I guess I don't know where else I can ask for advice but here I go.
I feel like I should just commit suicide. I'm a 19 years old neet who never finished high school who is a failure at everything I've ever tried to be good at. I'm anti-social to the point of looking at people makes me angry or upset or sickly. I don't leave my room. (Haven't left the house in 10 months.) I don't enjoy anything. I have no hobbies. Nothing is interesting. Food has no taste. No friends both online and in real life. The last friend I had (online) was trying to make me better but gave up on me due to my abhorrent negativity which I can't control.
At this point everything is pointless and I think the only option I have is suicide. I don't even feel alive. Do I just hang myself and get it over with?
If you're posting on here for advice it means a part of you wants change. Speak to your doctor about antidepressants and/or psychotherapy. It's at least worth a shot if you were planning on killing yourself anyway.
> I'm a 19 years old neet who never finished high school.
You can get a GED if you work hard enough.
> I'm anti-social to the point of looking at people makes me angry or upset or sickly
Go to a doctor and get help.
>don't leave my room
If you're socially anxious go out at night when there are less people out.
I would continue but you need to see a doctor. It gets better, trust me. Just take the first step.
>There's a phone number on the top of /r9k/'s page that you can call
Or at least there used to be. Find something equivalent and go visit a psychologist. It sounds like you have both depression and anxiety. It's curable.
What's the meme? I was in OPs position, went to a psychologist issued by my university, was diagnosed with severe depression and anxiety. I've been to therapy for 3 years and I'm pretty much living a new life.
Don't listen to this guy, OP. He's not out to help you.
you sound like you're trying to get across that you've become numb.
you've given a bunch of metrics that would seem to indicate you find yourself a failure on multiple levels.
do you have any examples in your mind right now that would make your life even slightly more ideal?