I don't know really what would help you but if you played 20 questions with me asking all the right questions that would be great.
I've always been very insular and alone, sticking to a handful of friends past elementary school and presently I talk to no one offline outside of family. I've never been able to talk to girls I've liked be because of morbid fears of rejection and a desire not to make them feel uncomfortable or be shown to be week.
I don't have a job right now, nor a car, and live with mom and dad, adding to current insecurity. I don't want to talk to a girl and have to explain that I ride my bicycle and the bus to get around and don't have a pad for myself. I'm getting the job and lack of apartment sorted around currently but I still feel like I'd be seen as pathetic for lack of a car. I also consider myself unattractive, though family try to tell me I am attractive.
>>16798231 >Why are you afraid of rejection? I don't even know how to talk to a girl. I don't want her to feel uncomfortable or think badly of me, or for someone else to see and feel the same. I was never able to do this rudimentary stuff in middle and high school, nor did my father ever sit me down and run me through talking to women and girls. I feel like nothing of value to a girl.
>>16798225 >I've never been able to talk to girls I've liked because of morbid fears of rejection and a desire not to make them feel uncomfortable or shown to be weak.
But you are weak if you are afraid of something like this, and trying to hide that is not only dishonest, but people see right through it. First off, make some rl friends, ones that you enjoy being around, even if it's just a little bit.
A major key to getting a girl and keeping one is to be happy with yourself and your life. I'm currently the same age as you and I'm not looking for a relationship simply because I want to have more to offer to someone by working on who I am as a person.
Maybe you're not confident in who you are because you grew up in a strict household where nothing that you ever did seemed good enough, but I don't know because I don't know you. Find out the root of your insecurities.
>>16798259 I'm dishonest for not talking with girls? I don't think I'm concealing weakness by withdrawing from talking to people at all really. I guess I can make some friends in class, I will work at it.
I don't want to get a girl for self help. It may seem that way but it's not.
As for a strict household, I have to say know. My older sisters have had boyfriends on and old and one has even married and had a child. I have however been careful not to show emotional vulnerability since very very early on. May also be that the girls were open and able to talk with mother about these things but I could not with my father, and still cannot.
Approach women and ask them out. When one of them says yes, stop.
For best results, approach women in purely social situations, and engage in some cobversation before asking them out. Work is bad, class is bad, errands are bad. Recreational activities of any kind are good, as long as she isn't one of the people working to provide the activity.
The rule of thumb is as follows. 1) If she HAS to be there, it's bad. 2) If she WANTS to be there, it's good. 3) Rule 1 beats Rule 2: if both apply, it's bad.
I literally did not lose my virginity until about the age of 21, and didn't have a serious girlfriend until about the age of 25. These days I'm 2 years into a relationship with a qt3.14, earning good money and still indulging in all the hobbies I want to. There's still a lot of life ahead of you, don't get pessimistic over it.
>>16798225 LOL you are too hard on yourself and seem very melodramatic
Foster some hobbies, take some drugs OR meditation to learn to appreciate the small things
Girls are a huge distraction and not worth the time. Work on self-improvement and ignoring girls, then they will flock. Attraction is a bitch like that. I used to be a straight edge loverboy, devoting myself to girls and such.Totally ignored. I became very jaded and misogynistic, using girls for my own gains and now I have a harem of sluts that I rotate
I'll never be romantically fulfilled like I used to yearn for but that's okay. Some people can be confident Nice Guys and that works for them. I was not able to have that personality without being a complete doormat
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