I am 25 and I have been on okcupid for about 3 years now. My message storage is just about full.. not full with responses but from messages I SENT OUT.
I have had NO dates from okcupid. Some women have responded but a large number do not. I am not even messaging "super hot" women.
Its very discouraging. The only reason I use okcupid is because I honestly cannot meet women in real life. I see like maybe one woman a week who in my mind would be dateable. I rarely see women my age. My city is fucked in terms of age groups. no idea where all the 20 somethings are.
Okcupid makes me feel like shit. What is wrong with this site?
>using dating sites
dont use okcupid. focus on what's more important, dont focus on finding a girlfriend, focus on finding a friend. "like with all matters of the heart, you'll know when you find it"
nothing's really wrong with the site, it's just that you have enormous odds set up against you by being a straight male in the dating scene. women get flooded with messages from all kinds of guys, higher and lower than your own social status: what you have to do to stand out from the herd probably isn't worth the effort to land a potential date with a less-than ideal partner
Okcupid is a tool that you can use for dating, just like many others. Your success depends entirely on you and your circumstances.
You're likely screwing up somewhere along the line. Post your profile/pics/messages and we'll help.
Of course we can't tell much without seeing your profile and all, but I will chime in to say that your location is very important. I've been using OKC for about 6 years total. I started off in Madison, WI, and had a fair amount of responses to messages, but I moved to middle GA before I went on any dates. In GA, it took me about 3 months to get a date, and I ended up dating that girl for 20 months. Then I moved to the Florida panhandle, and things suck here. It took 11 months to get a date, and I dated that girl for 8 months, and then it's been another 8 months with no dates and very, very few replies. But honestly, I'm not sending many messages because the girls tend to be trashy and/or fat around here.
My advice: Branch out to PoF and Tinder to maximize exposure while you look for other places to live.
I met my girlfriend a week after I signed up, 4 years ago. In that time I'd received a couple of messages and such. I can reactivate it and show it to you if needed, maybe you can get something out of it.
But I guess mileage varies.