I want to be a dad, but I hate women.
I mean, I can be comfortable around them (even if I'm not that good for seducing women, to be fair I never really tried) but I can't stand their mannerisms. I think every guy can pretty much feel the same way more or less.
Even though, sharing my life with someone I love and having kids symbolizes what I could do best in my life. How can I go past this problem of not being able to stand women's company?
Yeah, I think it has to do with me being 3 years in military school.
But how do I stop emphasizing every fault in women as something only found in women? And how can I get more comfortable around them (because I have to admit I'm not)
I'd suggest finding better women. It turns out there are women with some very traditionally male attitudes and outlooks - just like there are men with much more feminine psychologies.
How old are you? I feel like you're still young based on your lack of experience but it's hard to know.
There is also the possibility of adoption or a surrogate mother - I was considering a surogate for a few years before I found a partner I really wanted to be with but that shit's not cheap and neither is childcare/generally raising a child alone so you better be able to make some money if this is the rout you want to take.
I'm not that young (26) but I never made many efforts to be in a relationship, and socially I haven't had a conformist lifestyle since I always lived in small closed communities (military school and then a big student house) and didn't see many people outside of it.
I'm not that well-adjusted, but I make it work somehow. Not on the relationships side though... And I wouldn't adopt, this doesn't really apply.
Is this a derogatory comment? I seriously wish it isn't. Anyway, I often think about not having kids at all. I wouldn't at the moment be a great father and it stops me from thinking about it but I know that this is the only way for me to be happy.
It really isn't. Kids take a lot of resources, both mental and physical. This is just if they're "normal" kids--don't even get me started with kids with deficiencies, deformities,etc.
If you hate women then getting married is out of the question. Kids need stable lives and that dynamic between you and your wife will fuck it up. Kids are really perceptive and can read all the little hidden messages, even if they don't quite understand them themselves.
If you go the surrogate mother route then that's another ballgame. You know it's crazy expensive because you're paying to support some woman and your unborn kid at the same time. There are multiple things that can go wrong during the pregnancy too. The kid is gonna want a mom.
And what if your kid turns out to be a girl? Adoption is shitty and the kids don't always get a home.
Does this sound like a happy life to you? Why don't you just focus on bettering yourself and making yourself something of greater value?
I see what you mean... Even though both are different matters, I can handle kids and I always did (I'm the oldest of my four brothers and sisters, the last one being 6), they both can be annoying as fuck?
Should I really stop thinking about it at once? It crossed my mind several times but it's depressing as fuck.
Completely different. Your spouse is your partner, an adult who refuses to behave as one. Your child is your future who regardless how they behave you want the best for them and they can't behave like an adult because they are not grown up yet.