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You are currently reading a thread in /adv/ - Advice

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Hello.

I am a complete outcast. I was always seen as an outsider, even by the nerds from the High School and College days. I wasn't part of any clique at all.

Mostly because, from my childhood to late teens, I was bullied to no end. Because of this, it became part of my nature to almost always act suspicious of others. I don't like being around many people. But, surprisingly, I don't consider myself shy.


I'm 23 and my only sexual experience so far was with a hooker.
Heck, even my first goddamned kiss ever was with this hooker.

I'm not fat, neckbeard, anime girls lover or any typical part of the stereotype. Otherwise, the reasons for my problems would be clear as day.


I went to parties before, but never could achieve any fun about it, alcohol has negative effects on me, and no girl ever seriously flirted with me. And yes, I tried to flirt MANY time before, but every girls walks out on me.
My brother isn't into parties (he even hates alcohol) but he managed to engage many stable relationships. He is now married. I just want to be like him.

I tried many dating apps and sites to zero success.

I'm not horribly ugly, but I am - very - far from being a handsome man either. You could say that if I hit the gym really hard, things would improve, but I don't think getting muscles that would attract the kind of women that I seek.
And yes, I used to go to the gym often and even used to do exercises at home.

The only time I managed to date someone was last year, but I felt like a /r9k/ anytime close to her. I even went at her place, we were completely alone , and there was no chemistry, we didn't kiss or fuck, mostly because she didn't sound flirtatious towards me, and I felt uncomfortable about it.

Professionally speaking, I suck. I got fired from my job a week ago.

And yes, I still live with my parents.


Should I plan to go an hero or try something else?
>>
>>16792072

got any pictures of you? not just to see how attractive you are, but what kind. its easier to tailor your approach to women if we know what you look like. some guys cant pull off the douchebag approach. some can ONLY pull that off. show us what you're working with and we can tell you what options you have.

>my brother doesnt like parties but still got married

did he meet this girl at a party? if not, look for girls elsewhere. do you want to get in a relationship with a party girl?

>dating apps, zero success

i dont use them. at best they should supplement a dating life, but they are rarely useful, especially for heteros.

>i dont think getting muscles that would attract the kind of women that i seek

im sorry what? are only whores interested in muscle? its easier to seduce ANYONE when you have muscles. not just whores. there are plenty of geeky passive type girls who grew up watching anime and saw gokus bod and want that. very few girls find straight up skinny to be attractive, and if ur just 'average' that implies your guy is past your nipples, even if only a little bit.

being in reasonable shape will help you get any girl regardless of the 'type' you are trying to attract. what literary book loving girl doesn't want a big muscle man like gale?

>there was no chemistry

sounds like you didnt actually want to date her.

>BUT SHES A GIRL

not enough, you said so yourself. dont try dating or doing someone for the sake of it. human connection should be about human connection
>>
>>16792072
Did you go to college? Do you have a professional career?

At this point you need some neutral point of view that can offer assistance based on what you look like and how you act. See the help of a professional.
>>
>>16792085

I mostly try to look for girls elsewhere, but like I said, they all walk out from me.

I had male friends in the past who had nice gym-made bodies, but some of them still behaved like losers, even though gym is also supposed to change attitude. I fear this would happen to me too.

I also have an ugly friend who looks like fucking Edd from Ed, Edd n Eddy (with hat included), but has a qt gf, so you don't always need a nice body to get girls.


>>16792090

Yes, Computer Science.
>>
OP here, I forgot to say that I also used to have therapies, but none really worked.
>>
>>16792143

>YOU DONT ALWAYS NEED A NICE BODY TO GET GIRLS

sometimes you see a fat fucking disgusting woman who happened to bag an attractive man. i never said you need it. i said it helps. and if ur striking out, you need help. you cant get mad that you have a hard time finding women when you refuse to take steps to make yourself appealing to them.

thats having your ake and eating it to

>IM AFRAID JUST EXERCISING AT THE GYM WILL TURN ME TO A LOSER IN TERMS OF PERSONALITY

thats how dumb you sound. thats how much of a loser you already are.

the fact that you wouldnt post a pic or acknowledge that you wouldnt is also rather telling
>>
You have self esteem issues. Girls can sense this.

Girls aren't that worried about looks, but they do want confidence. You need to be more confident than they are or it wont work.

try hitting on girls that are a couple of pegs below you. (If you are a 5/10 you need to date 3/10's)
>>
>>16792150
">IM AFRAID JUST EXERCISING AT THE GYM WILL TURN ME TO A LOSER IN TERMS OF PERSONALITY"

What? I mean the opposite.

About my face, I won't post pics, but I can say I don't look my age and have a weak jawline.
>>
>>16792162
>You have self esteem issues. Girls can sense this.
Yeah, you definitely could be right.
>Girls aren't that worried about looks(...)
...But you are so wrong there, m8. kek

I'm trying to date a 20yo but she seems to have noticed the failure of a man I am, because she knows I'm currently only picking on her.
>>
>>16792072
>I'm 23 and my only sexual experience so far was with a hooker.

You got me beat by three years m8, I didn't hit it until I was 26.

>I'm not horribly ugly, but I am - very - far from being a handsome man either.

Attractiveness isn't objective. We are the worst judges of our own attractiveness, and even weird looking dudes have women that for some reason find something about them attractive. Ever see an otherwise plain or homely girl that for some reason looks really attractive to you? Works both ways.

> I even went at her place, we were completely alone , and there was no chemistry, we didn't kiss or fuck

That's fine, if you two weren't feeling it then you weren't feeling it.

>Should I plan to go an hero or try something else?

Why an hero when you have so much time to sort out your shit and enjoy meaningful experiences that may or may not involve others?

I'm 33 now, and I always felt like a person apart even from a young age, and I'm still trying to understand why I don't find people as engaging and fulfilling as other people do, but things are going pretty good for me and I'm glad I didn't give up.
>>
OP here.
Thank you guys for all advices.

Upon reflection...
Since I have no redeeming qualities at all, and can't even get females to talk with me on dating services, all that's left me is, socially-wise, is to get serious at the gym for a long time, as much as I REALLY hate to admit it. Because I could only date girls from the internet, as the places I usually go don't have many females, and like I said before, party girls won't suit my needs, as if I ever really need to have sex, I would just fuck a hooker again.

If ONLY I could know how ugly guys or average joes get their gf's without social media...
Thread replies: 11
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