>>16884842 How do I stop feeling jealous and losing self esteem in a relationship?
I'm jealous of literally everything my partner has, and in turn, my self esteem lowers, which makes me think I'm even worse than my partner, which makes me even more jealous, until I'm feeling more hatred than love (even though it's entirely unintentional)
I've been seeing this women romantically for two months now and she has these random bouts of being unreachable and it's starting to bother me. I also find it rude that if I text you I don't hear from you three days from the time I texted you I don't even text every day. Am I overreacting?
I told my crush I liked her, and it was taken very well. My best friend pushed me to ask her out at thee next time I could possibly get her alone, and I thought this a good idea at the time, but looking back it really wasn't a good time or good choice of words which was my fault. She feels blame for confusing me and 'leading me on' which she wasn't and I know that (even at the time), so I feel it was more my best friend's fault now. He really pushed me to do it. The answer was no, but in the form of an *it's not you it's me* message (really messy situation in college with ex, and college ends in a few months), so I feel there's still hope.
That's my situation, and my question is - what would you do? Would you wait or explain this? This is my first time really doing this so any advice is great
>>16885040 school is specifically designed to separate people, not everyone can be on top
don't be comparing yourself specifically with your partner, their results arn't the benchmark for you; your whole school is spread out on a range of performance look to how well you are doing on average
I'm not going to say school not important because it is, if you want to do as well as your partner you're going to have to put the work in.
but plenty of people who don't do well in school do well in life; but it's about what you want for yourself, if you want to be a physicist or a teacher or a trades-person etc
so ask yourself A. are you below average on your marks, or are you just dating a high achiever B. how well do you need to do in school for your life plans
>>16885066 well I mean it is rude for sure, but different things could be made of that
maybe she's not that into you, that's the worst case scenario maybe she's just disorganized maybe she's nervous talking to you or maybe she doesn't see being reachable as important, and it's nothing to do with you personally
I can't tell you why she does it, I don't have a crystal ball maybe you have a gut feeling on this because you know her
but I'm going to put it out there that not replying to texts, especially if they are just smalltalk is not THAT rude, it's rude sure; but don't blow a fuse over it man
>>16885114 Do you think I should call her just to see wtf is going on? She left my house Friday morning saying she needed to go to the doctor for a cat scan and later that day she was going to a concert. I was more concerned about the cat scan but when I called her phone went to voice-mail I figured she was at work and then I texted her last night got no response
Im a complete failure of a person and i dont even know where to begin to fix myself.
I have no friends, i never dated, i suck at socializing, i dont have any normal hobbies, i cant drive, i cant cook, i dont have any skills, i only go outside to work and study, im fat and ugly, i still live with my parents, i cant grow a beard and i think im starting to go bald.
So I've had a big crush on my coworker since like around thanksgiving. It kind of came to fruition like 2 weeks ago and I asked him out for a drink and it ended with me making out with him before I left. We went to see a movie a few days later and then I accidentally spent the night with him after we messed around.
Since then we haven't talked about it. We talk like normal friends at work, although I do have some bouts where I kind of avoid him. I mean I'm also mad I even have a crush on him anyway, my friend egged me on to ask him out for a drink, but I just know any kind of semblance of a relationship with him will end badly or blow up in my face.
I'm scared to text him anyway... I have a feeling he might feel the same as me (like does like me but is also scared, cause when we were messing around we talked too and he seems like he would probably do that too)... I catch him looking at me a lot at work when I'm semi avoiding him and he look away really quick
I should stop talking to him and move to another state right?
I'm in a new relationship. We went on a date that went very well in terms of comminication and I tried twice to touch her, putting my arm around her shoulder and holding her hand. She reciprocated well on both I ended both within a couple minutes because we were walking around town and had to keep moving, sort of a bitch move. I'm stupid and didn't kiss her goodbye but we hugged for a long time. We talk well with each other but she hasn't initiated any sort of intimacy and I chicken out every time I think I should. I honestly feel like more friends with her thn anything but I know I want more and I'm not sure what she thinks we are. What are some good first moves or other tips for this situation?
>>16885356 Well I did kind of tell him I had had a crush on him for awhile and that I had a few dreams about him.
I think I'm just scared to text him cause I was trying to a week ago on Facebook and I thought he was ignoring me and got upset with myself (I didn't freak out at him) and at work he said he couldn't respond to them for some reason so we exchanged numbers.
Now I'm like to afraid to bug him, I guess he's date-able I just feel like it's like a whole new low for me or something....
Gf doesn't tell me how she sees me or what she thinks about me, only goes and praises me to her male best friend, with whom she's very tight. With me, she treats me like shit, and doesn't show at all that she likes me. What gives?
Would you rather have short term happiness, or long term happiness at the expense of the short term.
Everyone says your early twenties / teens are supposed to be the peak of life but I just have no real motivation for going out and "seizing" the day.
I'm relatively productive. I read, write, workout, practice violin, and have a couple buddies. But there's not a whole lot of meaning to anything. Seems like everything is just going to come down to careers so I may as well work at getting better right now to prepare.
The prospect of trying to "go out and get laid" or anything like that seems so superfluous in comparison.
>>16885422 thanks anon, I think she's really someone special so I don't want to lose her with too much affection. Part of the problem is that I get really nervous and scared when I'm with a date so thinking of her as "just a friend" really helps wheb talking so it'll be hard to make that transition to intimacy. Taking things slow is probably best
Okay so, I'm a college student and I NEED a new job. Something that pays above minimum wage, and gives lots of hours. Something that doesn't require me to drive or have reliable transportation(no car, that's what I need money for but I take the bus and train).
>>16885503 I mean that's not really it, it's more that I don't feel like I'm worth it. I don't bring anything to the table besides pussy, and pussy doesn't pay rent or anything.
I want to move forward but I'm scared because I've failed so much, and I still don't know exactly what I want to do. I still feel that urge to go back to EMS even though I know it's a career dead end, but then I also want to work in publishing, but I have no idea how to get there.
He mentioned one of his friends might get him an apprenticeship in a city about an hour from here, and he wants to do it... and I feel like that might be giving him pause about us to. He also thinks I'm really serious about moving to Portland in the near future... which I mean to be honest... Probably won't happen
And the city he would move to, I mean I go there a lot. My army unit is there, when I go drink I go there... I mean just because he's an hour away doesn't mean I'd stop liking him I dunno
>>16885403 Then she either has feelings for him or likes torturing him, since she is aware the guy has a crush on her.
>>16885439 She doesn't tell me anything whatsoever. It's alienating. I'm never good enough, everything I do just annoys her, she's always snappy with me, while she treats her friends way better, doesn't want to make an effort to make things good between us.
>>16885541 well it's no good if she's being snappy with you man
either you're annoying her with something, she is a snappy person or your relationship isn't going too well
but again I can't see what's going on myself, you could just be over-reacting look man, maybe it's not what you want to hear but it seems to me like you have some low self esteem and that's making you overly sensetive and that causes the jealousy and feeling like your girl is paying out on you
How do I not fuck up at an interview? Autistic rant inc. I've never had a job before, I'm only 18 so it's not insanely loser-y but I'm behind the curve, I live in a big ass city and at any given position (even entry-level fast food like McDonalds) there's at least a couple people with years of experience at my age or older applying. I had an interview last week and I tanked it, I thought I knew what to say but I didn't really and I'm so fucking anxious about these things I can barely sleep or function. I have one tomorrow and I bet I'm going to fuck it up again too. How do I answer their questions? I have no skills, I dropped out of high school, there's literally no reason they should hire me over other candidates. I'll probably quit after a week. I don't think I can handle it. I mean I'd never say any of those things but it comes off in my body language.
Anyone on here have disability? I didn't want to give up on life so early but should I just apply for the neetbux? I've been telling myself that I wouldn't get it because I'm not that disabled and I COULD get a job, but I've been thinking maybe I can't. I have severe PTSD and it makes leaving my house absolute hell. I can barely be in the same room as a member of the opposite sex alone without being on the verge of a panic attack. I have a pretty extensive mental health record with around ~3 years worth of hospitalizations, therapists, failed residential + outpatient treatments, and even a 6 month civil commitment. Please help I just want to be a normal person.
I failed my second year of university due to depression (not using it as an excuse, I know I fucked up a lot last year). I only failed one module, and did pretty well overall, still getting a 2:1 (second highest grade). Because I'm only doing one module, I have loads of free time, which I've been using to get my shit together, and, for me, that involves studying a lot of areas unrelated to my course. The problem is, because of this, I'm starting to doubt whether I'm doing the right thing at university.
I study biochemistry, but have recently really started enjoying psychology, to the point that I'm considering switching course. There's only a couple of months left of this academic year, though, and afterwards, I'd only have one more year left. So I don't know if I should switch now, having to start my bachelors again, or just finish my current course, and then pursue a masters in psychology - I know my current uni offers a course just for people who are transferring from subjects other than psychology.
Sorry if this post was a bit jumbled, I'm pretty tired. But, any advice?
You asked for specific questions...It's not entirely specific, but fuck it
How do I stop giving up on shit? I can't seem to stick with anything for a long period of time no matter what it is. It's like some misfire in my head that prevents my from continuing a task for a pro longed period and as a result I never make any progress.
I Live with my boyfriend. He just let me know that he doesn't like to hang out with me because he has more important things to be doing and he really does, but I'm still a little hurt that he can't take a night off to just relax with me. The only time he gives me is in the morning when we're getting ready for the day and at night when he's ready to eat, have sex and go to bed. I told him that I'm patient enough for him to start improving himself and eventually he'll want to start giving me time when he's reaching progress. He says it's not fair for me, but really I don't think he'll want to waste time with me until he's reached his goals. Is it really right for me to give him all the space he needs and wait for him to want to hang out with me when he feels ready? Or should he stop being self-centered and actually try to meet my wants?
Me and girl have thing, but don't want things to get serious because she's going abroad next semester and I intend to go abroad the semester after, and I couldn't really see two months of being together justifying a year of not. But still like her, she's super cool, and talk to her od. I ask her if we can go from a 'boyfriend girlfriend' situation to taking off labels and playing it by ear, she agrees, based on the circumstances.
That was last semester. I've still been talking to her a lot, and I really do like her, but I need sex, so I've been on the whole one night stand game with randos. But I think I may have not been clear about the open relationship situation cause she says she like blatantly said she hasn't been getting with other people.
What do? Do I tell her I've been sleeping with other girls (which will probably change / ruin the whole talking od situation but I don't wanna break her heart)? Or should I just keep it to myself, and presume she understands but just isn't tryna sleep around?
for entry level positions of your kind the most important thing for an employer is reliability, often employers struggle to find people in hat bracket of labour who can A. turn up on time, with the right uniform, looking presentable B. not fight with their co-workers, spit the dummy etc
so your number one aim is to appear reliable, friendly and presentable
I have a lot of anxiety myself, it's not a selling point and you shouldn't advertise it they will expect people to be nervous in an interview so you get an advantage there
they will try to sound you out in the interview to work out a few things
are you lazy, do you really want to work at all? they might ask this as "why do you want to work here", or if they are rude maybe "why haven't you had a job before" have a positive answer to both of these questions
are you rude, aggressive, a criminal or a drug user be polite, if asked it's best I think to answer these questions directly and not take offense "do you do drugs?" "no, I don't" remember it's OK to take your time before you answer, you ge no points for answering quickly
So, this girl would >would make sure I overhear that she has a boyfriend all of a sudden, probably because another friend was talking loudly that a girl was being good to me >she won't mention another guy to me at all >sometimes will check me out, but other times won't even look at me >will care for me and ask how i am >will keep an eye on me when I'm being chummy with another female friend
Two questions. My significant other smokes weed occasionally. I don't really approve (never taken any drugs and don't see the point) and I think he makes a point to tell everyone he can and basically paints me as the fun police. How do I become OK with him doing it. I don't plan on smoking, but eventually I'd like not to be see as - stuck in the mud. I'm also thinking of going teetotal. I enjoy occasional glass of beer/wine with food, but drinking for the sake of drinking does very little for me. Is going teetotal a good idea? Do you think my SO would be offended? Or should I just drink a little to sustain an "acceptable" front?
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