Hey /b/, I have a story to shaaare
>Be me, 23, live at home in my dads basement. Have a job just live at home cause lolcheap
>One day notice a spiderweb starting to form in the corner above my desk
>Due to my apathy spiderbro and I develop mutual friendship
>He's right by my window anyways, keeps flies from getting in
>Month pass, fast forward to today
>Get home from work, fucking starving, walk into kitchen and open pantry
>As I open it, get a sharp pain on my arm and instinctively swat at it
>Realize a wasp just stung me
>Little fucker is writhing around on the counter, apparently I hit his wing
>Suddenly every frustration I've had in the past month, every thing that's made me mad, I channel into this asshole
>Decide to destroy his fucking world, really get into his head and make him suffer
>Grab him in a plastic container, proudly stride downstairs while hateglaring the little fucker
>Get up on computer chair, remove lid, and toss him into the web
>He struggles like a bitch but ultimately is unable to escape
Just waitin for spiderbro to come out and destroy this dick. Pretty sure getting paralyzed and eaten alive must be horrible.
It's about the small victories /b/
Anon... You sir, are the man.
post them pics OP
Hard to see with shitty phone camera, but he's up in the corner.
I think spiderbro is out hunting/looking for some booty.
Spiderbro needs to become a meme!
I trapped him under a piece of plastic.
Dumbass wasp never trained for this scenario.
Should I try to find a new spiderweb to dump him in? Im sure there's a bunch outside
you made a promise to us that you'd cum on him. don't let us down, OP.
>destroy wings through plastic
>don't cum on it, spiderbro probably isn't into that
keep in minds that spiders tend to take thins easy. As long as the wasp struggles, he might not attack.
...i don't think you guys get the joke
Alright, I came on a black piece of cardboard I had, then swapped the bottoms from paper to cardboard.
He started spazzing out like he was drowning. He is completely covered in my jizz.
Dude, wasps eat spiders.
I hate to be the barer of bad news, but if there's a chance this wasp was in your house he may have already killed your spiderbro. Ausfag here so I'm not sure about the behaviour of yellowjackets, but generally wasps eat/kill spiders and lay eggs in their bodies to hatch young.
You should probably just burn your house down.
but seriously spray that cunt with bug repellent, not kill spray just like aeroguard or whatever shit you've got. The repellent will basically overload its sensory olfactory like it's be burned. Seriously ive had wasps rip their own legs off when i spray them.
Then burn the cunt.
I dumped him, still covered in my cum, into a web outside.
Well fuck, I didn't know any of that. I don't think he'll put up a fight while covered in my baby juice and wrapped in a web though.
They may kill them, but not today, not now. For this one moment in the universe, everything is right and justice is served
This has got to be some of the best of 4chan i've witnessed live. Being ausfag sucks, we miss all this great shit.
Ok, here we go. I pulled him gently out of the web with a pair of needle nose pliers. He was squirming the whole time.
Fire, for referance, a couple of seconds before being applied. It's important to note, at this moment he was really going nuts trying to get his wings to work. but there was still some web on it.
Finally I applied the fire. In these last moments, I'd like to think the little fuckers stinger burned off. The sting on my arm is only a little red dot now, but god dammit it hurt
And lastly I crushed him in the pliers. Maybe it's just my mind, but I'd like to think I saw more than a twitch in that last second before applying pressure. I didn't flame him very long, its possible he was still alive at this point.
I can totally sympathize with this.
For me, it's european hornets. It's like they have had my scent bred into them from the start of creation. If there are any in the local area they will seek me out. The 1st time I was stung they thought I was having an allergic reaction (im not allergic) and almost took me to the hospital. The damn things have so much poison in them. Plus they sound mean. Not like normal bee or wasp buzzing, but fucking mean low resonance bass sound. I swear to god you can actually feel their wings chopping the air.
If one comes anywhere near me I totally engage flight mode automatically.
And lastlym his crumpled, burned, cum covered (probably burned off) body. Thanks for stickin with me /b/ros. Whatever happened to the spiderbro that used to live in that web, I'd like to think I made him proud. Also, fuck wasps.
I found a really small spider in my bathroom, but its just a tiny guy that couldnt have spun that web.
Idk what happened to the actual spider but he'll live on through his web.
He still might just have gone out for booty. Im pretty sure spiders leave thier webs for that. Who knows though. At any rate Im not gonna check every nook and cranny of my house. As far as I'm concered, justice has been done.
OP you magnificent, glorious, godly, motherfucker! This has been the fucking highlight of my week! You sir, are a master, and (in the least fag way this could possibly be said) I would totally have your ass babies!