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How do you fall in love?
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You are currently reading a thread in /adv/ - Advice

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How do you fall in love?
Most people are boring at best or despicable at worst
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>>16849497
Yeah, because I am sure you are just a fucking blast to be around.
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>>16849508

As you can see OP, the trick is to distract people from what's actually going on.
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>>16849523

what's actually going on?
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>>16849529
Nothing, he's just being a pretentious faggot.
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Find somebody who hates the world in a similar manner as yourself and be good to them.
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>>16849497

I get you OP, because I share these feelings.

But even I dont ignore the other side of the coin which tells me I am boring and despicable as much as they are.

They key is to find others like you. Althought... I've been searching for a while and I cant seem to find anybody.
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>>16849497

>how

falling in love isnt something you actively do or pursue, it happens to you. you either meet someone worth being with, or you dont. if ur actively looking for someone you're going to have a bad time.
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>>16849529

/adv has failed to produce any substantial advice once again, and in a massive display of reddit-tier insecurity fails miserably at trying to flip its own personal responsibility onto OP.

Thank you for asking friend-
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>>16849554

So thats whats going on and the reason why people should be distracted?

I dont know anon, you are not making much sense here...
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>>16849549
>I'm as boring and despicable as others
>can't find anybody like me

Isn't this a contradiction?
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>>16849554
Quit samefagging OP. I don't have to give advice to shitlords.
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>>16849564

Not really. It should be rephrased.

From my perspective, I found others to be boring. But to say that and place myself as a beacon of correctness as in ''This is the correct way you should be, like me, not like you are'' (like OP is doing) is foolish. In reality, as I said, the other side of the coin tells me the truth: that I find them boring because they are unable to make a connection with me and I am unable to connect with them. And this happens for no other reason that I am boring/despicable from their perspective.
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>>16849597

So you're both mutually boring to each other, right? How are you different from each other?
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>>16849554

I would sleep with all of those girls.
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>>16849600

I will never know. I dont care about them, they dont care about me. Wherever I go, whoever I meet, I am nothing but a presence really.

I dont want to have anything to do with them, nor they want to with me. For what reason? I dont know.

I guess we dont click, hence why I say ''Maybe you should find more people like you OP''.
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>>16849497
Before you learn to love other you have to learn to love yourself.

[spoiler] seriously OP you come across as a massive self hating fagot. Stop doing that [/spoiler]
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>>16849560

Sorry brother, what are you confused about?
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>>16849617

Yeah, I wanted you to explain what you said here. Not because I dont know, but because I want to see your explanation.

>>16849523
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>>16849608
If you both don't click, aren't you both like each other?
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>>16849600
>>16849608

Or maybe I am the problem and not them anon.

Was that what you were going for? I already consider it everyday.
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>>16849626

No.
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>>16849623

People pretend to be something they aren't to gain the approval of themselves and/or others. If you're paying attention, it's pretty blatant. And if you consider the arrogance of most, it's a knock against the ego. So we play games to gloss over this situation like being "witty" or "funny" or entertaining each other in other ways.

Or, like the first reply, we get so terribly insecure and project our own faults onto whoever we can.

It all seems to be a protection mechanism of the ego.
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>>16849497
Being in love sucks. You end up wanting to go out of your way for someone who isn't worth the massive amount of time you'll end up spending thinking about them, and if you think they are worth it, then clearly you're just blinded by infatuation and I hope you at least get some decent sex out of it.

As for people being boring? Only stupid people get bored. There is something interesting about every thing and every person. If you can't see that, then I guess you're just too dumb to open your eyes and learn about something new.
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>>16849626
>A cat is not a dog. A mouse is not a dog.
>So isn't the cat like the mouse?
There's a lot of stupid in this thread.
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>>16849642

I consider first reply to be a projection of the man that made it and an accurate comment about OPs situation.

Afterall, you who identifies the pretensions of others, their arrogance and their ego, cant you not identify them on OP like I can identify them on you?

Those who preach the sins of others know very well they are sinners themselves.
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>>16849636
>>16849628

Not blaming you at all anon. I just don't see how you are different from people if you both don't care about each other, so I don't see how anyone could be 'more like you'.

>>16849649
Please quote the mention of cats and dogs?
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>>16849659
>Please quote the mention of cats and dogs?
http://lmgtfy.com/?q=propositional+logic
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>>16849658

A key difference here is that I was asked for an explanation, however you were not. But this is interesting, so thank you for the response, friend.

OP never denied being boring, so what is the relevance of that?

I preach no sins- only pointing out contradictions.
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>>16849674

I would prefer to stay on topic, brother. There was no mention of cats or dogs in this thread?
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>>16849497
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VGelJhg4B9Q

People don't fall in love, they just think they do.
Still, if you plan on marrying someone, don't do it for love.
Virtually none of your ancestors did it for that.
Do it because he/she will help you and really cares for you.

You also have to realize that there is a massive difference between being loved and loving someone.

Loving someone is valuing their happiness and safety above your own.
Being loved is being on the other side of that.

I guess I just contradicted myself, but the point I'm trying to make is that love isn't something magical and cosmic.
It's simply caring about someone very deeply and having them care about you just as much.
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>>16849658
Quit talking out of your ass like you are some kind of philosopher. Trying way too hard to sound intelligent, but you just come off as an assclown that just finished his first semester at community college.
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>>16849720

Calm down anon,

did my post insulted your own intellectual might in some way?

Did you feel threatened because there's people trying to discuss something you prefer to discuss in your own terms?

>''These people are in no way smarter than me, I should let them know''
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>>16849695
the fedora'd redditfag is strong with this one
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>>16849680

It is relevant in the sense that when you are going to make such claims, like OP did, it is valuable to take into consideration that ''Oh wait, maybe I am not as great as I think I am'' and, in my opinion, people like OP should be confronted that way because, otherwise, they stay on this state of ''They are wrong, I am right, nothing to see here, moving on''.

As I said, but forgot to add, those who preach the sins of others know they are sinner themselves but TRY their hardest to stay away from such reality, so they can preach this and that with the pretension of living a clean life.

In other words, theres levels in the self absotion of man. When one goes in there for all the wrong reasons, shit goes wrong. And you never know if people like OP have ever considered for more than a second that maybe, just maybe, its not the others who stink.
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>>16849759
>I refuse to answer basic questions because I got BTFO'd

Have a nice night friend-
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>>16849750
Just not entirely sure why OP's post got turned into philosophical bullshit. Talking about projection like you just read babby's first psychology text. You have an air of arrogance about you. Even though you only display entry level knowledge. Basically you are saying a slightly more sophisticated version of "I know you are, but what am I?"
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>>16849764
>maybe I am not as great as I think I am

When did OP claim to be great?

What makes you think OP is not right?
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I am glad I caught your attention when I referred to your intellectual might. I was kind of hoping you were going to refer me to your academic background, maybe talk about your degree in X or Y, but that may come later isnt it?

Instead you decide to take a smarter approach in an attempt to hurt me, you decide to refer to my knowledge as ''entry level'', while also putting the word ''Arrogance'' on the sentence before.

This to illustrate your superiority above me.

Your post is the exact example of what I was talking about and that is that Yes. My post reeks of arrogance. And so does yours.

You see, I am aware of that fromt he very first moment I started writting that (and this) post.

Which is what I was referencing when we are talking about OPs situation.

I wonder tho whats next. What parts of this post are you going to pick apart and direct them towards me?

>Just not entirely sure why OP's post got turned into philosophical bullshit

I dont know either. I guess the topic seems inviting to discussing such things.
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>>16849497
You think "ignorance is bliss" is just something people say for shits and giggles? You have to be stupid enough to believe in love to fall in love.
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>>16849800
Are you implying such knowledge is stuff you find in a dissertation? My degree doesn't matter. I come here to be anonymous. We are all equal in that regard. Except those damnable tripfags. People like OP are irritating because they do not acknowledge that they are the problem and this causes them to stifle their own growth as a person. I was hoping to get him to look at his own faults. As we all should. Personally I would never complain that people are too boring. I make my own entertainment. If you can be there for people and know how to bring out the best in them you can make them really fun to be around.
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You find the one person you don't find boring or despicable, and if they meet your physical standards for attraction, you fall in love.
Thats it.
Jesus Christ you people go on and on about all this edgy nonsense and show off how much of a beta /r9k/uck you all are.
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>>16849643
Go back to /r9k/ neckbeard.
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>>16849497

It just happens. I have no control whatsoever over who I fall in love with. There are a couple of basics that everyone I ever liked, have in common.

1. Fysically attracted to them at first
2. Have the ability to bond with (I don't trust people that fast)
3. Hang out together, and do stuff together will make me fall someone
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>>16849549

we're all right here tho.
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>>16849846
>I cannot back up my claims, but OP is the problem
>I can bring out the best in people, except when I can't, like with OP
>OP is to blame, not me. trust me
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My problem is similiar, although I don't think of people as boring or dispicable at all, I just don't feel attracted to anyone beyond being friends. Does anybody have advice for this? Similiar experiences? Does it fix itself over time?
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>>16850937
Well some people, specially -some- women, don't date -seriously- unless they were friends first or it's a contact from a good friend who set them up.

So, just keep having friends until you met someone you really like
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>>16850947
Alright thanks. Patience is key I guess.
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Forget everything you ever learned about love.
It's a stupid word that has over 10,000 definitions.
Instead of looking for love, think of relationships as business partnership.

Your business is going to fail, if all she brings to the table is boobs.

It's going to fail if you are unsupportive of each other.

If either of you cheats, it's bad for business, but probably not something you need to bankrupt the company over, and throw it all away. You can still work together even if you agree that she is going to split her 50shares with someone else.

You do your job, she does her job. If one of you is slacking, the other has a right to bring it up at the board meeting. Crying isn't going to fix the problem, and name-calling will not be tolerated in the workplace.

Honey, you've gained 30 lbs this quarter, here are some weight loss projections based on removing the chair from your office. More time on your feet will give you more exercise. Oh darling that's a wonderful idea, I was getting a little lazy wasn't I.

Instead of that marriage bullshit where she thinks she gets half after she gets bored and fucks jamal, you each have your own subsidiaries of the company that are wholly owned by the individual partners. It's in your best interest to work together and be supportive of the other's departments. If you're in charge of manufacturing, and she's handling distribution or marketing, you both need to do your best to keep the wheels rolling. Never hold each other back. If manufacturing isn't keeping up with marketing's demand, it's best to work together to get on track, but you can outsource if necessary. nothing to get butthurt over.
no unrealistic expectations about that a man's job, or that's woman's work. it's all spelled out right there in your employment manual that you received when you incorporated, and periodically updated at board meetings over he years.

think long and hard about who you want to partner with before you invest everything.
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>>16849553
>jus b urself :)
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>>16849828
muh nug
Thread replies: 52
Thread images: 10
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