Power corruption thread? You can have any one power you desire.

>>560696370
You can only do this when you sneeze.

>>560697558
that's pretty decent actually, I'll have to carry around pepper at all times

Entropy control

>>560697882
for 12 seconds, twice every two days
:^)

>>560697882
Only after you give yourself a vodka-jizz enema

>>560698225
Cool all it takes is an attosecond to cause the heat death of the universe.

Pyromancy
>inb4 out of unfavorable orifice

>>560698626
Only while sucking off black men.

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>>560698496
love the positive thinking

keep it up man

The ability to read peoples minds and know exactly how they feel, and exactly what they mean.

the power to link all people empathetically, so that people can feel what others do

>>560698927
And start uncontrolably shitting your pants as soon as you understand them

>>560698927
But only when giving them a rimjob

Mind reading

>>560699036
tfw no gf

>>560699078
can't turn it off, only works on homosexual nymphos

>>560696370
Immortality.

>>560699060
hell, i'd take it

>>560699408
deaf mute and blind

The power to be the zombies.

Immortality/Regeneration

>>560699408
You have to be a poor black feamle

>>560699408
you body is wasting away over time, painfully rotting and withering, but never to a fatal point. you grow weaker as it progresses

>>560699492
your regeneration spirals out of control like the biological ruin from psyren

Shape shifting

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>>560699475
That's... horrible. How will I even know im alive?
>>560699525
I'll take it
>>560699631
I'll take this one too. I could always an hero, just I won't die from age or disease

The ability to teleport to any place I can think of.

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>>560699672
>>560699492

>>560699672
oh god I looked that shit up; not pleasant

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>>560699862
you can only turn into shapes

>>560699971
cant think of anything other than nigger cock homo orgies

>>560699862
cant become something you have been before, including human

>>560699971
You do not displace the air on arrival.

The power of extreme charisma. I can make anyone like me or anyone love me. I'm extremely well liked no matter how I act.

The power to create/generate, shape and manipulate chemical substances, and manipulate the reactions of said chemical substances.

>>560700534
You'll never love yourself

Matter manipulation (telekinesis, teleportation of myself and objects)

>>560700534

It only works on gay dudes.

>>560700230

Lol

>>560700605
you are not protected from the harm these substances/reactions might cause

>>560700625
Every time you manipulate an object, one of your possessions is destroyed.

Every time you manipulate a person, someone you know is killed.

How about the power to influence anyone or anything.

>>560700853
Can only influence them to avoid you

>>560700853
Only works if you post dick with timestamp

>>560700727
ffs

>>560700853
>LeDouche from Code Gay-Ass
Only works on an individual once

you lose your own free will

The power to have an immediate orgasm without having to masturbate or have sex.

>>560700625

Everything you manipulate starts to look like the guy with the broken jar in his ass the longer you manipulate it

>>560701113
only while on fire

>>560700813
I manipulate the matter to recreate the object or bring the person back to life. An endless cycle until I end up killing my friend Tom the ant and destroy his bread crumb.

>>560696370

but youre a nigger

The power to be an oldfag

>>560701113

You have a permanant STD and having an orgasm burns like shit.

>>560701437
You are an oldfag

trust me on this you don't want to be me

>>560701350
But you have aids.

>>560701437
Nobody will believe you or will hate you for complaining about old /b/

>>560701437
but still cant triforce

>>>>560701437
All oldfags are dead, and you are the last oldfag ever

the power to drastically amplify anyone else's powers

>>560701134
Oh jeez. Can i manipulate it back, or would I just increase the broken ass jar look?

>>560701574
?
??

>>560699483
in the fido world

>>560701676
You pop a minor blood vessel every time

I've been here 10 years.
>I want the power to prove it
>but I can't anyway so I'll suck a dick to pass time


I want to have the power to give and revoke common sense from others on command.

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The ability to watch Cheaters whenever I see a television

The power to replicate every power mentioned in this thread without suffering their consequences, and immunity to any consequences listed for this power.

The ability to shoot lightning from my dick

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>>560700853
only works on people if you look them in the eye

>>560702041
when you're 35 years old you lose it all and go crazy

>>560702115
you must make yourself finish to gay furry porn for it to work

>>560702067
your GF is always on

>>560702072
Thread 404s, no more powers

>>560702115
Only happens when you pee, and it rebounds upon you.

Every.
Fucking.
Time.

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Influence/Mind Control

the power to be a cute girl

>>560702041
Scratch that, you can only give people common sense. You are the world's best superhero.

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>>560702257
Joke's on you, I don't have a girlfriend!

>>560702041
You lose a year of your life whenever you give common sense and gain a year whenever you revoke, but whenever you revoke you also permanently lose some common sense yourself.

Invisibility
Be nice, anon.

>>560702072 gives me immunity to >>560702334, thread lives on.

>>560702364
futa

>>560702225
I'm actually okay with this.

>>560702402
Fuck that.

>>560702490
I'm okay with this too.

>>560702364
but your ugly when your outside

Power to grant others immortality.

>>560702364
Senpai will never even know you exist

>>560702335
and by every fucking time, I mean that it happens every time you pee.

And you're not immune to it. Ever.

>>560702364
>So cute only pedo's are attracted to you.

>>560702519
Whenever you look at someone you turn visible and turn black.

>>560702617
You can never grant it on someone you know personally.

>>560702519
It goes away every time you get a boner.

>>560702617
once granted immortality they are frozen to absolute zero and atomically disintegrated

>>560702617
for every person you grant immortality, a huge blister will grow on the tip of your dick

The ability to manifest superpowers unto myself, masterfully, of my own free will.

>>560702531
>futa
i am more then okay with this

>>560702519
Invisibility only works at night.

The power to sense the presence of others without the need for sight

>>560702519
Never happens when people/cameras/whatever are looking at you, and your clothes don't turn invisible either.

>>560700534
The people you use your powers on have to be at least 80 years old

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The ability to make any desire come true, whether for myself or someone of my choosing.

>>560696370
cannot screw anything up even if you want to

Control of gravity

>>560702992
everytime something good happens to you, something shitty will happen

>>560702952
Only works when twerking

power to remove al racesl but white people from existance

Women think I'm attractive

>>560702992
only works once. extra attempts corrupt and twist the desire

>>560702952
You cannot turn it off, and it has a ten-thousand mile radius. Enjoy sensory overload.

>>560703063
You can only do it with a dick in your ass

>>560703063
Only works in outer space.
Naked.

>>560702952
Everytime you use this ability you let out a 10 second long fart, and the really fucking loud and smelly type

>>560702842
I read the post you made earlier before you deleted it, it was absolutely beautiful

>>560702992
But only if that desire is to jump 6" into the air

>>560703135
You are only interested in men

>>560702952
Only works in space

>>560703135
you find all women repulsive

>>560703075
So basically everytime I get something good, something bad happens in a different situation, or something like out of The Monkey's Paw?

>>560703098
but you become black

The ability to go in any dream and alter them at will.

>>560703235
jokes on you, space is all encompassing. we are all currently in space. everything is in space

Re?lity m?nipul?tion.

>>560703390
Time manipulation

>>560703310
i will gladly wipe myself from existance for this

>>560703390
at random

>>560702747
That's exactly what I would do. I don't want anyone I know personally to have to live forever.

>>560702842
That's not disadvantageous either. It would mean that they would assume a new form millions of years later.

>>560702892
If these blisters heal over a reasonable amount of time, then I'd still be fine with it.

>>560703390
You do not remember the manipulation you do.

>>560703186
it's from words of radiance by brandon sanderson

"Two blind men waited at the end of an era, contemplating beauty. They sat atop the world's highest cliff, overlooking the land and seeing nothing."
'Can beauty be taken from a man?' the first asked the second.
'It was taken from me,' the second replied. 'For I cannot remember it.' This man was blinded in a childhood accident. 'I pray to the God Beyond each night to restore my sight, so that I may find beauty again.'
'is beauty something one must see, then?' the first asked
'of course. that is its nature. how can you appreciate a work of art without seeing it?'
'i can hear a work of music,' the first said
'very well, you can hear some kinds of beauty but you cannot know full beauty without sight, you can know only a small portion of beauty.'
'a sculpture' the first said. 'can i not feel it's curves and slopes, the touch of the chisel that transformed common rock into uncommon wonder?'
'i suppose,' said the second, 'that you can know the beauty of a sculpture.'
'and what of the beauty of food? is it not a work of art when a chef crafts a masterpiece to delight the tastes?'
'i suppose,' said the second, 'that you can know the beauty of a chef's art'
'and what of the beauty of a woman,' the first said 'can i not know her beauty in the softness of her caress, the kindness of her voice, the keenness of her mind as she reads philosophy to me? Can i not know this beauty? Can i not know most kinds of beauty, even without my eyes?'
' very well,' said the second. 'but what if your ears were removed, your hearing taken away? your tongue taken out, your mouth forced shut, your sense of smell destroyed? what if your skin were burned so that you could no longer feel? What if all that remained to you was pain? You could not know beauty then. It CAN be taken from a man.'
....
'Then beauty, to that person, would be the times when the pain lessens...'

>>560703325
Freddy Krueger doesn't like you trespassing on his turf...

...and comes to kill you the next time you fall asleep.

straight mind domination jedi mind tricks style

the power to be turned into a boulder and never turn back

get any woman to fuck me whenever i tell her to

The ability to turn gold into any less vauable metal.

>>560703591
only works on people who would listen to you without the power

Omnipotence.

>>560703495
wow you must really fucking hate someone

>>560703649
cant repeat, she is aware you forced her to do this

>>560703649
but no sensation from any of them

>>560703591
Doesn't work on jews, jewy people, or /pol/acks.

>>560703658
You are jewish

>>560703649
you still get charged with rape

>>560703591
You suck at it, and you wind up mind tricking yourself without knowing it.

"You want to take off all your clothes and make love to me" results in your arrest for public indecency.

>>560703591
those are the droids you're looking for

>>560703641
you get mined

>>560703649
you cant talk

>>560703761
you cant prove it

>>560703761
but alzheimers

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>>560700612
Dayumson/10

>>560702931
Each superpower you gain shortens your life span by 6 months.

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>>560703532

>>560703472
go back to tumblr

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>>560703649
And fuck you they will, as you can now only orgasm by getting fucked in the ass

>>560703649
Absolutely.

Except it's always you getting pegged up the ass by her forearm, and she never trims her nails.

>>560696370
I can kill any tranny or homosexual/bisexual/

>>560703781
fuck, thats harsh

>>560703532
I should pick it up

>>560703971
>hi-five anon

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>>560703585
you wish freddy can be so cool

>>560703745
well that just kindof makes it pointless, or does extremely little to affect my power, not sure which you mean, but you suck at this

>>560703793
not a fan of shekel crazies or their counterparts, would take

>>560703828
haha would take, make for some great stories..
"so i accidently mugged myself asking this girl out.."

>>560696370
power to do the right thing at the right time

the power of frosted butts

To own the one power to rule them all.

the ability to travel to different dimensions/times throught history
>Dr. who without the tarded

The patience to wait fifteen more minutes until my ban on /a/ is up.

>>560703591
You forget your able to use mind control whenever it could be of use to you

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>>560703796

The ability to override anything

>>560704178
Once a day.

>>560703883
;)

>>560704178
you fuck up at normal life but every once in a while you become a hero

>>560704050

You can only do it after getting gang-raped by twenty donkey-dicked black men infected with every STD known to mankind.

>>560704120
well it's part 2 in a series and both books are over 1000 pages long, so if you do prepare to sit your ass down for a bit

The power to be drunk on a whim whenever I want.

>>560704262
>but /a/ is now a naruto appreciation board

>>560704178
Everytime something goes right, another thing goes wrong
>rekt

>>560704320
Well, shit.

>>560704358
liver and kidney failure

>>560704169
makes it utterly useless. is that not the point of this thread?

the ability to be op and not a faggot

>>560702960
>>560702935
>>560702757
>>560702720

I can live with these.

the power to delete other peoples memories

>>560704510
You can't forget anything.

>>560704510
When you beat the cinnamon challenge.

I am so intellectually advanced, I can deduce any complex equation into a simple yes or no answer.

>>560704510
each memory you delete, you forget one of your own

>>560703764
Nah, it'd be a sick joke that I'd find funny.

>>560704510
lose one of yours every time you do

>>560703532
Wow. What's the book about?

>>560704645
you shoot yourself out of sheer boredom from talking to anyone at all

>>560704645
You are Steven Hawkings

>>560704358
but is pure African War Gin and it's blistering hot

>>560704497
You get fucked up the butthole.

>>560704645
Scientific community laughs at you when you automatically say stupid shit like yes to "2+2=what?"

>>560704645

Paradoxes make your head explode.

Bend all of reality

>>560704645

They're never provable, and you can't show your work. Ever.

>>560704736
Sigh... fuck it all *bang*

>>560696370
The ability to truthfully prove wich god(known or not), if any, is real without a shred of doubt to every single person in the world.

>>560704836
Still can't bend over.

>>560704246
only rules breadcrumbs

the power to not have a downside to my power

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>>560696370
The power of the vitiligo cannon

>>560696370
I can make a lethal trap out of anything.

>>560704931
No one cares

The ability to create entire universes on a whim and have complete control over them.

>>560704945
no power=no downside

enjoy

>>560704836
Reality rebounds and smacks you in the face like a shitty rubber band when you're done bending it.

>>560704945
No power

>>560702115
starts at the base of your dick and travels through your urethra causing immense pain

the power to turn kyle into a chicken

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>>560704750
>implying OP don't get fucked in the asshole already

>>560704836
since all of reality is bent and you are a part of reality, no one experiences anything.

>>560704998
All women you meet are traps.

>>560705042
All universes are populated with nothing but niggers

>>560704981
only takes the thug side of niggardry ie no athletic ability but all the stupid and violent you want

>>560705042
a schizo who can't control himself

>>560705042
Every world you make is populated by millions of oprah clones.

>>560705042
>>560705042
You lose your Sims 3 license every year.

The ability to kill off an entire race

>>560705042
You can only make a universe where the most intelligent life forms are niggers.

>>560705261
In your imagination.

>>560700230
>can't become something you have been before
I'd be okay with this, mostly because I could just shapeshift into something that looks convincingly human but isn't. With an exterior of pure chitin! ... So you know, like a juggalo or black people.

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Shapeshifting.

>>560704998
but you also accdentally make lethal traps out of things, and then dont remember doing it.

>>560705042
in creating an entire universe you destroy this one completely, and since oyu live in this one you die right away.

The ability to see the good in everything, and be happy no matter what

Airbending/ air manipulation

The power to pause/play time, without aging when i pause

>>560705150
This Chicken Steals everything you've ever loved then takes away your power to kill yourself when you have lost will to live.

control every electronic device with my mind

Super Strength

TELEPORTATION!

>>560705398
into water

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Being able to morph myself to look like anyone or any animal I want

>>560705398
Into an old lady stripper exclusively.

>>560705486
to one spot, similar to messenger birds

>>560705398
you can only shift into simple geometric shapes.

>>560705398
but only in dildo form
>horse dildo
>dragon didlo

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>>560705236
So basically I can purify the world and become the hero everyone has always wanted, by becoming the one true super giga-nigga.
I see no downside, I just stopped all of crime, and all I have to do is get shot by the police to purify myself.

>>560705486
Only from bathroom to bathroom

>>560705481
you dick turns small, this already exists.>>560705486
after 1 minute in the place you teleported you come back into your mom's closet.

>>560705436
Deathly afraid of water

I have the power to teleport anywhere in the world

>>560705406
When you drink bleach.

>>560704708
it's a fantasy series about fighting war while a superpowered regicidal maniac is on the loose from the perspective of a prince, a slave, and a scholar.

>>560705691
you're black

>>560705436
Can only do this while picturing your mother and grandmother 69ing

A few days after dying I'm reincarnated into a random organism with all my memories.

>>560705545
You take on their memories and in the case of animals, lose your humanity altogether wich keeps you from ever realizing you have this power.

>>560705691
Somehow always teleport onto the closest niggers dick to your destination

>>560705486
you dont know where to though

The power to change people's perception of color. (One persons green is another person's blue, etc)

>>560705794
You turn colorblind.

the ability to understand any language, written or spoken.

>>560696370
the power to convince anyone of anything

>>560705762
This organism is on another planet with no other forms of life.

>>560705042
the universe you create cancerous and will ultimately destroy itself

>>560704931
You're labeled crazy

>>560705762
You have to die getting raped.

>>560705762
you can only live one day in each organism

>>560705545
But you can only morth into naked oprah winfery or a fucked up dog.
Power to grow my toenails

>>560705762
once

>>560705975
except english

The ability to completely control your biology, and add-subtract mass at will without suffering damage to your structural/homeostatic integrity.

>>560700139
Fuckin' lold

The ability to make one have taste buds in their asshole

>>560705976
They believe you, but automatically take it in the wrong way, and refuse to talk to you ever again.

>>560706051
your penis falls off

>>560706024
you don't have any fingernails

Immunity to STD's.

>>560696370
Can rape people through their auditory senses.

>>560706194
Only while playing the trombone.

>>560705710
I create a device which constantly drips microscopic amounts of bleach into my stomach, not enough to cause any toxic effects, but enough to activate my power constantly, because technically still drinking bleach.

>>560705975
But you can only pick one language and everyone forgets it and you forget everyother language you knew and can not learn again.

>>560706194
you have to wear a condom 24/7

truly absolute omniscience... totally useless, I know.

>>560706194
no sexual organs

>>560706194
You have no immune system.

The ability to punch god in the face.

>>560706194
You're a carrier of all of them, and give anyone you fuck every stdC

>>560706194
No longer enjoy having sex

>>560706245
You get prosecuted for it.

>>560706397
he punches you back

>>560706296
you have to drink a gallon of bleach to be able to invent the device

>>560706397
youre an atheist

>>560706297
what do you not understand about any

I can drink any liquid and piss out single malt whisky.

>>560706397
banned to hell for eternity

Lets get back to basics here people.

Invisiblility

>>560706504
Cool, I do it in the hospital and get my stomach pumped straight away.

power to become invisible, make myself different levels of invisibility, and go back to visible as many times as I want

>>560706529
Feels like lava when you pee

>>560706602
can't be visible ever

>>560706529
you get alcohol poisoning and it burns when you pee

>>560696370
Ability to wipe out religion completely.

>>560706602
you have to be seen by people while taking off your clothes for it to work

>>560706529
You Drink this whiskey all the time, and do nothing but beat all of the people important to you.

>>560706602
you become the worlds most beautiful poet but no one will ever know who you are as you are invisible

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>>560706468
:^)

>>560706648
you become a faggot

>>560706648
But you are blind while invisible.

You know, because light can not hit your corneas and go thought them at the same time.

>>560702339
people you influence also have the same degree of influence over you

flight

the ability to stop time and physically alter the position of things

>>560706820
I'm already a faggot

>>560706682
You become god. With no one to worship you now.

>>560706842
you can only fly with an angry muslim on your back

>>560706648
but your genitals decompose further with each use

>>560706842
A maximum of 2 cm off the ground

>>560706869
Every time you do you become increasingly deformed

>>560706869
you grow older twice as fast

>>560706682

>for every religion wiped, a nigger with a 9 inch dick fucks and cums in your ass

the power to convince anyone that what i say is true

>>560706869
You age 10 times faster than normal when time is still

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The power to be happy all the time.

>>560701179
lel

>>560706153
this

>>560707047
you forget what is true

>>560707047
the person you convinced immediately dies

>>560707090
only when you're by yourself

>>560707090
you will never feel the emotion of sadness and therefore will not know how special happiness is

>>560707130
wow
10/10 deep

>>560696370
The ability to live without respiration.

>>560707047
Whatever you say actually becomes true, be careful what you wish for.

>>560707130
that's some deep shit anon.

>>560700853
You will joke about killing all the japanese.

The power to be content.

>>560707272
Hurts your lungs as if you were suffocating

>>560707272
You become a normal tree.

>>560707389
But only while sucking dick