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toying with me
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You are currently reading a thread in /adv/ - Advice

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I asked this girl out the other day and she came up with a good enough excuse so i decided to cut my losses, but than a few days after she asked me if i did want to go to the movies (i know, but she wanted to see deadpool) so i said i would love to, but she has just texted me saying she wants to go as friends, not anything more. she has literally teased me for the past 2 weeks with snapchats and i just dont get it anymore, should i just tell her to fuck off and actually cut my losses? ive never had a girl play with me like this before and its really getting to me.
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>>16814266
>teased me for the past 2 weeks with snapchats
If she's not showing you her tits or doing sexual innuendoes, she's not teasing you, she's seeing you as a male friend.
What kind of excuse did she give you? They can range from "not right now" to "I'm never ever going out with you"
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>>16814266
What did she say when she let you down?
Also, if she has been sending you snaps but rejected you, she's using you for attention.
Girls like attention, and she's seeing if she can use your attraction to her to pay for her movie.
This is a test in her mind to see what she can get from you.
It could be subconscious but I say ignore her.
She'll pull the whole "Oh wow we can't even be friends cuz I won't date you?"
But don't give in.
Move on my friend.
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>>16814275
"not right now" is her excuse but she has been using sexual innuendos and calling me pet names. shes pretty shy though so i wasnt expecting tits or anything without a proper relationship. Idk she just seems conflicted. Ill give it some time i guess and wont push anything.
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>>16814297
>Girls like attention, and she's seeing if she can use your attraction to her to pay for her movie.
This. Tell her to eff off.
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>>16814297
see i thought it was an attention thing but i never got the kind of vibe from her. maybe she really isnt ready and wants to hold off. im pretty sure she was in a relationship recently but idk any of the details.
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>>16814308
Or, just don't give her attention until and unless she shows that she's really interested.
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>>16814304
In that case it's possible she wants to know you better before making any kind of decision, and she told you to go there "as friends" because she doesn't want you to rape her in the theater.
Ask her if she wants to go take a coffee after this, or get yourself another date with her later (where you can both talk more). If she's hesitant, tell her "I just want to know you better!"
If she refuses three dates with you in a row she's no longer interested.

>>16814316
This is a tricky way to deal with the situation, because if she's shy and insecure she might just think OP doesn't care about her after all and not make any other move at all
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thanks for the advice so far guys. ill see how the movie goes and take,it from the there. i really hope a person wouldnt justify stringing me along for a free $10 ticket
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>>16814315
You always want to think the girl you spent time on isn't a certain way.
When a girl says "I want time" after just being in a relationship, it usually means she has multiple guys fawning over her.
And she likes it.
It could be innocent but either way, it's probably not just you she's toying with.
She is going to use you and the chances of her getting with you after rejecting you are slim to none.
If it makes it more valid, I am a female and I've seen girls do it.
I realize Im being kind of negative and of course not all girls are like this, but most are.
I just hate it when guys (well anyone actually) are blindsided about whats going on and they get hurt.
So Im REALLY trying to help you see what shes doing ahead of time so that you can spare yourself from the pain of a bitch lol.
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>>16814346
If she even hints at you paying her ticket, tell her "But we're going as friends! Pay your own shit". Actually asking you to pay for her will be rude in that situation

>>16814347
Calm your dick he's going to the movies not buying her a car
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Literally do nothing. Don't talk to her. Don't go to the movies with her. Find someone else
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>>16814380
Ignoring any woman as soon as she made clear that she wasn't going to date you is a very sure way to show yourself as an enormous douchebag to her and all her friends
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>>16814363
fuck you op is wasting his time and money. if op continues like this soon those $10 are going to turn into $200 because she continues to string him along and op is going to take the bait because he thinks he has a chance.
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>>16814363
Im the second one you replied to.
She's testing the waters silly.
If she sees that this is ok, she'll ask for more and more and the op will get more hope when really she just wants to hang out with him to use him.
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#wastehistime2016
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>>16814266
If you can't see yourself as just friends then yes cut her off. Going with the subtext of hopefully getting together in the future will end horribly for you. Just let her know you don't see yourself as being friends when you're attracted to her romantically.
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>>16814394
>not letting a woman use you = being a douchebag
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>>16814266
>than a few days after she asked me if i did want to go to the movies

Typical girl.

That was kind of like a test. Your reaction SHOULD have been something along the lines of "nah, I found another girl to go with."

When a girl snubs you or wrongs you the best action is revenge. Playful revenge---nothing too drastic.

And what's the best type of revenge to get on girls? Make them jealous! And we all know that girls are notoriously jealous of other girls ESPECIALLY when it comes to guys.
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same issue here. ive gotten dinner with this girl and we've had a great times but before our last dinner she said we will just be going as friends and told me she didnt want anything right now but at dinner i couldnt help but feel something from her. i think ive been in enough relationships to know if someone is into me or not and i couldnt helo but think she has feeling for me. the eye contact and and body language seemed spot on to me. but i think ill just continue to stay friends with her and let her make the next move if she wants. she wouldnt let me pay for her and that was a clear sign it wasnt for attention, and theres also the strong liklihood she truely does not want to date me and im just hanging on to hope. honestly op, take her to that movie. stay in contact but let her do the work, she may truely not be ready for commitment or wants to get to know you better
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>>16814590
>>16815079
What don't you retards understand in "He's not going to pay for her and she didn't ask him to"
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>>16814330
No longer interested or she just like the attention.
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Give it a chance to grow.
Treat her like a friend.

Most relationships start as friendships and most great romantic relationships are based great friendships.
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Ask yourself what you actually want to get out of the situation. If you want to actually date her, I think she's already made it pretty clear that she isn't interested right now (she's turned down your first attempt at asking her out, and then feels the need to reiterate that the cinema visit isnt a date?).

If you just want to be friends, go for it, it's a lose-lose situation. But if you really want something more with her, I feel like you're going to be disappointed, as others before me have said, it's all about attention with girls.
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>>16814266
want women, never need them, tell her your not interested in being friends, put the pressure on her. either she will have to admit she still wants you or she will stop wasting your time
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>>16814266
Maybe give his one shot. Offer to hang out after the movie. She may just be shy. But depending on what happens, be ready to drop her like a bad habit. Even if she is cool, never let your garden down. Women have an almost superhuman ability to detect when you open yourself up like that. So even if she wants to date never let yourself become vulnerable, regardless of how nice or cool she seems.
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>>16817439
I meant guard, not garden. This damn tablet keyboard takes getting used to.
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Some girls say that to make themselves feel safer. If they get too much of a sex vibe from you too soon this gives them the chance to back off. Kind of a test, do you see them as a person or a sex toy.

I've had women tell me 'just friends' when we first met up, only to end up in bed by the second date.

Then there's the women who want to become your GF before sex.

Don't get strung along. If you're not in bed by the second date have the 'where is this going' talk. If she wants to wait, she's likely looking for commitment. You'll have to decide if you like her enough to make the effort. If she really wants to friendzone you, that's fine (if you're comfortable friendzoning her) but let her pay her own way.
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