How do I deal with a complete douche bag of a project lead?
I work on a software team, and I had an incident the other day that has just completely destroyed any desire for me to work with this guy. We just brought on a new team member, and she stopped by my desk so I could explain some things about our project. During my explanation, the project lead stops by and sees whats going on. He quickly starts interrupting about "the project structure" and starts rambling on about how the project should be structured and how everything is wrong. This confuses me greatly as he was the one who defined the project structure. I quickly realize whats going on here. He is grandstanding in front of the new team member to assert dominance. I can only assume he is somewhat offended that all of the new team members come to me for guidance instead of him? Maybe because I'm not an unapproachable sociopath....
Once I'm able to get a word in edgewise, I mention, that he was in fact the one who defined the project structure, but I offer to change it for him it he would like. This really sets him off, and he calls in the whole team to give a "lecture on project structure.", which is really just a disguised way of chewing me out in front of everyone. The lecture basically ends up being a pop quiz for me on the software, but he can't stump me as I've written more of the code than anyone else on the team. After a while he eventually gives up and settles on a "well its wrong but at least we can fix it".
This really took me a back. This is the first time something like this has happened and it really caught me by surprise. I've stepped up big time for this project, putting in work way about what is required of me, and this is how I get treated?
My skills are in high demand around the office, and I can transfer to any project here with ease. But then I am potentially burning bridges with my old project lead. Very confused on what to do here, but just taking it and moving on just feels wrong.
Just deal with it and finish the project. Continue to build relationships with your colleagues, and you'll easily be holding the highest level of appreciation in your office. Your boss is a cunt, but just adapt to work with him.
Kill your boss and burn the body. Scatter what remains over the course of a month baked into muffins you bring to the office.
Make snide remarks about your missing boss' taste and how consumed he was with the job.
Assholes like that eventually expose themselves, as when they take all the credit for a project and then a higher-up asks them a question and they can't answer it. Just be there to enjoy the show.
I had a boss like this once. It was her first time in a managerial role, and she was power tripping like crazy.
Like your boss, she was completely unapproachable, so everyone in the team ended up just coming to me for everything since I was the most tenured in the department. About a month or two in we have this meeting that was a thinly disguised command that everyone must communicate directly with her rather than a co-worker (i.e. me). She basically forbade us to have any lateral communication, which makes no sense on a collaborative team. Oh, and she tried to make it impossible for me to move up in the company. (I was already job hunting, so it didn't matter - but what a bitch.)
She ended up running the department into the ground and losing LOTS of talent, but she was never fired. It was a big, bloated company, and I guess her ineptitude as a manager somehow slipped through the cracks.
Anyway, the moral of the story is that you can't count on your project lead getting fired even if he is the worst person and lead ever. And if he's this insecure, he's not going to be mature enough to change any time soon. At the same time, it's really hard (at least for me) to work for someone who I don't respect. Much less for someone who doesn't even respect me or my abilities. I could never do this >>16797905. I need a boss I can respect.
It would be a good idea to assess your job and see what else you want to get out of it. If there are more experiences you want in this position (or if you just want to finish this project you are on), prioritize that. If you've learned all you're going to learn, start looking elsewhere immediately. Also, feel out the other projects in the office and see if there's another project and team (make sure you vet the team) you would like to transfer to.
Unfortunately, there's no good way of ousting some one who is "above" you in a company. You either choose to deal with it or find a way to leave.
Who does your boss report to? You can always escalate to them and/or HR.
The key here is knowing how much weight you have on the project and ensuring everyone else knows too.
Every place ive worked at would bent over backwards for any engineer worth their weight.
The key is to ensure you and your work are known (dont rely on your lead to evangelize for you)
Don't kill him.
Capture him, make sure he does not see your face and hear your voice. Let him starve for one week, let him piss himself. Make sure he does not dehydrate: you don't want to kill him. Just make sure that for once in his fucking life he knows how it feels if shit gets real.
Then just throw him out in the forests. Best next to an highway. You want him to be found. You want him to be traumatized.
You don't want him dead.
I have quite a lot of weight. If I leave this project, it won't deliver on schedule.
I'm just worried about having that toxic relationship floating around. If I leave this guy will lose his shit. This is the kind of guy who will spread gossip, talk shit on me to the managers etc.
Get in front of it and discuss his toxic behavior with the higher ups. The fact you hold weight and can walk means you can speaks the truth. Keep us posted OP; youre in the driver seat so dont put up with that inept shit... Its good for no one.