Greentext that's god tier
I will start off you negrums
>you're fucking up kiddo
Not a ylyl thread but glad it made you happy
I was rocking back and forth in my chair so fucking hard laughing at that
Only the best for you my /b/rethren
I'm running out of greentexts anons.Help me out here!
i think about this one from time to time, always laugh.
Exactly as the file name >implies
Friends I bring you OC this just happened to me last week.
>be alone at home with sister
>I am in finance and sister is going to college
>both of our parents died in a wreck and I take care of her / pay for college and stuff
>anyway its like 3 am I am up late at night watching some bumfuck crisis in russia / european timezones that could influence my early morning trades
>get sleepy and figure I can get in 2 hour nap before work
>turn off everything in front room and start to head upstairs
>undress and get ready for bed
>suddenly remember "fuck didn't plug in laptop"
>put on my jeans because didn't want to walk naked downstairs and run into my sister
>about to enter living room and turn on light when I Suddenly hear the fucking french doors in covered patio next to living room being pushed on hard
>no fucking way someone is trying to break in!
>have a small gunsafe in living room hall closet with a handgun and alarm panic button installed near it
>push alarm and snag my handgun this takes maybe 20 seconds
>I can literally only hear blood rushing in my ears and am scared shitless
>turn on my light in living room and shout out 'I have a gun and the cops are on there way"
>shoving on door instantly stops and I hear 2-3 voices shout RUN RUN RUN RUN
>end up sitting crouching behind a wooden table I flipped over and was in iraq mode all over again
>grab housephone and call sister upstairs tell her to hide in closet someone was trying to break in and not come down stairs
>she is freaking out but listens to me
>cops take 35 minutes to show up
>I tell them everything info exchanged/ report filed / neighbors told / cancelled work
>decide I need to get 2 dogs
>go to shelter and adopt two amazing american staffordshire/ boxer mixes
>literally 65lb dogs made of muscle and no fear
>3 weeks pass without incident
>dogs trained and 1 sleeps in sisters room and one at the top / foot of the stairs depending on how he feels.
Will continue in second post i