I'm bleeding. Help!
>>583486787
Help who?
youre ass is bleeding?
We're humans here, toilet. Go ask a plumber.
OP i had a similar problem earlier
There's a lot of blood and I can't stop it.
OP is dead, abandon thread
>>583486787
use a fucking tampon bitch
If not, goto the hospital ffs
That's called menstruation.
Nevermind, no grills at /b/
Bad Dragon is not for everyone
Was the dick too big?
>>583487424
that's too bad, I was really hoping you could stop bleeding long enough to clean your disgusting goddamn bathroom before you upload another disgusting photo of your improverished living conditions
call 911
Die faggot
>>583487559
Not a chick. Not having my period. It's bleeding from my dick hole. I have no idea what to do.
>>583487424
timestamp with blood or gtfo
>>583487868
Cut it off faggot
>>583487868
Don't fuck with the dickhole, dude. Take that shit to the ER
>>583487424
I know the feeling
>>583487424
>>583487424
squeeze some toilet paper between your cheeks and press them together
>>583487868
Dickhole or gtfo
>>583487868
well thats a fatal wound, so id suggest filling out your last will and testament.
you have about 3 minutes before you bleed out.
>>583486787
you're just becoming a woman.
>>583487868
Paramedic fag here.
Picture? What happened? How long has the bleeding been going on? I'd suggest the ER if this is real.
there is nothing you can do.
you will wake up dead from eternal bleeding.
you can go to the ER or wait till your dick shrives up and becomes useless
>>583488356
> Eternal bleeding.
Haha, wonderful.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yRHvpYIJQMw
>>583487868
Go to the ER, the fuck you waiting for?
take elestic band and tie it around your dick
make it tight or you won't stop the blood
>>583487109
top kek
Ebola
Try meth
>>583488297
Stomach pains for the last few days. Bleeding started today.
>>583488591
cum on it
Well this made my boring night a lot more seemingly pleasant.
>>583486787
ready this
>>583488740
>>583488591
KEK man go to fucking ER instead of posting
>MFW i see this post
>>583487109
underrated post
>>583486787
Call an ambulance you retard
>>583488591
the fuck nigger??
absolutely, DO NOT call or go to the hospital. they will treat you like shit, trust me. go to the nearest CVS or 711 and buy some rubbing alcohol. apply it on to some cotton balls, and then, this is the important part, shove it up your asshole. it will slightly tingle you but just trust me. this stops the blood flow going past the rectum tubular vein. wait about 15-60 minutes, and then give me your updates. i will give you directions on what to do next
>>583488898
Kidney stones, have fun and buy a bite guard
Can we get a faggot to suck the bloody cock? Sounds like a great webm
>>583488898
Ok, I want you to press on the right and left of your lower back. Is palpaiting those areas painful?
Do you have a fever? Did you hurt yourself in anyway recently?
You need to go to the ER, bro.
It could be a UTI
>>583487424
>>583487803
Im an alcoholic. I make money and pay rent and have nice stuff. Not impoverished. This is what my toilet looks like
>>583486787
picture of damaged area. I am a doctor, i will tell you what to do to stop it. You have ammo lying around?
op
It's okay. Just ulceration of your intestines.
>>583489701
you look impoverished motherfucker.
Alcoholics that get by in life are not messy.
"this is a fact"
>>583489442
No fever. No recent injuries, but touching my back hurts. I don't wanna go to the ER. No insurance.
>>583489701
Alcoholic, have you been puking lately?
>>583486787
YOu busted a haemorrhoid is all.
>>583489701
Cut your dick off already faggot, give us blood, or just show us dick
>>583490062
your going to die have fun :)
>>583490102
Have you been drinking any homemade alcohol?
>>583488024
AAAAAAAAGH!!!!!!!
>>583490005
No man, its called I work hard and party at least as hard. Ever been in a party house?
>>583490102
I do drink a lot (6 four lokos per day) but I dont puke
>>583487353
>>583488026
Well, at least you tried.
>>583490308
God damn it I love /b/
>>583490514
you're fucked man
>>583490514
Your organs are failing. ER dude.
>>583490514
>drinks a shitload of alcohol
>doesn't know how a fucking kidney stone is made
>>583490062
well shit, what you coming to /b/ for? Being trolled won't make it better, and i really doubt doctors are here.
>>583490514
Kidney stones?
>>583490514
>>583490385
>>583490102
>>583489701
This is now an AA thread. I drink when I wake up.
>>583490514
It's either get medical help or accept the risk of losing your cock.
Going to have to request a picture of your dick with timestamp please.
>>583490514
why are you asking /b/
Is op still alive
>>583491136
You sir, must be drunk
>>583490062
Ok, I'm nearly certain that you have either a UTI or some other issue stemming from your kidneys. I cannot stress this enough, you absolutely have to be seen for this. You don't fuck around with organ dysfunction, this could lead to kidney failure and by your bleeding I don't think you're far off from it.
If you still want to resist going to an ER, I would see if you could some how get your hands on an antibiotic and take them for as long as possible. However, if this an injury, it will obviously have no effect.
>>583490514
Insurance or not got to ER or DIE
>>583490605
Do it fag
>>583491237
very
>>583490062
OBABO CARE MOTHERFUCKER
>>583491136
violent puking can cause some damage, just eliminating the possibility. If you don't want to get medical help, try to get some antibiotics.
>>583490891
It's faster then yahoo answers and the webMD comment sections. It doesn't hurt my dick, but when I push on my stomach, it's a stabbing pain.
>>583490062
When you're bleeding from your dick you go to the hospital mate. Fuck insurance.
>>583491394
Keystone ice and soko 100 proof. You sir?
>>583491562
GO TO A FUCKING CLINIC OR DIE! If you choose the latter livestream it fucker
go to free clinic in ghetto and give fake info you nigger
Have you been rough with your cock while making the bald man puke?
>>583489701
dude try to get vitamin B12 could be an ulcer or gastritis, but that seems like a lot of blood hope you feel better probably an ulcer if you puke blood anyway it is pretty fucked up, try to get your blood clean it really helps seriously.
>>583490062
>>583491290
Medfag here. He's right, get help ASAP. Sounds like it's your kidneys. By ASAP I mean right fucking now.
>>583491562
Very well could be a kidney stone resting in your bladder or somewhere in your ureters. I would go to the hospital immediately to be sure.
>>583491562
you are going to die, ask a doctor, or a mortician.
>>583490062
Dial 911 right fucking now! No one gives a Shit about insurance. Go, Now. Now!
>>583491562
left or riight side? your directions also
>>583491598
Then the motherfucker goes into debt, op, here is what you do.
>invite close friend over
>you take 10 shots of vodka
>have him operate on you because hospital is for richfags
>sew yourself back up with needle and fishing line
And or cut off dick and timestamp
>>583491562
Kidney stones
No doubt about it,
Self-taught medical expert
So you take pictures and post to an image board? Go to an emergency room you fucking moron. No insurance? Give a fake name or fuck the bill.
>>583491843
When did I become the OP??? Anonymous alcoholics thread confirmed
>>583491562
Liver is failing or ulcer or urethra snaped if you were wanking but go to er you will feel faint after you lose a pint
>>583489157
>this is the important part, shove it up your asshole
my extremitys
Suck the blood out of your own dick. Problem solved.
>>583491562
BRAVO! BRAVO!
Continue on maestro!
This is 9\10 bait material.
>>583491543
I made a record about like two weeks ago puked like about 100 times bro seriously almost died
real bad experience
>>583491562
go to ER
don't bring id
don't give real name
since you seem to be dieing they have to treat you. when they finish treating you leave quickly
>>583492256
From what?
Make your asshole bleed
>>583492062
What do you use trilby mcfagtip, Wikipedia?
>>583492256
Cut back on the EtoH, get healthy, have your cock looked at by a Dr. and rethink your life.
is op still alive?
>>583490062
Give a fake name you moron. You sound like you have kidney stones but I'm just a pharmacist-phag. Money is no good if you're fucking dead either.
Is there no way I can wait this out? If the blood coagulates?
>>583487353
are you a crab
>>583492707
Blood from your dick in any amount for any amount of time is bad. Doctor now or you're a true faggot.
>>583492707
Nigger the bleeding isn't the issue your fucking organ is failing YOUARE DYING CALL 911
Op is fake faggot goat whore cocksucker bloody shit smeared asshole licker.
>mfw OP bleeds to death out of his dick
>>583492707
are the white part of your eyes turning tan-yellow? If yes, your liver is failing.
>>583492707
yeah keep bleading til u burst
>>583492214
Then timestamp
You could always try fucking a virgin and eating two onions.
>>583492875
Mfw
>>583492707
Going into my 3rd year of med school. Fist thing that comes to my mind is that you have basement membrane damage in your kidneys. Specifically nephritic syndrome. Shit isn't something you want to fuck around with. You need to see doctor. The longer you wait the more fucked you're going to be. Fuck the insurance situation.
>>583492519
No, I occasionally study on /b/
>>583493163
Or fuck the onions and eat the virgin
>>583492707
You need to be seen now, the bleeding isn't as much as an issue, rather the cause of it should be what scares you.
I highly doubt you can ride this out without some permanent damage. Even if it's kidney stones, bleeding this much is not good.
i hope you guys realize that >>583489701 isnt op
>>583493432
Topkek faggot, ever read this?
>/b/ - Random
The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
>>583489062
>mfw reaction, mfw greentext
no shit sherlock, fuck off back to reddit
>>583493680
I hope you realize I'm outside your house faggot
>Medfag here
Nigga go get your ass to the ER, sounds like a schoolbook example of kidney stones
>blood from dickhole
>Bloodfromdickhole
>bloodfromdickhole
Touching back hurts:
Lower back? mid back? upper?
Need location fegit
>pain in abdomen
If this shit is real: go to a hospital a.s.a.p.
Also: pain comes in waves? Intensity fluctuating?
IF YES:
VERY FUCKING PROBABLY KIDNEY STONES
HOSPITAL MOFO HOSPITAL
>>583493917
look who it is
>>583486787
>Hurr i can't go to hospital, too expensive and no insurance
What the fuck nigger, you prefer not spending your money over your health?
Only in america
>>583489075
this is the gayest gif ever
>>583493986
are you a webMD?
Hospitals are for women having babies.drink some whuskey. Stroke it hard. Go night night
>>583491121
And with lacerations on it too
>>583494034
Who? Your mother's butt plug?
>>583488024
Shit made my dickhole and asshole clench up
If you bleed from your ass alot get to the doctor
I'm drunk. I can fall asleep. This might become an hero thread so if anyone ever finds this (E), i fucking love you. You are a gift and i hope my nephew realizes all his dreams. (G), you're the best friend a dude can have. (M), I love you.
If OP lived in another country he would already be in the hospital laying in bed, eating good food, and playing video games. Fuck america and its insurances
>>583494406
Naw medstudent.
Talking about this I need to go to fucking sleep, op better hurry up, it's 8:30 in the morning here and I have to review a ton of shit of the past week regarding cellular mechanisms.
>>583494752
lol
captcha judah wastexp
>>583494752
See you in hell, beautiful faggot
Hit your dick with a hammer
>>583494752
u fucked up op. U HEAR ME? YOU FUCKED UP
knock knock
Whats that? Oh its just DEATH KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR
Captha: hopes eiriesr
>>583494752
Get help by calling 911 you moron.
Otherwise, see you later, faggot.
>>583494752
Dis nigger, you're risking your life for fucking chump change?
>mfw
sharpie in the peehole
>>583488660
oh god thta reminds me... saw on fb, someone posted her pic with some sort of "feminine" wisdom about being a mother, and asked to like the pic if you agree.
the average person really is retarded
>>583494752
Nigga you have kidney stones. If it agreed part of your urethra go to the hospital.
>no insurance
>obama care law
>>583493396
don't listen to this fancy shmancy "medschooler" OP just use a blow dryer to help dry the blood that's coming out
Try to get a hard on.
Can't believe you faggots are buying this. Fake ass bitch Nigga thread. Cats are faggots. You know?
WE HAVE TO SAVE OP
>>583494752
you're dying like a btich
>>583494768
obabo's fault
>>583492707
Dude you're dying
>>583488473
And the wake up dead. He pulled in two
Stop with the faggot cat thing please?
>>583488591
dickhole's bleeding better timestamp
>>583495508
That monkey son of a bitch
>>583495729
Fuck you faggot
>>583495005
Would upvote if possible
>>583495595
>>583495486
He won't die /tonight/.
The damage of this not being treated could lead to permanent dysfunction or death in the future though.
OP, do you have the pic were the guy showed his self-circumcised cock?
is op kill?
>>583492875
>mfw
Sir. I am by far the largest alcoholic that frequents this hell hole.
My toilet is clean.
You can clean a toilet drunk.
You're just not a functioning alcoholic.
>>583495220
not with the print on that bench. fucking hideous
>>583494752
RIP
>>583495595
Fuck it! I'm drinking and smoking cigs. If I go to sleep and not wake up, it's fine.
>>583494752
>>583495880
Gidamn faggit!! I'm really mad now. Heaven ain't no biotech!!
Where the hell is the /b/ that I used to know? Some one here must be able to track where this dude lives. This dude needs an ambulance whether he wants it or not.
>>583496203
newfag
>>583494752
Sleep it off, you'll be alright in the morning.
>>583496203
Retard faggot is fake
>>583496152
Goin out because of a bloody dick is a bitch way to die
Also, seriously, if I dony wake up. /b/, thank u for the laughs.
>>583496152
>yfw you leave messages for your family and loved ones on an imageboard filled with CP and gore.
>>583496409
Post a thread tommorow if you live
>>583496152
op, you're a dumb nigger. dying of blood dick is the most faggot way to die behind having a rabbi drink the blood while you die
>>583496409
If you care so much about dying then why not ggo into debt first (by going to the er)
>>583496152
At least time stamp dick you fucking twat
>>583496203
so many newfags who don't know how to set up a proxy via gui to trace his ip to hack into his database of his computer to find out where he lives
>>583496409
Dony, you are going to die! Good Night!
>>583496203
Newfag confirmed
>>583496409
fuck you retard, i hope you really do die ;^)
>>583496123
i require timestamped pics of the bottles of what youve been drinking right now.
prove your alchoholism!
>>583492875
>mfw
Ever herd of a ambulancerminaner
>>583487868
It's a kidney stone or cancer of the bladder.
This is the only time you hope it's a kidney stone. Is there any pain?
>>583496771
i hope he goes to HEAVEN hahahahahahhaahahahaha get it? cuz your id is heaven hahahaha.... fuck my life
>>583496409
>>583496771
samefag
>>583496920
read the thread
Heaven is a punk bitch
>>583496409
Probably going to wake up, I can say nothing about possible permanent damage being done by the possible condition(s) you might be suffering from in the mean time...
I mean this could mean losing 1 kidney, perhaps both, perhaps it's "merely" a kink in your urethrea from shoving shit in it and you're bullshiting about the rest, I wouldn't have a fucking clue.
If you get permanent damage, remember the orange anon that warned you about it..
Also merifags: he's going to be living of your wellfare not mine, HF paying for this idiot.
>>583496302
>>583496302
Been here since 07. /b/ has done some pretty spectacular like that the few times they work together as a cohesive unit
I think your toilet is possessed. Call a priest, STAT.
>>583486787
I don't care!
Fuck off!
Die!
>>583496474
*anonymous imageboard filled with CP and gore.
>>583497131
I've been on 4chan since '07 now and before everyone starts screaming 'troll' and 'copypasta' I know that I'm not an oldfag. Oldfags discovered 4chan 2005 and before.
All this 'cancer' and 'lack of original content' is bullshit. /b is the best it's ever been and I'm going to show you why. Firstly, /b/ finally has a good userbase and more coming in every day. We have a diverse and interesting community and everyone seems to fit in and be able to find people they can relate to.
Secondly the original content is fantastic. New memes like Boxxy, Advice dog variations (including regret guy), rage comics and making fun of minorities are funny as hell and represent what /b/ is best at. Copypasta isn't all that bad; it's what makes a meme and most of the time actually inspires new works of art.
Thirdly 4chan finally has the recognition and fame that it deserves. Moot is a well-known name and 4chan has it's own wikipedia page for people to learn about our culture. We've even been on TV. I've even found friends that I've known for ages are actually /b/tards but we didn't know it; and anyone that doesn't know about it I explain to them what 4chan is all about and why they should participate.
I love this place - 4chan is my home away from home and you should love it too.
>>583489442
>>583491290
Hey anon , not OP but i got a question. Is drinking 1-2 glasses of red wine per day good for your health?
Also after having sex I feel like my legs are jiggly and I can't stand up, I have to sit or lay down for a couple of minutes until I normalize is this normal?
I'm masturbating to this thread
TOASTING IN LE EPIC BREDD
SCREENCAP LE EPIC BREDD
>>583497316
/b/ hasn't had cp and gore since 2006 child. You are lucky I am gracing you with my presence I browse /b/ maybe once every two months now.
>>583497026
>>583496409
pain...
It's probably bladder cancer. You need to go to the ER, they'll see its cancer and you won't have to pay for shit because the state will take care of it.
I don't want to say kidneys because it would be more brown.
>>583486787
So..much...blood...must......take pictures....for lulz on /b/...
>>583497607
dont care
>>583497347
Thats nice but OP seems to have just given up anyways. So fuck em
>>583497381
Google it yourself, fucking goyim.
Also because I know you're a lazy motherfucker
Use your own fucking brain:
>whine>alcohol>goodforhealth
Very probably fucking goddamn not, it's not good for your braincells that much is sure
Might be "good" for your vesc. system but the amount of "good"it'll do can easily be replaced by going to mcdonalds less often fatty
I'm off now, goyim OP can suck his dick dry idgaf anymore. fucking retard
>>583497607
I saw CP on here earlier today. Gore threads every day.
I've worked up a good stroke. Someone say something nasty to make me cum
>>583492336
This. This entirely. If you're still worried get someone to take you to an out of county doctor. They can't charge someone they can't identify
>>583497943
Hillary Clinton
>>583497347
>>583497607
>You are lucky I am gracing you with my presence
>>583497607
Gore still exist although its severely under rated and I've never seen CP not that I look for it but see the same fucking pizza beg thread 5 times a day
>>583486862
wwwww
>>583497347
Agreed, but op needs to put his dick in a blender, like this motherfucker
>>583492707
Please go to the doctor.
>>583496409
No you ass, go to the hospital, use a fake name if you have to! Basically, do NOT fuck with your urethra. This advice coming from multiple paramedics. Go to the hospital. If you have to hold your doctor at gunpoint, that is what you must do, but seriously go to a hospital. First time I've ever given this advice, and I watched a dude cut his testicles open and pour mustard all over them and didn't lift a finger. Seek help goddamnit.
>>583497920
I'm 85kg 190cm m8. I do however agree I have put on some fat the past 6 months.
Actually I started feeling feinty after sex after gaining some weight.
>>583496409
Honestly dude, just pay for the fuckin ambulance instead of sitting in the ER for literally 10 hours tomorrow. Fastest medical solution of your life if you just call. It's night anyway, the ERetards won't have filled the lobby
>>583496409
why did you post your problem here in the first place if you knew it's an emergency?
attention nigga
>>583497931
The blond one in the bed blowing a guy off, saw that, put more here if you want to(get vanned)
>>583497931
sauce of GTFO
>>583498030
Thanks!!I did it
>>583498506
He was a nigger too.
>>583496050
Back to reddit, feggit
Thread is topkek g'day OP
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jNFgynmVmx0
OP IS KILL
P
I
S
K
I
L
L
man ppl overreact in these threads. ppl these days rush to the doctor on the slightest whim. where has the toughness of a man gone? if you got a tiny thorn in your foot youd probably rush to the er wouldnt you? fucking pansies. you guys are the reason that the er is constantly overcrowded, and ppl with REAL emergencies dont get seen for like 6 hours. just man up, jesus. you have lost VERY little blood. when i had a UTI in the war, i was filling up a 40 oz bottle of mickeys with blood, every few hours, and then id just zip up and go on with my day. dont underestimate the human bodies ability to heal.
This is from a thread were the guy circumcised himself, fellas.
>>583486787
>OH MY GOD I'M BLEEDING PROFUSELY
>BETTER GO POST ON /B/
>>583496409
Love you too faggot, now die
Cuck cuck cuck
Cuckold cuckold cuckold
>>583499259
Hi /pol/.
I literally did this about 5 minutes ago.
shhhh. don't let /b/ know though.
>>583496787
Not even a month of bottles..
My gf makes me store them in the basement after awhile.
I keep telling her Im gonna get a dremmel and make them into bongs.
Fuck it.
>>583490891
BEING TROLLED WON'T MAKE IT BETTER?!??!1