In what situations one should engage in physical conflict? When is it reasonable to actually ''fight'', you winning or not? Men seem so afraid of fights nowadays. I see it as something bad, but necessery if the situation requires. However, my visions are rather skewed. When one should engage? What are the tipping points where diplomacy isn't viable/shouldn't be used anymore?
>You are being attacked or threatened with physical force
If not you probably shouldnt fight someone.
Now personally I take actions I know will escalate to a fight, but I dont engage in unwanted confrontation. Its just stupid.
So if someone is shouting in my face, itd be dumb to engage in a shouting match with them or hit them. Im not a fucking child. That being said Im petty enough to push their face away from mine, which I know is likely to spark a fight.
Let's say for example; someone just starts ''bullying''(words seems kinda childish), as in, provocking you for no reason on the street, or someone hits on your girlfriend when she's with you and clearly does so in a disrespecting, threatening manner., or even if there's the simple low disrespect that happens to strike a nerve, specially if it's intentional. Should physical conflict be used?
Only after it is absolutely clear no other course of action is available. Even after that,full blown fights are still avoidable. Not less than 4 fights I was in ended with one hit. All you have to do is stay calm, and make them look as stupid as they are for starting the fight.
Fights don't happen unless you're looking for a fight.
If a fight is unavoidable, it's usually because you're being mugged or went somewhere you should've avoided, and are disadvantaged either way because they are likely to just have weapons.
Don't even have this shit on your mind unless you live in an incredibly shitty neighbourhood and go out drinking all the time.
Fighting is dangerous and should be avoided at all costs. People could have have guns, knives, or just be trained martial artists. And the type of guy who would start a fight with a stranger probably has little to lose.
That being said, if you really see no other way out strike first and as hard as possible. Open up with a hard cross/jab and bum rush him. Try to knock him out in less than 10 seconds, or he might be able to gain the upper hand.
By no means i'm intending to fight someone right now, however, do tell; what would you do in the mentioned situations? What if they have the added ''continuous harassing'' detail?
Of course not. Im not such an insecure child to be provoked by such actions. Usually when this stuff happens my girl clings tightly to my arm so I couldnt fight even if I wanted to.
You cant fix disrespect with violence. Thats just you being a faggot.
>bullying on the street
Entering any building does wonders. If you are surrounded, though, grab the one that is armed and take him down fast.
>Hits your girlfriend
Honestly I would hit them back, thought the right thing to do would be to talk to her about it instead of confronting the person who did it. Unless it's continuous, then you beat the everliving shit out of him.
>Disrespect that strikes a nerve
No excuses for this one. Barn your tongue and sharpen your wits. No need for fighting.
in what form?
I mean, as a younger guy I got in a couple fights. All of them could have been avoided except 1.
Like I said, de-escalate by saying
>look man I don't want to have any problems with you, I'm just trying to have a good time with my friends
Unless you're in a dark alley this will attract attention and you may be able to recruit others to de-escalate.
However if he says
>well you got trouble
Take a step or two back and say
>seriously man I'm not looking for trouble
If you've retreated and he continues to approach you you're well within you legal rights in burgerland to punch/stab/shoot him.
In fact, many states have "no duty to retreat laws". So you theoretically wouldn't even be obligated to de-escalate before pulling out the heater and killing him.
May I ask why you're so concerned about this?
>Hits on your girlfriend*
Sorry for that typo. Also, what if you can't enter in a building? Is avoiding a fight that much really necessery if the guy isn't armed(hypothetically if you could tell right away)
As stated, i'm asking out of curiosity, not planning to fight anyone.
You just ignore them? Pretend you're not listening? Pretend there's nothing happening?
>You just ignore them?
Im on a date with my girl. I have better things planned than getting in a fight. Its putting her first.
And even if I wasnt on a date, fighting is a waste of time. My ego isnt that fragile. You cant damage it by shouting. Theres no need for me to confront you. If Im feeling it I might confront you about how disrespectful you are, but it you arent hearing that Ill just continue whatever I was going to do because you arent significant enough for me to change that. Stop being a child.
I live close to unstable people, one particularly known to have the shortest temper one can have. I started to wonder how is the everyday life of someone who actively likes to attempt to display how ''crazy'', ''manly'', and ''bersekish'' he is. As i also go on the everyday life, i always wonder what one would do in different kinds of conflicts, what one would do in a few aggravating scenarios, specially ones i usually see posted around here, so here am i.
I think i'm getting what you mean. What about the street harassing? Let's say one or two men start doing minor provockative behaviors towards you for nothing in particular, such as your clothes, hairstyle, way of walking, something you're holding, etc. and you can clearly hear them, they also know you're hearing them. You just ignore them? Avoid eye contact? What is your behavior?
Regarding the girlfriend part. If the dude hitting on her is insisting on the behavior, stressing the ''disrespectful manner'' part, what would you do/say?
>Is avoiding a fight that much really necessary
Fights are a last resort. People can easily get hurt, and the streets are highly unpredictable. A fight can drastically change from a short scuffle to an attempted murder scene with a bit of broken glass, a lucky hit with some keys, a glass jaw, a well placed punch. Better to completely avoid the situation than trying your luck.
>When the guy isn't armed
You never know who can fight and who can't. Take me. I'm 30 pounds overweight in fat, short, not particularly large and generally hunch and look unassuming. But I'm a green belt in karate, can press 180 and run three miles. I've willingly taken several kicks to the balls to break a person's nose. I once fought off 8 guys (granted they were all 16 or so) by myself, breaking bones, damaging organs and mentally terrorizing them even to this day when I see them. Yet I would still call myself a pacifist. You never really know who will react in what way.
If you can't enter a building, and you are actively blocked or surrounded, then by all means beat the shit out of them. But not before.
Is there a reason why I have to acknowledge them. If Im trapped in a room with them then I might say something. But Im not a fucking child. Im not even phased by stuff like that. Id be more concerned about how my gf is taking it.
I meant hypothetically speaking, if you knew they didn't have a weapon, but i'm getting your point. I'm realizing the posters here would just ignore thee insults towards them, however, what if we take the girlfriend/friend situation, where they're disrespected, or if someone/some people are disrespecting you through them(like the hitting on your girlfriend in front of you scenario)?
Putting myself in this situation, i'd feel really shitty if i went out of my way just to avoid a few assholes on the street, specially weaker looking ones. Is this a bad mentality? Why?
Its not avoiding them if you dont see them. Ive trained in martial arts since a kid. I can easily kick someones ass. Its not even a fight for me when I do, its just me bullying them. I dont need to prove myself. You really need to grow up.
Is this really a good enough reason to start violence? Common sense says no, but I know if I was put in that situation I would. That does not make it right. If this happens, you should be more concerned about how your girlfriend feels about this than what some random fuckers on the street gurgled through their throats while trying to suck their own cocks. Plus, your girlfriend can handle herself most likely. Either way, she's your priority, not them.
>she's your priority, not them.
This is what Im trying to convey to this kid. Did you really think about her. Ive been mugged before, held at gun point and disarmed people. But you really start thinking about this when you have someone with you. Yeah I can disarm the guy in front of me. But what if they pull a gun on her. Stop being a fucking child and get her to safety.
Question; is it ever accepted to fight to defend your ''honor'' (cringe aside), if you didn't manage to avoid getting it hurt in the first place, like the other anon said (using wits)?
That is a good advice, thank you. Perhaps observing if she's uncomfortable really is the best way, and acting based on that.
My question is; if you DO see them. Hear them, look at them in a whim. You just pretend you didn't notice? You're strong, i get it. You can handle yourself, so can i. But i'm asking in THIS certain situation. I'm rather autistic, so i'm looking for insight of non-autistic-as-much people.
You dont get it. I dont register people like that.
All I hear are kids who think its cool to insult people they dont know. I dont have time for that. Im too old for this shit. Im not a child. I dont enjoy playing with edgy children. Its nothing more than background noise to me. I see them. But I dont see anything worth acknowledging.
I know that if I were born male I'd be a bar brawler. I tend to date guys who fight. But I'm old and it was more common in the '80's-'90s' I guess. I hate fighting and violence and I've managed to stop a few in my day. But I had this big crush on a guy who worked at Whole Foods who's face was always fucked up from fights. He was so hot I couldn't stand in his line I'd get so nervous.
Like I said I'm female and I won't fight but I'll confess I"ve kicked REAL close to a bitch's head once, just to scare her. I'm very controlled with my kicks I can get them within inches of a stupid fucking meth hoe who had the goddamned gall to insult my ROSARY. Yeah. You do NOT do that. I know guys in my neighborhood who wear rosaries around their necks, big tough Mexican dudes. And I dont want to even think about what would happen if a dumb fucking cunt insulted their rosaries. But women think they can say any goddamned thing and not pay for it.
Fuck that shit.
Women are so weird, and so stupid. Whenever I see posts like this I wonder how the suffragettes convinced men to let them vote. Like seriously, only twice in my life have I ever had a political discussion with a female where they even attempted to be logical.
Fucking strange creatures man.
Violence is acceptable when it's NECESSARY to protect yourself or someone else from violence. And you have to at least try to talk through it first, unless it's happening too fast and you just have to do something.
If you're "throwing the first punch," so to speak, I think 99% of the time you'd be in the wrong. A physical retaliation to a verbal attack is never OK unless it's a direct threat of violence
Different guy, but here's a step by step for what I'd do (and have done in the past) in case that helps you: look straight at them. Shoulders back, head high, eyes clear and focused. Smile confidently, maybe smirk a little or laugh at them if you can pull it off, then shake your head slightly and move on. "Ignoring them" doesn't always mean literally pretending you didn't hear them, although that's an option too. Your safety comes first, then your ego, but usually you don't have to compromise one to protect the other.
I don't know how to fight. I've never taken a martial arts class, don't really care to, and don't feel particularly diminished as a man for that fact and neither should you. If somebody actually threatens you, verbally or physically (as opposed to just acting rude or belligerent in which case just treat them per the above) then just say something along the lines of, "No, I'm not interested in fighting you. Threaten me again and I'm calling the police. Don't try to prevent me from calling, that's a felony." They might mutter something about you being a pussy but nine times out of ten they'll slump away and it's pretty clear who acquitted themselves better.
When I started going to bars in college I did actually work all that out in my head ahead of time. That's no guarantor of how it'll work in practice but it does help to know what the fuck you're "supposed" to do instead of standing there wondering, uh, how do I get out of this, am I a pussy if I don't fight him? The answer is no, it's not "alpha" to let some twat ruin your night and don't let anybody tell you differently.
Obviously that's advice for dealing with your typical drunk/belligerent young dudes, the kinds of people to hit on your girlfriend or try to provoke you on the street. That's not how you should deal with seriously dangerous criminals. You're on your own as far as that goes, but I'd suggest you make best use of your legs and get out of there as fast as you can.
>Is it ever acceptable to defend your honor
Unless it is directly challenged by violence, no. Honor dueling as a concept is outdated because back when it was relevant men prided themselves on their physical prowess or skill. They had to, in order to survive. Nowadays diplomacy is the new weapon, and violence is always frowned upon. A battle lost in diplomacy damages nothing but your pride.
If some asswipe insults you for no reason and you choose to dignify it with a response, you are literally on the same level as this guy.