I feel pretty damned depressed.
pic related is where I'd go to do the deed. I live about an hour away from the GGB.
I just wake up every morning with this twisted feeling in my stomach. I fuck up in everything but this, I put so much love and effort into this relationship. It didn't work out.
I feel like that's a lame way to go though. Over a lover? I don't know. I'm sorry if this is very unorganized.
One of my ex's exs did this. He killed himself and every day she would talk about him. His suicide note specifically blamed her for the reason he killed himself. It's shitty and only hurts people.
But if your happiness is worth her misery, do it.
I know exactly how you feel. I spent 6 years loving someone who loved me, yet I tore it apart and ruined it. I kept losing him but for some reason he came back but continued to slip through my fingers. We can't be together because he doesn't want to forgive me, he hates and loves me. And I just hate myself.
I'm always going to love him. He's the one that I want but can't have. And I've thought about ending my life many times but there's more to life than failed relationships and heartbreak.
You just need to find something to live for, instead of someone.
Shit man..I have been married 4 years and every time we fought and he threatened divorce and kicked me out, I felt like dying.
I now am in this situation of I need to change and lose hella weight in 6 months or else the papers go through. I try so hard to show I care and we have things in common and supporting him..but apparently my looks are factor here..If I don't change em, he's out.
This literally tears me to pieces inside. Everytime I just think of ending myself because I feel I am failing him and like I am a fuckup. I've been institutionalized for a week after a threat to off myself and yet..I still feel worthless and like bad wife..
Just know OP, you arent the only one who feels this way