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Hi /b/ I need some advice... in return a little porn dump. I

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

Thread replies: 47
Thread images: 28

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Hi /b/ I need some advice... in return a little porn dump.

I have been a derpression fag for as long as i can remember. I have a way smaller than avarege penis 4 1/2 inch erect, which is why i have never been with a woman (touched or kissed) I am also a UK fag.

Being a UK fag i get free health care (at the point of access).I know that people who are derpressed get plastic surgey covered on the NHS because they would be suicide otherwise.

My question is this /b/... How can i mutilate my genetalia so that they will give me free surgery to fix and enhance it.

Have any b tards done this before (in uk) what was the results.

How can i disfigure myself but sitll have a working, and not too disfigured looking junk.

also how many inches will they add? i feel that a penis of 7-8inches is the minimum required to satisfy a woman(from what i have read) will they give me the full 7-8inches when i go to accident and emergency.

Any adivce on how to painlessly dissfifugre would appreciated. as allways tits untill b delivars.

Thank you anons.
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bump
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self bump
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does anyone have any experience of this?
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the thing you should be doing is being happy with yourself, a small dick isn't the worst thing in the world. get rich = bitches
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I will keep going
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>>576972436
small dick means nothing.
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>>576972436
You can get free therapy on the NHS, and anti-depressants. I suggest looking into that rather than mutilating genitals.
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>>576972674
Sorry... did i say lets all have a thread where we makeeach other feel better about ourselve.... PROTIP...no i did not.

Either help me by answering a question that i asked or get out of my thread.

Does anyone else have any tips?
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>>576972436
Also, it's not 'free.' It's paid for by taxes.
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>>576972781
Once again, either answer questions asked or kindlyleave... your kind aint wanted round these parts partner.

>>576972891
DEar fucking christ i come to fucking /b/ on the internet to get this shit sorted any you dont even answer my question.

lets get some SUGGESTIONS ON THE GO GUYS.

Ill give you a clue. its were you privde USEFULL INFORMATION. none of this pussyfooting around.
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Ok then Op you faggot. You have a small dick and i do not, so i could not give a fuck about yoour weak ass bitching. how about you man the fuck up you stupid retard. Fucking british scum you might as well just kill yourself no chick will ever stay with a pin dicked faggot like yourself.
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>>576972981
I dont pay taxes, i am unemployed so it is free.

Any hlep guiys?
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>>576973050
If that's you're attitude then you can fuck off.

Get a paid of scissors and go mad, I expect the hospital will reconstruct it even smaller.
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>>576973092
Sir... I understand, this is why i want a l;arger penis becuase it gets the women and it gioves me confidence to be the man i want to be. you are AGREEING ith everything i am saying you just dont know it.

PLease help me to answer the questions that i have asked.

can anoyone give adivce, i kno i i am not the only brittish fag to think of this plan. someone must have done it before.
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Scumbag Op has small cock, is apparently depressed, comes on internet wants people to give him advice for a retarded idea, gets upset when people tell him not to do it. I think you should just kill yourself you sis scum.
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>>576973050
>wants to mutilate dick to get bigger dick
>thinks its better than taking anti-depressants or stop worrying about dicks.

Sorry, as much as would love some genital multilation, you wimp couldnt do it anyway.

Thats the best help you are getting.
>>
Op don't hurt your self, do drugs to feel better.

Sex will not feel good ever again. Thexe simply isnot enough science to get the nerves connected back together.
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I am 100% sure if you did this they would only reconstruct they wont enhance. So go for gold and let us know how it works out.
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>>576973185
Thank you for a real suggestion finally.

yes i think that a pair of scissors is an option but further questions arrise.
1) do you think that i should cut in a way that makes it look like fell on them(the old accident routine)
2) do you think that cutting the shaft or the balls would encourgae the docitrs to make it a normall size in surgery? (which will illicit more sympathy?)
3) Do you think my attitutdde is that bad? i am only reply to the stupid asss comement made so far.
thanks again for a seriouse reply
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>>576972915
fuck off stupid nigger. do us all a favor and just kill yourself.
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>>576973367
Not an answer to my question so iw ill choose now to activly ignore you

>>576973394
GET OUT OF MY THREAD THEN!!!!!!!!

>>576973508
>>576973508
i DONT WANT TO FUCKING CUT THE THING OFF dick weed i only want to make it injured so they have to do reconstructed surgery, then when i am in they will see that it is too small and make it the normall size for its job(satisfying omen and my ego) GIVE ME AIDVE OR GET OUT OF MY THREAD.


>>576973525
not what i ASKED BUT i will humor you...

THey will make it bigger becuase 7-8 inches is the min...MINIUM!!!! THAT IS NEED FOR NORAMLLSEX ANY LESS AND THEY HAVE TO FIX IT ON THE NHS BUDGET.
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>>576973747
NO YOU GET OUT OF MY THREAD YOU NIGGER HATER.

does anyone think that it might be an idea to remove one ball,so that the other fuction and then they will just put a silcone bag in there and no will know it was injured/
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>>576973935
Is that it then?is this thread dead, only because i want adive?

will keep posting
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Your a retard if you think a reconstruction means they will make it the average size, they only work with what they have if anything they will patch you up and you will live the rest of your pathetic life deformed. Remember even thought your healthcare is free doesn't mean they will spend any more time on you to extend your dick cuz you fucked it up.
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>>576974037
>>
cut your dick off then drink a bottle of bleach. should make it grow back 3 times the original size.
>>
Most likely you will end up with some inexperienced surgeon who decides it's easier to just cut off the damage and seal up the wound.

You will probably left with little to no feeling and be forced to use a cadathaDer resulting in no sex and a shameful life
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>>576974038
OK Lets go over the facts again.

1)the NHS IS PUBLICLY FUNDED
2)I PAY MY TAXES FOR IT
3)i HAVE A PENIS WHICH MAKE ME DEPRESSED
4)I HAVE A PENIS WHICH DOESNT WORK IT IS SOOOOO SMALL
5) THEY WILL FIX THE DEFORMATION( EVERYONE AGGRESS ON THAT)
6) IF THE SIZE IS WHAT WAS MAKING ME DEPRESSED THEY WILL FIX THAT TOO.


WHAT DONT YOU GET ABOUT THIS... ITS JUST LOGIC.... FFS


PLEZASE CAN SOMEONE HELP ME
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>>576973817
You're going into a community of proven assholes and introverts asking for advice on how to mutilate your own dick in order to commit insurance fraud and you're getting so pissed off you keep breaking rule 40.
>pic related
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>>576974091
Ha ha nice try... i have seen those huffing jokes

>>576974169
This is not true,the NHS has some of the best doctors an surgeon in the world. far better tha in europe and america.

in response to you arguement that the doctor will not i refer you to the point i made about. the post with the ladys onderfull buttocksriding a NORMALL sized dick.
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>>576974085
This is my last post.

If still want your stupid idea, the best place to cut is under the penis.
In the middle of the penis, under it.
use scisors or a pointy knife.
Make one big stab while erect.

However, of course if there is absolutely no other way.

If that really is the only way in the world to make you happy. otherwise, move on and i can get you deprression advice.
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>>576974327
O.K M80
1) I am asking for advice fromthe only place i will get it(i.e someone on here must have done this before)
) IT IS NOT FUCKING INSURANCE FRUAD HOW MANY TIME DO I NEED TO SAY I AM UK. WE HAVE NHS IT IS BEST IN WORLD.

3) i break no rules.
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>>576974037

Nobody gives a fucking about your pathetic little problems, and nobody wants another leecher faggot like you putting more strain on an already strained system.

People like you are why the postcode lottery exists. Fucking kill yourself and good riddance.
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>>576974776
thanks for the adivcce, i am genuiunly gratefull.

do you think i have to worry about blood loos with an erectioon or will it clott.

how deep should the knife go.

is it benificial to make it look like an accident,

do you have personal experience doing this on yourself or others, doyou tihnk it it worked?
did they increase the girth or only the size of your penis when you went in.
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>>576974776
That faggot wants to kill you. That cut will make you bleed to death.
I suppose hes telling you kill yourself?
>>576975071
>someone on here must have done this before
no we havent.
>>
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
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>>576975250
I am citezen anyt many of my grandparent faught for my rights.... sooooooooo... guerss what.... i am going to stay right here.
ASnd there is nothign you can do about it.

the NHS is not strained. it just needs people to pay more for it. a small increase in taxes is worth it for the range of seriveces they provide for free.
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>>576975373
O.K SMAERRT ASS
OHHH LOOKY e have a comment critic in our midst. what an honor...not
please give adivce that i ask for OR... YOU GUESED IT

GET THE FUCK OUT OF MMMMMYYYYY THREAD.

also he is the only person to give realadivce sofar. so please let him be. dicl.
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>>576975658
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>>576975709
get tae fuck
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>>576975298
>do you think i have to worry about blood loos with an erectioon or will it clott.
When the penis is damaged, there is a natural response to make it shrink.
>how deep should the knife go.
about 1/4 of the diameter.
>is it benificial to make it look like an accident,
Not at all. You will need people to know you did this to yourself to get enlargement surgery.
>do you have personal experience doing this on yourself or others, doyou tihnk it it worked?
I used to make genital multilations a lot a coulpe of years ago. Never in mine. But i did managed to understand how dicks work.
>did they increase the girth or only the size of your penis when you went in.
Penis enlargement surgery is diferent procedure.
It should be reconstruction + enlargement. To get enlargement, you should prove depression.
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>>576975823
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>>576975871
Does OP even know how dicks work?
That cut will make him never pee again.
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>>576975871
THANK YOU THANK THANK YOU.

I really appreciate your contributions and taking the time to give such detailed answers.

so are you saying that within reason it is not possible to cause permentant damage to the penis?

I guess that is true. and the people that you helped got the surgy? or only reconstrution?

you have given me the confidence to become the man i know i should be. thank you sir... king.

can i repay you smehow?
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>>576976051
take lessons and respiond with life afirming confidence boosting post s like the gent above you massive downer dilweed.
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>>576976106.
>so are you saying that within reason it is not possible to cause permentant damage to the penis?
There will be a big scar and loss of sesitivy in the damaged area.
>I guess that is true. and the people that you helped got the surgy? or only reconstrution?
Most of them did
>you have given me the confidence to become the man i know i should be. thank you sir... king.
you are welcome.
>can i repay you smehow?
There is deep web site called Penis Panic, dedicated to images of genital mutilation.

...

Now this has gone too far. All i wrote above was made up.
You really shouldnt multilate your dick. I am in no way a dick expert and Heaven was probabibly right.

Find a NHS psychologist. See ya ^^
Thread posts: 47
Thread images: 28


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