So theres this girl I like, and I've asked her to be my gf but she told me that she isn't looking for a relationship. I asked her out on a date January 23 and she said yes and everything went smoothly. A few days after that she was really sad because she was thinking about her ex bf who killed himself 3 years ago. I tried to be helpful, but this is like the 50th time she's brought him up so I suggested for her to try to move on. She didn't take that well and stopped talking to me until two days before valentines day. We talked about what happened and she fold me that she regretted doing that to me and asked for my forgiveness. Me being the idiot I am gave it to her. Then a few days ago I found out from someone else that she now has a boyfriend. I confronted her about her saying that she didn't want a relationship and she broke down in tears and begged for me to still be her friend. I agreed after a day of thinking. Did I fuck up?
Telling her to just move on from her ex bfs suicide was kind of a dick move. That sounds really traumatizing, doesn't matter how long it's been.
You should probably just move on. Don't be friends with her unless you are genuinely interested in her friendship.
I don't care how you said it or what your exact words were, that's how it came across to her. You just dismissed something that was very important to her and didn't even consider how she felt
Also, I don't think you fucked up. The other posters are just putting her cunt on a pedestal.
Imagine you were that guy she's now dating, what would you think of your gf crying to another guy like that?
She needs to get her shit together, until then she's just ONS material, and you are not her shrink.
You should wish good luck to the other guy, he's taking one for the team you know.
She's not obliged to return your feelings. If you didn't like her talking about him then you had the option of stepping out of the picture, but telling her to get over it killed any chance you had. That's one of those things you think but have the tact to not actually say.
Yes because stepping out of the picture would have been so painless -.-
This was the first girl that I actually knew that I liked, not just thought I did
Also I didn't ask if I fucked up before, I know I did. I'm asking if I fucked up letting her back into my life now.
I never said it would be painless. It was just a matter of deciding which would be better for you: staying or going.
And I have no idea whether letting her back in your life was a good idea. That's for you to decide. If you can handle her dating someone else and not returning your feelings, then there's no problem. If you're going to throw a tantrum every time she mentions her boyfriend or ex, then there is a major problem.
Its not that I have a problem with her having a boyfriend, its just that she didn't tell me to that she did, allowing me to casually flirt with her, and that she told me that she wasn't looking for a relationship