>Just found out my wife of 5 years has been cheating on me for the last year with a scrawny drug dealing fuck for a year now
>Literally on the verge of killing myself
She is actively trying to get a hold of me on the phone, since I locked her out. She knows that I know. She also knows that I had a history of severe depression, and is probably afraid I'm going to do something.
Which I may, or may not. I haven't decided yet, but I've never felt hurt like this before, it is insane. What do you do? I don't mean over the long run, I mean like right now. Because I'm not doing so good.
Best way to get over your old girl is to get under a new one. Get on tinder and hatefuck some college girl. As far as serious advice goes, I can't imagine what you're going through. Take a benadryl and have a beer, maybe blaze a bit and get lost in a hobby of yours. Or just start trashing her shit.
How'd you find out?
I wish, I get matches on tinder but nobody ever messages me back except for bots. Been messing around with it today.
I wish I had some cold beers and weed. But I'm new to this city, don't have any contacts.
You should be celebrating in the fucking streets, mate. She might've kept her whoredom hidden for years. You have no idea how horrible a divorce is when there are children involved, and how easy by comparison when there aren't. Dump the bitch. Don't even think twice about it. If you keep her around, the same thing will happen again.
I didn't start using it until today, nowhere did I say I was using it WHILE with her. Could you try not to grasp at straws?
I started using it at like 6 this morning, got a bunch of matches, but nobody replies.
Shits tough man, take the time you need away from work/commitments if you fell it will help.
The best way to start seeing the brighter side of things, is to start doing the things she wouldn't let you.
For example: Lets say you never order chineese food, because your wife doesn't like it.
Order some fucking Chinese food tonight.
It may sound stupid, but start small.
You won't get over this shit in a day or a week or maybe even a year. But every little thing you do for YOURSELF and not anyone else will make you feel a little bit better.
Also, take the first tinder date you can get. (i'm talking go for the 19 yr old college girls, and the fattys. Just get out there, and get under someone. It'll help.
I don't think I have the same standards regarding fidelity as you, OP.
But talking from the place of experiencing a different sort of betrayal, all you can do is hold on for your dear life to anything - substance or diversion or what else - and try to do whatever you can think of that allows you to take a few steps back without falling over. Things like these need time. You need time. So hang out with people, don't hang out with people, just go out to random places, drink, do something you don't do normally, just as long as it keeps you from doing something permanent that you have no opportunity to take back. Your life is still ahead. I'm the same age as you - have a similar situation in my life - so I have to tell you that, anyway. It fucking goes on.
care to explain your history with her? i'm assuming that you're one of those guys who marry out of desperation and completely ignore red flags, also, being married for 5 years and not having any child is really weird.
>marry out of desperation and completely ignore red flags
The majority of humans "are cheaters". The red flag is having functional sex organs and the opportunity to interact with others outside of the partner's visual range.
Some people are genuinely capable of self-control. Temptation is unavoidable, cheating is not. Cheating is a conscious decision, it requires planning and willful deception.
Sometimes people in long relationships fuck up, something happens spontaneously, but they don't hide it and they don't do it again and it can be forgiven. Carrying on an affair for a whole year, only five years into a marriage, is a completely different story.
>Literally on the verge of killing myself
For fuck's sake pull yourself together mate. That's like saying "someone thumped me on the nose, so now I'm going to pull all my teeth out with pliers". Seriously now, if you're going to kill anyone, kill him, or her, or go the whole hog and get both of them.
Sure, you'll go to prison for it, but you can plead diminished responsibility, and with good behaviour you'll be out in ten years, plus you get the satisfaction of knowing the people who hurt you are both pushing up daisies. Ten years might sound like a lot, but if you kill yourself, that's forever. Everyone will pour sympathy on her, "no wonder you turned to another man for comfort, we had no idea your husband was insane". She'll be telling everyone you beat her, raped her, took all her money, and because you're not there to defend yourself, everyone will believe her. The worst part is she'll take all the money you have, she'll sell all your possesions, everything you worked hard for she will trade for a quick buck. Then she'll move him in to your house. He'll be going ass to mouth on your wife, on your bed, in your house, and you'll be too busy being dead to do anything about it.
I've nothing against suicide per se, I just think that in your case it's the worst possible option.
Start gathering all the evidence that she cheated, and go get a lawyer. That's if you want a divorce. Honestly I think if this affair has been going on for a while (not just a one off thing) you ought to divorce her. Staying with someone you can't trust is just going to be more damaging to your mental health.
Pretend nothing happened.
Then a few months from take the car and all the valuables and move to a new state.
You can always have suicide as a back-up, but please choose a humane way of doing it. And by humane I mean fiscally responsible. ERs have enough shit to deal with.
Why do men always turn to sex when they're upset? it's so pathetic. The first thing you do is want to fuck someone else. In this case, I can understand considering she cheated on you, but it seems like it's this way for all guys even ones that don't get cheated on.
I said I understood considering she cheated on him, but it still seems like men are like this without getting cheated on. Good job at reading my whole post.
But its just really sleazy. And half the time you still don't get over them. Just because you fuck someone else, doesn't make you automatically stop thinking about that other person.
bruh, she was fucking some druggie behind your back for a year.
why are you still thinking of her? she isn't who you thought she was else she wouldn't have been getting pounded by that meth head and his friends every friday, swallowing their AIDs ridden jizz, and laughing about you to her new friends.
go get checked for stds. throw her shit out onto your porch. hit the gym. get in touch with your friends. date when you're ready.
>he fell for the vagina jew
women are not men and they do not have honor or loyalty like men do. this is why the most violent criminals will not hurt each other if they are on the same side.
Don't kill yourself. It doesn't achieve anything other than making more space for her and the dude fucking her.
Get out of the marriage asap. Empty any joint bank accounts but don't spend it. Freeze her credit cards by reporting them stolen.
If you're joint tennants then change the door locks and don't answer her knocking and yelling. Make her pay for a lock smith to let her in if she has a right to be there.
Move her shit out of the bedroom and dump it in the living room.
Most of all DON'T TALK TO HER and this will make her crazy. You absolutely fucking ignore her - just pretend she doesn't exist.
File for divorce if you live in a no-fault state. Put half of the money you 'froze' when you emptied the bank account in an envelope and give it to your lawyer to hand over.
Get the fuck out but do everything you can to inflict mental torture. You should know the screws to turn. Make sure her family and friends know she's been fcking the local dealer and imply she's whoring herself out for drugs. Infer she's caught some STD and given it to you. Gossip will do the rest.
Right now..... do whatever little things will make her crazy and you feel better. Busy hands are good for the mind. Throw stuff she needs in the trash. Fuck up her comfort zone but nothing she'll notice immediately but when she does she'll go nuts.
Most of all DON"T TALK TO HER and throw her out of the shared zones.
this you could be paying child support to a cheating wife and don't even expect to win custody of your kids because they are not the property of fathers anymore but the property of the state and the mother.
It's not precautions. Read it agains. This is to fuck with her head and inflict maximum revenge without overstepping the mark.
She'll go nuts at getting the silent treatment and what's she going to do about it... run off and fuck some random dude?
You know what I would really do in your position. Just walk the fuck away. If you have kids with this bitch, take them, they don't need a mom that fucks drug dealers.
Go do whatever you have always wanted to do. Life is fucking short to beat yourself up about whores. Statistically you are in good company, most marriages in in divorce.