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>Dating a woman
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You are currently reading a thread in /b/ - Random

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>Dating a woman

Fucking WHY?

>Dolphins are capable of manipulating their vaginal muscles in order to provide maximum pleasure. Most women cannot
>Dolphins secrete a substance that dramatically shortens your refractory period as long as your dick remains in her vagina. Women cannot
>Dolphins cannot cheat on you as they do not form lasting, intimate relationships. Women can, and not only can, but they enjoy doing it
>Dolphins do not mind if you fuck another dolphin. A women will hate you if you fuck another women
>Dolphins don’t mind if you cum inside either. She won’t force you to pay child support for 18 years like a women. She can’t even get pregnant
>Dolphins won’t leave you for another dolphin with more shekels. Dolphins do not have a system of currency and are not consumer whores like women
>If you are the submissive type, dolphins can be aggressive, and far more convincingly aggressive, not like a 140 pound bitch who won’t scare anyone
>Dolphins do not expect you to spend exorbitant amounts of shekels on them
>Dolphins give it up easily
>Dolphins do not demand superior rights to men
>Dolphins do not organize Dolphinwalks
>You can ride a dolphin through the ocean
>Dolphins are more intelligent then women

Dolphins are clearly superior to any human woman of any race.

So why haven't you fucked a dolphin yet, /b/?
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>>591794555
fuck your pasta faggot, fuck the sea
>>
>2015
>not fucking dolphins
>>
Cant turn women into dolphin steaks
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why haven't you OP
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>>591794555
I'm not even slightly attracted to dolphins.
>>
Because they are so Fukien hard to get.
Captcha: Dubli
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can i enjoy sex with a dolphin in the missionary position for the porpoises of procreation?
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>>591795140
You can turn them into woman steaks tho
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i seriously wish i was a dolphin
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>>591794555
have you?
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>>591794555
You posted this shit yesterday you attention faggot
>>
>>591794555
I live in Arizona. Only Gila monsters here and that shit is loose
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But OP.. Where would you fuck a dolphin? And I'm pretty sure a dolphin would not let a human fuck it.
>>
A man can dream. I've always wanted to try a moist bag like that but I don't have a chance
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>>591795434
Do women provide clean burning lamp fuel tho?
>>
>>591795393

Ha.

I like you.
>>
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>>591794555
>yfw you live hundreds of miles away from any ocean
>>
nuce dolphin vagina
>>
A dolphin can't suck you off. Not very well anyway
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>>591794555
>Dolphins can breathe underwater, women can't. >neither can you
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>>591796023
You actually have to get really friendly with one playing and such then (if they don't freak out) you try rubbing and fingering before you know they've consented. Its allot of work
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>>591796657
>dolphins
>breathe underwater
u wot m8?
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>>591796657
dolphins cant too faggot
>>
I don't fuck food
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>>591794555
>>
>>591796865
At least they can last longer underwater than any of you faggots
>>
>>591796023
By putting your dick inside it?

It would and sometimes it even asks for it

http://www.beyond-the-pale.co.uk/zoophilia.htm
>>
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Dolphins are clearly superior to human women
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>wanting your dick pulled off by a dolphin harpy

Dolphins are also notorious rapists.
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>>591796733
But where the hell are you going to find a dolphin to fuck. It's going to swim away before you get the chance to fuck it. And whos going to pay all that money to go find a dolphin just to have it swim off before you get laid
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A dolphin can't get me a drink or make me a sandwich after I fuck it.
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>>591797014
>mfw i am a dolphin
>>
Can dolphins also give you a blowjob?
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>>591797552
They can give you a blowhole
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>>591797463
>>
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>>591797049
I read the mating portion and apparently the dude has mated with dolphins on many occasions??

I also don't understand the part where you would find a dolphin. He said it can take up to 3 days but like why the fuck would the dolphin return to the same spot and time to meet you like it probably sees many humans if its by the shore.

>Mfw this is bullshit
>>
because i am niggerkin with a gorilla headmate
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>>591797397
Well it might if it had hands but the sandwich would be soggy and the drink watered down.
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I don't want to be gangraped after they drown me.
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>>591797328
believe it or not dolphin can be friendly towards humans

jeez /b/

>>591798066
>why the fuck would the dolphin return to the same spot and time to meet you
why not? It doesn't have to be at the exact same time.
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>>591794555
I sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of soaring over the oilfields dropping hot sticky loads on disgusting foreigners. People say to me that a person being a helicopter is Impossible and I'm fucking retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a plastic surgeon install rotary blades, 30 mm cannons and AMG-114 Hellfire missiles on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me "Apache" and respect my right to kill from above and kill needlessly. If you can't accept me you're a heliphobe and need to check your vehicle privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.
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>>591799191
Yeah but like you'd have to sit around the beach for hours on end just to meet the dolphin again like fuck that for all that I can buy a prostitute. And how would you even know if it was the same dolphin? And if dolphins visit the area frequently enough, people would more than likely be there.

This is bullshit m8
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>>591799538
ok ok you probably know everything too uh?
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>>591799679
It's not that I know everything, it's that I'm not a complete sped whos retarded enough to believe into this shit. I am asking valid questions because I want to determine whether people are actually fucking dolphins and if it's an actual feasible thing.

Saying I know everything just cause I can come up with arguments that I want answered just means you don't know about it either. And if no one can answer these questions, it makes me believe this is bullshit.
>>
>>591797397
>dolphin can't get me a drink or make me a sandwich after I fuck it.

So, what we have here
sandwich+drink after fuck> fuck up your whole life
Looks reasonable to me indeed
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Because I am gay and prefer being bred by boars

>that glorious half hour long orgasm
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>>591794555
Because I haven't had the chance to
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Damn. I was actually interested in this, but it appears no one can give me the answers I seek. Guess this was bullshit afterall..
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>>591796636
blowhole m8

dolfins already use the blowhole recreationaly
Thread replies: 51
Thread images: 17
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