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Alright /adv/ I've made up my mind and...
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Alright /adv/ I've made up my mind and I'm filing for divorce. What am I in for? Anyone here gone through divorce?

Back story - >>16846036
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>>16869884
good for you.

Prepare to lose EVERYTHING.

You mentioned you have a sister and a mother. legally transfer as many assets you have to them. Stocks, mutual funds, but avoid obvious stuff like cars and house.

Also if you can gently get her out of your property that would be great. They tend not to move a nested mother and would give her your property by default.
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>>16869884
I'm thinking about divorce to but am scared of losing my kids.
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>>16869915
Just make more of them
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>>16869923
well I will eventually I love being a mother. my babies are my whole world id rather die then lose them
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>>16869932
>my babies are my whole world
You're the worst kind of person. What are you going to do when they grow up and leave?
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>>16869932
Why would you die for an infinite resource?
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>>16869932
You are a woman. You won't lose them unless you're an alcoholic or a junkie - and even then some women still get custody.
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>>16869904
I don't have any property haha, the only thing I have is a car, phone and insurance I'm paying. Here's the thing, she admitted to cheat on me. "We" had a baby and told me a week after baby was born of what she did. Why am I the one to lose when she's the one wrong? We had an argument before I left work and told me she would give me my son. I told her that I had rights to the baby too and she said "mmmm we'll see, we're going to DNA test her and see"
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>>16869950
In my experience, women who are deathly afraid of losing their children in a divorce have good reason to. Also, keep in mind, anything less than full custody and being the full time custodial parent tends to be seen as "losing my children" by women.
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>>16869939
idk, they won't need me then like they do now. I'll probably travel do some other things I don't have time for now with little ones.
>>16869950
no my husband got full custody of his first daughter. he comes from money and his parents can afford to get him a good lawyer. he'd take them from me
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>>16869915
It is pretty scary, I can no longer be with this person after she told me what se did. Even holding the baby hurts because I don't know if she's mine. She told me the person she did the dirty was black... The baby has no signs of black but it's an uncomfortable feeling...
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>>16869962
You knew that going in and went with it anyway?
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>>16869953
>the only thing I have is a car, phone and insurance I'm paying
Then try to temporarily transfer the car to a family member you trust and make plans to move out. File for divorce and keep her in the dark for as long as possible.

>I told her that I had rights to the baby too and she said "mmmm we'll see, we're going to DNA test her and see"
So she continued to cheat on you, or, at least, is trying to hurt you by insinuating that she did.
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>>16869953
get a good lawyer and hope that the judge isn't a women. unfortunately women often get custody of the children regardless of who is the better parent. >>16869950 look at this for example.
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>>16869953
you better have plans to see a lawyer. it'd be a real shame to see such a waste of life leech off you with alimony/child support
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>>16869965
I'm so sorry that's just awful. I hope your daughter is yours. your wife sounds like a bitch. so selfish caring more about being a cheating whore then keeping her family. I'm really sorry man
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>>16869967
no, his ex was a shitty parent so I thought it was for the best that we got custody. I didn't think he'd try to take my baby away. I'm not a bad mom like her. I don't drink or do drugs or party or anything.
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>>16869968
The car is still being payed for, we have a sprint plan together, and I'm paying insurance myself. The car is under my name. While she worked she wasn't responsible enough and let the car get repossessed about three times and I would always get it back. We rent a basement at the moment because that's all I could afford after she stopped working. She told me she did the dirty about a month or so before getting pregnant "by me" the baby does not have my last name but hers because she refused to change it after we got married... But I'm on the baby's birth certificate. She think I don't have rights because she doesn't have my last name
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>>16869995
it depends on what state your in but most the time you being on the birth certificate is more then enough. also the fact that the baby lives with you and your helping to take care of her.
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>>16869995
>She think I don't have rights because she doesn't have my last name
she sounds dumber than shit. it's true the court system does favour women a lot, but if you play your cards right you might give her enough rope to hang herself. just make sure you're better at picking lawyers than you are at picking wives, and try not to argue around the kid. kid probably won't remember any of it but just be on the safe side, always make the kid's well-being the highest priority.
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>>16870002
Another sad thing that says a lot about her is that she's mentioned multiple times that she would just let me have my son. She has also said that she doesn't want to deal with lawyers and judges. When she said that today about just giving me my son was when I told her I have rights over the baby, she (lol) said no because she doesn't have my last name and I went into the room, took out the copy of the birth certificate I got from the DMV and showed it to her... Her mouth dropped and its when she said "mmmm we'll see! We're gonna DNA test and her see!"
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>>16870008
this, also start saving records of anything you buy for the baby, diapers wipes formula. anything like that, that shows you are supporting your daughter.
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>>16870008
Thank you, as racist as it will sound I'm using my friends lawyer... He's black and the lawyer got him full custody of his son.
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>>16869884
Save ANY PROOF OF HER ADMITTING THAT SHE CHEATED ON YOU. Any texts, phone calls, emails, whatever. It is very important that you do so.
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>>16870018
I've googled and I haven't found anything about also recording our conversation in the state of VA... She actually screams and curses at my older daughter when she runs out if patience
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>>16870013
she's sounds like such a selfish POS. to just say here take this kid... so you have two children by her? a little boy and baby girl?
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>>16870026
If you read the back story, she laid to me about my step daughter being mine. I DNA tested her and came out negative, she also made me believe she was a year older than she is to correspond with the time we dated... I still have an email were she admitted of lying about her daughter and the fact that she doctored my step daughters birth certificate to show her father's name was not on it.
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>>16870030
Yes, a son which is 3, and a baby girl who is a month... And a stepdaughter but unfortunately I have no rights over her
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Before we had our new baby she would not do anything around the house, always a mess and I would complaint about it...we her excuse for doing the dirty was just that...
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>>16870043
yah I'm in the same boat with my step daughter. witch really makes me mad cuz IV been her mother since she was 5 months old and she's 7 years old now. I'm really close with her and my husband isn't at all. he doesn't help with the kids at all but point blank says if we don't work out he'll never let me see her again.

that's so sick and crazy your wife lied about her daughters age. like how would that even work. like you can't lie about that to schools and drs and stuff how nuts
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>>16870063
>witch really makes me mad cuz IV been her mother since she was 5 months old and she's 7 years old now.

You should have been sterilized
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>>16870063
Her excuse for lying was that she wanted a father in her life because hers walked away. Before I left work she told me her biggest mistake was having a child with me
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>>16870073
that's so wrong, even if you hate the person, your child isn't that person. a parent should love there child even if things don't work out with there other parent. and like what you wouldn't want to be that girls step dad if she's a year older. doesn't make sense. obviously you were talking to or dating before you thought the girl could be yours. it seems like the wife is just a lier in general
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>>16869884
Get a good attorney asap. Make sure you have like 10k in the bank to pay him.
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>>16870084
We dated when I was 18 and she was 16 during summer of 06... She moved to MD and got pregnant in late 07... After four years we got back together and lied about her then 3 year old daughter possibly being mine. Made a fake birth certificate, I DNA tested her and lied about her gae... Should of been a reason to leave her but stayed. In 2012 we had a our son and its been going downhill since.... We had a new baby and a week after she was born she told me she slept with someone because she was tipsy and he was listening to her and was comforting her... Shit like that... But my wife has told me she hated me, she even told me once she hated me MORE than her daughter father... I don't see how though because I didn't walk away from my son
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>>16870088
I don't, :-( I've been the only one working my ass to pay rent and other bills. Shes supposed to start work this month but like she says, "we'll see"
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>>16870088
I talked to an attorney and they do have monthly payments so I got that going for me... Which helps some lol
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>>16870106
the custody battle my husband went through to get his first daughter coust 26 grand and the mom didn't even fight us. lawyers are sooooo expensive
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>>16870116
I'm staying positive no matter what, I will not let this destroy me as a human. I will remain civil and I will record everything while I'm at home. Sounds "dirty" like she says... Yes, she says that I will "play dirty" but I need to do what I need to do
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>>16870122
hay man yah you do what you need for your kids and yourself. she had no problems playing dirty cheating on you and lying all the time
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>>16869884

I read your backstory and questioned why you stayed with her other than sheer desperation.
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>>16870137
I have to agree with you. I never really had a girlfriend until I got back with her... So yes, desperation is the only answer
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Never get married again, stop getting bitches pregnant.

If you have ANY sense of self preservation don't do it again.

Also for the love of god please tell your son to learn from you.

Young men need to really start caring for themselves.
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>>16870322
Lol, I have learned from my mistakes. I will show my son that he needs to respect himself and to not let anyone take advantage of him.
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>tfw had a vasectomy years ago and never tell any woman I'm with
>current gf has expressed interest in having a child and I noticed she stopped taking birth control without telling me

Do I drop her now or wait until she cheats and gets pregnant? It's a typical latina whore, btw, zero emotion on this end. God she's dumb.
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>>16870350
She's actually white, lol
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I have one last question before this board closes, I don't know if anyone can answer it... Because I rent a basement and I don't have a lease... Can I get a place for myself and the kids(meaning two bedrooms) with out her knowing and when it's time for me to move give her the news... Let's say a week prior? Let her know the last minute? Ass for answer... If any
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>>16870350
You can get a reverse vasectomy.
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>>16869884
If you are in a no-fault divorce state, it may make sense to work through a mediator rather than a lawyer. I'm presently about 3/4 through that process with my soon-to-ex. Talking with the mediator we discussed how to divide assets, etc.

In your situation, things sound very hostile for a mediator but it's worth trying.
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>>16870830
She has a very bad temper and will lose it if things don't go her way. I thought about a mediator, we live in VA so I think we have a no fault divorce... But my main concern is my kids. I feel like to get back at me she'll try to keep them away from me
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>>16870841
Your wife seems like shes the man in the relationship..she cheated on you with a fucking black guy? You know how crazy I would go if i found out about something like that? I literally would lose my mind, it would not be good. Someone would get killed...No joke...Fuck that shit, its kill or be killed, especially when some fucking nig nog comes over there invading your pride. Its like when a lion comes and tries to take over a pride and kills the kids and fucks the women. Thats bullshit man, i would go get a fucking noose on that nig with the swiftness...FUCK THAT! Bro, I am seriously sorry for what happened. I feel awful, just hearing it makes my blood boil...If you ever see that fucking nigger, beat the shit outta him....and in all honesty, fuck..i wish you could just slap the fuck outta your soon to be ex wife...FUUUCK!! this post made me angry as hell
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I had an Ex like that OP, after she cheated on me the second time...I calmly asked her to get in my car and talk with me for a bit to understand why she did what she did..So she did, we went to a park at night. I looked at her after she told me why crying her eyes out to me, and i stood up from the bench still staring in her eyes, hugged her and said "its okay, its gonna be okay." after i hugged her, without her knowing i pulled out my hand from my pocket, leaned back, and slapped her so ahrd in the face she fell off the bench and was dazed. I spat on her head while she was grabbing her face in pain. Then i said "You ever come near me again, I will fuckin kill you, you dirty whore, have a nice life fucking random strangers!!" Then i sped off into the night like a fucking loon! couple weeks later, cops showed up at my door. She pressed charges but i got a minor slap on the wrist for it...
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>>16871125
It wasn't at our house, she did this when she would make her trip up to MD "to visit her mother" who was in jail at the time. I honestly trusted her but I guess I was being a dumb ass.
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>>16871145
Good story and thanks for sharing.... But because I have kids and I want to keep seeing them I'd rather keep my hands off of her. I'm not gonna lie though... Mu hands has tingle a little.
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>>16870841
Just stop caring. You get used to it after a while. I make videos for my son and am saving them for when he's older and I can show him I guess.

It makes it hurt less in a way doing that.

It also helps to think of the pros as well, you get a lot of free time and sleep and can so what you want for the most part.

Also your kids will probably end up hating her when they are older. Same shit happened with my mom and dad, its sad in a way but fuck her. She's a neurotic cunt, my pops is a cool guy for the most part.
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>>16871412
My children are very important to me, I will try to keep it civil. If I can't get full custody at least give me my own time with them where she won't interfere. That's all.
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>>16871183

>Her mother in jail
>She is an manipulative liar cheating cunt who fucks apes

Literally white trash, i can't see myself in desperation enough to fuck up my life this bad like you did, holy shit... its like you literally think with your dick, hope you stop being this dumb from now on so you don't fuck up the life of your "supposed" son.
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