Well /b/, I've been on here for quite some time so here it is. The tale of how my life turned from absolute shit into gold.
>Be me
>Be tall and lanky as fuck in shithole area
>Try to rap but I fucking suck
>Always get arrested for vandalizing
>One day playing basketball with friends who absolutely suck
>Literally just schooling them with godly moves that freeze them
>Confident so I try a trick shot
>Fail miserably
>Ball rolls into area of Silverback blacks
>Silverbacks shove me around and make me their bitch
>One of them literally lifts me over his head
>Go home fucked up
>Crazy/old as fuck mom somehow blame’s me
>Literally shoving finger in my face
>Tells me I have to move now because she's afraid
>Fucking pissed because my close friends and weed guy were here
>"Fuck it"

>Arrive at airport early morning
>Fucked up taxi with personalized plates rolls up
>Fucked up feelings about getting in this thing
>"Fuck it, just want to get to my new home"
>Fucked up driver just slams the gas before I can even close door
>Arrive at new home around 7:30AM
>I look like a fucking bum
>Still dressed like I'm in my old ghetto
>Hat looks like it's from a fucking Asian cartoon
>"Fuck it"
>Knock on door
>Get my head together and walk in like I own the place
>Turns out new family has some actual money even though black
>Turns out I can use this money
>Bro cousin is a manlet pussy but we get along
>Femanon cousin is typical brat and slut
>Aunt keeps to herself
>Uncle constantly gives me shit but he's chill

>Don't have job
>Don't attempt to have job
>Help out family problems to distract from no job
>Literally do whatever I want now even though no job
>Uncle has law connections
>Can get in trouble and get away with anything
>Spend all my time getting pussy
>Spend all time hanging with friends
>Just use family money and connections to live
>Realize I'm the only black guy that white people like
>Become the whitest black guy you'll ever know.

Pic Related: The throne that I sit on as the prince of Bel-Air
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Bumping until I finish my grn txt
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thanks bro, OC.
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anyone is able to figure it out after basketball.
>>663655508 Here we go

>Be me last year
>Haven’t seen my cousin in months
>We meet up at family x-mas party
>Her bf is on the phone outside talking to some girl from his job
>My cousin, we'll call her Nik was mad b/c she knew they were prob fucking
>I comforted her as I always do b/c I love my cousin
>We haven't seen eachother in almost a year and she was like "I forgot how based you can be anon"
> She hugged me and put her hand up my shirt and I noticed I had my hands up hers a little on her back
>She give's me a peck on the cheek and I gave her a quick one back on the lips
> Then she kissed me on the lips and we start making out in my grandparents room (the party was at my grandparents house)
> She was like I'm sorry we can't and I said "hold on just follow me into the bathroom for a minute"
>We started making out and I got her pants off and she started saying "no, no we can't fuck plz M stop"
>I said "Nik, I need to make you happy and were not fucking b/c I don't have a condom, btw it's legal to marry your cousin in this state"
> I sat her on the bathroom counter and ate her out
>She was moaning so bad she put the hand towel in her mouth
>She came so hard she pissed on my face aswell as in my mouth, then she cleaned me up and we went back out to the party.

No one asked a goddamn question and thought we were talking b/c they knew she was upset. Waiting for her to call me. TRUE STORY NO SHIT, I PROMISE!
>nice shitpost pasta

Get out.
saw it coming after the 4th line. try harder.
Gtfo incestuous nasty man
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"Give me stuff to repost on /r/4chan for internet-points" the thread.

Fuck you redditards. Go to hell.
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And my name is Jayden Smith, my daddy beats me, I like clouds 'n shit.
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Nope, btw that is OC, I just like telling anons. It was fun and intense, thought she was gonna tell her bf.
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Oh I have more of those I thought we were just doing OC, here ya go.
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I'm catfish man
I was the guy in that thread with the same pic
just thought it was funny my post is in a screencap
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HUMANS OF MERICA OF LIVING OF EXIGENCY OF STIMULATION OF BODY-MOVING/LIKE-SENSE SINCE OF ELECTRICITY OF CAUSED OF IN OF BODY SINCE 1. tiny metals in human 2. metals moved since of energies striked/hitting metals 3. energies sent/from machine far of miles.
put any video cameras connected of internet ta your face (whenever sheltered so of other-than/not seeing sky of so of drones of hovering/flew/floating/levitating and so human of military of United States of collecting/getting/having/possessing data-of-matter/communication-of-obviousness-of-reality so of warring)...and I am of text of since if you are panicked/terrified/terrored/fearing of coercion/harm/wrong/terrible body movement of not/other-than helpful/effective/useful/good so you live then stay/rest/relax at a one/single safe place ta time your breaths and blinks so of STIMULATION OF BODY-MOVING/LIKE-SENSE SINCE OF ELECTRICITY OF CAUSED OF IN OF BODY SINCE 1. tiny metals in human 2. metals moved since of energies striked/hitting metals 3. energies sent/from machine far of miles...of timed so of less stimulations ta live of STIMULATION OF BODY-MOVING/LIKE-SENSE SINCE OF ELECTRICITY OF CAUSED OF IN OF BODY SINCE 1. tiny metals in human 2. metals moved since of energies striked/hitting metals 3. energies sent/from machine far of miles...since planned stimulations of since you of planned of timing of body movements ta cause vital/healthy/necessary living...and since I time my breaths and blinks ta sense/sensation of touch of pulse of my heart so I am of less stressings of energies at me ta cause so I am living of other-than/not/no harm.
...and my pic is of map of embassies/equipment-and-and-or-artificed-machinations since of human of United States military of a-ction/slackening-and-tensing of muscles
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Thanks for the screencap then, that is my favorite grn txt of all time. Shit was tits.
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Here's a classic
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Oh fuck yeah! A second chance to put in my social security number
I believe you want to spread viruses
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We were all just having a good time until...
The Legend of the Spinner
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Holy shit
True /mischief/ here
More like this pls
somebody got the "I became jehovah witness for grill and then grill left but I stayed JW" one?
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This guy made a thread on /lit/ a month ago (may still be in the archive) about a selection of his favorite greentexts.

This is his collection in epub for those who don't own a kindle. I'd rec you to have a look, he is a man of taste.
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this was an absolutely terrible effort
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Someone has the story of neal ?
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Funny, that's exactly what I told your mom last night, now get back to work Brian, do your homework.
/r/ing the story of a female whom was a slut in college

>anon post story of sut GF
>b makes calculation of how many miles of cock shes taken
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>graduate high school, 2007
>go to Air Force
>get kicked out 28 days later
>live back at parents' house with step-father
>get sent to Job Corps
>leave Job Corps 10 days later
>go live with aunt two states away
>get kicked out, have to live with cousin 20 miles away
>get kicked out because he's deploying
>be back at parents' house
>months pass by
>start working at a plant that is 40 mins away by car
>get laid off about 2 months later
>mother comes back from overseas
>move up north with parents
>enlist in Army
>finish Basic Training
>get kicked out of AIT
>back at parents' new house in northern state
Which was actually on yet another Army base
>do nothing but drive around, play RuneScape and Xbox, and read comic books until the following July
>move to foreign country
>didn't like it, move to old house now occupied by aunt and uncle
>stay there doing nothing but looking for work and/or school for MONTHS...by bike
>find nothing, plan to kill self
>move back overseas with parents
>begin college overseas
>live fat for a while as a student in a foreign country
>have no friends
>be 7,000 miles away from 'home'
>truly find myself and realize who/what I am
>stop complaining and start to turn life around
>have to leave country a second time because mother's time is up
>move back to old house with parents
>look for a new school
>find one
>go to school by transferring in
>be at school since 2013
>oldest student in most classes, can't connect with most people
>slowly fade into a 'fringe friend' status with few friends made
>no one wants to talk to me for prolonged periods at a time
>find myself in my senior year, mostly browsing /b/, doing homework, interning, and wondering where my life went wrong
>opened this thread
>house party at like 8 in the fucking morning

I call bullshit.
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I was not prepared for this
Holy shit you're retarded
Holy fucking shit that hurt me deep inside
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And I've been single since 2005. So, yeah. Gotta use headphones now, since one of my roommates is up, and FUCKING BLASTING his music.

Why would a person *need* to be the center of attention in a dorm of only 4 guys, 1 of which isn't even here?
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>be finnish
>45 year old
>movement teacher
>student are 12-13
>they had tight cloth on
>today was after class
>the girl go into a shower
>can see more nudism body
>her breast grow to the fuck
>little hair look has the trim
>erect my penis
>"do you have ok"
>she look out to me in wet shoulder hair
>cover breast growth but can both nipple
>turn to go into shower
>"you don't look the shower"
>"but your body can't say yes"
>she run out to nudism
>hear she tell to the head master
>he invited me to the office of his
>"stop never again or you get a shoe"

I don't want a shoe for my money but what can stop the girl look time? I can see every day the girl when she into a shower and all had the body of good look to make resistance hard for penis

every day I have have tempetation resist. I can the future too but the head master can give me a shoe if I look more to the girl shower.
>be me when i was 17
>blonde girl with braces and pigtails is 14, my buddy's lil sister
>shes always talking about being a virgin
> we start drinking beers, she tells me she loses all self control after a single beer, I make sure she drinks two
> I take her outside to the backseat of my car,
>make out like crazy, pull off her pants and she has the most perfect pink pussy I have ever seen. Tits are a bit small but perfect pink nipples
>fumble to get condom on diamond dick, she is nodding off "drunk" off two beers
>shove it in and absolutely cannot hold back the flood
>cum on the third pump
>fake that I have a cramp and stop, make shit up like now isn't a good time
>she asks me if she is still a virgin
Do you even reading comprehension bro?
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who plays basketball after seeing their dad die on 9/11?
pathetic fuckers and your copy pastas
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too bad it's fake
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Shit, son. I've had a girlfriend for the past two years and have kept up relationships all my life. And I'm nothing impressive. I hope you get shit together, mate. You've made it this far.
Pathetic fucker that cant see b8
are you 12 or something?

That story was predictable from the 5th line.
Wow! I just downloaded it and it's legit!
Come on guys, some prime fap material awaits you, no viruses here !!
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Yeah, I'm trying. This year's started out pretty shitty though, with me having been rejected for the JET program right before the semester even started.

>feel like MF Doom most of the time, because I wear a mask to the rest of the world
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Sry m8 I thought you were talking about mine, I made the cousin one, that is OC, I knew the first guy was Fresh Prince by the third line, that was stupid, my bad. I'll kill myself senpai.
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Best time favourite
Could definitely use this on the roommates.
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Holy fuck it's too early for these feels.
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I forgot what this one was but too lazy to check
Holy shit I was there!
Are you a nigger? Because this shit is what Evey image niggers tweet looks like
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I got you fam
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jeeze senpai I found a less blurry one just for you >>663663849
Thread replies: 86
Thread images: 55
Thread DB ID: 421677

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