i have a relationship question, wondering if anyone can relate here
so my gf and me are soon together for a year and we're quite happy and sex is great
she's 4 years younger than me, im 22
who is josh: some guy who's in her friendzone since forever, like 4-5 years
he is so beta it's unbelievable
so today she just randomly texted me:
>her: josh asked me today if i want to be his model for arts class
>her :egon schiele style
>me: you.naked.in.front.of.him, staring at you for hours, alone in a room
>her: what's the big deal? it's just for school
>me: you do realize he loves you?
>her: no he doesnt
>me: he's so deep in the friendzone you're not even realizing
>me: i couldnt care less if it's for art class, but not for a guy who tried to get to you for years
>me: he's not only in for artistic reason, but much more for personal reason, he craves to see you naked
>me: you think he just randomly asked you? so obvious
>her: stop it
I'm so fucking angry right now. Not because I fear anything happens, absolutely not, but only for the reason that he sees my gf absolutely naked and that if we are all in the same room the atmosphere will be like: dude i saw your chick naked and drew her for hours, i looked at her tits for hours, umad?
yes, i mad. mostly the fact thaz she was just like yeah cool lets do it
is it a good idea if i meet this hot chick that wanted to fuck me for a long time just to cook a little and go to a club or something (not intending on cheating). i wont tell my gf anything about that but if this is going to happen and she texts me 'watcha doing?' ill be just like, hanging out with the hot chick you hate so much
how to deal with this?
You're right but you still fucked up. Cuz now she's gonna say that you think any guy that talks to her is only after her pussy. That she doesn't have anything else to offer, that she's not interesting. As much as it's fucked, she's never gonna see your side cuz "the friend zone doesn't exist teehee silly boys."
I know. I wrote this in a hurry while angry but let's not focus on the formalities but much rather on the matter of fact
This is my way oof thinking about it:
1: i feel absolute disgust at the thought of josh drawing her and looking at her pussy and tits for hours. It's a slap in the face because it's so obvious he wants her and uses art and school as means of accomplishing his perv little goal. my gf is so gullible and falls for it.
I'm also her first boyfriend and took her virginity, doing what she does shows me that it's nothing special that I can see her naked but the whole world can if it's for her beta friend and his art school. I absolutely disagree
2: Am I the only one who would feels that way? If yes, how would you personally deal with it with your inner self?
I can't help but lose mad respect for her if she's going to do it. It's just the way I am. I'm all for loyality and trust but this is definitely the line for me.
How do I deal with this.
he's sometimes over for dinner and we have it all good and we talk and drink beer and stuff
then next week he's going to draw her naked
booom! game change, if he's ever to come over again it's going to be so awkward for me, knowing that he stared at my gfs pussy and tits for hours being the little perv he is
it will destroy me from inside out
Is it normal that I feel that way?
If she looks or acts anything like the pulp fiction chick , then you can't control her but hope your dick was good enough.
And secondly, if that dude still wants her then you have more of a reason to hold on to her.
Really, so you think he'll spray some [insert dangerous chemical] and she'll be unconscious till he fucks her silly then boy, you are really are retarded to think she isn't strong enough to know who to fuck and when.
Let me be clear: how you're feeling is reasonable. When I said you were acting like a child, I was referring to your plan to make her jealous by hanging out with somebody she hates. Leave mind games like that in high school where they belong.
An appropriate response would be to tell her something like, "Look, if you really want to get into nude modeling [as a job], we can talk about it, but I'm a guy, I know how guys think, and I know that THIS guy has ulterior motives. It's OK that you disagree, but I'm asking you to please just trust me on this. I trust you and I'm not worried about you cheating on me; that doesn't change the fact that I'm uncomfortable with it. I can't stop you, but I'm not okay with it, and if you do it anyway it's going to have consequences for our relationship."
Obviously put that in your own words, but you get the gist. The right thing to do is to talk to her about it, without getting accusatory or upset, but without giving up any ground, either.
I agree that she's acting very naive and immature, but that's the problem with dating an 18-year-old.
i'm just so fucking baffled right now
i cant believe this fucking shit
she just texted me "just kidding"
following: but it shows me how you're feeling about my friend and how jealous you really are
We're almost together for a year now, I expected this highschool bullshit psycho games to happen in the first months, if ever.
but one year into the relationship it hit me really hard now, she has never done that before
i dont know what to think anymore
how could she be that immature
guys help me elaborate the situation please
i told her how the fuck she could do that, how childish this is but she's acting all self-righteous and calling a martyr who's trying to make her a bad conscience for what she has done
this is a hard time for me
i never expected that kind of behaviour from her
but i still love her with all my heart
how would you handle this situation guys?
talk to her about this behaviour? or not talk to her for a day to let her cool down and reflect her behaviour?
you need to gtfo immediately
trust me, anon. this is a very bad sign. the reddest of flags. id bet everything i have on her being mentally ill. if you stay with this girl, you will be voluntarily entering a world of pain. call her, break up with her in a quick, decisive manner, and initiate radio silence. proceed to have sexual relations with other girls.
late over here so bit jarbled.. anyhow
Anon speaks the truth. She has motives for doing this, maybe just shit testing and random sizing you up, or something else. It's a bad sign regardless as women wouldn't do this if you were 100% in their eyes. Women test their guys when something better might be around the corner or when the guy does something unattractive. Sometimes just randomly.
It's strange as fuck though. Better to take control and end it, rather than 6 months down the line and you being a mess. The modelling request may be real and she is now covering it, or there is something about the other guy that she likes, or the guy is unrelated and she's testing how'd you react in principle?
You "overreacted" in her eyes by playing into this, and it's a bad position in terms of attractivness. Being logical and thorough is not good. Making a joke and then being short and straight if she presses is good. Then changing the topic once you have your say would have been better.
"Yeah? That's a funny idea.... I've this image in my head, can you imagine it? A guy who is desperate to see tits, so he becomes an art student, but ends up with having to draw 50yr old saggy man tits. So yeah, If I was in that position I'd ask a pretty girl like you.
But him asking you? That's creepy as fuck ~shiver~
Anyhoo~ If you're interested in modelling I'm ok with that but keep creepy guys out of the picture ok :D
If you want to try and continue things, for now it's best for radio silence and do something else. When she asks where were you, just say that you were busy. If she enquires, just joke "Skydiving with only an umbrella or highspeed car chase in bumpercars, but didn't go very far" then tell her whatever it was -out with friends, family, work, whatever (don't even try jealous routine, won't work in this case)
ex pua -bullshit- reader here
This also, you can basically say in an unaffected way that this behaviour is unlike her and kinda unattractive. She's usually quite mature and it's one of the things you liked about her. (Sets her up with an image to live up to)
"this behaviour is unlike you, to be honest it's unattractive as you're usually quite mature and it's one of the things I liked about you" (Sets her up with a better image to live up to)
Thanks for your opinions guys, I will settle with me during sleep. I'll see how I'll do tomorrow, I'm feeling sick to the stomach being exposed to such a behaviour.
Thanks for having my back guys. good night.
by the way: she's the most beautiful girl I've ever seen, pure aesthetics, but a bit volatile as you can see
the fact that she has an beta orbiter speak volumes dear op, she craves for attention and validation, that's why she is playing games with you, she did this because if you said that you was cool with her posing to a guy who want to fuck her madly, it would be a sign that she could be intimate with other guys without you making a big deal about it, this is nothing but a shitty test, i don't see a good future for you with this girl, take the hint of the others anons and dump her asap, it will only get worse with time because you're getting to know her true colors.
she could be just lying about kidding part
it actually could be that friendzone guys proposal did in fact happaned
but after reading your text she was too embarrassed but didnt want to lose argument so let you believe that she made up the story
Thanks for the adv, just watched a video of rsdjulien on how to pass shit tests, he really explained it well
In hindsight I should've just said "tell him im coming too so he can draw us both naked, just make sure that he wont get jealous, will you, honey?"
But i cant turn back time lol
But i learned from his video that i should embrace things like that and turn it around to make me look good
As to second poster, in context of my response above im now evaluating if it's just worth it, always having to deal with this shit or if i have to in case all hot girls are batshit crazy
Gn8 now guys
>>"tell him im coming too so he can draw us
>> both naked, just make sure that he wont get
>> jealous, will you, honey?"
That is brilliant actually, ah sure you'll know for the next time. Anything you do now will further the perception that it affected you. Live and learn, be sure to know this, once you get more practise in and been with more girls, you'll have less of a scarcity mindset. Good luck bro
>always having to deal with this shit or if i have to in case all hot girls are batshit crazy.
not exactly, you ignored one of the most famous red flags, she had an long term beta orbiter, this tells a lot about the girl personality, she is insecure and need constant validation and this can/will escalate in the future when just attention will not be enough to her.