help, my lizard's dying
I got this bearded dragon like 3 years ago and I've only seen the thing take a shit like 5 times. Recently its been refusing to eat and this morning it started to go apeshit and lose its mind - Running around in circles, flipping itself over, eating dirt and flailing around with its mouth open. It's fucking crazy and it wont eat any food or water I offer no matter how hard I try. I'm scared to even pick up this half-dead lizard and I'm not sure if I should try to keep it alive or put it out of it's misery.
I was going to post this in /an/ but this is pretty fucked up and I thought /b/ would be a more fitting place for this thread. wat do
also am i a bad person?
ITT: ways to kill a lizard
Tie a bunch of balloons to its limbs and send it on an a rollicking action-packed adventure.
run them in some warm water in a tub they tend to release there shit more in water and put more calcium in his diet and give him some banana and kale also wat the temperature in his tank
I hope u are fucking joking. Coz of not u are a real asshole. Its suppose to poop every day and if it did not u dod not look after it. Wrong food and no luke warm baths. You killed it, dickhead
Open up your heart chakras and send it positive and loving energy as you swiftly smash it's head in with a large and heavy object OR wait to see if it gets better. Your choice, buster.
keep him there let relax nigga ur bearded dragon was under stress for whatever reason i shud know i got a bunch
Lizard Wizard confirmed for making it.
FUCKING HORRIBLE HABITAT! Needs space tile warmth uvb and I am sure you have not provided even close to a decent diet...what does the lizard eat!? Lizard should shit every fucking day you fucking idiot!
He's moving around a bit now but hes still keeping his eyes closed and he hasn't eaten the cricket yet.
And fwiw if he does survive, I'll try to find someone more caring to give the lizard to lol
just throwing food in front of an animal isnt going to make it eat. dont force the food near his face or try to keep moving him and shit, cause youll only stress him out even more.
Lizards should have vegetables and fruits, man.
Their body is an ecosystem just like any other animal and it needs a variety of different vitamins and nutrients to survive. Just because the motherfucker is a reptile doesn't mean he don't gotta have vitamins SHEEEEEEEEIT
I think the question should be asked. It's important to question people when they lack responsibility.
How the fuck do you think we got to 2014?
When some fucking guy can't even take care of a lizard the question of "WHY" should be asked.
God only know this motherfucker will probably have a kid one day and he should figure out why he's fucking up with his lizard so he can avoid the same situation with a human being.
Actually you're dead fucking wrong. The question of "why" generally leads to jack shit. You need to tell people why they were in the wrong, all "why" will get you to is "I don't know" kind of bullshit, and "I don't know" does not get you anywhere either.
AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! No. Get involved on a BEARDED DRAGON FORUM! Give the guy a warm bath and let him fucking rest. They sleep at night. Tomorrow give him a salad of water cress/turnip greens/or collard greens and butternut squash as well as cut up soaked prunes and a bit of coconut oil. GET THE GUY VITAMINS! Calcium with and without d3 as well as herp vit. Offer him crickets but dubia roaches are better. If he doesn't take fine. Give him a warm bath three times a day! Put tile in his tank. Get a larger tank. Make sure his tank is 85 plus and get a UVB NOW! He may survive if Octo Mom shows.
poor guy.. /dont get a lizard if you don't have time for them.
Eyes open now.
I feed it crickets, superworms and sometimes romaine lettuce. It only actively eats superworms though.
I replaced the water once already
It needs calcium and a UVB light - poor thing probably has metabolic bone disease. You can feed them collard greens soaked in a calcium supplement from a local pet store. With those two things he might have a chance.
They eat leaves and fruit if they can get it and the occasional insect. I had one as a kid and i fed it lettuce, cheap frozen vegies and about a teaspoon of dog food a week and the occasional cricket i caught. I also used to take it outside to bask in the sun 3 or 4 times a week.
dont let him drink too much.. give him some damn heat.. currently have a heat lamp er something in there?
he needs some light and feed him when hes nice and toasty. clean that fucking cage and give him a baking spot where he can stand on under the heat.. he probably mad stressed from bsimg raised by a faggot.. most likely identity issues
OP. With posts like this it's best for you and (and the lizard) if you don't get offended.
You should really be objective towards yourself (if you haven't been already) and realize that you 're being completely irresponsible and lazy.
what the fuck OP
why the hell do you even have this dragon? You obviously have no fucking idea on what you are doing
poor thing looks so sick
stupid faggot, its not that hard to do some research on google on how to take care of one
this is what happens when faggots decide they want a lizard or snake and have no fucking clue, if its bound up with shit bathing in warm water may save its life but it looks pretty fucked. maybe do some research into setting up a vivarium right with UV, basking lights and heat gradients, proper diet, calcium and vitamin supplements. get off the fucking playstation and read a book you cock gobbler
Google is your friend.
I can't tell because of your amazing quality picture, but are those woodchips?
If so, it makes sense since you're probably too fucking retarded to know what it needs to eat and drink, nor what temperature to keep the cage at.
My beardie lived 12 years, she just recently passed, but she was a badass. YOUR beardie, however, is forever shamed because it's owner is two I.Q. points away from needing a helmet and assistance with eating. If anything, it is trying to kill itself to get away from you; just like most people/animals around you probably try to.
Congratulations OP, you might be the biggest fucking idiot in the world. I'd say you should kill yourself, but you'd load the shotgun wrong or take sugar pills on accident. So DON'T try to kill yourself, OP, so I have solace in knowing you'll eventually fuck that up and nobody will have to deal with you again.
They certainly can "feel" as in perceive physical stimuli, we're not talking about "feelings" like that here you dolt.
I know you're trolling, but if you wanna talk about reading books, how about you help yourself to a fuckin high school biology textbook you idiot
1. Get a UVA light for the night, and a heat basking lamp for the day. Also, put some fucking greenery in the tank and take him out for short periods of time for exercise.
2. Tomorrow, give him kale and bananas, and other calcium rich foods. Gradually wean him off of crickets for the next week or so, diversify his diet.
3. Leave him in the shallow warm water bath for tonight, but keep a VERY close eye one him.
4. MOST IMPORTANT: GET A HEATING ROCK. Bearded dragons bask on top of heating rocks to get heat from their bottom and stomach and heat from the top from basking lights. Heating rocks will undeniably make him shit a normal amount at a normal pace, so THIS IS IMPORTANT.
5. Stop giving it romaine lettuce fuckwit it's poisonous to them.
Pro-tip: Your beardie is looking really bland and pale on his coat. That isn't good. He should be shedding his skin every 1-2 months. Do the above instructions and he'll be up an running in a couple weeks.
GO TO THE FUCKING VET ASAP
This thread made me laugh so much. Thanks op.
But honestly just help your lizard out man. You're like it's god, you're all it has In this world and it probably loves you.
But I wouldn't take it to the vet, that's a waste of money. At least smash it's head In with a hammer if you don't like it.
OP barely even replies even though 90% of the people in here are taking time out of their days?nights to give him some proper fucking advice.
You're too lazy to take care of a lizard and your own fucking thread.
Jeez man, if this is an accurate representation of the way you treat everything in your life NEVER. HAVE. CHILDREN
yeah crickets are shit food for dragons, they have almost zero nutritional value unless they are dusted/gutloaded. that wood chip is dodgy as fuck too, just get some zoo med carpet or fine desert sand and wet it down and make it firm (even sand is a bit iffy)
ITS GOING TO FUCKING DIE ANYWAY SEND THAT DEPRESSED NIGGER INTO SPACE YOU FAGGOT.
Heat rocks are not recommended as they can burn them. A heat lamp is enough
I'm not sure what you meant about having a light at night, but it should be dark at night lol use a ceramic bulb if it gets really cold
don't leave him in the water all night, 15 mins at a time is good enough
The internet. Unbounded by a life of rules.
Don't try to tell these people to act a certain way.
I'm sure you can find a thread full of people shitting on each other and posting gore. PEEP THE CATALOG, FUCKER
First pray to God for forgiveness... ask him to help you save the lizard. not jesus.
that thing needs the son and maybe a dab of honey... not weed but some actual honey.it also needs natural sunlight. around a shaded area...lizards can recoop its not going anywhere...it may be the end though... im telling you bring it outside tomorrow if you really fucking CARE!
A healthy dragon should poop on there own with just a heat bulb. I've read a lot of bad things about the heat rocks, so I personally don't trust them.
Also if they havnt shat for a few days, a warm bath and slightly rubbing there tummy will help them pass it
Looks like he's sleeping now. I'll turn the lamp off when I go to sleep and try to feed him again tomorrow.
I've been reading all the replies, just been busy looking after the lizard lol
^not my post btw
Thanks for the advice guys. If he gets back up and running, I'll still give him away though. Anyways, I'm out. Goodnight
You don't want a heating rock directly beneath a beardy it will burn them. Also Romaine is not poisonous to a beardy. For a list of approved foods for them visit beautifuldragons.com - I swear it's not a dragon dildo website.