THE ADVENTURE NIGGINS...
>You are a young man of African-American descent. Raised by your grandmother in an inner-city housing project, you have your whole life ahead of you.
>At first glance, today is a day like any other, but below the current of routine you feel a strange urgency. It's as if destiny is tugging on the very fabric of your soul. A great purpose awaits you, a perilous journey on the horizon.
>Your Nigger Quest begins now..
Mattress springs creak beneath you and rays of sun shine through your blinds. Your post-sleep tranquility is shattered by rapid pounding on the door.
"Wake the fuck up, nigga!"
Aww sheeit, you knew you had to be somewhere this morning but where?
>[work] your manager is going to have your ass if you're late again.
>[school] you're gonna get that GED if it takes a decade.
>[liquor store] it seems like a fine day for a 40 oz of malt liquor.
>[write in] whatever you want.
>>the option with the most votes gets it. Let's go, niggers.
bump, stay alive, nigger quest! And im gonna now my damn lawn
Aw fuck, it's Thursday isn't it? That means another day at PS 169. You roll out of bed and grab your backpack, pulling it on as you make your way down the hall and into the front room. Your granny spots you and waves you over.
"Ja- Ty- sheeit, too many damn kids in this house. Which one are you, nigga?"
>[what's your name, nigger?]
"Gramma you know I'm Tyrone, c'mon now"
Granny throws up her hands and sighs.
"I don't give a fuck, little nigga. You goin to school?"
"Yea I got my bookbag, don't I?"
She raises an eyebrow,
"Nigga you got an hour still, go down to the corner store for me"
>write in how Tyrone will respond
What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.
Dude are you for fucking real right now? You have got to be kidding me you fucking faggy piece of shit. I bet 1000 dollars you are a fucking liar. You fuckin guido tool douchebag.
1. You are too young and shitty to even graduate from school
2. In case you did. How many blowjobs did you give to graduate?
3. Secret raids on Al-Quaeda? I bet you only sucked Osama's dick
4. 300 confirmed kills? I think you meant 300 confirmed anal sex with men
5. It's Guerrilla warfare, you fucking ass douchebag cunt
6. You think your cool for getting trolled for reading this?
7. I don't give a fuck if you come to my house with your spy bitches, I will beat the fuck out of you
8. Only with your bare hands? I bet you can only do handjobs, fag
9. The entire arsenal? you are a fucking faggot lier
10. If your SO badass, than why are you on /b/?
11. You better watch yourself because I will fucking hunt you down myself.
"Granny what the fuck you need fo yo old bitch ass?"
You put down your backpack and take a step towards her.
"Gimme a pack of Newports, a five-dollar bingo, and a pint of gin"
"Granny you never win those scratch-offs, what the fuck"
She hands you a twenty dollar bill.
"It's my money, nigga now go on, git"
Fucking granny. You head out the door, down the hall and into the elevator. The old stained doors close behind you and the car descends. As you make your way out of the lobby you gulp. The corner store is right across the street but getting there won't be so easy because there in the courtyard is that big nigger Jamal.
>What does that big nigger Jamal want from us?
>[granny's twenty bucks]
>[our help with something]
>[to beat our ass]
>[as always, write in]
Your eyes turn slightly red as your body has been prepared for this.
you feel your muscles surge with an unearthly gorilla strength, you then lick your massive nigger lips together with the suction of a black hole. then instantly and violently you rip your lips apart and cause a massive super sonic boom to rip through your block, breaking all of the windows In a 20 mile radius, you then propel yourself with the force of 1000 gorillas and pound jamal into the ground with the force of a quasar crashing into him at 1400000000000000 times the speed of light
Jamal needs our help on getting the negress Ra'aquisha big cellulite ass
"Yo daw I'm finna get muh dick wet know what I'm saying. Help me go to those bitch ass Chinese coena' stoe and get us some 40's "
That big nigger Jamal's an alright dude, just sometimes he gets these fucking ideas, man. As soon as he sees you, Jamal runs up to you. The two of you perform a complex handshake and exchange pleasantries.
Jamal's looking pretty excited, you know from experience that this means he's got some potential fresh pussy on tap. He follows you to the corner store while telling you about these fly ass hunnies.
You ask the sandnigger behind the counter to get you the cigarettes, gin, and lottery ticket. Jamal, in an act of reflex, starts scratching off the ticket.
You snatch it up from him and scowl.
"Nigga that's for my granny she gon be pissed"
That's when your eyes fall to the ticket.
Two watermelons are uncovered. No. Fucking. Way. You can't help but slam the ticket onto the counter and take your thumbnail to the third and final spot, scratching furiously. Holy fuck, the coveted third watermelon. You just won ten thousand dollars.
>what is Tyrone gonna do with 10k?
buy a huge crack rock and smoke it all with jamal and some fine young white pussy. After raping the white girls he kills them and dumps their bodies off in fron of the school.
Okay we got some good ideas here. Definitely have to get granny another scratch-off.
Gonna start the vote now, reply to this post for your vote to count. Answer y/n for each.
>rob store [y/n]
>new threads [y/n]
>white girl [y/n]
Voting ends in 5 minutes.
They can't help the urge to still rob the store and take some 40'z too
They need fly clothes
And they want white wimminz no more cellulite negress ass they gots money
i guess you don't know them new fangled 38 year old nigga grandmas do you? you know, preggers at 14... then their kid gets preggers at 14... and the cycle continues.
those grammas talk maaaaaaaad shit nigga
yeah pretty much this.
all the baby-boomer black grandparents are too respectful to even look at themselves in a mirror.
but the now aging black grandparents are a different story
he goes to a PS. That's elementary school. He could definitely be 10. Of course by that age, he'd also have aids and be a drug addict, but OP hasn't mentioned anything like that yet.
In the state of ecstasy following your ten thousand dollar windfall, you decide to push your luck even further.
Hopping over the counter, you rabbit-punch the hadji right between the eyes.
Jamal instantly rises to the occasion and pulls his gun out, sweeping the store for possible hostiles. There are none. Your surprise attack knocked the sandnigger out cold. Smiling at your handiwork, you start filling shopping bags with cartons of cigarettes and rolls of scratch-off tickets while Jamal keeps watch at the door.
Before long you've cleaned out the area behind the counter. You turn to the register and hit 'no sale', the drawer pops open.
>4 shopping bags of cigarette cartons
>4 shopping bags of scratch-off tickets
>2 boxes of various hard liquors
>$850 from the register
>1 winning ticket [10k]
>how do we make our escape ? [write in]
Disguise yourself as the Indian. Sprinkle coke on the actual Indian. Give him your knife, say he trie to rob the store. Call the cops. Jamal witnessed the whole thing, was a "customer." Get Indian arrested while still out cold. Don't trust that nigger Jamal with the goods, close up shop before they ID you and get the fuck home, nigga!
Walk out of the store to find officer Barbrady filling up his crown vic. He looks at you with a weird look because you and jamal have bags of smokes in your hands.
Jamal in a panic opens fire on the cop.
Lmao ops picture is my old neighborhood
That deli was infested with niggers.
This is how it looks now.
CLEAN YOUR NOTIFICATIONS YOU FUCKING CASUAL
Ummm... how many lives do we get, OP?
Fuck guys, I've got an unexpected work responsibility to take care of. Looks like I'll have to pause the quest here. I will return about an hour and a half for Nigger Quest Part Two: the Renigging
ill continue this epic quest.
>you ass be robbin da store.
>you and jamal escape to an allyway near your home
>have 10,000 and all the newports and scratch cards you could want
>your move nigger
How niggers do it in fort myers where i live.
You suddenly realize the racial, economic and social pressures your people are born into. You decide to turn your life around, go to college and run for major of your city to improve the lives of the next generation of nigglets. You know thatit will take a couple generations for yur neighborhood to become upper class but you managed to get this far and you won't stop now.
10 years after you discovered the 3rd watermelon by pure luck, you look at your city. You managed to urn your neighborhood into the biggest international centre of commerce. Your people live like kings....you did it nigga....you did it...