How do I stop getting attached and emotionally invested too quickly?

>>16806782

Do you let people into your house the moment you meet them?

Same goes with relationships.

>>16806782

i used to think getting hurt once (let alone multiple times) would fix the issue but apparently i was wrong

you're hopeless OP

>>16806786
I don't mean to get attached, I just seem to build a mental or emotional bond very quickly. I end up over thinking things and feeling hurt when it eventually doesn't work out.

>>16806844

It's fine to bond with people.

>. I end up over thinking things and feeling hurt when it eventually doesn't work out.


There's your problem. Focus on the facts, not on possibilities and what ifs.

It's like you knowing you're gonna die, but youre spending the rest of your life worrying about when and how.

Chill out bro.

>>16806816
I've been hurt multiple times and my last relationship was a 2 year car crash with a very hot but equally psychotic girl. And I still can't put a barrier up

>>16806866
In the rest or my life I'm really chilled, I've been told many times I'm a very laid back person. I just can't seem to apply that to my love life.

What about keeping distance, not letting people in. How do I do that?

>>16806782
have you tried not being such a faggot?

>>16806887

>What about keeping distance, not letting people in. How do I do that?

See that's what youre wanting to ask.

You already know the answer. If you don't want to let people in, don't let them in.

My advice is to give people the chance to open up to you. It's always bears a risk when you open up to people. Usually you "screen" people if they're the type to be trustwhorthy. Ony then do you give them the time and your thought.

Literally dont treat everyone your best friend, but still remain friendly lest you find opportunities for them or for you to open up and develop somethingg deeper.

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16KB, 480x360px

>>16806866
>
It's like you knowing you're gonna die, but youre spending the rest of your life worrying about when and how.
Hey. Whoa. That should be going on the wall for some people. you are a mad wisdom bomber.

hear what I say now

>>16806919

Are you being genuine?

Thanks bro, I try to help people

>>16806918
I don't know if I really do open up to them, I haven't opened up to this latest girl. I've been projecting the same image to her as I do everyone else - this really out going guy, laid back, always up to party. She has opened up a bit to me, saying she isn't the confident person everyone thinks she is. But last night she turned around and said she 'doesn't know if this will lead to a relationship in the next few weeks'. Now I feel crushed, but I can't even let on that I am.

>>16806916
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MH17AHIklCM

>>16806938

So she opens up to you and reaction is to feel crushed?
Take her honesty and just go with it. Respect her wishes.

If you genuinely like her, you wouldn't treat her any different despite her tell you that.

Don't pressure yourself and her into anything.

You're just feeling out at this moment.

>>16806955
I haven't pressured her in to anything, we have come close to sleeping together but we both said not to as we had been drinking and did other stuff instead.

I do respect her wishes, and I haven't treated her differently, we said we would see what happens.

It's privately that I feel crushed, I felt so invested in this, and apart from here I don't really have an outlet. I really wanted it to work but the first sign of doubt and I lose a lot of confidence and self esteem. Thinking rationally I shouldn't feel this way, but it doesn't stop me.

In future I need to build a wall, but wearing my heart on my sleeve is part of who I am and have always been. I don't know how to develop that wall, do I try to be distant? Do I risk pursing other girls? It annoys me that I am weak in this respect, to have this failing.