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>>597383534 So I got a blood test back today. I haven't had sex for like 2-3 years. Apparently I'm without symptoms but tested positive for Herpes. So that means 1 of the 3 girls I've slept with had herpes. 1 of them was also tested in the past and they didnt have herpes and that cleared 1 of the other girls I had sex with so they are either clean or they lied to me and they gave their new boyfriend herpes too. Or the other girl I slept with had herpes but she wasn't supposed to have it because she was pregnant and would have got screened too. Then she had another kid after she had sex with me which means she had him while infected with herpes and knowingly transmitted it to me. I dont understand.
>>597384132 >let me tell you all about my favorite gun and ammo I used to kill my dog Goddamit, gunfags just can't help themselves can they? Their obsession has to permeate every aspect of their life and be communicated in any opportunity whatsoever.
Not to sound like an edgy cunt, but I've never really gotten close to anyone in life; I've spent most of it emotionally pushing everyone away, thinking I'd probably just be better of on my own. But recently, due to a series of bad life decisions, it's gotten to the point where I actually want to be around people and talk things out with them; even just being around others is a good enough distraction.
Anyway, I recently saw part of a conversation my two flatmates had (the two people I was sort of relying on, they actually seemed to like and care about me), and as it turns out, they've just spent the last few days shit talking me. Worst of all, they thought I was " Annoying and uncomfortably clingy". That line got me more than I thought it would. The gist of the conversation seemed to be that they don't really want to be around me anymore.
I mean, sure I was kind of being an asshole, but it was clear I had a problem. I thought there would be some leeway, at least. But I guess not.
At least I proved myself right; I'm probably better on my own.
Sorry for the long post, I just wanted to vent. Thanks for listening...or reading, or whatever.
>>597389974 Don't be a faggot about it, be proud you can take this much and keep going. That's what I do when people don't care about me, don't care about how I'm doing, don't care about the one that has helped them get better lives. I'm fucking proud people can be such assholes to me and I keep standing. So stop trying to run like a wimp, be a man.
Every goddamn day I see posts on Facebook from particular girls (and sometimes guys but mostly girls) about how beautiful and simple life is, and about how you should always love yourself, and everything is perfect, and blah blah blah. The common themes I notice amongst all of them: they're all fucking gorgeous, they all come from well-to-do families, and they've all been surrounded by positivity and popularity their whole lives.
Can these people truly not see why it's more difficult for the ostracized to handle something like rejection? Or failure? Or yet another affirmation that you are, in fact, worthless like everyone said?
It drives me INSANE when people credit the support and good fortune they've had their entire lives to their optimism. They are optimistic because of what they have, not the other way around.
Guys..please watch this..he speak in japanese but there's english subtitles. It talk about the forest in Japan named Aokigahara,wich is famous because is meta for the people that decide to end with their lives..But they do it in here,leaving objects and last words letters...I've watched it 2 times already,and everytime..make me so sad..that i really want to go there,and feel everything that those people have go trough...Please,if you have 20 minute's to spare,even after the thread get 404'd,please watch the full video,it's really worth it.
>>597390727 God damn it.... I'm now walking away grime brigade staff duty. I'm going to cry. I no shit had an incredibly similar experience.... A little girl throwing us a peace sign. Kohgiani Afghanistan. My 240 was the end of that. I now feel like dying. There WAS a bad dude behind her fuck.....
>>597394827 So you can be happy, you can try to see the good. If you see bad... Get he fuck out there and change it. If it becomes good, congratulations, you see it. Lot of people don't get to see the fire around them until they step in it. Censorship, a world out to get them, conspiracies, a hidden world of happiness.
People who don't see bad will be the happiest motherfuckers, for they don't realize they're dying outside.
So if you see bad and you're like me. Thank you. Thank you for staying, and helping out. Peace
>>597383534 what's wrong with me /b/? I know I was diagnosed with psychotic depression and social anxiety, but still, what the fuck is wrong with me? Why is it that when someone says "hi" or trys to initiate a conversation with me, I still am able to conjure up an awkward silence that eventually leads to said person walking away thinking I'm just another "too good for you fucker" type of guy. I feel like I am doing this to myself, but I don't know how to stop doing it. wat do /b/? Am I damned to a lonely fate /b/?
>>597394827 Well, that's a long story. I was never liked as a kid. I was bullied every day that I went to school, elementary, junior high, and high school. I was a different breed than the rest of any of my classmates growing up. None of them had known anyone who didn't have money. But throughout all of this, I stayed positive and kind. People started to confide in me and liked the fact that i was a decent human being (this is around 17-present).
Yes, I did have some friends growing up, but they accepted me right away when we were fuckin toddlers.
After schooling and whatever, I realized that people were more drawn to the open-minded, easy to talk to, kind person. In a sense I adapted to it, but I was already naturally like that.
Thinking back now, I had a lot of spirit as a kid and it is dwindling as time passes. However, I will always stay an optimist.
To start seeing the good in things is to basically change your brains entire way of thinking, which will never happen, if you don't already think that way. You can transition though. The saying "the grass is always greener on the other side" is a very true statement to everything pertaining to the shit in this world, or even your own. Basically, I'm saying that you just have to open your eyes to the good. It's there, you just have to look.
>>597388247 Feeling this. I've been dating this girl for three months. She tells me she loves me all the time, feel as though I could spend my life with this girl. I've been hurt before but she seems different. Yesterday I'm on her laptop looking for a picture I copy pasted from the web to repost in a thread on here, and I open one of her folders. It's full of pictures of her and her ex, on vacations, in really nice hotel rooms, making out, ect.. Stung so bad seeing these pictures. She looked so happy, and I can't get his smug fucking face out of my mind. I can't afford to even take her out to a decent dinner right now, let alone the things he was treating her to. She swears she loves me, and absolutely despises him and never even knew those pictures were there. I don't trust her, I can't. I feel so many levels of awful right now.
>>597394985 I know that feel, /b/ro. Firefight in safaar basaar, southern Helmand Province. Asshole started shooting at my buddy who has a wife and 3 kids. Fuck that, I shot him so Corey could go home to his family. Found out later it was a 14 year old kid. Haven't slept since.
>>597395989 You can try to see all bad that's in you. You can try to change that. You'll end up more depressed and fuck yourself over the sad truth of all human beings.
Loneliness on the other hand... It takes a strong mofo to accept it. You don't need anyone. If others need you, they'll want you. You're important, and you're powerful. You accomplish shit on your own. Now if you don't, no worries. You're still here in this world, and if you choose to, you can change that.
>>597395858 idk what this anon was trying to get across, but you need to see the bad and the good of things. I'm a strong believer in karma and if you have too much negativity, it will attract to you. Same goes for positive feelings
I understand what you're saying, but what I'm asking is how do you break the cycle of negativity? When all your life that's all you've known, how do you stop it? I am genuinely curious as to wtf people expect me to do when they say "oh just be positive." About what, exactly?
>>597396780 I really needed that man thanks You have no idea I'm even going to counseling I just needed to get it out. If I say it in counseling it could get reported, and be considered a crime.... First time I have ever said anything about it.
>>597398322 >>597396378 This was my earlier response. It's not too negative, but enough to change people's point of view. It's a mindset that you have to discover for yourself. I would never tell me to "just be positive." If you don't know how to be, then you won't be. My only suggestion would be looking at different scenarios, and tell yourself what you actually see in those scenarios. Make note of the bad and good and expand on how the good can become even better. It's simple and easier to train your brain
>>597385279 I kind of know this feel. I'm usually desparately trying to make the people around me laugh or at least smile. It's kinda like I try to catch some second hand happiness when they laugh. For the last 7 years or so I've gone to sleep every night hoping that I don't wake up.
>>597399034 You aren't alone, man. We have all these fags telling us we kill for oil, serve corportations, whatever. We weren't responsible for the situation we were put in. No matter what happened, we got out of there alive. It sucks, and its hard to deal with, but what it boils down to is it was us or them unfortunately. We came home, we got the second chance. Now it's up to us to make the most of it. Your best start to getting through is by telling it, and I hope it feels like a huge weight is off your shoulders now. You're not alone, /b/ro. If it ever feels like you are, just remember me. I know the feel, and I'm glad you're home.
>Always tie up the dog but my mom always feels bad to see him like that and she lets him off >People always saying they're gonna shoot the poor little guy if he ever comes in their yard again >AGAIN, TIE. UP. THE DOG. LEAVE HIM TIED UP >See my mom today. >Get in the car >Say's she has some news >ok >While i wasn't home, the dog has been missing for some days now >She finds him with the help of some neighbors >Pick him up >She says that he was puking blood and or bleeding from his nose or something >Guy said that they found him in the gravel pit >Nothing is broken >Can't been hit because nothing is broken >Someone shot him in the eye with a fucking pellet gun >Guy claims he found him in the gravel pit >Someone shot my dog in the eye >Probably kicked his ass too. He has cuts and scratches on his face >In no position to give anyone shit because in a way i feel that its my fault even though im not around to chain him up >Want to find the person who did this and break their fucking legs >Sit back >relax >sigh
I mean he's still alive. But he might die.. From a little fucking pellet (poisonous on top of that). So.. Im gonna try to dig it out if its possible. But its gonna fuckin suck if he dies.
i always have been alone. ever since i was young i got bullied and if i did anything back i got scolded by the teacher. i was mostly alone at home. with my mom being the only family i had. but she was always too busy with her job. i knew she did it so she could afford food and clothes for me and i loved her at that. but when she got home she started drinking and often hit me. growing up i made some friends but lost them when i fell in depression. then this amazing girl came into my life and we started dating. she told me she would always be at my side. i felt so lucky.. the years that followed seemed perfect thanks to her. but suddenly she is gone. i get a text message that she has alot of things on her mind and needs some time alone. i tell her that i understand it. hurts like hell, but i manage to stay strong for her. a month passes by and i find out she already has a new lover. she tells me that she no longer has any feelings for me. feeling rather betrayed i convince my self that i don't need her and i start dating this other girl. but i could not get the first ex out of my head. the new girl tells me im clearly not over my ex and that she does not want a relationship with me while i think of someone else. 4 years later my heart still aches. i made new friends. and went into new relationships but i still feel so alone with out her. this will be just another lonely valentines day.
Thank you /b/. I know this place is not what it's used to be but once in a while i see some threads filled with strangers that care. Reading through them makes me feel like i'm not alone, like there are people damaged by life, but still live. it makes me sad and happy at the same time. it's sad how cruel this world can be and how it probably never get any better. But on the other hand i'm happy. i'm not alone and theres a place where people actually care about each other. we do our jokes, we show our ugliest faces and our cruelty. but we care. It makes me happy because there are others who still continue. who dont give up. and that helps. alot.
>>597402221 Don't m7. Trust me. Just because you don't make as much money as the other guy means nothing. Things like vacation or gifts are all about being thought out, not expensive. They're supposed to be special, not lavish. So don't let her go. And ask politely, why she has the folder, if you're so butthurt m9. Dw. Don't loose her.
>>597402221 Bitch-slap her. Alternatively, delete the folder, clear recycling bin, and overwrite the photo locations so that no file resurrecters can bring them back. Then go to therapy on the DL to get the other guy's face out of your mind, and to tell yourself that she's not lying. If she asks where the photos are, DO. NOT. CRACK.
>>597398234 Have a talk with her first, tell her you need this from her to believe her. If you notice in any way she's no being real to you, let her go and find someone who is. Trust me, there's always someone better. I've had an ex that felt like the world to me, we went to musea together, went to beaches together, fooled around everywhere, until she cheated on me. Turns out she's fucked 30 other guys since I broke up with her, she has a new boyfriend and she cheated on him in a week. I trusted the fuck out of her and this is what she did. Now I'm dating a girl I could actually marry, and when I look back at my ex, I think I should have seen it coming. Which made me look at my current guy with other eyes, and I still see the sweet girl that actually loves me. You'll know.
>>597402355 believe me, i wanted to. but when i looked in her eyes i realized i just wanted her to be happy. and as much as i hated it, i knew i was no longer the guy that made her happy. letting her go was probably the best thing i could do for her. she threw me away like trash and stopped caring about me a long time ago. she threw me away like garbage yet i keep on loving her
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