I've lived below this really gorgeous and out of my league chick for about a year now, and I just realized that I've really spoken to her and she's never really spoken to me because I'm always walking around looking all mopey and standoffish and shit. The extent of our relationship is occasionally very quietly saying hi to each other on the stairwell and I slink away like an autist.
Like, I don't want to go out with her, she's way out of my league, I just think it's kinda bad that I don't know any of my neighbors.
How do I casually make conversation with someone when you've been ignoring them for a year?
Like, okay. Have you ever gone through life fully knowing that people are just putting up with you? Have you ever been talking to someone and heard the exhaustion in their voice, or seen their eyes drift away like anywhere else would be a better place to be than here?
Have you ever genuinely gone through your entire life watching dozens of people you grew up with and really cared about casually throw you aside like you never meant anything to them?
Have you ever genuinely tried to improve yourself, to be funny and charming and to put yourself out there and really try to improve your life and all of your efforts just crash and burn, and year after year, it's the same, no matter how hard you try?
Stop pretending that someone like me can just ask a neighbor about the weather or some shit. There's a reason why I fucking live like a hermit. Every single person I've ever known has rejected me since day fucking one. It's not easy, it will never be easy, and this fucking forum of all places should be the one place in the world where everyone actually understands what true loneliness is. But instead it's just >tfw no gf
I don't talk to anyone, ever. Because I've seen how it will play out, time and time again. The pretty neighbor girl and countless other people are too sane, happy and normal to ever even think about accepting this much baggage into their lives.
>>16878902 Could be her projecting bad experiences or her worst fears.
Does she bring up anything specific?
I was extremely insecure in many of my relationships. She's the one that has to fix it, not you. All you can do is rationalize her accusations and reassure her, but she's the one that has to trust you. It can literally destroy her relationship.
Also, does she hang out with a lot of single females or party-ish females? I always had female friends tell me the worst when I was in relationships. If I'd even just say "Man, my bf hasn't text me back yet." to them casually, they'd always be like "The fuck? What's he doing? Who's he with?" And they'd just increase my fears, very convincingly.
>>16878911 I always text her back unless I'm sleeping or something. Always invite her with me wherever I'm going and if she asks I tell her where and with who I am. Starting to really think I'm being punished by some previous experience of hers.
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