She just broke down and decided to end it
I feel so torn and don't know how to cope
help /adv/. My heart feels shattered right now
Imagine you have a dog. He has been your best friend for years. Always loyal, always happy to see you. He waits for you to get home and greets you with a happy face and a wagging tail every time. When you are down, he tries to comfort you. When you are happy, he delights in your joy. He is like a brother and a son to you
Now imagine your dog just died in his sleep today. This is what happened to me less than a month after my wife moved out. It really put things into perspective for me. It has been over a year and I don't know what I wouldn't give up just to spend one more day with him, but I don't care if I ever see my wife again.
real trigger, power balance.
spark, she worked on both of our valentines days, her sleeping for 16 hours on mine. got buttmad that i woke her up by calling a lot because I tend to do that...but then she went and saw her best friend while I was still available.
You do know how to cope. You know it's not helping you to feel sad about it, you know it's most ethical to sort things out being civil. You know you'll feel fine sooner than you think. Just trust the basics, it's time to prove that you're a man
Thanks dude. I've been through a lot (paratrooper and impoverished childhood) and I never had put so much heart and soul into something. This is like coming off a bad trip. I should go hiking asap.
Being the massive pussy that I am, I've kinda come to terms with it. still a giant hole in my heart and if she comes back sure. But I don't think I can really handle touching another female after this
We all have moments of weakness, even months of weakness, but you know you can do it. To speed it up you can do things like focus on hobbies and friends, maybe even try a new hobby. I've always found that if people coddle me, I feel good in the moment but worse long term, it's time to trust your rationality and have moral courage. It's just the best thing to do in all respects
I wanted to just talk to her for a bit, she started to feel overwhelmed with life. She really just couldn't handle a lot of what was going on since she's rather independent and just exploded. said she couldn't handle relationships in general and just cut it off. Now she's pretty much erasing me from her life.
Well it sounds like she needs some time. She might come back. I wouldn't hold your breath if she's erasing you from her life . If you care you will leave her alone. It sounds like she's just having a moment. It sounds to me like you wanted to talk when she needs you to listen, and care about her. If she is independent and you are adding stress to her life then your a negative not a positive.
If you do try to contact her just make sure you put all your energy into fixing her problems and show you care .
That's more or less what happened to me in september, she was everything i wanted, i loved her with all my strenght and would kill for her.
But unfortunately real life is not like in a movie where people win each other's hearts simply by loving very much, and she broke down and left me completely shattered and destroyed
Her last words to me were "i don't feel anything for you, i don't want to see you again"
I was very depressed until some weeks ago, i know how you feel, it's very painful and you think you're not going to find someone like her ever again, she was the one, she was special, and now she's gone.
I don't know if it will help you Op but when i'm feeling sad because of this i remember that we only get to live once, and you should not spend your one life wondering and feeling depressed because of someone who does not care about you.
Time will make the pain more bearable to you as it did to me, going out and meeting other women helps too.
You'll find someone else, who probably will love you and make you happy like she never could.
thanks anon, im just fairly lost right now. I knew i was too clingy and i knew i was just a whiny little shit. It just feels so bad because she did it because she thought she just wasn't strong enough. and that was it. She just didn't feel like she could ever make me happy. Just feels terrible but thanks for the advice man. I just don't feel like I could find someone who'd love me the same way.