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Halp /b/ I think I accidentally a poisonous mushroom into my

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

Thread replies: 123
Thread images: 22

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Halp /b/

I think I accidentally a poisonous mushroom into my small intestine.

Basically I was preparing a delicious soup and thought it would be a good idea to travel out to the yard and pick some fresh mushrooms. you know healthy self sufificent and all that BS. So I threw all those mushrooms in the pan and simmered that soup away, slurped it all down with a loaf of bread and now I'm not feeling so good.

Is this a dangerous mushroom. Can masterminds at /b/ give me some peace of mind?

>inb4 get your stomach pumped
>>
>>563176414
You fucking moron. Who the fuck does that?
>>
>>563176414
Looks deadly to me

>inb4 OP dies
>>
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>>563176414
Nah u good
>>
if you only ate one youll be fine, just get ready for explosive shits and vomitting. drink lots of water and some oj

if it gets real bad go to the hospital or your kidneys could shut down
>>
>>563176414
if you die can you share soup pls?
>>
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>>563176414

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d1biXQp8x7k
>>
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More pics of the offender in question
>>
>>563176624
>phemix

Stephen with a ph, phteven
>>
>>563176414

>I think I accidentally a poisonous mushroom

I'm annoyed nobody has picked up on this.
>>
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Mugshot 2
>>
>>563177006
are u stupid or what
>>
>>563177006
>being this new
>>
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I'm ready for my close up.
Armchair mycologists are welcome to zoom in and enhance.
>>
>>563176414
should have probably looked up how to actually pick edible mushrooms. but that wouldn't be the faggot way to do it
>>
>>563177006
>I think I accidentally an poisonous mushroom

Better?
>>
hey op go pick a few more im sure its just the remedy
>>
>>563177006
go away
>>
>>563176984

RIP OP
>>
>>563176414


Looks fine to me, can we see the cleft?
>>
>>563177516
that ID
>>
>>563177319
i dont got no time for that
i jus needed sustinence
but thanks anyway bro
>>
>>563177516
>urGay
>>
>>563177516


UR GAY!
>>
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>>563177516
mfw that ID
>>
>>563177516
ur gay nice
>>
>>563176414
Did you the hole thing
>>
>>563177516

Holy fucking shit urGay
>>
Guys please.
I'm feeling a tingly sensation in my anus and have an urge to puke a little
(Deadly serious)

what do?
>>
>>563177719
one thing thats funny is that i was at bonaroo and they offered a wild mushroom foraging class.
>>
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>>563177516
>>
OP you are fucking retarded for picking shrooms and eating them out of your garden, there are thousands of types. Besides, you probably won't die. That's just a Portobello.
>>
>>563177719
Oh in that case, here's some bleach miss Todd, it with extra nutritional value
>>
As a rule of thumb gills are always a bad idea. As is the little skirt around the stem.

No idea about this specific mushroom though. Better mosey on down to the hospital OP
>>
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>>563176984

a quick google image search shows that what you actually ate was some sort of chinese mushroom. you'll be fine.
>>
>>563176414
>Peace
>/b/
Pick one.
>>
>>563177985
Go to the hospital you god damn fucking retard.
/b/ doesn't know shit.
>>
>>563177651
>>563177763
>>563177781
>>563177831
>>563177854


Joke's on you, I'm actually gay!
>>
>>563177516


urGay
>>
>>563177516
>urGay
OP is a confirmed faggot
>>
>>563177985
Kiss your ass goodbye, you gassed yourself cause...its a suicide
>>
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>>563177516
urGay
>>
>>563176414
looks fine to me, red and white coluration means poison
>>
>>563178141
>Joke's on you, I'm actually gay!

I remember when I used to connect two independent clauses with a comma.
>>
>>563176414
It's in your head
You'll be okay, just have a hard diarhea
Chill bro
>>
>>563177628
Woah there tiger.
at least take me out for dinner and a glass of wine before we get down to that
>>
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>>563177516
>>
>>563177985
fucking puke, you dumb shit. If you feel sick then be sick - it's your body's natural way of removing poisons/toxins. Also dont eat fucking mushrooms from the backyard, sheesh
>>
>>563178141
UR GAY
>>
>>563176984
Looks like some sort of shaggy cap aminita. Could be poisonous.
>>
Eagle scout here, thats definitely poisonous. Wont do much besides give you diarrhoea, but I'd recommend going to a doctor anyway.
>>
>>563178495
thanks saved
>>
>>563176414
mfw when he prob got them from grocery
>>
>>563177719
This is hands down the funniest thing I've read on /b/ all week.
>>
>>563176414
Bahagahaghagaha

>Sundays
>>
>>563177516

dat nigga gay x 5
>>
>>563177628
I was just playing hard to get.
Here's a view of the shaft.

seriously wut do. Feel a little lightheaded here but nothing major. just like how I feel with my low blood sugar sometimes
>>
>>563178426

>4chan

>caring about grammar

Your autism/ADD is showing.
>>
>>563178426
>I remember when I used to connect two independent clauses with a comma.

I remember when I used to be a grammar Nazi
>>
>>563177516
OP confirmed for absolute faglord
>>
>>563176984
It's a fucking portobello mushroom OP likely bought at the store.. You got trolled
>>
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>>563178859
Oops I am not good with computer forgot to attach pic.
>>
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did someone say

pic related
>>
>>563178859
OP what's your state/country?
>>
>>563177516

best id i've seen
>>
>>563178141
Fucking queer
>>
>>563177985
>hurr durr I'm going to eat some shit I found in my back yard

What did you expect? Go to the hospital you fucking idiot.
>>
>>563179442
I'm in a right state at the moment
Just feel queasy.

I'm located in USA.
>>
>>563178426
That's a perfectly fine way to connect two independent clauses, shithead.
>>
>>563179631
>i am in the right state
uh oh, he is starting to kill
>>
did this chump genuinely just go out and pick another mushroom just to take loads of pictures of it to show us
>>
>>563179554
I don't have the money for the medical insurance bills. I checked online and it said it's pretty unlikely to actually be dangerous. The worst it might do is maybe make me puke.

I just want to know for sure
>>
>>563176414
It's a portobello you damn troll
>>
>>563179631
feeling queasy is easy peasy
just take some water and lemon squeezy


protip add ginger and honey
>>
>>563179896
It's not a fucking portobello unless they grow in rural pennsylvanian woodlands
>>
>>563176414
How stupid can you get OP?
>>
>>563176414
It's a portobello you idiots.. OP is trolling
>>
>>563177516
urgay x5
>>
>>563179938
Thanks buddy I have some ginger and honey but got limes only. figure they'd be good enough.

I've been drinking tonic water since itcontains quinine in it which can help clear the digestive system (idk not 100% sure, just read on yahoo answers)
>>
This must be the same guy who tried to start a thread a couple hours back with a picture of a bag full of mushrooms.
>>
>>563178084
Kekd hard
>>
>>563180262
do u have skype
my dad is a mushroom grower he will kno
>>
I don't think you guys have properly broken down my ID.

It clearly states (urgay)(x5)(b)

I'm gay x5 on /b/.

/thread.
>>
Faking westerners cant even eat a regular mushroom without being sick. It is why you will fall under the mighty Russian boot soon.
>>
>>563180540
>implying russians wear boots
>bears on unicycles
>>
>>563179740

No it's not, shithead. If you want to use a comma, you need a conjunction.
>>
>>563180670
OHHHHHHHHHH russians wear boots and ya gotta believe me!
>>
Halp /b/

I think I accidentally a dirty needle into my bloody veins.

Basically I was preparing a delicious shot and thought it would be a good idea to travel out in the streets and pick some fresh needles. you know healthy self sufificent and all that BS. So I inserted one of them in my thigh and simmered that shit away, slurped it all down with dirt and all, and now I'm not feeling so good.

Is this a dangerous needle. Can masterminds at /b/ give me some peace of mind?

>inb4 get your stomach pumped
>>
>>563180023
They actually do, so whether you picked it or bought it, it's not posoinous, your reaction is psychosomatic or not related to the mushroom itself... As they typically grow in shit.. That might be your problem.
>>
>>563180391
you caught me. I also tried inventing a waterproof sponge back in 2006 but got laughed out of the patent office

>>563178084
I checked whether it was a shitake mushroom already protip: it's not.
>>
>>563176414
You're a fucking moron
Enjoy your mushroom aids, cunt
>>
>>563177516
lel you should feel proud
>>
>>563180454
Yes I do have skype but not sure you will live up to your lofty claims. Care to give any evidence that your dad is actually a mushroom grower?
>>
>>563176414
OP, that looks like an old meadow mushroom. It's the same kind you get in grocery stores.

That thing is probably really bug-eaten, btw. You want them before their gills fan out.
>>
>>563178084
took me a while but i kekked
>>
>>563180958
>thread
>>
>>563180781
I lul'd, awesome Sabbath reference 10/10
>>
>>563180780
Too bad "Joke's on you" isn't an independent clause then, huh? HUH??? Fucking rekt.
>>
>>563181428
Thanks. I stuck it under the faucet and gave it a quick once over, brushed the muddy shit and the creepy crawlies off it and boiled it before it even went in the soup. I heard even if it was dangerous boiling it will remove almost all of the toxins.

I think maybe I'm just imagining this sickness but do seriously feel pretty rough still. Wanting to puke. sort of in that stage where I'm just waiting for it to come out.
>>
>>563178561
this
>>
>>563177516
ur gay five times, /b/
>>
>>563177516
gay tho
>>
>>563179631
>I'm in a right state at the moment
>right state

Oh shit we are losing him
>>
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>>563181019
I knew it.

The only way to know for sure is to eat the rest of the bag faggot.
>>
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>>563177516
>>
>>563179019
Looks like an Agaricus of some sort, should just be temporary stomach pain, maybe diarrhea.
>>
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>>563177516
I swear they add gay to ID on purpose now
>>
>>563182180
I just searched on google for pics of agaricus. It looks almost exactly the same 'yellow stainer' or something.. shit :(
>>
>>563180958
lel
>>
>>563182454
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Agaricus_subrutilescens
>>
>>563182735
Thanks buddy.
>>
>>563183012

>The mushroom fruits in undisturbed mixed woods in Western North America and Japan.
>>
Why the fuck would you eat wild mushrooms without thinking of the consequences in the first place?
>>
>>563180465
10/10 kek'd, screencapping
>>
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False alarm guys, turns out I did pick some mushrooms but I never actually used them, just threw them back in the yard.

I just found a packet where these mushrooms came from next to the trash and remembered they came from walmart. I had a bit too much southern comfort earlier which explains the sickness and the diarrhea well it's always like that tbh.

thankx for all the help anyway though buddies.
>>
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>>563182454
>>
>>563178035
Fuck. Turns out you were right .. -_-
>>
that mushroom looks like the ones that grow in my lawn, im in Minnesota
>>
>>563183734

You are the most retarded person on the internet right now.
>>
>>563183734
you fucker
>>
>>563183734
2 think i wuz gonna ask my dad 4 u...
well don't b shy
u can add me on skype
iamafemanon
>>
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>>563177516
Never forget, urgay
>>
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>>563177516
Too fucking perfect
Thread posts: 123
Thread images: 22


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