Im on pretty garbage terms with my mother. Let me start. I was around maybe 14 when our relationship turned to shit. I blame her though. It seems everything she does...turns to shit...but she refuses to fix them..mostly when I was a kid. Recently my grandmother had called me to tell us that my gpa had been admitted into the hospital. The one time I had my phone on silent .. I get this important call. I figured it all out promptly..luckily the time frame wasnt long. So my mother comes home and I make mistake number 1 and thats asking her to console me about missing the call..I felt like real shit...she starts on about on how is shes in trouble ..would I pick up then? Like i purposely missed the call or something..and further more making it about her. So check this out.,..my moms job is blocks away from where she works..and actually on the fucking way hhome..but what does she doo...skips her own mothers house and comes straight home...but makes me feel like shit about it?
this basically was the last straw for me..im sick of her dirty schemes.
Anyways..she acts like Im some sort of demon child because I lash out at them and say the worst things to them..but truth is she has been treating me like dirt...I don't respect her, I don't love her...I cant fix this can i?
my mom is a huge gossip, and ive found that if i told her anything that i thought was just between us, she would tell all her friends. people with 5 degrees of separation from me would know all about who i had a crush on, or who i was dating. hell, if i had a kid, she'd tell everyone before i had the chance to make the announcement myself. so i just stopped telling my mom shit
Well, let me say first that your issues with your mom sound like typical angsty teenager bullshit, and that you shouldn't feel so bad about missing a phone call or expect your mom to coddle you for it. People make mistakes, they miss phone calls, it happens. The best you can do is make up for it by being there and being alert now that you know there's a problem.
My mom used to pull some real life ruining shit on me. She tried to call my college one day and unenroll me because she was mad about something. She stole my backpack when I was in elementary school because my dad wouldn't talk to her. She faked suicide when I was 8 to piss off my dad, and I had to run to the grocery store and call the police. She stole my car when I was 23 because she didn't like that I was unhappy with my job. I simply gave her a very resolute "fuck off, you can't tell me what to do," and went out and made sure she couldn't by putting controls in place and getting my life in order.
Don't get me wrong, I love my mom, but she has these psycho shifts in personality, and the only way to cope is to literally get away from it.
Holy shit, do you even realise how incredibly selfish you are to even consider cutting ties or calling a last straw over something so miniscule?
You do understand that there are parents that emotionally and physically abuse their kids and you're here whining because mommy wasn't super nice about you missing an important call?
Get over youself OP, if this tiny thing is enough to make you break down and spew your feefees over 4chan I seriously fear for your future.
Good luck ever being able to deal with ACTUAL problems on your own, especially if you cut people out so easily.
My parents were extremely physically abusive alcoholics and I was raped on a daily bases till about 8. 9 years of therapy/rehab/professional classes later and they are pretty ok. I speak to them on a weekly basis and I even let them meet my boyfriend. We all start somewhere. No on is perfect and relationships are constant work. If you dont work and dont go to school then you should be cleaning the entire house, inside and out. Every single day. Maybe your Mom doesnt want to comfort you because you arent helping. Figure out why she is upset with you and fix it. Thats what you do when you love someone.
My parents were also alcoholics and I think our story is similar. But damn, I will NEVER go back to trusting any of them.
I see mun once a year during birthdays but am thinking of cutting that last tie too.
If we weren't related I would have cut her out 100% and I have been getting more and more aware that it is retarded that I would owe someone anything simply for pooping me out.
Im sorry if you think I made is seem that way. You never owe anyone anything that they dont do deserve. His situation seems a lot more of the dishes werent done than I have two black eyes. Like I said, 9 years of therapy and they went through rehab. Its really hard. There were times I never wanted to see them again. People have the capacity to change. Im not saying you should go be best friends with your parents at all. Im saying if they are willing and so are you and you have the time for 9 year of therapy then go for it. I decide to go on this journey for myself, not for them. It just happened that it was all a big wake up call for them. What they did to me will never be ok and it has lasting effects on my life. I just have to try and not let it deter me from doing something with myself.