How to deal with being emotional insecurity

File: jared_leto_69893.jpg (95KB, 600x300px) Image search: [Google]

95KB, 600x300px

How do you deal with emotional insecurity or vulnerability (However you put it), the thing is my childhood was hell though I basically like most kids just assumed that's normal and now these people interact like normal and I am also supposed to do it but it's like a war against big army for me, not something I am sure I can pull off. To put it simply
>be me
>grow up in a hellish country with hellish parent/*s
>get through the hell come out a monsterish person
>be 19
>start realizing people are actually massive hypocrites and are just pretending
>realize you're problem(one of many) was/is high intelligence and absolute hate for lies, abusing *literally anything because of the hell
>try to communicate like normal but people get weirded out
>motherfuckeritsnotmyfault.gif
>decides to hide own disappointment coz deep down I know I am the weird one
>be soo good at it no one can figure it out
>keep living through this hell

I don't think the damage can be repaired and I got mental disorders too but is it possible to at least get rid of this emo trouble?
>inb4 mak frinds
NO!
I can get through social interactions just fine when things are strictly subject oriented but they take too much of a toll.