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>be me
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The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
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You are currently reading a thread in /b/ - Random

Thread replies: 113
Thread images: 38
File: womyn.jpg (108 KB, 1920x1080) Image search: [iqdb] [SauceNao] [Google]
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>be me
>19
>bigendered omnisexual fem-presenting fat-positive catkin
>on my way to work
>decide I want some starbucks
>go inside the shop
>go up to counter, cisgendered scum standing there
>"Good morning ma'am! What can I get you today?"
>ma'am
>I lose it
>drive my mobility scooter behind the counter
>kick him in the balls for raping me like that, in front of everyone
>he doesn't know my gender identity or my special snowflake status
>wheel my scooter around, expecting cheers of adoration and joy from the other rape victims here
>they're looking at me in horror
>wot
>police turn up a few minutes later, I tried to get away but one of my wheels go caught on the door
>arrested for assault
>fucking patriachy are at it again
>six months later
>go to trial
>convicted of minor assault
>sentenced to 200 hours of community service
>more like 200 hours of building the patriachy
>driving to local soup kitchen to serve my rape sentence
>homeless man on the side of the road
>spit on him as I go past, fucking cis scum male privilege
>a nearby womyn sees and comes over
>"I sure did show him, didn't I--"
>"What the fuck?! Did you just spit on this poor man?!"
>wot
>realize this poor female hasn't checked her privilege
>go into panic mode, that's one of my several hundred triggers
>begin to hyperventilate
>"H-he raped me!! He looked at me! I saw it! He raped me! RAAAAAAAAAAAPEEEEEE!"
>"RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPEEEEEE!"
>"RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPEEEEEE!"
>collapse out of mobility scooter onto ground
>curl into foetal position but I'm too healthy and can only move my upper body a few inches
>begin crying into the ashphalt "p-p-patriachy! m-muh patriachy!"
>my perfectly healthy 480 pound body goes into cardiac arrest
>float off into heaven, finally I'll get to be with Marilyn Monroe!
>go to hell
>burn forever
>>
10/10
>>
10/10, would read again
>>
>>558056137

From which tumblr did you steal this? Will follow, 10/10.
>>
cont.
>>
>>558056137
Thank you for making my morning, special snowflake.
>>
well done op
>>
Yeah, pretty good.
>>
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Nice job OP, you weren't as big a faggot as normal.
>>
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>>558056137
>>
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Topkek
>>
*Slowly claps* Well OP Looks like you're not a faggot, This time.
>>
>>558056137
top kek m8
>>
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you had me at "drive my mobility scooter behind the counter"
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?annotation_id=annotation_1564058407&feature=iv&src_vid=BuFuyp8aq2A&v=Sx7PIIA60XQ
>>
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>>558056137
made my day OP
>>
i pressed air through my nostrils while reading this
>kek
>>
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Lol'd
>>
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OH2cceoyIMg
>>
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goddamn good read sir
>>
OP actually made me kek today

>muh sides
>>
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>>
>>
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Fat positive catkin

Mfw
>>
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Best
>>
>>558058919
>>558056137
thank you, both of you
>>
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>>558057994
am i the only one to notice the faggot in the fedore is in like every feminists protest? the asian one with glasses. I mean come on who the hell is that guy?
>>
>>558059509
Don't all asians look the same? maybe you're just confusing him with other fedora wearing asians.
>>
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Capped. Save and post in 4chan gold threads, all ye heathens.
>>
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>>558060041
Muh screen size
>>
>>558056137
Muh sojinys!
>>
>>558060326
You on a tablet computer or something? That's a weird resolution.
>>
>>558056137
damn op i just spent 3 hours watching internet aristocrat. amazing timing
>>
>>558060497
No i cropped it and made it like that, but i had to make 1 and 1/4 screenshots to make it
>>
I r8 that 8/8. would masterb8 to OP
>>
>>558056137
Did laugh
>>
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Bravo
>>
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>>558056137
awesome bread OP
>>
>>558060547
I love his stuff, I could watch it all day.
>>
>word of day WUF -white ugly fat
>>
>>558056137
i am tuypo1 and i approve of this story
>>
>>558058761
im necroabled
>>
>>558058903
wow somebody wrote it up in an image thats great
>>
10/10 would laugh again
>>
Cisgendered scum: http://www.nicovideo.jp/watch/sm22239389
>>
Femanon here, you reacted appropriately. I'm just here to share my rape experience.

I was walking to work on a Friday morning. It was really nice outside, and I was enjoying myself. I work at a supermarket as a cashier for now. I'm majoring in sociology and the amount of sexism is fucking staggering but that's a whole different story. Anyway, I was walking to my job and I had to stop at an intersection. An overweight man in sandals was waiting next to me, and he decided to say "hi." to me. I'm already not interested in speaking with him because it's obvious he's just talking to me because I'm a woman but I decide to humor him and say "hi" back. He then asked me how my day is going so far. At this point I'm insulted that he really thinks I'm falling for his advances and I'm starting to feel uncomfortable and cornered, I have claustrophobia and panic attacks by the way.

Being a little scared I told him "great." I'm sure he must've noticed how uncomfortable I was at this point, but then he had the fucking nerve to tell me what a beautiful morning it is. Oh my fucking god, anyone with eyes can see what a beautiful morning it is, why does he think he had to point that out to me? Does he think women are blind or does he just think his observational skills are superior to mine? The amount of misogyny at this point was becoming overwhelming. Trying to play it cool so he doesn't become violent I simply said "yeah, it is." Finally we're allowed to cross the street and I'm just happy to get out of that dangerous situation... but then, fucking then, he walked next to me and started talking to me for the rest of the block. I was terrified, I thought about calling the cops because I'm sure he would've pushed me into an alley and assaulted me right there if he had the chance. Luckily I was smart enough to enter a different store and I told him I had to get going. I might not have been penetrated but the discomfort I had to experience was without doubt paramount to rape.
>>
>>558056137
10/10
>>
>>558056137
>my perfectly healthy 480 pound body goes into cardiac arrest

Some how this got me the most. Fucking fat pride fatties.
>>
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Good job OP
>>
>i kek'd
Thanks for the screencaps /b/rothers
>>
>>558056137
that was a satisfying read
>>
>>558058417
HOW THE FUCK IS BIG RED EVERYWHERE
>>
>>558059415
This made my day
>>
>>558059415
i want to make sketches based solely around these silly tales
>>
>>558056137
10/10 good job
>>
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Infinity/Infinity

Would laugh until I vomit... again.
>>
>>558056137

>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F23cn4zjZn0

Related.
>>
>>558056137
fake and gay!
>>
Does anyone else think these dumb feminist trigger bitches actually have a deep desire to be raped, and this is how they show it on the surface?

Like they really want to be dominated and raped, but don't know how to handle that feel.
>>
>>558066437

Kind of like how closeted homosexual men are scarily homophobic in their words and attitudes?

I think you have a point.
>>
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>>558056137
genius
>>
>>558058417
Actually agree with her here. Props and logical.
>>
>>558066530
Exactly

It's like they unconsciously crying out to be man handled and fucked
>>
yah feckin funny cunt
>>
>>558066198
stupid fucking slut, made me so happy seeing her getting arrested
>>
>>558067576

Remembering her stupid MUHFEMINISM facial expression as she was surrounded by the cops will give me free erections for the next month.
>>
>>558063971
m8/8
>>
>>558056137
>snowflake
lost it
>>
>>558067853
check your privileges
>>
>>558063971
This is a prime example of paranoia people!
>>
>>558058761
biphallic master race reportinng in, you jelly of my 2 dongs?
>>
>>558069140
pics or gtfo
>>
>>558057994
"[...]a part of patriarchy" [citation needed]
>>
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>>558069262
sure
>>
>>558069756
>>
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>>558069756
>>
>>558070052
dont be judging, anon

im a man with 2 penises inside
>>
>>558070202

You sound very accommodating.
>>
>>558070342
hue
>>
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>>558070202
>>
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>>558056137
would read again
>>
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>>558056137
HAHAHAHA. fantastic.
>>
>>558058761
im an anist
>>
>finally I'll get to be with Marilyn Monroe!

I lost.

>mfw Marilyn was not fat like all these stupid bitches like to pretend
>>
>>558056137
>on my way to work
I guess that's not possible since the whole idea of working is a patriarcal, cis-powered sterotype!
I smell fake...
>>
>>558056137
10/10
Would kek again
>>
>>558056137

AM I IN KEKISTAN?

10/10
>>
>>558058761
hetero+sexual
i wonder what special category i'm in
>>
>>558066437
>>558066530
sorry to burst your bubble guys but this wont help in a court of law. your best bet is to just bury the bodies.
>>
>>558056137
Someone archive this nigga

10/10 OP would kek again
>>
>>558056137

today OP was not a faggot
>>
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>>558058761
>mfw im a sadokin
>>
>>558072115
done.
http://4archive.org/b/thread/558056137
>>
>>558063971
M8.
>>
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>>558056137

10/10
>>
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>>558063971
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA great b8, can't r8.
>>
>>558056137
You made my day you glorious bigendered omnisexual fem-presenting fat-positive catkin
>>
>>558066754
0/10
>>
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>>558057725
>slow claps
but you are.
>>
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>>558056137
9/10
>>
>>558058761
Polyabled. I am capable of many things! FEAR ME!
>>
booooooooooooooooooooooooooring
>>
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>>558056137
>>
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test
>>
>>558056137


>catkin


Plants have those. Spelled wrong but that's all that matters.
>>
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>>
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>>558056137
>>
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op is a genius or i hadn't seen this pasta before

either way: that was incredibly satistying
>>
>>558058417
>Angry about people preaching at pride parade.
>Defends swearing in public because people will have to hear stuff they don't want to in public

Not being a hypocrite must be a privilege
>>
dunno why, but i'd fuck big red
>>
>>558056137
>drive my mobility scooter behind the counter
lost it
>>
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10/10
Thread replies: 113
Thread images: 38
Thread DB ID: 5700



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