>>16788135 Don't show any interest in any particular subject ever. If some armchair psychiatrist is going to use sperg, autist, etc as an insult against you, they obviously don't care about being scientifically correct. To some folks, liking literally anything specific makes you "autistic".
In other words, be yourself, bro; people are going to talk shit one way or another, that is inevitable in life, but you will know in your heart that they are just being petty morons as long as you are the bigger man and don't act foolishly back at them in return.
>>16788135 Try to think about what you want to say beforehand. Play out conversations in your head. Learn how to communicate clearly in as few words as possible. I know if I don't say precisely what I want to say, I'll be tempted to ramble on and on until the right words come out, so I have to either really think about what I want to say, or I just have to let it go when I misspeak. Also, only give information that's being requested from you. You know those kids that go on and on about some game universe, its characters, and lore and you just asked them what their hobbies are? Don't be that guy. One last thing, don't get over excited about something. You want to be at the same level of engagement as the other person. To sum up >Give only the information that you really need to give >Communicate clearly >Try to be on the same wavelength as everyone else It's not rocket science, man.
>>16788653 Okay, one more thing. Conversation is a back and forth deal. Engage with the other person. Try to leave things open to continuation. Listen to them, and find things that you can explore further. If the person doesn't pick things up, or gives closed responses that don't let you pick up the conversation, don't worry. Just let it go and drop the conversation, and if you can't think of a response, or a way to keep the conversation going, that's okay too. It gets better with practice.
Make sure you're taking deep breaths. A lot of people get anxious when they talk to people, and literally stop breathing. This causes you to speak faster and faster and lose track of what you were saying.
Breathe deeply into your abdomen, don't puff your chest.
Focus on using your deeper vocal chords to produce strong vibrations, don't use your high tones. To practice, take a deep breath and say a sentence like "We should do this again sometime." Try to say it in as deep of a voice as possible without sounding forced. Repeat until you find a comfortable, relaxed, strong, tone of voice.
Replace your "uhhs" and "umms" with silence. it makes you sound much wiser.
Never force words, it's obvious. If you can't think of that cool long word you wanted to use, just use the normal word.
Never curse if it's not necessary, it's lame.
Make eye contact at the same level that the person you're talking to is making.
Don't talk too closely to people's faces.
I don't know...just talk to more people and you'll improve. Remember ford: Family, occupation, recreation, dreams. This is what you discuss if you have no idea what to talk about.
>>16789500 Not OP, but I find this difficult. Like I literally don't know who I am and I try to take on different roles, but so many of them just feel unnatural. Do you just have to play around with different self-images until you find one that really suits you?
>>16789512 I wish I could provide more insightful advice, but one thing I tend to see is that people take "be yourself" as "don't put a filter on your thoughts and actions" because that's stupid. I've always thought that being yourself meant looking within to find out what motivates you and what makes you tick. Being yourself to me means understanding deep-rooted fundamental principles that you hold, and getting your actions to line up with them. If you're insecure, you might find that your actions don't always line up with what you really believe, which means you either need to reevaluate your values, or change your behavior. Here's a common example. Most people agree that succumbing to peer pressure is a bad thing, yet we do it anyways. If you're someone who thinks falling to peer pressure is a bad thing, and yet can't say no when someone gives you a tiny bit of grief, then you need to change something. When you align what you do to what you really believe, and believe me, it takes time work out, that is the essence of "being yourself"
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