>Dating a woman Fucking WHY? >Dolphins are capable of

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ARF ARF
YEAH, YEAH, YEAH (GRRRR)
UH, YEAH DON'T GET IT TWISTED
THIS RAP SHIT, IS MINE
MOTHERFUCKER, IT'S NOT, A FUCKING, GAME
FUCK WHAT YOU HEARD
IT'S WHAT YOU HEARIN
IT'S WHAT YOU HEARIN (LISTEN)
IT'S WHAT YOU HEARIN (LISTEN)
IT'S WHAT YOU HEARIN (LISTEN)

X GON GIVE IT TO YA
FUCK WAIT FOR YOU TO GET IT ON YOUR OWN
X GON DELIVER TO YA
KNOCK KNOCK, OPEN UP THE DOOR, IT'S REAL
WIT THE NON-STOP, POP POP AND STAINLESS STEEL
GO HARD GETTIN BUSY WIT IT
BUT I GOT SUCH A GOOD HEART
I'LL MAKE A MOTHERFUCKER WONDER IF HE DID IT
DAMN RIGHT AND I'LL DO IT AGAIN
CUZ I AM RIGHT SO I GOTS TO WIN
BREAK BREAD WIT THE ENEMY
BUT NO MATTER HOW MANY CATS I BREAK BREAD WIT
I'LL BREAK WHO YOU SENDIN ME
YOU MOTHERFUCKER NEVER WANTED NOTHIN
BUT YOUR LIFE SAID, THAT'S FOR THE LIGHT DAY
I'M GETTIN DOWN, DOWN
MAKE IT SAY FREEZE
BUT WON'T BE THE ONE ENDIN UP ON HIS KNEES (WHOO)
PLEASE, IF THE ONLY THING YOU CATS DID IS COME OUT TO PLAY
STAY OUT MY WAY, MOTHERFUCKER

FIRST WE GONNA ROCK, THEN WE GONNA ROLL
THEN WE LET IT POP, DON'T LET IT GO
X GON GIVE IT TO YA
HE GON GIVE IT TO YA
X GON GIVE IT TO YA
HE GON GIVE IT TO YA

>/int/

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>>591457988
I fucking love you man, I've always wanted to do this.

Tips on hiding from coast guard?

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Look at it glisten in the water

>>591457988
If i wanted to fuck a dolphin, how could I go about doing it without getting arrested/swimming in the ocean?

>>591457988
>/int/?
wat
>So why haven't you fucked a dolphin yet
I don't have access to one, never considered it, and don't find them attractive

what's wrong with you

>>591458628
id hit

>>591457988
>>You can ride a dolphin through the ocean
thats it, i need a dolphin

there's a running joke about me masturbating to dolphin porn

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AIN'T NEVER GAVE NOTHIN TO ME
BUT EVERYTIME I TURN AROUND
CATS GOT THEY HANDS OUT WANTIN SOMETHING FROM ME
I AIN'T GOT IT SO YOU CAN'T GET IT
LETS LEAVE IT AT THAT CUZ I AIN'T WIT IT
HIT IT WIT FULL STRENGTH
I'M A JAIL NIGGA
SO I FACE THE WORLD LIKE IT'S EARL IN THE BULLPEN
YOU AGAINST ME, ME AGAINST YOU
WHATEVER, WHENEVER
WHAT THE FUCK YOU GON DO?
I'M A WOLF IN SHEEP CLOTHING
ONLY NIGGA THAT YOU KNOW THAT CAN CHILL
COME BACK AND GET THE STREETS OPEN
I'VE BEEN DOING THIS FOR NINETEEN YEARS
NIGGAS WANNA FIGHT ME? FIGHT THESE TEARS
I PUT IN WORK AND IT'S ALL FOR THE KIDS
BUT THESE CATS DONE FORGOT WHAT WORK IS (UH-HUH!)
THEY DON'T KNOW WHO WE BE
LOOKIN! BUT THEY DON'T KNOW WHO THEY SEE, NIGGA

[CHORUS: DMX]
FIRST WE GONNA ROCK, THEN WE GONNA ROLL
THEN WE LET IT POP, GO LET IT GO
X GON GIVE IT TO YA
HE GON GIVE IT TO YA
X GON GIVE IT TO YA
HE GON GIVE IT TO YA

AIIYO WHERE MY NIGGAZ AT?!
I KNOW I GOT THEM DOWN IN THE GAME
GIVE EM LOVE AND THEY GIVE IT BACK
TALK TOO MUCH FOR TOO LONG
DON'T GIVE UP YOU'RE TO STRONG (WHAT?!)
A DOG TO BOW BOW HUG IT
SHOUTOUT TO NIGGAZ THAT DONE IT
AND IT AIN'T EVEN ABOUT THE DOUGH
IT'S ABOUT GETTIN DOWN FOR WHAT YOU STAND FOR YO (FOR REAL)

FIRST WE GONNA ROCK, THEN WE GONNA ROLL
THEN WE LET IT POP, GO LET IT GO
X GON GIVE IT TO YA
HE GON GIVE IT TO YA
X GON GIVE IT TO YA
HE GON GIVE IT TO YA

>>591458657
Psh, don't ask me.

I'm still trying to find a secluded place where wild dolphins are chillin at

>>591458833
What's wrong with me?

What's wrong with you, anon, why haven't you embraced the glory of dolphin vagina?

Y'know, that pussy actually looks pretty delicious.

>>591459103
>He doesn't masturbate to dolphin porn
Get a load of this faggot.

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Welp, this thread officially derailed.

>>591459483
Embrace it anon

My pp is confused

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>>591457988
I'd love to fuck a dolphin, OP, but where am I gonna find one? I can't just walk around the corner and get a dolphin hooker

won't the male dolphins beat you up for chasing their women
I tried something similar to this in Brooklyn and it did not end well

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>>591457988

You got some good points here OP. I really don't see any flaw in your logic. Plus you can ride the fuckin dolphin through the ocean and shit and get a blowhole job afterwards. Then you can have little dolphin/human hybrid babies and teach em how to speak english then monetize on the situation and sell em to a circus or someshit. Then your dolphin wife will hate you and start fuckin other humans out of spite so you'll start to resent her slowly until one day you snap and hire a killer whale to assassinate your dolphin mistress in her sleep.

>>591457988
I wonder if it smells like fish

If I fucked a dolphin everyone would laugh...
Cuz I'd end up with the ugliest one

>>591459570
the joke stems from the truth

>>591457988
I heard their vaginal muscles are strong enough to rip your dick off. Don't do it OP

is there any video anywhere of someone fucking a dolphin?

>>591460504
>killer whale
ha

Guise where can I find a dolphin to fug?

>>591460593
probably smells like chicken

>>591460602

Everyone gets a beautiful dolphin waifu and you end up getting a manatee. Such is life

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Using human females for sexual pleasure, plebs

>>591460801
No, sadly not

>>591460033
plis halp us spoder mon

this is my fetish

>>591457988
"Shekels" I kek'd

>>591457988
>Dolphins do not organize Dolphinwalks
It's hard to walk without legs.

Just imagine her thrusting wildly on your donger while contracting her cunt rythmically

where's the gif of the guy fcking the dolphin

>>591461089

There are if you know which beast sites to check. Hint, they aren't on any streaming ones. You'll have to start diggin in forums

>>591460757
>this is what people believe
If it was that powerful it would be ripping male dolphin dicks off too, you're just upset because you know you can't get the dolphin pootang you so want

>>591460593
dolphins are fishes: they swim & they have fins

>surf a fair bit
>see dolphins regularly
>see sharks regularly
>see weird shit all the time (full size trees floating in the ocean, a whale parked itself at my local one day and was just lying on it's back splashing the water with it's flipper, saw a red belly black snake 'swim' past one day, bull rays, you name it)
>surfing one day with bro
>pod of dolphins cruise past
>hang around for a bit
>dolphin slides onto front of board (I was riding a longboard)
>hangs there for about 10 seconds on its side just looking at me
>makes one of those squeeky noises, slides off and swims away

shit was weird yo

>>591460474
one of their best episodes

>>591460385
Hawt as fuck

>>591461738
It wanted you. Thats a form of dolphin flirting. No shit

>>591461738
Where was this?

>>591461941
man why don't women ever do this shit

>>591461995
east coast aus

>>591461738
You missed a great opportunity

>>591462065

They do, you have to leave your moms basement first

>>591461738
she wanted your flipper

>>591461668
they breath air and have lungs. fish have gills. dolphins are mammals, dumbass

>>591462262
;_;

>>591457988
>a women
>another women

>>591462217
How popular is the beach? Are there times when its rather deserted?

I think you know where im goin with this

>>591460385
Go to seaworld

what about dolphin cock

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>>591461668
>dolphins are fishes
>are fishes
>fishes
Are you kidding me, how can you be this retarded. Dolphins are mammals like whales, they are not a fucking shark are they. You can easily tell by how they swim, if they swim by flapping up and down rather than side to side then they are not a fish. They also breathe air, not water, sharks have gills which is why they are fish.

this is the only decent thread ive seen on 4chin in weeks

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>>591457988
>She won’t force you to pay child support for 18 years like a women.

Don't be having children if you don't want to support them. It's that simple nigger.

>>591457988
What in all seven layers of the unholiest of HELLS did I just read?

And, more interestingly...why the fuck do I have a boner which is raging with the force of ten thousand suns?

>>591461668
No dolphins are mammals.

>>591462709
>Inb4 whales are fish

>>591462501
It's popular in summer and deserted in winter
near Newcastle

I think I do too

>>591462501
Maybe you can try to pay your nearest aqualand for a little private moment with one of their dolphins

>>591462677
dude they can fucking kill you with them

they are 2 feet long and can ejaculate up to 14 feet away

>>591462709
psst... don't feed the trolls.... you fucking retarded newfag

>>591462775
there was a great one about getting double digits for their post number last night. this post would fit right in.

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>>591457988

>>591463025
just thought it was kinda gettin to be a clambake in here

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>>591457988
WHY AREN'T YOU FUCKING A BIRD ANON?

>Dolphins are more intelligent than women

Top kek

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>>591463337
>trolls
>newfag
I don't think he was trolling, he was just being autistic and retarded so I corrected him.

>inb4 I took your bait
>implying I care, it was 2/10

The female dolphin can be either masturbated or fucked, depending on your gender.

Obviously, being human, it is awkward, but not impossible to mate in open water. It is easier to have the dolphin in a shallow area (like the shallows just off the beach) around 1 1/2 to 2 feet deep. This is usually comfortable enough for both the dolphin and you. Gently, you should roll the dolphin on her side, so she is lying belly-towards you. You can prop yourself up on an elbow, and lie belly to belly against her. You may want to use the other arm to gently hold her close, and place the tip of your member against her genital slit. She will, if interested, arch her body up against you, taking you inside her body. There is usually a fair bit of wriggling and shifting, usually to get comfortable, both outside and inside.

Once comfortable, though, females initiate a series of muscular vaginal contractions that rub the entire length of your member. They may also thrust rhythmically against you, so enjoy the experience while you can, since you will rarely last longer that a minute or two. Just prior to her climaxing, she will up the speed of her contractions and thrusts.

One thing to note. Always spend time with them afterwards. Cuddle them, rub them, talk to them and most importantly, show them you love them. This is essential, as it helps to strengthen the bond between you.

>>591463025
also they are prehensile, don't do it m8

>>591463962
>cloaca. like having vaginal and anal sex at the same time
lost my shit

>>591459246
Neat song. Did you write it?

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>>591457988
>dolphins can't get pregnant

>>591463798
And just where did you find a dolphin legally?

>>591463798
>>591464267

What the fuck am I reading?

The US military uses weaponed dolphins essentially as suicide bombers and shit.. That's animal abuse.. But this shit is fucking animal sexual abuse. What the fuck is wrong with you. Leave the dolphins alone.

>>591463298
Holy fuck I wonder what feels like.

>>591464128
Jeez man... you are the autist here.

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>>591463962
Didn't you know? OP puts a cock into his ass every night.

>>591464702
dolphins rape people too

Thanks a fucking lot, OP. Now I'm sitting here thinking about dolphin pussy.

>>591464702
Its not rape if she likes it

>>591457988
someone has hurt you.

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>>591457988
Well, fuck it, I'm getting myself a motherfucking dolphin.

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>>591458790
>>591458657
>>591458628
>>591457988

I hope one of you idiots try to fuck a wild dolphin. They will find your corpse.

I haven't seen this thread in nearly a year, oh how I love it <333

>>591464702
Dolphins are very powerful animals. If there was any rape to be had, it would be them who initiates it. There's a moral issue to be brought up here, sure, but abuse isn't it.

>>591465269
fuck morals, DOLPHIN SEX FOR EVERYONE!

>>591457988
just. fucking. weird.

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>>591461668
Dumb troll, their mammals

>>591464702
Dolphins partake in sex for fun and pleasure not just because of instinct

They are intelligent, sapient creatures with full capability to consent, and they often do.

>>591464702
>implying they don't want to fuck you
>implying they are in any sort of distress while having sex
>implying both parties don't enjoy it
>implying even if they didn't enjoy it they can't just leave at any time
>implying they don't use more of their brain than humans do
>implying they can't feel emotions like humans
>implying they don't want to be your friend

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>>591465079

I'm allergic to fish. Me and a dolphin will never make sweet love :(

>>591457988
>You can ride dolphins through the ocean
thats the one that got me

>>591464267
I HAVE THE GREATEST BONER RIGHT NOW

>>591465538
Whose mammals?

>>591464267
that actually sounds so loving and i want to fuck a female dolphin

Cool. I must be dating a dolphin.

>>591465414
Oh, but I approve.

The logistics of proper dolphin-human mating is very prohibitive, though.

>>591461995
I feel like bro is gonna say like australia or some shit.

>>591465597
>implying dolphins are allergic

Dude they are mammals not allergic

>>591465597
how come your dick smells like fish then?

I have a dream, that someday i can have my own Dolphin waifu

>>591457988
>shekels
kek

>>591457988
Is there any good dolphin porn I can fap to?

>>591457988
nope

...so no dicks then?

>>591463298
the thing that gets me, someone else was holding the camera in almost every picture and in this gif.

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> /int/

>>591465961
that's because i don't wash it you stupid nigger

>>591463417

Nah the one about the dudes dog getting his dick stuck in the dead racoon was the best.

>>591465733
They"re

Sex between a man and a dolphin is one of the universes greatest treasures

Two species have become advanced enough to act beyond instinct and instead act in pursuit of pure lust.

I find it absolutely fascinating.

>>591466198
There's very little to be found. There's the odd torrent, but they're all low-res vids and don't really show much more than someone's hand touching the dolphin's sexy bits.

>>591466338
no fuck off

>>591462795
>be me
>ave girlfriend
>date for 3 weeks
>she is a loose whore
>dump her shortly after fucking her
>she claims to be on birth control
>use condom anyway
>a week after I break it off she sends me a text message and says that she is pregnant
>over a fucking text message
>call her and tell her that it can't be mine
>go to court
>she doesn't want to agree to a maternity test, but wants child support when the baby is born
>maternity test anyway
>kid's not mine
>tell her to fuck off and good luck raising a nigger baby
>calls me a racist
>kid was actually white
>still not mine
Tl;Dr bitches will lie and deceive for a free meal

>>591466198

>>591460504
Lel

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>>591466198
There's a book called "Wet Goddess" that was written by a guy in the 70's about his experience of falling in love with and fucking a female dolphin. Used to be hard to come by, but it got re-printed and you can get it on Amazon.

I wont to bond with and make sweet sweet love to a female dolphin

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>>591463859

>>591458792
get a job at seaworld, if what op says is true, all the divers are probably fucking the dolphins there already. Or, wait 50 years and you'lll probably be able to get an interspecies relationship.

>>591461668
/b/ro, do you even taxonomy?

>>591466739
why not both?

>>591466841
No they have zero tolerance for cetacean fuckery.

You could probably pay them off with enough dosh but the wild experience seems easier and less pricey

>>591464651
dat pic

>>591466658
what do you have against powerful prehensile penis

>>591459103
link?

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2015, not fucking dragons, plebs

>>591466739
Both
At the same time
With 2 of my 50 horse dicks that lay as an image of a dress...

Does dolphin pussy smell like fish?

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>>591466841
>get a job at seaworld
>Why must you speak through guys like him? Why is it never me?

>>591462262
Rakt!

>being this beta

>>591467296
like the sea

>tfw verizon and google know all about my quest to fuck a dolphin

>dolphin and man sex
>fuck dolphin how to
>dolphin pussy
>dolphin sex ethicality
>dolphin locations in US
>habitat range of bottlenose

>>591457988
haha u sir a genius

>>591467156
I'll bet you anything that the "dolphin porn" that exists was not made in the U.S., but in a 3rd world Latin American country like Mexico.

>>591467236
Dragons aren't real you literal fucking autist.

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>>591467159
Funny thing is, I posted it by accident. Wanted to post this one.

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>>591467236
Everyone knows dragons are extinct, asshole.

>>591467509
Yeah fgt like dolphins r real

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>>591467693

>>591467579
>not even mad tho

>>591467236
dragons are nice but dolphins actually exist

>>591466630
Since TPB is down, is it possible for you to link the torrent?

>>591466946
>>591465538
>>591462855
>>591462709
>>591462346
>biting bait this hard

>>591467596
Btw, is there any rule 34 of Dany fucking here Dragons

>>591463003
Eye for an eye, whirly dick faggots

The farthest my fetishes go are stockings and knee high socks, I'm pretty tame.

So why do I now want to fuck a dolphin?

>>591467868
Its just logical anon

Someday I will attain the cetacean pussy and I will film it and post it for you all

This I swear, I truly swear I will fuck a dolphin someday

>>591467477
>Verizon
>Tfw the NSA now knows your quest too

Music I'd listen to when fucking a dolphin:
http://youtu.be/e4XCk2HFdNc

>>591466361
The other dolphin of course

well, this was an interesting thread

>>591468165
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=32S2oJuANxo
step up

>>591468165
I wouldnt listen to anything

The wet sound of her body thrusting against mine would be all the music I need

>>591466739
Since dirty nigger pussy is pretty much as nasty as you can get I guess I go with dolphin. The dolphin pussy looks cleaner

>>591457988
>Dolphins do not mind if you fuck another dolphin. A women will hate you if you fuck another women

Shame you know so little about Dolphins, they choose one mate for life and if the other dies it stops having sexual ties altogether and can become depressed.

>>591467509
Taking the bait this hard.

>>591467868
idk, maybe you're finally growing up

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>>591457988
>Dolphins do not mind if you fuck another dolphin. A women will hate you if you fuck another women
>Dolphins cannot cheat on you as they do not form lasting, intimate relationships. Women can, and not only can, but they enjoy doing it
You sir, are a faggot.

>>591468559
the sound of children on the beach screaming in terror would be all the music i need

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>>591457988
shit man is this for real

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>>591468700

Thank you /b/ for another weird fetish in my fetish collection.

>>591468700
Huh

They're less slutty than the average woman

>>591468677
This

>>591466739
>black pussy

that's a horse m8

>>591457988
I now love dolphins

And why haven't anyone linked any videos of this being done?

I'm disappoint, /b/

>>591460504
>Blowhole job
>killer whale
Ohgodthefishpuns

Hows that endless cum fluid called?
Also, more vagos pls

>the year is 2023
>dolphin and cetacean fuckery is mainstream
>fat feminist cunts get buttmad that men would rather fuck actual whales as opposed to their planetary asses

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dolphom fun times

Please god, let this be archived

>>591468451
Would prob be more something like this https://soundcloud.com/buygore/dolphinattack

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>>591468977
plz don't insult horse pussy like that

There used to be a website in the early 2000s dedicated to this. I'm sad that it doesn't exist anymore. It made me laugh a lot.

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>>591469250

>>591469376
God dolphins are so sleek and sexy

I would give anything to be mounted like that by a female dolphin

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What about fucking the blowhole for a bit?

>>591457988
Are those first two points true? If so, that's fucking hot

>>591469818
How would they breathe?

>you will never be sexually dominated by a female dolphin

light femdom and dolphin cunts yes please

inb4 /dfg/ - Dolphin Fucking General

>>591468839
Its our pleasure

>>591470039
push it in, take it out. wait a bit, push it back in, and repeat

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dolphin cum tastes funny tho

>>591468808
Thank you anon for sparing me the effort.

>tfw you will never penetrate the soaking wet vag of a dolphin that's really horny and wants you in it

>>591470311
How will you set up a safe word?

>>591470191
Do want.

>>591470494
i found the gif for this. also, i got a dolphin fingering video

>>591457988
Where the fuck am I gonna get a dolphin you stupid nigger, and if I get it where the fuck am I gonna keep it

>>591470191
needts to be made

>>591470598
the safeword is "IKKIKKIKK IK IK IK IKKIKKIIIKKII"

>>591470617
if you want the video just google videos "trainer loves his dolphin" HF

>>591457988
Get off of /b/ Patrick. And no, we are sick of seeing your stupid dolphin furry porn. Everybody hates you.

>>591457988
Is there any vids of this?

>>591470617
post dolphin fingering

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Oops sorry

>>591460385
Post link to video plz

>>591470617
Post that shit, Nigga!

>>591470848
no thanks

>>591470848
thats slightly.. stran..
I bonered

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Oops I posted it

>>591470848
i dont want it, i have a link for it.

>>591470922
https://www.gaybeast.com/movie/55662/mmnn

its about 27 seconds long. dolphin swims up, he slips a finger in, slides it about a bit then it swims off.

>you will never shoot your hot human cum into the eager cunt of a horny dolphin

>>591465538

Abalone are good fucks

File: eating my chick out.gif (2MB, 255x190px) Image search: [Google]

2MB, 255x190px

>implying dolphin pussy is better than chickun
>mfw

>>591457988
>implying that anyone of /b/ has ever dated a woman

>>591471258
>gaybeast

Nope, no thanks, I thought it would be straight. I am never, stepping foot onto that site

>>591465548
Where'd you get your degree in marine biology?

"and they often do" haha you're trying too hard fag

>>591471344
tastes like chicken

>>591471229
>>>/vp/

fuck off pokephile

File: 1362380094230.jpg (32KB, 509x369px) Image search: [Google]

32KB, 509x369px

>>591471344
What the actual fuck did I just see

>>591464267
idk why i have this erection