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tl;dr worried that my bf is being unfaithful
>dating a guy for the second time
>one of the events spurring the end of our relationship was him sending flirty fb messages to girls asking to date them and shit talking me; most in-depth convo was with KV.
>after about a year of being broken up, bf and I try again and work hard to deal with past shit; finally at a good place
>all of a sudden he starts talking about this girl RB, and texting her constantly and liking and being tagged in her social media.
>when I asked who she was he simply said "my friend R" as if he'd been friends with her forever even though she lives in a totally different part of the country.
>he mentioned she was going to put some of the music he made on her university radio show. I'm excited and happy for him.
> few weeks later ask him when it's going to happen, he says it already did
>ask him why he didn't tell me and he changes the subject
>so my mistrust is coming back and I'm starting to lurk him to see if he's up to shit again
>today, {im out of town}, see he has followed KV on Instagram
>decide to deal with it directly, say it makes me feel bad considering what happened before
>doesn't respond for an hour, then just says "ok" and sends a bunch of questions marks.
>I don't want to get into a fight so I'm nervous to say anything. check to see if he's still following her-he's not. So obviously he's at least willing to unfollow for now which is good
>I explain that him following her makes me feel like somethings wrong. Tell him he doesn't have to talk about it but I wanted to get it out in the open.
>he gives a weak response "I forget how much you dislike her sometimes but I remember now...we r okay".
>so hes not taking responsibility....I don't dislike KV, I don't want him talking to someone he was trying to cheat on me with.
>a few more awkward texts about how we are tired then he stopped responding, prob asleep
>basically I want an outsiders POV because this feels sketchy to me but idk.
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>>16860105
>dating a guy for the second time
Stopped reading there. He's probably cheating
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>>16860105
Why you like this guy so much?
If I did that to a girl she would clip my nuts.
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>>16860112
>>16860116
Besides this incident the changes he's made since our first try are astounding. We had gained such a deep trust of each other so it's really sad to feel it falling apart again. Maybe I am just stupid for thinking he could change but it seemed like he had grown up so much since then. All of the original bad shit happened in 2012, so it's been a while.
Also should add that this girls Instagram was 90% selfies of her and 10% shallow shit like pictures of food or bragging about books she may or may not actually be reading. So he is obviously trying to see her selfies on a daily basis, which is what bothers me most about him following her;wouldn't mind so much if it was pictures of things related to his hobbies but nope, just a bland but pretty Instagram girl.
I didn't feel brave enough to mention this to him though. It seemed like I was pissing him off so I didn't want to go on and on.
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>>16860138
Have you thought about following and talking to guys on Instagram?
See how he reacts?
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>>16860105
Ahh, I wonder what relationships were like before social media. Must've been blissful.
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>>16860147
Nope, I'm sick of the passive aggressive route and I already know from experience me getting attention from other boys just makes things worse. The thing is we had been through this kind of thing and had established that we should try to just talk about it calmly rather than let it build up. So it's frustrating that he was so closed odd about this.
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>>16860105
Dump him. People don't really change.
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Forget it, this dude's not worth it.
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I say he's not worth it. As someone who has been through being cheated on, and has (perhaps stupidly) done the whole "work through it" thing, if he isn't willing to compromise or even make changes so you feel comfortable and safe/secure in the relationship...bye.
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