I'm 22 and going back to school for a career change, how do I make friends without coming off as creepy or weird?
I've always been the outcast who was picked on for one reason or another and I don't want that to happen this time. I'm very shy and have trouble with social anxiety but I just want some friends I can talk to and laugh with and be normal with, how do people make such close friends?
Anxiety forums have taught me about social dynamics and from what I understand the more friends you have the easier it is to make more friends.. but how do you start when you're so late to the party?
stop giving a fuck about people and they'll flock to you.
there's a subtle thing when you don't put in any effort everyone else starts to try harder yea it's kind of fucked up but hey at least now you're on your path to active manipulation as opposed to the passive manipulation that people do in their daily lives.
Professor writing here.
You won't be alone. Every university has a lot (as much as 50%) of "older" students, anywhere from your age to their 40s. You'll spot each other as not being 18 and will gravitate toward each other. Let that happen. (The uni might actually have a dean of older students, special counselors, a lounge, etc.)
when i say stop giving a fuck i mean don't think about people, think about other shit that helps you. maybe you have something you like doing focus on getting better at that could be anything really, then the obvious, have good posture, find out how to get more money, groom yourself to look better.
to get better at socializing you just have to do it don't read too much theory it'll make you a weird social robot. perhaps get a temp sales job something where you have to interact with people.
i disagree. it's all about disposition.
even if you're ugly as shit if you carry yourself pleasantly people will naturally want to be around you because everyone has some form of social anxiety really. most people mute it by sticking in a pack so they don't have to worry about being seen as weird. if you can conquer it then you can start really living your life.
it's about getting rid of irrational fears that present no actual harm to yourself. meditation or some form of mindfulness is pretty important.