I’m fairly drunk, so please excuse anything that doesn’t make sense. Mild drunkardness was the only state in which I could do this. Whatever this is.
I have something to say, but saying it would mean that I’ve said it, which I’ve always said is ‘too chocked by finality’, or however the saying goes*
But here I am with the thing gathering steam on my tongue, and I gotta get it out before it burns my mouth.
I can no longer tell the difference between opinion and fact, between earnestness and sarcasm or an artwork and an ad. I’m not saying this is a bad thing, as, if history dictates, it could be a phenomenon confined to my mess of a mind, but I feel as if someone’s gotta take to the internet with a color coded binder system, separate the things from the other things and give every single thing a clear label.
Strangely, even though my relationship with the net is as tangled as a Guinness Book of World Records-acknowledged game of Twister, I relax into that mass of sweaty limbs and bad breath and laugh as if I’m having the best of times. It feels like home to meet the eyes of a bright screen, to press ‘refresh’ and ‘see comments’ and ‘back’ and ‘forward’ and back and forward and back and forward until oscillating URL’s rocking me to sleep.
Okay, so I’m avoiding the real reason for this rant, and being a bit of a wanker, sorry. The whole purpose of this is to explain an embarrassing truth to a particular woman. A woman who I will not name, but who needs to hear the following. Once I allude to the details, she’ll know this is addressed to her. I apologise to everyone else who has to suffer through this (that is, if anyone is nice enough to share it anywhere at all), but there’s no other way I can think to get it to her.
From here on out, I’m going to call her ‘you’, purely so my mind doesn’t run off track.
(Continued in file - sorry, too big)
That's a nice thing to say. And thanks for the luck. I'm going to sleep soon and hoping it will be shared somewhere - Facebook or something. But I'm not holding my breath. Once again, thank you.
Also, i've just joined 4chan, and joined reddit too. I've posted it a few times on different subreddits/blogs, but am not sure if that's an uncool thing to do. Anyway. Definitely sleep now. I should stop refreshing the page. Cheers to all.
>tangled as a Guinness Book of World records-acknowledged game of twister
the cringe is real.
You gotta be more alpha for the bitches shawtie.
That's cool that you think that. I honestly don't care about anything but her. If you share it on Facebook in order to tease me, that's fine, I don't care in what context it gets to her. It just needs to get to her. So, please, share it and call it cringe-worthy. It would help me. If not, have a good day.
People think this is cute? I found this creepy as hell. Some fat older guy catfishes some cute girl. I'm sure the guys wouldn't feel the same if it was an older woman using a picture of a more attractive, thinner, younger woman to catfish a handsome guy into a relationship. Maybe start your next relationship off by being honest.
Thanks mate. But it's fine if you need to say how silly you think it is. I know lots of people will. Even part of me thinks it's ridiculous. I just can't share it on Facebook obviously, as want it to remain anonymous. I really do appreciate it and trust me I think I'm as much of a loser as you do. Cheers.
I know it's creepy! I'm not as fat as I was. It's coming off. And honestly, it only took me a year and a bit to put this on, it will take me less than that to take it off if I really push myself. But yes, I know it's creepy. I don't think it's cute. I probably shouldn't reply to any more comments. The only person's opinion I should care about is hers. And we talked on the phone all the time. And the guy looked SO MUCH like me. I know it's creepy, but please don't call it "catfishing". It's not. Or maybe it is. God. I hate the internet. Anyway, I'm definitely going to sleep now. I should stop reacting. I'm sorry to all.
You used another man's picture because he looked like a better version you. ANOTHER MAN'S. It's not you. That is the definition of catfishing. You catfished this girl. Have you thought of speaking to a therapist? You seem like a nice guy but in need of some guidance maybe.
Maybe I did. Maybe I do need to see a therapist. But it honestly felt like a coincidence - it started off as a joke picture and got out of hand. Anyway - I guess my hope is that she can see past the cat fishing. Because we barely spoke about looks, at all. And she's not what you'd call conventionally stunning, and she'd be fine with me admitting that. Neither of us are. I'm just hoping the interactions were real. If they're not, I'll accept it. But i have to try.
I don't care for all the romance stuff but I'm probably gonna quote your bit about not knowing the difference between x and y in the screenplay I'm working on. I've been searching for a quote to use as a type of title card (I know it's cliche but trust me it's important) and this works perfectly. I'll make sure to credit you as Anonymous.
But seriously it's probably a little unhealthy to be this attached to someone.
That's fine. And thanks for the credit. Do you think you could share it on your social media? You could say that you found a line, but that it's unhealthy for me to be that attached to someone. Though she was that attached to me too. But yeah, as I said, if I'm wrong about this, I'll accept it. But i've gotta try.