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Nz fags

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

Thread replies: 301
Thread images: 53

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Nz fags
>>
>>580873274
central otago here whats up
>>
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Hello, boys!
>>
Who's ready for the classics exam tomorrow???
>>
>>580873749
The Night Walker Rises.
>>
Reporting in.

Fuck this job hunting shit
>>
>tfw Lorde won't answer your prayers.
>>
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>>580874068
Sup, cunt.
>>
>>580873994
Just write "Greeks were pedos" over and over again.
>>
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>>580874215
>pic

>>580873749
Bro, I'm thinking of walking through that park again i mentioned in the last thread
>>
>>580874156
I just got a job and moved to mt eden. Shits cash dawg
>>
>>580874441
>Bro, I'm thinking of walking through that park again i mentioned in the last thread
Life surely can't be that horrible for you?
>>
Did you know that Writing is 5000 years old?

But booze is 10,000 years old.
>>
>tfw got up at 07:02 and not sure if am or pm.
>>
Someone post a noode of sum hoe
>>
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Any of you faggots games ?
>>
>>580874612
Nah i just wanna experience pic related in the most suitable way possible. Shitting myself in a dark park full of swans and a bush walk seems like the appropriate context

>>580874497
on ya mate. But i'm a sack o' shit with no experience. I'll find something eventually
>>
>>580874906
Kingpin is such a great movie.
>>
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>>580874926
forgot pic
>>
>tfw you're the only person Bill Cosby didn't rape
>>
>>580874926
>But i'm a sack o' shit with no experience.

Me too, tell you what, I'll hire you and you hire me. You pay me a wage, I pay you and we both get rich.
>>
>>580874926
hit the gym now while you're looking for work man.changes peoples perspectives of you.
>>
>>580874926
Will you be buzzing when you go?
>>
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>>580875296
>>
>>580875371
nah trying to stay clean cause i lift

>>580875318
i lift
>>
>>580873994
I've also got geo, fuck it...
>>
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>>580874156
>tfw going for interview 11am tomorrow.

bj-lips reporting for duty.
>>
>>580875710
>nah trying to stay clean cause i lift
Bulking, cutting or maintaining? Because weed would help with bulking if you're a skinny cunt.
>>
>>580875823
what are you applying for?
>>
>>580875823
bruh.

Good luck

>>580876030
bulking but i'm not a hungry skelly so allgood

Alright guys going down to the shop to get some milk, but i'm going to purposely and ironically take a wrong turn. The album is an hour long so should be back by 9ish.

Pray for me, bros. I'm going to face the park again
>>
>>580875823
>bj-lips reporting for duty.
hai
>>
>>580876061
Local fruit processing plant are looking for sups. I was shortlisted. It's a celery position with company car, I hope I get it I'm currently earning a shit weekly wage.
>>
>>580876286
>Pray for me, bros. I'm going to face the park again
Fuck, this actually has me excited and I cannot hide it!
>>
>>580876373
>celery position

Is that a joke?
>>
>>580876332
harro. sleep yet?
>>
>>580876373
whats the pay?
>>
>>580876286
don't catch the aids

>>580876573
Food is not a joke anon..
>>
>>580876373
>>580876573
celery position with company car

>>580876575
Yes, with my eyes closed, too, two.
>>
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Palmy fag checking in
>>
>>580876818
dont take too much pills tonight k?
>>
>>580877171
I had one speedy pill today because I was getting dizzy and I've had one caffeine pill and that'll do me fine.

I got texted by a dealer that ripped me off to "come round for a smoke and a play" early this morning.

I think I've made it.
>>
>tfw can't remember if I'm John Key or not
>>
>>580877464
He ripped you off in the past or currently?

How many bloody pills have ya got ya man.

You sound like a bunch of fun right now Mr.Key.
>>
>>580877464
were you raped? :O
>>
>>580877721
I found a dealer off nzdating (lel), he said he only did 50s, I thought "Fucking sweet". Get the stuff, hadn't brought in years, think "This is a bit low".

Weight it and it's half a gram...

>How many bloody pills have ya got ya man.
I get them from the pharmarcy. I have nine left, I think and can refill my prescription on thr 30th.
>>
>>580878054
so you're 420in right now huh. yay for you duckie
>>
>>580878041
>were you raped? :O
No.

I stayed home because I'm not sexually attracted to him and I'm not that desperate for weed.

>maybe

A guy did say he had weed but I had to fuck him for it...
>>
>>580878445
dont do it m8! im seriously worried about you!
>>
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>>580878376
Oh, no, in the past.

I could get stuff from him but he ripped me off and he wants to "play" and I'm not keen.
>>
>>580878609
>dont do it m8! im seriously worried about you!
M-me why?
>>
>>580878709
I'm seeing a family member this weekend coming, He smokes everyday. I'll ask him if he's keen to hook me up and I'll let you know.
>>
>>580878941
cause you seem like a guy that needs extra protection and that can be harmed quite easily.
>>
>>580879131
Nah bro, his chest looks pretty buff.
>>
just bought a half ounce would hook u guys up if i knew ya
>>
>>580878970
>and I'll let you know.
Danke.

>>580879131
Oh, I don't quite know what to say to that. I could make jokes but I'm too embarrassed now.
>>
>>580879480
sorry man, just from what ive read of you. i didnt want to embarrass you. ;)
>>
>>580879396
>skinnyfat
>>
>>580879812
hardly skinny m8
>>
hamilton reporting in, just finished a late night project, what're you fags up to tonight
>>
>>580879736
What's given you that impression?\

Ohh, saying I'm a bit awkward and "have no friends"? Haha.
>>
>>580879879
Don't trigger me.
>>
>>580880027
yeah that and the fact youre extremely shy, have adhblabla and everything else you always write. how old were you again?
>>
>>580880158
Compared to me you're blimmin Hugh Jackman mode.
>>
>>580880195
>everything else you always write
Somebody has to help these threads reach the heights of Olympus.

>how old were you again?
Old enough to know better.
>>
>>580880584
true :D
i know youre somewhat over 25.
>>
>>580880279
>Hugh Jackman mode
A faggot married to a frumpy woman?
>>
>>580880993
You do? How?
>>
>>580881064
Maybe he loves her? Is that so hard to believe?!
>>
>>580881213
cause you wrote that. :D
>>
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>>580881231
Fucking settle down Lena Dunham

>his wife actually looks like a lovely woman
>people being nasty to her for no reason
>she gets to smell Hugh Jackman
>whose laughing now, bitches?
>>
>>580881413
Fuck you Germans and you good memories.

You probably have a file on me, too, knowing how much you lot like to organise things.
>>
>>580881519
I just get personally offended because sometimes I jerk off to older bitches.
>>
>>580881724
exactly, m8. because i have nothing better to do. you can find it under gay-nazi.docx. :D but seriously, thats exactly what IDBro does. :D
>>
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Whos unemployed here?
>>
Hamilton here, crafting a teddy bear
>>
>>580881857
>massive faggot
>gayer than a gay gaying up a gay parade of gay gays
>have crush on female school teacher
>butterflies when I talk to her
>her son is in my year at school
>her youngest son

Oh, Anon, she's one hell of a woman that one.
>>
>>580881906
>but seriously, thats exactly what IDBro does
Makes files on us all?

>hope he's saved the witty replies I've posted.

>>580881925
I thinm you'll find we're all unemployed in these threads, even the ones with jobs.
>>
>>580881925
Me. I'm an unemployed aimless drunk. I suppose I might be able to get a job if I tried, but I don't really desire anything except booze.
>>
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And Im back to having no life man these things are short lived
>>
>>580882423
yeah of course he is. he saves every single nz thread and writes down what we revealed of ourselves. :D fucking creep
>>
>>580882475
What happened that was different for some period of time?
>>
can we get some nudes going
>>
>>580882616
Did you see what was revealed last night when I revealed my email?
>>
>>580882643
I had people to talk to that werent on 4chan it aint no problem I move to wellington in 2 months Im sure I can find someone there who isnt a spastic
>>
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>>580882814
fuck it
>>
>>580882937
>wellington in 2 months Im sure I can find someone there who isnt a spastic
Obviously you have never been to Wellington.

It is full of hipsters and communists, often times they are one of and the same.

Face reality, bro, it's over.
>>
>>580882861
some mr_shoe_fish was it? what was revealed?
>>
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>>580883101
>>
>>580883224
>here we go again
>>
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>>580883292
>>
>>580883224
Oh, noona, no.

They'll find it and laugh at me again.
>>
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>>580883353
>>
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>>580883353
>>
>>580883153
Ive been to Wellington lol. Ive seen the blue haired fem dykes. There will be some one in that city who wants to sit somewhere and laugh at hem
>>
>>580883360
how do you know they are laughing when you cant see their faces? then write me personal, i can give you my hushmail. :D
>>
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>>580883527
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>>580883304
>>
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>>580883774
last one. cbf if no one else is posting.
>>
>>580883692
>who wants to sit somewhere and laugh at hem
Yeah but people from The Hutt Valley seldom have enough for the train fare in.

>>580883721
>you cant see their faces?
Because one person wrote superkek. I have to admit I had a god chuckle myself.

>god chuckle

>>580883721
>then write me personal, i can give you my hushmail. :D
What? ou want to chat outside of 4chan?
>>
>>580883992
post moar fgt
>>
>>580883992
don't post Maori bitches?
>>
>>580884158
who cares what they write?
and m8, yesterday i met someone outta 4chan, writing out of 4chan is npthing. especially not with hushmail. i wpuldnt give you my real email. :D
i wont internetrape you. :D
>>
ChCh fag checking in via San Francisco. How do m8s?
>>
>>580884209
why don't you fucknugget?
>>
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>>580883605
>>
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>>580884158
I guess Ill sponsor a huttian then send a weekly payment of 20 bucks just hire a friend
>>
>>580884419
Haha well you have mine already so if you want to send me an email you go and send me one little lady girl, child.
>>
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>Connection errors got me like
>>
>>580884718
done :D
>>
>>580883992
>>
>>580885120
Dongsaeng I am and sorry, so.
>>
>>580885120
That you IDbro?
>>
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>>580885457
Hell naw
>>
Putting on my shoes for a quick one across the bay.

Shoes? Ja
Glasses? Erm
>>
>tfw German noona emails you and she opens by saying "Sieg fucking heil you homosexual let's get high and kill ALL the Jews!

So this is love.
>>
>>580885457
Im just the guy with the "nigger flag"
>>
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>>580883992
>>
>>580885765
It's your Aryan duty to fill her full of babies, even if you are a faggot.
>>
>>580886091
dickhead
>>
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>>
>>580886091
>tfw brown hair and eyes

Keep the thread warm, boys. Park walker said he would be back at 9, I'm going to look for him, in a different city.
>>
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>>580885765
>>
>>580886269
It's just some affectionate teasing, I like the night walker as much as anyone. He's the sort that makes these threads wwork.
>>
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>>580886282
>>
>>580886461
>I like the night walker as much as anyone.
poof
>>
So how did the Sylvia park meet go?
>>
>>580886521
>>
>>580886381
lol thats exactly what i look like, too. we would never have blonde and blue eyes babies. :D
>>580886461
true story
>>
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>>580886694
>>
>>580886694
Is her name Kiana?
>>
Wait was parkbro meant to be back by now? My girlfriend is missing too.....
>>
>>580876472
>>580876742
Well no more walkies for me :(
>>
>>580887230
I'm back
>>
>>580887323
why
>>
>>580887650
My girlfriend just got home too wtf parkbro!

Why no more walks though?
>>
Anyone want to Fuck a land whale?
>>
>>580888290
might do, how much of a land whale are we talking? and where from?
>>
>>580873274
aussie here. NZ is an awesome country. that is all. :)
>>
>>580888290
That better not be you Laura.
>>
yaaaay we beat them filthy wales
>>
>>580887853
I went through the park again, saw the same fuckton of swans (I swear to christ I'm scared of swans now, the way they just stare at you), and then saw some cunt all in black walking in the far distance. I thought "fuck it, it's okay I can do this" and start walking to the same 2spooky4me bushwalk i took last time. Then i noticed he was walking to the same bushwalk, but as he walked he was staring at me the entire time. I thought "I should be alright, he won't rape me just keep walking" and then he stopped. I kept walking but he just stood there and stared at me. At this point I thought "fuck this shit" and pussied out. I turned around and walked away like a coward while keeping eye contact. I looked foward to see where i was going and when i turned around again i realised i had lost sight of him. The fucker completely disappeared. I turned straight on and power walked like a scared little girl all the way to the entrance from which i came and almost had a fucking heart attack when i saw this other couple entering. I hope they survived
>>
>>580888361
80-90kg on 150cm frame. Hamilton
>>
>>580888276
>>580888656
I didn't see her out mate, nor do i have any idea what she looks like. She was on her own adventure
>>
>>580888656
sounds interesting. have to do that too one day. :D
>>
>>580888290
>land whale
Sure whatever
>hamilton
That's a dealbreaker.
>>
>>580889032
ensure you listen to an album while you do it, makes the experience even better.

Weed'll probably help but as i said earlier, trying to stay clean for my lifting
>>
>>580889305
ok will do. tried that in germany too, but people are just too normal in germany. boooring
>>
>>580888779
poast snapchat i might fuck you
>>
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>>580889156
my sides
>>
>>580889440
i've been waiting two weeks and you still haven't posted your feet
>>
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>>580889851
todays your lucky day. im on my phone. :P
>>
>>580888779
oh, you, nvm

still that desperate aye
>>
>>580874714
Damn. That explains a lot of things.
>>
>>580890125
meanie. big girls need lovin too ya know.
>>
>>580890193
don't get me wrong, love me some big girls, just not that particular big girl
>>
>>580890023

Good work...

Still live in south aucks by chance?
>>
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Any of you cunts know where I can get a fake id?
>>
>>580890350
yes always have. :D why?
>>
>>580890389
>inb4 underage b&
>>
>>580890389
By not being underage b&
>>
>>580890435
Just wondering, it's been a while, didn't want to get the regulars mixed up

>>580890389
>guaranteed replies
>>
>>580888290
got wheels babe we'll show you a good time
>>
>>580890389
I want to hook you up, but if anyone arrests you and traces it back to me. I get kicked out of the country
>>
>>580890543
holy shit. you should make folders about each of us regulars like IDBro too. :D
>>
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>>580890487
>>580890476
I'm srs guys.
>>
IDbro in here yet?
>>
yo anyone got weed near mt eden?
>>
>>580890607
Godammit,I didn't know you got fucking deported for forgery.
>>
>>580890153
It's an interesting fact to be sure.
>>
>>580890804
been almost a week since i last was able to sco from my regulars
>>
>>580890708
eh. Just forgot whether unpatriotic german girl was from south aucks or not
>>
Auckland sluts anyone?
>>
Petone fag reporting in. Any welli nudes
>>
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>>580891238
>>
anyone living in queenstown or welli gton and willing to afford accomodation for my sister and me for one night? and wants to go out with us too? like partying?
hostels are fucking expensive.
>>
>>580888656
Was the other couple men?

What's the park?

>probably a cruising spot.

>I'm black.
>>
>>580891238
>>580891238
Always down for some Auckland sluzzas
>>
Can someone post the picture of the compilation of IDbros posts?
>>
>>580889305
>for my lifting
Post body pic
>>
>>580891260
ayyyyyyy. was good my nigga.
>>
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>>580891387
>>
>>580891476
>>580891360
Nah it was like a skinny fella and a shorter, wider girl.

Western Springs

And i'm going to post my body once I make it, so probably never :(
>>
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Faggots
>>
>>580891790
Timestamp or my penis stays in my jocks
>>
>>580891781
>Western Springs
Yeah, pretty sure people cruise there, aye.

I think that's the place people are told not to go because of how dangerous it is.

>>580891781
>post my body once I make it
Oh, please, I posted mine and I've got years of work a head of me.
>>
>>580891437
>>580891437
>>580891437
Anyone? I forgot to save it.
>>
>>580890125
>>580890289
y u no lik me?
>>580890595
where you at?
>>
>>580891976
Someone will have it.
>>
>>580892001
Post tits or gtfo
>>
>>580891973
if i get drunk one night during an NZ general i'll probably post it. I haven't even posted it on /fit/ bro.
>>
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>>580892001
If only you were in Hastings...
>>
>>580891878
You get a timestamp in exchange for shoe on head.
>>
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hawkes bay reporting

mfw exam in the morning with no study
>>
Christchurch bitches!
>>
>>580891017
They could rename the bible "The 8000 year hangover."
>>
>>580892302
I post on /fit/ all the time, you'll be fine.

Posted my face a number of times and got nice replies but favourtie, though was:

"The cold stare of the autist"

Haha.
>>
>>580892278
i didnt ask you anything
>>580892404
;_;
>>
>going for walk
>almost home
>car slowing down behind me
>fuck, that must be bj lips
>mfw it wasn't.
>>
Christchurch here cobbas. High as fuck on pharmos. What you cunts up to?
>>
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>>580892413
You'll get my milk and that's all you'll get. Bitch.
>>
>>580892680
Oh, what pharmos? Got any spare?
>>
Where is IDgod?
>>
>>580892518
nah too autistic mate kek sorry


Feel free to check out my milk though
>>
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>>580892576
Q_Q IKR!?!
>>
>>580892001
Tok can host got the good too
>>
>>580892413
You know, that necklace is *pretty* easy to recognize sweetie.

But posting names or the like would be a dick move, but all the same, just letting ya know.
>>
welli fag reportin, studyin for that classics exam.
buying weed tomorrow too god bless
>>
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>>580892860
>Feel free to check out my milk though
That's a dangerous thing to say to a homo faggot, son.

>why are you drinking trim milk on a bulk
>do you have funny tummy troubles?
>are you up the duff and so you have hemorrhoids?
>>
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>>580892759
THEN MILK IS WHAT YOU GET
>>
>>580893000
trips mang
sounds good, but no ride to there?
>>
>>580893318
I'm not a hungry skelly like i said before, so while technically i am bulking i'm also trying to avoid putting on fat. Moderation i suppose. Bulking, but staying conscious of fatty foods etc

And apologies for being inconsiderate
>>
>>580893102
Its also a pretty common necklace
>>
>>580892001
because you don't like me for the same reason that i don't like you
>>
>>580893416
>why are IDs even back
LOL

Nice tits too
>>
>>580893416
feet?
>>
>>580893682
Nz's only true meme
>>
>>580893619
Oh, that's right, I don't know why I keep thinking that.

>And apologies for being inconsiderate
Prove it with a picture.
>>
>>580893416
where you?
>>
bored in wellington, tits plz
>>
>>580893620
Common necklace + girl who *knows about* let alone *goes on* 4chan.

Admittedly I did not expect you to post photos like this, but hey, I'm hardly complaining.
>>
>>580893514
how ironic hahaha, cant pick you up sorry too inebriated post contact info so you can come down if your vehicle situation changes.
>>
>>580893781
Speaking of is IDbro in here or did I miss him?
>>
>>580893893
Close but I'm just posting the missus man, she's not a lurker
>>
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Feggits
>>
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>>580893859
>Hastings plz
>I wish
>>
>>580883101
Ew, beff heke
>>
>>580893919
>even when he's here I miss him
>>
>>580894065
Whatever you need to say, but that's chill.

I'll mention this next time I see you, the reaction will be delightful I'm sure. I doubt you'll expect it was me.
>>
>>580883153
Haha, it fucking is eh
>>
Nelson fag here
>>
>>580893641
i lik you
>>580893915
you got a throwaway email?
>>
>>580894257
sure you do
>>
>>580894229
Looking forward to it
>>
>>580894257
[email protected] send us a snapchat or something
>>
>>580894431
Gunna keep posting more of the 'missus'?

Won't deny it, thought about this a couple times but hey who hasn't...
>>
>>580891634
Are you holdin it down for petone? Mr hunter is dat u
>>
>>580894457
got no snapchat, also, who is us?
>>580894297
unless you are spagettifeg
>>
>>580894242
sup bruh
>>
>>580894561
jesus fuck you hadn't figured that out already?
>>
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>>580891260
kegan go to bed
>>
>>580894561
Would you be up for a gangbang?
>>
>>580893880
I hear that
>>
>>580894582

Just enjoying my days off before returning to the menial repetition that is work.
How goes it
>>
>inb4 NZ women don't shave
>>
>>580894652
has it been you for the past few days?
>>580894746
no..
>>
>>580894708
Stay out of this peter
>>
>>580894861
mebe
>>
>>580894778
Pretty good, almost got killed in a park earlier tonight but now just chilling in my undies. Still looking for a job
>>
>>580894861

Dropped. letrashman.jpg
>>
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>>580894496
Sure, sorry to burst your bubble though bro, the necklace was from Pascoes and is cheap and bulk produced
>>
>>580894889
no
>>
>>580895008
cut those fucking fingernails! jesus christ. Nice tit though
>>
>>580895008
Yeah but she wears it all the freaking time, plus how many couples are this open?

You're not making it hard...
>>
>>580895083
Its my scraping nail, grinder gets clogged to shit around the edges.
>>
>>580895108
>You're not making it hard...
You don't find his misses hot?
>>
>>580895250
>95250 â–¶
>>>580895108 (You)
>>You're not making it hard...
>You don't find his misses hot?


HA. WHAT YOU DID THERE. I SAW IT.
>>
>>580894861
Ah well,if you're ever down in Hastings,look me up.
[email protected]
>>
>tfw IDbros probably out drinking with his mates and I'm here at home sitting on the computer.
>>
>>580895108
True, what's your name?
>>580895304
Huehuehue
>>
>>580886049
Whats this chicks name?
>>
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>>580895304
>>
Idbro is still at uni.... Hes def drinking
>>
A mf couple were chill and very open promise it'll be fun
>>
>>580895470
>Mates
>>
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Goodnight bros.

See y'all tomorrow
>>
>>580895470
Yeah but we're here with you so...

Yeah, fuck, sad aye?
>>
is she from chch?
>>
>>580895650
Night bro
>>
>>580895650
Goodnight Kiwi
>>
Anyone sitting the eco exam
>>
>>580894561
>>580895625
>>
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>>580895650
Sleep well bro
>>
>>580895562
I'm sitting here requesting photos of your ladys tits, letting you know who I am is hardly a good idea.

I could be your flat mate, your long term friend - who knows?
>>
>>580892804
Sevredol. Not at this stage, need to get repeats
>>
>>580895818
Bah. Do that, I'd be keen to trade for some booze or something.

What's the high like?
>>
>>580895793
hmm sounds good, havent done that before
>>
Who has phismosis
>>
>>580895813
Figured as much, then you can obviously at least post the first letter of her name
>>
>>580895813
WE ARE ANONYMOO
WE ARE LEEGIN
>>
>>580895649
IDbro has a good social life. I can't wait for him to come home and shitpost here.
>>
>>580895813
>who knows?
You're his dad, aye?
>>
>>580895968
I'm hardly going to a.) confirm your suspicion that I have no clue who you are b.) give anyone else more clues. This can be my secret until we're a little drunk together. The look on your face will just be worth it.

I'll shout ya one of those awful fucking drinks you guys
insist on drinking for your trouble
>>580896004
Oh. Man. That would be perfect wouldn't it?
>>
Guys i wanna fuck my teacher but tuesday is my last day.... Any advice
>>
>>580895319
emailed man
>>
>>580896256
Wait 4 months, add her to facebook. Seriously, not that hard.
>>
>>580896234
Aaand dug yourself into a pit of fallacies, good game.
>>
>>580895896
It's just the pill form of morphine so warm and euphoric mostly
>>
>>580896458
Had you going there for awhile though right?

[For those of you playing at home, never had a clue who these people were. Totally would buy them a pint though for being good sports.]
>>
>>580896552
Neat. Jealous.

[Do hope you're okay though.]
>>
>>580896568
I wanna say yes but I'd be getting your hopes up
>>
>>580895928
Okay well get in touch we can flirt around a bit n organize a visit
>>
Guys im a virgin
>>
>>580896668
Just a fucked up back, will be sweet as. Been off work for a few weeks. What town you in?
>>
>ask so much wheat today and now feel fucking ill as fuck
>>
>>580896879
I ate so much wheat.

I didn't ask it anything, I learnt my lesson from the last time I tried that.
>>
>>580896835
Christchurch mate. That must be some sweet ACC payments to be fair.

You got folks to run errands for you and shit?
>>
Have my babies IDbro!!!
>>
>>580896827
Keep it close, hold on to it tight. Most people tend to lose theirs and once its lost you can never get it back.
>>
>>580897013
Oh nice, what area you posted up in?

Yeah sort of, got all my ducks in a row so don't have much to do so not too bad.
>>
>>580897251
Nice man glad to hear it, couldn't have let a fellow /b/tard be stranded. I'm in Ilam mate.
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