My ex contacted me out of the blue last week. We talked some and he suggested a casual meeting over coffee sometimes. I said that it's fine.
It's been six days now. I'm starting to think that he isn't even going to call me, and that he just wanted to test me somehow. (Although I'm hoping that at 28 he'd be too old for such.)
So it's been soon a week. I just feel like, that cause he dumped me, if he reaches me out after like three weeks, it would give him the signal that I was waiting for him and always ready to be there for him when he wants me to.
So, how long am I going to wait before never ever looking back or answering anything?
yeah he might have been desperate one night and just took a swing at you to see your reaction. Obviously things started working out again for him
If you need a date in the Pacific Northwest say something
And why didn't the two of you set something up? If he didn't say anything about the coffee after that, you should have asked about it.
If you want to ask him when to meet up, call him yourself. Don't wait around. Take the initiate.
to be honest you probably fucked up by not being more actively aggressive. it sounds like you're a very passive aggressive, timid person.
honestly, you sound like a pushover, that might have been what ended the relationship, your inability to make any advances in the relationship and in turn making him feel like he's the only one actively trying.
it gets annoying always being the one to do things in a relationship, if you're never making an effort it feels onesided. at least that's the vibe i get from you, is that you wait for him to make the first moves in everything. that's not how a relationship works, you have to work for things every once in a while instead of passively waiting for them to come to you; doing so makes the other person feel wanted. if you still want him, prove it to him by pursuing him.
get rid of the whole 'he'll have an upper hand' mentality, since you seem to want to be with him anyways. things will work out if you really want them to, but you need to call him and see what happens. he's most likely testing you to see if you're actually willing to pursue him for a change.
tl;dr: stop being a pussy and show him that you can actually do the pursuing for once. he's probably tired of doing it.