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Hey /b/, I have a story to shaaare
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You are currently reading a thread in /b/ - Random

Thread replies: 154
Thread images: 34
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Hey /b/, I have a story to shaaare
>Be me, 23, live at home in my dads basement. Have a job just live at home cause lolcheap
>One day notice a spiderweb starting to form in the corner above my desk
>Due to my apathy spiderbro and I develop mutual friendship
>He's right by my window anyways, keeps flies from getting in
>Month pass, fast forward to today
>Get home from work, fucking starving, walk into kitchen and open pantry
>As I open it, get a sharp pain on my arm and instinctively swat at it
>Realize a wasp just stung me
>Little fucker is writhing around on the counter, apparently I hit his wing
>Suddenly every frustration I've had in the past month, every thing that's made me mad, I channel into this asshole
>Decide to destroy his fucking world, really get into his head and make him suffer
>Grab him in a plastic container, proudly stride downstairs while hateglaring the little fucker
>Get up on computer chair, remove lid, and toss him into the web
>He struggles like a bitch but ultimately is unable to escape
Just waitin for spiderbro to come out and destroy this dick. Pretty sure getting paralyzed and eaten alive must be horrible.

It's about the small victories /b/
>>
>>560938957
pics
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>>560938957
Anon... You sir, are the man.
>>
>>560938957
Good job ! Seriously , fuck wasps
>>
>>560938957

Hey I'd do the same thing if I had a spiderbro
>>
I want pics of spiderbro and the faggot that will be his lunch.
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>>560938957
post them pics OP
>>
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Hard to see with shitty phone camera, but he's up in the corner.

I think spiderbro is out hunting/looking for some booty.
>>
OP... You BETTER be fapping while spiderbro chows down! This is the only way to enjoy a show of such quality!
>>
>>560940132
No, he must be dead. If he built a web that means he doesn't actively go out and hunt.

Your friend is dead.
>>
>>560940132
spiderbro sounds alpha as fuck.
>>
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>>560940132
You are a god amongst men!
>>
This is amazing.
>>
>>560940484
Spiderbro needs to become a meme!
>>
>>560940480
Wait...

I'm actually not sure the last time I saw him.
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>>560940820
this better not be true
>>
Everyone fap and cry in dead spiderbro honor
>>
OP Here. Im going to pull the wasp out of the web and jizz on it, in honor of spiderbro. Ill post pics in a little
>>
;_;
>>
>>560941376
10/10. if spiderbro comes back,make him eat that shit
>>
JESUS FUCK. HE UNTANGLED HIMSELF FROM THE WEB ONCE I PULLED HIM OUT WITH A BUNCH OF IT.

AND HE IS FUCKIN PISSED.

Wat do now
>>
>>560941869
kill him and rape the corpse
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>>560941869
KILL IT WITH FUCKING FIRE OP QUICKLY BEFORE IF GETS YOU
>>
>>560941869
hit him to incapitate its ass, then try to summon the dick mucus as fast as you can
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>>560941869
Be a man! capture him again! Spiderbro is watching here.
>>
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>>560941869
I trapped him under a piece of plastic.
Dumbass wasp never trained for this scenario.
Should I try to find a new spiderweb to dump him in? Im sure there's a bunch outside
>>
>>560942259
cum on him. prep him for spiderbros dinner
>>
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>>560942259
you made a promise to us that you'd cum on him. don't let us down, OP.
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>>560942259
Spiderbro is unique! You need to eat the wasp yourself.
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>>560942259
Wtf! Is that wasp really a hornet?? KILL IT OP KILL IT!!!
>>
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>>560942259
>Women's health associates
>>
cut off its stinger then sting him with it
>>
>>560942346
How do I cum on him without lifting the plastic and letting him escape?
>>
This is the best fucking thread all day!

SPIDERBRO FOR PRESIDENT!!!!
>>
>>560942641
kek
got em
>>
>>56093857
Fucking nice anon
>>
>>560942848
cum in a cup and then make a small hole in the box. make sure he's within reach and throw that shit at him.
Source(s) i'm a pro at this
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>>560942848
cut a little hole in top, cover it until you're ready to blow
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>>560942848
id give him an incapitating hit first then shoot your load. then you dont get a cup full of cum
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>>560943040
sorry wut?
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>>560942848
Some form of sticky liquid poured underneath or put him in a bowl of water, then use something to immobilize him while he cant fly
>>
holy shit op, you've gotta cum on that wasp
>>
I wonder why spider bro didn't destroy that wasps life.
>>
>>560942848
>>560942848 spaz shake the container
>>
>>560940816

>being this new
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>>560943490
Seriously, how newfag is he? I knew that meme before I ever even typed 4chan.org.
>>
>>560943490
come on /b/ro we know you love some nice memes xD
>>
>use needle
>destroy wings through plastic
>don't cum on it, spiderbro probably isn't into that

keep in minds that spiders tend to take thins easy. As long as the wasp struggles, he might not attack.
>>
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>>560943630
it's time to stop posting
>>
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>>560943630
>>560943490

...i don't think you guys get the joke
>>
>>560943617
>Flight mode engaged
kek
>>
Alright, I came on a black piece of cardboard I had, then swapped the bottoms from paper to cardboard.

He started spazzing out like he was drowning. He is completely covered in my jizz.
>>
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>>560942902
FOUR MORE YEARS!
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>>560944048
Fucking sexist pig
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>>560944048
Glorious.
>>
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>>560944048
This is the funniest goddamned thing ever. His wings wont work because theyre so sticky. and he keeps kicking random legs out.
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>>560944048
10/10. now put him back as lunch for spiderbro
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>>560938957
>>560940132
>>560940820
>>560941869

Dude, wasps eat spiders.

I hate to be the barer of bad news, but if there's a chance this wasp was in your house he may have already killed your spiderbro. Ausfag here so I'm not sure about the behaviour of yellowjackets, but generally wasps eat/kill spiders and lay eggs in their bodies to hatch young.

You should probably just burn your house down.
>>
>>560944048
you glorious fucking bastard. you are my new king, OP.
>>
>>560943630
>I knew that meme before I ever even typed 4chan.org
/b/: erasing the fading line that separates joke from stupidity since 2003.
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>>560943490
I just love how mad this got you. Now close the 2 cock garage you call a mouth, and go back to rooting for OP and spiderbro.
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>>560944274
oh shit nigger. waspfag has to pay. burn that mofo
>>
>>560944351

>being this mad
>>
>>560944048
>>
>>560944408
I agree. Burn that motherfucker, or if you want to torture him spray it with bug repellent. It drives them nuts. if you have none use vinegar.
>>
>>560944242
Can you take videos on your phone?
>>
there's always 2-3 faggots in every thread that start arguing for no reason
>>
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spiderbro threads always deliver
>>
holy fuck, somebody archive this shit
>>
>>560945216
theme music= kali 47 by savant
>>
but seriously spray that cunt with bug repellent, not kill spray just like aeroguard or whatever shit you've got. The repellent will basically overload its sensory olfactory like it's be burned. Seriously ive had wasps rip their own legs off when i spray them.
Then burn the cunt.
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>>560944793
I'm not arguing, I just want him to go back to rooting for OP, and spiderbro. This thread is fucking GOLD!
>>
Great bread
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>>560945342
fair enough
>>
>>560945332
no
Gasoline- audioslave
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>>560945216
agreed
>>
>>560945337
this, OP. save as webm
>>
I dumped him, still covered in my cum, into a web outside.

>>560944274
Well fuck, I didn't know any of that. I don't think he'll put up a fight while covered in my baby juice and wrapped in a web though.

They may kill them, but not today, not now. For this one moment in the universe, everything is right and justice is served
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>>560945675
Best OP I've ever seen
>>
http://4archive.org/b/thread/560938957
>>
>>560945675
now, bug spray
>>
>>560945675
You have my respect OP.
But spiders will probably avoid him like the plague.
I vote this
>>560945595
>>
vengeace fro spiderbro now
>>
>>560945675
vengeance for spiderbro!
>>
>>560945675
Why don't you put a needle in the main part of it's body, it doesn't kill them but will sure be unpleasent.
>>
>>560945869
gods work, anon
>>
>>560946006
>>560945595
I have no idea how to make a webm.
My phone can take videos though
>>
>>560946319
there are prolly tuts online
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>>560946438
Ok, gimme a second here to figure it out
>>
Can anyone help OP out on how to make webms?
>>560946319
Do it, take a video of the entire process, we'll figure out the webm bit
>>
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False alarm.
>>
bump for good measure.
>>
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i reward your great works of honor sir.
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>>560946723
>>
>>560946729
>Bumping less than two seconds after the lateset post
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>>560947032
was accident
i sorry
>>
what species of spider is it, OP?
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>>560947026
>>
>>560947184
fallus magnum
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>>560947207
>>
>>560947290
phallus*
>>
Well, I couldnt figure out the wbm thing without a lot of reading, so I just took pics. Gimme a second to upload
>>
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This has got to be some of the best of 4chan i've witnessed live. Being ausfag sucks, we miss all this great shit.
>>
>>560947686
Fair enough OP, you've done brilliantly.
Fuck that waspfag up.
>>
Ok, here we go. I pulled him gently out of the web with a pair of needle nose pliers. He was squirming the whole time.
>>
>>560947949
>Never been clikcing update faster in my life
>>
>>560947949
>
crush it
>>
Fire, for referance, a couple of seconds before being applied. It's important to note, at this moment he was really going nuts trying to get his wings to work. but there was still some web on it.
>>
>>560942848
If you are a smoker blow smoke inside the container.
Like loads of smoke. It should stun that lil birch
>>
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>>
Finally I applied the fire. In these last moments, I'd like to think the little fuckers stinger burned off. The sting on my arm is only a little red dot now, but god dammit it hurt
>>
>>560948128
yeeeeesss, die you yellow jacket cunt DIE

THIS IS FOR SPIDERBRO YOU SHITFUCK OF NATURE
>>
>>560948331
I award OP with 4chan post of the day,
/b/ post of the week,
and 25 internets.
>>
>>560948331
well done OP.
You are a fucking legend.
>>
And lastly I crushed him in the pliers. Maybe it's just my mind, but I'd like to think I saw more than a twitch in that last second before applying pressure. I didn't flame him very long, its possible he was still alive at this point.
>>
>>560948331
saved all 3 pics. now go see if you can find spiderbro somehow, if he survived.
>>
>>560943617
I can totally sympathize with this.

For me, it's european hornets. It's like they have had my scent bred into them from the start of creation. If there are any in the local area they will seek me out. The 1st time I was stung they thought I was having an allergic reaction (im not allergic) and almost took me to the hospital. The damn things have so much poison in them. Plus they sound mean. Not like normal bee or wasp buzzing, but fucking mean low resonance bass sound. I swear to god you can actually feel their wings chopping the air.

If one comes anywhere near me I totally engage flight mode automatically.
>>
And lastlym his crumpled, burned, cum covered (probably burned off) body. Thanks for stickin with me /b/ros. Whatever happened to the spiderbro that used to live in that web, I'd like to think I made him proud. Also, fuck wasps.
>>
>>560948798
OP look for spiderbro before thread is pruned
>>
Any sign of him OP?
>>
>>560948858
>>560949392
I found a really small spider in my bathroom, but its just a tiny guy that couldnt have spun that web.
Idk what happened to the actual spider but he'll live on through his web.
He still might just have gone out for booty. Im pretty sure spiders leave thier webs for that. Who knows though. At any rate Im not gonna check every nook and cranny of my house. As far as I'm concered, justice has been done.
>>
>>560943617 hey that picture you have is the mascot for my elementary school bro
>>
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>>560949853
prolly spiderbros kid. the bloodline goes on.
>>
>>560949853
godspeed OP have a nice night
>>
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>>560949905
>>
>>560949853
long live spiderbro. Thanks for sharing OP, hope you enjoy my crappy fatality post.
Have a good one.
>>
>>560940484
There has been more then one spiderbro
>>
someone screencap
>>
>>560950859
its archived bruh
>>
>>560949853
OP you magnificent, glorious, godly, motherfucker! This has been the fucking highlight of my week! You sir, are a master, and (in the least fag way this could possibly be said) I would totally have your ass babies!
>>
>>560948798
Fucking bro.
>>
>>560949887
It's also my college mascot lol
>>
>>560943714
>obvious b8
>>
SOMEONE SCREENCAP THIS
>>
>>560952037
>>560950997
>>
>>560950997
Plz share your masterpiece
>>
>>560952201
nigger, u dumb or something? there's even a link ITT.
>>
>>560953029
top kek
>>560952201
Also, late-to-the-party-Anon, here: http://4archive.org/b/thread/560938957
>>
>slow
>motherfucking
>clap
i needed this, thanks OP
>>
>>560954229
>responding 35 minutes after the OP last did
>Surprised this thread isn't pruned yet
>>
>>560951362 my school was lookout valley
>>
/b/, full of normal people
>>
>>560954827
awesome*
>>
I fucking hate these insects.

That is all.
>>
This has been the best fucking thread in a long fucking time!
>>
>>560955431
amen
>>
I applaud op
>>
You did good OP. Justice was served. The wasp is now rotting in hell.
>>
>>560954942
Fuck, that wasp is hueg
>>
>>560955672
Today /b/ did NOT suck!
>>
I stubbed my toe.
Thread replies: 154
Thread images: 34
Thread DB ID: 8150



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