How do I become a good person?
I'm not a very nice guy, I don't care one bit about others, I always see the worst in them and I'm entirely self centred.
I've tried to act like a good person by trying to smile, laugh more etc but treating the symptoms of not being nice has not worked, people still do not like me. The only way that I can think that other people may like me now is if I actually become a good person - they'll feel that I actually care about them. Right now, no matter how hard I try I do not give a single shit about them or their lives.
So, how do I become a good person?
Use statistical analyses to elucidate the truth about yourself and about the masses.
The hypothesis you should be testing is that most people tend to be slightly good. Yourself included.
>how to feel more empathy
I find that considering situations of people helps. Like, just read a thread here and imagine the situation and being in that persons shoes. You can imagine a lot of detail that isn't true. It doesn't matter. Consider others situations. It helps you in more ways than just empathy. You will see how to solve problems when you're in similar situations to them if you get there.
This is a very good place for this. Because when you do that you will inevitably find things that are odd, and they (should) appreciate if you answer with questions because it helps increase understanding. Either for them or other people in the thread who can potentially help.
My strategy has been to go out of my way to be 'altruistic' only to those who will not only feel gratitude, but who will meaningfully make themselves useful to me in the future out of gratitude or a feeling of positive mutual relationship.
These people are all sure I'm a wonderful person because I go out of my way to help them out and in turn, they do all kinds of things for me like building work for me, like working for me, like supporting me loyally in a company I helped them be hired into etc.
In this way you can make 'friends' with people who you will them have some loyalty from.
The hard part is you have to be careful in your selection of people because many people won't feel appropriate gratitude or won't be able to help you out in the long run.
I think of it like a sustained chemical reaction like fire. By keeping the heat reflected inward you make a much hotter faster reaction. By this I mean you make sure that you only put out heat where it can be reflected back in to your own intents rather than radiated out into the surroundings.
I'm far from bad, but I'm not exactly good either. I don't wish harm or misfortune on others, I just have a complete and utter lack of interest in them or their well being.
But yet at the same time I want people to like me, I am a hypocrite.
A "good" person is kind of subjective. I consider myself kind, and very loyal to my close friends and family. I would take a bullet for any of them. I treat mostly everyone with respect assuming they treat me the same way.
But I'm lazy, I pirate shit, depressive, hate myself, and scared as fuck of failure, and not very successful or goal oriented. Does that make me a bad person?
I wouldn't call someone like that a bad person if I was reading about him, so I consider myself a "good" person. Other's might disagree.
You need to learn to be empathetic, I used to have somewhat sociopathic tendencies where I didn't really feel sympathy or empathy for others, I only thought logically and selfishly. And I had an ongoing debate with myself as to whether I want to be that guy or a genuinely good person like the kid me would want. I think there are many things that led to the outcome that came about, these are the most important though
meditation I feel helped as it calmed me down enough to not be stuck in my head thinking and so that I can rather just "feel out" a situation and the vibes and energy that come with it
LSD was amazing for this actually, I literally felt as if I could look into someone's eyes and understand in that second exactly how they were feeling, like I could step into their shoes instantly, it was weird, but I got along with everyone. It's kind of hard to describe actually, but it definitely was a major factor, I remember my gf broke down and started crying about never wanting to lose me for some reason at one point for a second (sounds like it's asking for a fucking evil God awful trip right?) but it didn't send me into a bad trip, at that very moment I felt the same emotion she did, I could feel it in the way she spoke and in her actions, like for some reason I just never realized the sincerity and emotional depth of what she said before, and it honestly made me kind of sad but much more understanding, like I felt like I was in her mind, or that I was reading her mind, and strengthened our bond more than it had ever been before, and I think that's the moment I fell extremely deeply in love with her.
(2/2)And my world view changed at one point and I think that's also one of the most important factors. I'm not a religious person, by any means, I'm actually agnostic/atheist, but I believe in reincarnation because science would logically lead to that conclusion, (the cycle of life, energy is never created or destroyed just moved and its form changes, our energy is dispersed through bacteria and plants and then rodents and herbivores, then carnivores and so on, and eventually it's only a matter of time before the same combination and form of energy occurs), with this thought process the idea that we really are all the same Entity, just born under different circumstances comes about. after I've experienced what I have in life, it's became quite clear We are all connected and are part of something larger, what that is I cannot tell you, but it's shown in science that we can read each others minds in certain scenarios, and I've experienced it quite often with people I am close with, so there may be more to the idea than just speculation after all.
Then look at ants (I know this is kind of odd but bear with me it all comes together in the end), ants are the perfect symbol of teamwork, I don't know if you know much about them, but I was absolutely amazed when I learned how they're actually quite intelligent, and they can acheive some pretty fucking crazy amazing things you'd never imagine, look it up, but not just that, they work as a hive mind, as in they are willing to sacrifice themselves for the greater good of the entire colony. now, think of what humans could achieve if we were able to work together so amazingly, the possibilities would be limitless, we wouldnt have all this war, and politics, we would be much more advanced as a civilization. any reasonable intelligent person wants to survive, but you need to want it for our race, your future grandchildren, or, basically, future "you"s, going back to the reincarnation thing again.
Hope this helped
Maybe stop with the Pagliaci stuff.
If the smile on your face is only there to fool the public (thanx smokey) then maybe figure out why..
Some folks learn to like themselves, and in turn learn to like others.