So I wasn't able to convince my boyfriend until 4 months into our relationship to have sex, he would hardly even cuddle or kiss aside from lite dabs. That was a few months ago and it's been great since. The sex for whatever reason is never spontaneous. It's been great, he is very passionate and loving. He spent the night for a few days. After he left though earlier today I found Viagra and suboxone wrappers he must of forgot in my bathroom. I don't think it's a performance issue because he's a lot more affectionate and happier on the days we have sex (apparently because of suboxone) and it's on these days that the "I love you's" and all the sappy stuff comes out. How concerned should I be?
I don't know. Maybe he doesn't find you attractive and has to sort of "force" himself
You do realize communication is maybe the most important aspect of a successful relationship, right...?
I don't think so. He's a bit of an odd ball, I've tried talking to him about and he's said he has problems connecting with people and depression and would come to it when he was ready. The only person who knows him on a deep level is his best friend who was surprised he took agreed to date me apparently he hasn't been with someone in four years so I most have something working for me? He's a bit of a social recluse so it's hard to get to know him.
You want to make her feel like it's her fault?.
OP i had a lot of trouble with my ex GF too, everyone is different, i had a combo of issues that i had to fix.
But the more i invested in the relationship, the more erections i had, she even got a little fat and i liked her even more.
You just have to make him invest more
The thing is we can't know the reasons for his actions. He could be using you to get out of his shitty situation, or he could genuinely love everything about you, and have dick problems. No one here is gonna know, hence why you have to talk to him about it, not us.
With that said, if a guy was popping pills everytime we needed to have sex I'd be worried
suboxone isnt so much a pain killer as a way to get off opiates and i can attest that they cause dick issues so that could be the reason for the viagra ....also pain killers really lowers your libido by alot to the point you avoid sex because 1) your dick dosnt work like it should and 2)you tent to not want sex while youre on suboxone ....maybe you can work out a time frame where you have sex the day after he takes the suboxone and before he takes that days dose ..i find that seems to be a good window
but communication is key ...this wont magically fix itself you need to talk to him and find out when his sweet spot is