Archived threads in /b/ - Random - 6310. page

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>tfw you'll never take the tube home from work on a rainy late October Friday evening, feeling mildly numb and full of ennui; "but it's ok, things could be worse" you say to yourself as you step out of your tube station, opening up your umbrella and taking a moment to stare at the hazy street lamps, random shops and tail-lights reflecting on the rainy streets; taking a moment to look at your watch, it's 6:07 pm, so you start walking to your flat, stopping on the way to your corner chip shop, the Ocean Fish Bars. you get the usual, large chips to share and two medium cods and scampi, picking up a can of Old Jamaica ginger root beer and an Irn Bru, you go out, saying cheers to Jermaine, he's a good lad even though he's missing two teeth from back in Nigeria. you keep walking home, misty rain in your face but it's ok, because soon you're home and you'll unlock the door and your qt christian refugee gf runs and jumps in your arms, dressed in your burgundy hoodie, kissing you and almost not letting you say hi to her, she's noticing you got some takeaway she gets even happier, she was just about to text you that. she's chipper, having just finished a long assignment for her class. you have your fish and chips while you watch some Inbetweeners episodes and doing shit jokes about #bants and cheeky nandos. after that you dim the lights, put on a record she picked a while ago from a shop run by a and old hippie, lying on the floor, rain hitting the windows. the record ends and she draws a bath for the two of you. you enjoy your bath, looking hazy-eyed at eachother, faint smiles, resting your chin on her left foot, thinking that you've done this before, and yet, you're overwhelmed by a state of pure bliss and you realise, you're finally at peace with yourself. suddenly she breaks the 20 minutes long silence, saying the same thing

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>ITT we pretend to be Americans

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what would you tell your doctor of you think you have carpal tunnel syndrome- if it's definitely from jacking off way too much AND you don't want him to know that you jack off way too much?

bonus points for creativity.

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You have to fuck one of them

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https://bad-dragon.com/jobs

>get a sex toy tester job
>still live with mom
>knock at the door
>"Hunny? Is everything ok?"
>"Yeah I'm working. Remember? I got that job and my package came..."
>"Oh you started work. Can I see your toys?"
>"No mom, that's just wrong"
>"Wait, what was the job?"
>"I work for bad dragon. A sex toy company"
>"Oh...OH MY GOD..."
>"I'll be busy ALL day mother. Can you go buy me a roll of paper towels?"

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Hey anon,

How are things? Is work okay? Is the love life good? Any cool new games you played recently? How's that new band you listened to? Just checking in and hoping the best. You're doing good things, and I'm proud of you.

>ITT let's just chat, tell us about your day

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portland/oregon nudes

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ITT: we stop whining about the voting system and propose actual solutions.

It is very clear that the election was rigged for Drumpf. America is currently in crisis mode, so here is how we fix it...

>Everyone under 25 gets a 5x multiplier since they will have to live with the consequences the longest.

>Everyone who is between the age of 26-49 gets a 2x multiplier.

>Everyone aged 50+ vote's counts as 0.5 as they are matured to the point of having frequent health risks, and not having to worry about the outcome of elections.

>Everyone aged 70+ (A.K.A Baby boomers), votes dont count for shit because they are wrinkly old fucks on medicare and will die very soon anyway.

>African Americans get a 5x multiplier for 188 elections since thats how long they were restricted the right to vote, aswell as being victims of racial discrimination.

>Any other Americans of color gets a 3x multiplier for 100 elections as compensation due to white oppression throughout the 20th century, while contributing to our society.

>Women get a 5x multiplier for 144 elections since they were restricted access to voting, aswell as being sexually oppressed.

>Anyone who is a part of the LGBTQ community gets a 2x multiplier stack due to being victims of homophobic discrimination.

>Anyone who is a part of the Islamic faith gets a 2.5 multiplier due to currently being victims of racial discrimination.

>If you have a PhD diploma in gender studies, your vote will get a 3x multiplier since we dont want dumbasses making decisions for the rest of the country.

>Illegal immigrants count as a single vote REGARDLESS due to having poor quality of life, UNLESS they are in possession of a green card. In which case they get 3x if colored, 5x if of African origin.

Example #1: A white 50 year old woman with no degree's vote will count as 2.5

Example #2: A black 19 year old woman's vote will count as 25 votes

Example #3: A white 40 year old man with no degree will count as 2 votes

Come on people its 2017!

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Dat ass thread.
Pic related
My wife

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Ride should never end. Keep simple, keep s/fur

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Dubs decide what I do with pic related

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Today we conquer the world!

2D general; loli, fur, poke, shota, etc.

Round 4 let's go

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I've never been on reddit before. Should I check it out? Is it interesting at all? Or is it basically a lesser 4chan?
Pic unrelated

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Love

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What does /b/ drive?

Pic related - My whip.